Author's note:
Hey everyone! I hope you all had a nice Christmas(or Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, or whatever you happen to celebrate). I managed to escape with at least a scrap of sanity, an abundance of Addams Family Musical merchandise, and a Wednesday Madame Alexander doll that my OLDER sister is terrified of, so I think it was a good year. However, I'm going to be grieving the loss of the musical in four days so I probably won't be able to say the same thing then.
But anywho, I've decided to continue this story because the plot bunnies have made it very easy to write(unlike TDDH which makes me Google psychiatric terms every other paragraph). Speaking of which, The Deep Dark Hole should be updated some time tomorrow(or I guess, today since it's after midnight) if I don't procrastinate too much.
To clear a few things up, everyone in this story is about four years older than they are in the musical, so Wednesday and Lucas are both around twenty-two years old. Because of this, this story could be considered a 'What If?' story as well as an AU. The what if would be, "What if Lucas had never gone to college in New York and met Wednesday in Central Park?" Also, I'm going to touch more on Lucas' problems with Mal that we kind of get in the musical. I'm mainly doing this because of a conversation I had with my brother about Buffalo '66 and what led Christina Ricci's character, Layla, to fall in love with her seemingly unlovable kidnapper, Billy. We basically came to the conclusion that she obviously has some problems of her own but it's never actually said in the movie. So I'm going to make it more clear in Lucas' case.
Sorry for the long author's note. If you're still with me, the chapter is below.
Disclaimer: I don't own The Addams Family. I only own two DVDs, a CD, three books, a t-shirt, a poster, a program, a doll, and a few illegal bootlegs.
"You want me to MARRY you?" Lucas asked in utter disbelief.
"Uh, no. I want you to act like we've been married for almost a year." Wednesday corrected him. "I don't actually want to be married to you or to anyone else for that matter." she added.
"So why do we have to act like we're married?" Lucas asked. He didn't really understand why he was even talking to this crazy person. He wasn't going to do any favors for the person who kidnapped him and was forcing him to drive his car all the way to New York. As soon as he was given the opportunity, he was going to either escape or call for help.
"My parents think I've been traveling around the world for the past four years looking for ancient devices of torture." If she was joking, her face didn't say so.
"And I take it that's not the case?" Lucas asked her. He thought that maybe he could talk her down and convince her to let him go if he was on her good side.
"No, it's not." she crossed her arms and sighed in boredom. If she regretted kidnapping Lucas, she was showing no obvious signs. Lucas' plan wouldn't work. His only other option was to escape. Almost all of those things on the news about kidnapped little girls getting out of those situations alive involved them escaping somehow.
"I have to go to the bathroom." Lucas announced. He was lying.
"Thanks for sharing, but we're not stopping." Wednesday replied instantly.
"I have to stop. If I hold it in, I could get a urinary tract infection." Lucas stated.
"Sexy." Wednesday retorted sarcastically. Lucas gripped the steering wheel tighter. He had to get the crazy girl to let him stop at a rest stop. From there he would go into the men's room and call for help on his cell phone. He couldn't help but think that his captor was slightly ignorant for not taking it away from him in the first place.
"I really have to go. You at least owe me a bathroom break considering the circumstances of us taking this road trip together." Lucas pleaded and attempted to play the guilt card.
"I don't owe you a single thing. But I suppose If you really need to relieve yourself, you can pull over right up there." she pointed to the side of the road up ahead.
"There's no rest area up there." Lucas said even though he was pretty sure he knew where this was going.
"You're as far as I know, anatomically male. You can pee on a tree." Wednesday said bluntly. Lucas sighed and pulled over. He would have to think fast. The only way he could escape this way was to run as fast as he could into the woods at the side of the road and hope he could get away. He opened the door hesitantly in case his deranged travel mate changed her mind suddenly.
"Don't take too long. I'm on a tight schedule." she told him. Lucas got out of the car and started walking towards the trees. With his back turned to the girl, he managed to fake unzipping his fly and silently prepared himself to run at speeds track stars would be jealous of.
He was about to make a run for it when he heard his car's electric window roll down. He expected the girl's demanding, yet beautiful voice to shout something, but there were no sounds but a few cars speeding past on the freeway. He could feel eyes on him like lasers. He wouldn't have much time to run. He looked over his shoulder to give the girl a reassuring look but instead, his eyes met the end of the crossbow she'd laid on the backseat earlier, currently aimed at his head.
"Just a precaution." she called. Lucas could feel his knees shake. The last weapon he'd had pointed at him was his cousin's air-soft gun and that had ended with him getting his cheek shot with a plastic bee bee. The girl's crossbow would most definitely do more damage than a tiny, red mark. Escape would be impossible. The moment he would start to retreat, an arrow would impale him. He had no choice but to turn around and walk back to the car. The girl pulled her weapon back into the car and rolled up the window as Lucas got back into the drivers seat. He pulled back onto the freeway without a word to the kidnapping girl. There was another hour of complete silence.
Lucas tried to focus solely on driving during this time, but found his mind wandering to other things. Mainly, what his father would say when he found out that his son allowed himself to be kidnapped (and by a girl, no less!). His father's disappointment in him was no secret, but Lucas never liked it when he knew the exact causes. These instances usually led to him doing things that made his father happy, but made Lucas feel like his hopes and dreams were being burned in the fireplace. Things like quitting the school newspaper to play baseball, or switching his college major from literature to architecture.
Luckily, Lucas had his mother for a saving grace. Like him, she was also a poet. She was the one that put his A+ essays on the fridge and listened to his poems. She was the one that comforted him whenever he was told he wasn't a blonde cheerleader's 'type'. Honestly, Lucas was even more saddened by what he knew his mother's reaction would be to his kidnapping than his father's. She would be more than frantic. It would be worse than the time Lucas had decided to 'run away' when he was seven and had gotten two blocks away from his house, only to be caught by his crying mother. She was the only reason why he was doing everything he could to not get killed by his captor.
Just as they'd crossed into Pennsylvania, Lucas caught himself glancing over at her every once in a while. She sat with her arms crossed as she looked straight ahead, her face expressionless. He couldn't deny that she possessed a unique form of beauty. Her skin was so pale she could have been one of those screwball, sparkling vampires that twelve year old girls were obsessed with, but she somehow pulled it off. And her big, brown eyes were really pretty once he saw past the crazed look in them.
"Would you please stop staring at me and watch the road. I'm not looking forward to seeing my parents, but I'd rather not die in a Honda." The girl said to Lucas without turning her head to look at him.
"Sorry." Lucas apologized and tried paying more attention to the road. After a few minutes though, he couldn't keep his mouth shut anymore. "What's your name?" he asked. "I mean, if you want me to be your fake husband, I should at least know your name." He knew the girl couldn't argue his logic.
"Wednesday." She replied.
"Interesting. I pegged you as a Britney." Lucas joked. Wednesday ignored this.
"Are you familiar with the poem, Monday's Child?" She asked.
"Wednesday's child is full of woe." Lucas quoted. "It fits you. Well, the original version that is. If your parents were going off of the 1887 version, your name should have been Friday." he added.
"Friday is my middle name." Wednesday admitted. "You clearly like poetry." She seemed to be acting warmer towards Lucas. This confused him but he decided to go with it.
"I do. I actually considered writing it for a living a few years back." Lucas said. It pained him slightly to remember his early college dreams. The fact that he was now going to New York, the very city he'd always dreamed of going to, against his will, didn't help this.
"Why didn't you?" Wednesday asked. Lucas shrugged.
"I don't know. I guess I realized it would have been impractical. I mean, my mom writes poetry, but she doesn't work." He attempted to explain. Wednesday nodded, completely understanding him.
"Do you mind if I explain that for you?" She asked.
"Be my guest."
"You love writing and your mother probably encouraged it. Your father strongly disapproved even though he's too caught up in his own work to notice anything else. He probably owns a business that he wants you to take over so there's clearly no room for writing. Thus, the reason why you still live in Willard, Ohio even though you hate it." She said all of this in her normal monotone. Lucas felt his jaw involuntarily drop. "Was I close?" She asked.
"Do you have ESP?" Lucas asked. Wednesday smirked
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