I panic for a whole of ten seconds before I am able to get myself under control. I was once again in detective mode; one of the perks of being trained by The Batman. Hesitantly, I approach Wally and release his hands. He seems surprise but at the same time lighter, like a weight has been taken off his shoulders.
"Ok, tell me everything. Tell me everything that has happened since that day at the Artic." I order and he does.
"Have I ever told you about the speed force theory?" He starts and continues when I shake my head to indicate that he hadn't. "It is a theory believed by a few speedsters, in which essentially the extra-dimensional energy of a force, a Speed force, powers all of the speedster's well speed. I mean, in theory, we speedsters, over the course of our life, acquire the ability to access this Speed Force that gives us our powers. For example, Uncle B and I acquired it from the chemicals and Bart genetically. Uncle Barry and Jay never believed it to be real but they still told me the stories so when I was disappearing I knew where I was fading into. I became once with the speed force."
"What does that mean? What do you mean you became once with the speed force?" I ask confused.
"I mean that Wally West essentially ceased to exist, all there was of me was energy. I became a part of the speed force. I had no memories, rational thoughts or even a body. All I knew was the speed. However, I wasn't the only person that had merge into this nothingness."
"Zoom"
"Yeah, even though I didn't remember or knew ANYTHING except for speed and energy, somehow, I knew that I had to escape him. He ran after me for what seemed like years, centuries even and he was so fast Dick. He ran circles around me, as if he was running through time itself. As if, he was catching up on the years I had not spent inside the force but he had. As if he was running from a different era to the era where I had come from so he could get me. Finally, he caught up but when he tried to grab me, for the first time in a long time, I was me again. His touch made me tangible enough to stop running and therefore leave the speed force, but it also solidified him. We both stumbled at the Artic and before I could even think about what just happened, instincts took over and I ran. I ran as fast as I could, without any place in mind. Just hoping I would be fast enough to escape him." He ends his story in a whisper. His hands are shaking from the exertion but he looks me in the eye, so I can tell he is not lying.
"How do you know he is coming after you? How do you even know he is called Zoom?" I asked because Wally had never even talk to the guy before running away from him.
"We were both one with the speed force, Dick. Once we got out, I could feel his hatred, I still can. I is as if it became a part of me too. As if he's inside of me." He seemed so terrified that I take a seat beside him cautiously.
"You may have been with him in the speed force, but there is not an evil bone in your body Wally West." I say forcefully but he doesn't even look up at me.
"Technically, every gene in my body is evil. Just look at my parents." He says with an unamused laugh. I recoil at the surface of his old insecurities and the fear of becoming like his parents.
"Technically your Aunt has half of those genes. Are you implying that she is going to turn evil?" I reply knowing that the better way to get Wally out of his self-deprecating moods is using logic.
"Of course not!" He answers affronted. "But it's different"
"How is it different? Because she is only your father's half-sister so maybe she didn't get the "bad" genes." Wally didn't answer so I continued. "Then maybe you are implying that Kaldur, Artemis and Kon will turn evil since their parents are Black Manta, Huntress, Sportmaster and Lex Luthor."
"I am not saying that. I am just saying that they don't have the same fragile and weak psyche that I do." He whispers. I throw caution out the window a grab his hand making him look up at me.
"Wally, the bad things you have gone through have only make you stronger. You are not weak. If you were, you would have never been strong enough to become Kid Flash and a hero. You would have never become my best friend." The cloudiness in his eyes starts to dissipate and a small grin peaks out. So I continue with my interrogation. "So, a speedster named Zoom is trying to kill you and you have been running away from him. Why did you decided to come to me? Why not go to Central City?"
"I couldn't. I don't know what Zoom's knows about me. Does he know who I am, where I lived? Zoom may be following them and even if he doesn't know they are my family the first place to look for a speedster would be Central City. I can't risk putting Aunt I, Uncle B and Bart in danger."
"Ok, that makes sense. But I still don't get why would you come here?" I asked earning a confused look.
"Maybe because you are the person I trust the most after Uncle B." He answers making me drop his hand as if he had cough on fire. I immediately stand up and put some distance between us. My body is ready for a fight.
"Dick?" He asks confused and standing up with his hands up in the universal sign of surrendering. "What's wrong?
"I can't believe I almost fell for that. How can I be so stupid? Enough games, who are you? Tell who or what you are or I am going to kill you? Is this a Scarecrow's hallucination or am I trapped in a dream reality that will slowly kill me? What is this?!" I am frantic by this point. I feel like I have lost Wally all over again and the only person I know can be responsible is right in front of me so I spring forward and attack him. I don't even touch him, he has run to the other side of the room.
"Whoa, calm down. What the heck are you talking about? Of course I am me! Have you not listened to everything I have said for the past hour?" He exclaims blocking my kick and running once again to another part of the room.
"Yeas I have" I exclaim approaching him once more and this time successfully connecting a kick to his ribs earning a groan. "Including the part…" I trip him when he tries to run away. "…when you said you came here because you TRUSTED me." I have him pinned against the wall. His eyes are not mad nor scared, he seems simply confused.
"Well, I do. Why is that such a big deal?"
"Because the real Wally West HATED me!" I scream in his face. His eyes widen and confusion is quickly replace with understanding and was that pity? My eyes are watering, but I hold my tears back. There will be time to morn and hopefully drink enough alcohol to pass out later, now I have to find out who the hell I have pinned against my living room wall.
"Dick, I don't and have never hated you." He whispers. A sarcastic and desperate laugh rips out of my lungs making him flinch.
"The real Wally West couldn't be in the same room as me without being disgusted" I spat. "I destroyed him and his life. I condemned him to live a lie. He almost..." I gulped before forcing the words out of my mouth. "He almost killed himself because of me. So yeah, I don't believe you when you say you are that Wally and that you trust me. Especially since the only reason Wally disappeared in the first place was because of my stupid manipulations and mission. I am the reason Wally West is dead." I crumble at this last words not able to contain myself any longer. I release him and fall to my knees where I proceed to sob. Heart wrenching sobs that I have been containing for the last ten months escape me and I don't care. I don't care that I am showing vulnerability. My best friend is dead and he died hating me. He died because of me. Tentative arms wrap themselves around me and when I don't push them away they bring me closer. He rocks me back and forth in his strong grip murmuring the same words of comfort I had once whispered to a certain suicidal fifteen year old. "Everything will be fine" "I am sorry for leaving" "You are ok" "I love you" And like he had then, I fell asleep while he repeated the words of comforts again and again.
My cellphone's alarm wakes me up the next morninf. Shielding my eyes against the sun entering from the windows and wondering why I had fallen asleep on the living room floor, I pop my back and blindingly search for my cellphone to turn off the alarm. I am in the process of yawning and opening my eyes when a snore comes from my left. In seconds, I am awake and towering over the grumbling redhead ('Ow, that was my head you dick'). It had not been a dream, my stalker really was Wally West or at least someone who was impersonating him. I stare at him as he rubs his eyes and stands up.
"You are still here." I finally whisper.
"Duh. Can I use your bathroom?" He doesn't wait for an answer before speeding to my bathroom. I follow closely behind and wait for him just outside the door. He opens it a couple of seconds later with a toothbrush in his mouth.
"Aggh!" He screams when he notices I had followed him. "Don't do that." He says spitting the toothpaste. "What?" He adds when I continue to stare at him.
"Did you just use my toothbrush?" I asked incredulously, earning a sheepish smile. We both look back and forth between the toothbrush in his hand and each other.
"Sorry?" He apologizes rubbing the back of his head and suddenly we are both laughing hysterically. We collapse on the floor beside each other unable to contain our giggles. I feel like we are nine and eleven years old again and giggling about some stupid prank we had manage to pull over Speedy. But soon our laugher dies and reality sinks in.
"Listen Dick, I know that things between us were pretty messed up when I disappeared but you have to trust me when I tell you that I never hated you. I was hurt and mad but I always knew that you didn't really meant anything that you said that terrible night. You are and will always be my best friend and I love you, ok?" He puts his arms around my shoulders and I lean against him absorbing the warm, his scent, everything about him.
"How could you? You have lost so much because of me." My statement is muffled by his shirt but he still understands me.
"No Dick. I was wrong in blaming you for my decisions because at the end of the day it was me who chose to run away from you instead of confronting you. I should have stayed and talk to you. Instead, I decided to leave everything behind like a coward." He spat with hatred, hatred directed at himself.
"You are not a coward. I ran away too once didn't I? After my fight with Bruce, I ran away and then Jason died because of my stubbornness too."
"At the risk of you biting my head off again, I will repeat what I said that night. Jason's death is not your fault and neither was mine for that matter. Stop blaming yourself for everything, you are only human Dick."
"I know that you are right, doesn't make me feel better though."
"I know"
"So…what made you change your mind?" I ask interrupting the peaceful and comfortable silence.
"About what?"
"Well, me"
"Oh, it is really strange…" Wally hesitates while standing up and making his way towards the kitchen.
"Stranger than you disappearing into a speed tunnel and coming back with a speedster named Zoom in tow." I reply sarcastically while starting coffee.
"Point taken. Pass me the eggs." I give him the carton and also the ketchup, I know he can't eat eggs without it. He grins at the gesture. "Well, while I was becoming translucent, at the last millisecond I had like an out of body experience."
"Like your life flashed before your eyes kind of thing?" I ask while putting some bread in the toaster.
"More like a regrets flashed before my eyes. In that last moment between life and whatever I was becoming, our last moments together flashed before my eyes and I knew how stupid I had been. I knew that there was nothing to forgive because I knew you and that meant that I knew you were hurting at the time you said all those things and didn't meant them. And even though it hurt me, if it meant that I had helped you at least a little then I had do it all over again. Because that's what best friends, people who love each other, do. I tried to tell Uncle B to tell you, to tell you that I forgave you because I knew you would never forgive yourself if I didn't but I was too late." I stare at him, silent tears pouring down my eyes. The bread was burning but I didn't care, I walk up to him and hug him with all my strength.
"I missed you." And I know he knew I was not referring only to the last ten months for I had lost him long before that.
"I missed you too." He answered simply while patting my back. "Oh God, look at us, we have become such saps."
"I know, can you imagine the teasing we will have to endure from Zatanna and Artemis when they look at us?" He froze at the mention of his girlfriend (or was it ex now).
"Shit. How much of a dick am I if I tell you that I hadn't thought of Artemis since I escape the speed force?" He asks awkwardly and with shame.
"Probably a major one but I am not one to talk right?" I answer as nonchalant as I can while throwing out the burned bread.
"You dog." He grins forgetting all about Artemis. We continue preparing breakfast and then quietly eat it. The silence is comfortable, like old times. Afterwards, Wally washes the dishes while I go take a quick shower. Once I come out, Wally takes one and puts some clothes I lend him.
"I look ridiculous, how can you still be so tiny?" He asks while pulling at the sleeves of the shirt. The shirt is fine, I know he is uncomfortable because the sleeves aren't long enough to cover his scars. I don't comment on this and instead decide to act insulted.
"I am not tiny, you are just a giant." I say taking my car keys and badge.
"Duuuude, you are leaving?" Wally pouts finally noticing I am wearing my police uniform.
"Sadly, I have to. Amy is already going to kick my ass for being late. I will be back with food at lunch, ok?"
"Fine" He slumps on the couch, I laugh at his melodrama and continue walking towards the door. I am about to leave when I turn around and engulf him in a hug.
"You'll be here when I come back right?" I ask with a little panic.
"Yes, I will."
"Promise?"
"I promise, now go catch some bad guys hot stuff." I snort at that and with regret leave my apartment.
