Another Chapter be up =)

Few things before this one:

-Thanks very much for the reviews and story alerts! It's a great motivator to write more of the story knowing people like it :D

-Also I have attempted to take your advice and make it better than the last chapter please let me know if there are other ways to make it better; much appreciated!

-I will attempt to get chapters out ASAP on this story and also my other story involving Tali and Shepard, if you ever get the time to check it out would be great!

-Again reviews are much appreciated and also if you have any ideas of where you'd like the story to go (places, people involved etc) please let me know!

-Next chapter will be less depressing and more light hearted now that Samara has confessed her feelings!

Thanks muchly for stopping by!

Much love

AsozMania


Shepard was currently in his quarters his mind at a total loss, he always had managed to look on the bright side of things in everything but somehow this had completely destroyed him, even witnessing all the mutilation and torture within the Collector Base hadn't phased him as much as this one asari Justicar.

Over the past week Shepard had lost all hope and not just for Samara, the task of defeating the Reapers the invincible sentient race of machines seemed much more of a daunting task than ever before, he was worried not for his own safety but for that of his crew, without the crew Shepard was nothing, there was only one way to defeat the Reapers and that was through uniting the Galaxy; if Shepard couldn't hold his own crew together then they were doomed.

No matter what Shepard attempted to concentrate on his mind always seemed to be only interested in one thing, and that certain thought kept repeating itself in his head much similar to one of the old twentieth century tape recorders sticking constantly. This was the first love that he had had, hell he may have been the hero of the Citadel Battle and adored by fans of all species and ages but the one person he was attracted to have shot him down was incredibly depressing.

All the fish inside the tank had died from lack of feeding, normally Shepard took great care over the fish but over the past week he didn't feel any remorse watching them slowly become predatory towards each other until there was only one left swollen greatly past it's normal size because of the sheer amount of food that it got compared to normal.

Although Shepard was greatly upset he only ever shed a few tears, he wasn't the type of person to cry, rigorous years of military training had drilled into him that it was a sign of weakness and that was all he had known, the model of the Shadow Broker's ship though showed a different side of Shepard.

He had been browsing over the security feeds on his private terminal and watched the whole crew laughing, joking and going about their daily business as though nothing had happened, Shepard became filled with bitterness and loneliness watching them and from a bout of sudden anger the Broker's ship had taken the full impact of a "Shepard special" which he instantly regretted as it had taken ages for him to build that ship; he set about gathering the pieces when he heard the slow hum of the elevator growing louder and louder.

Shepard immediately sprang into action, these were his own problems and he didn't want pity from the crew especially someone like his best friend Garrus who would never let him live it down, he had to mask being just a mortal man who had stupid selfish problems for them. Like he was back to his old happy self again he quickly brushed up the model and left it on the table ready for him to do later and waited for the lift to come to a halt on his floor; before the doors opened one of his lady killer smiles appeared on his face but instantly vanished when he saw who it was.

There she was, the problem of all his pain, however still as beautiful if not more so than Shepard remembered , he attempted to force a smile but it just wouldn't work, it looked more of a grimace which he instantly regretted.

"Shepard" Samara's voice interrupted the silence noticeably not as emotionless and cold as normal.

"Oh…" Shepard was shocked that Samara was the one standing in the elevator; he had fully expected someone like Garrus or Grunt to be in the space that Samara filled just to make fun of him.

A considerable amount of time passed and although Shepard didn't know it Samara was just as nervous and dispirited as he was; she decided to press on again.

"Shepard?" Samara repeated again her voice now easily showing the concern she had for her Commander.

Shepard however didn't manage to answer Samara, he had felt woozy for the past few days however now coupled with the fact that Samara had come up to his cabin the wooziness overcame him and he collapsed to the floor his head taking the full force of the impact; the last thing he saw was a blue blur rush over to him and a faint noise reaching him.

"Shepard….. Shepa"

His mind went black.


"Hold on Kaiden, I'll be coming back to get you too"

"I think we both know that's not going to happen Commander"

"Commander you need to arm the nuke and get out of there! Left flank supressing fire supressing fi"

Kaiden's comm suddenly went dead and before Shepard could attempt to contact him again Saren grabbed his throat forcing him into the air.

"Well we meet again Shepard" his voice sounded more mechanical than the last time they had spoken.

Shepard said nothing and waited for his chance, as Saren gazed around at the nuke and Chief Williams wounded on the floor Shepard struck, the punch connected straight with Saren's lower jaw and knocked him backwards forcing him to release Shepard from the vice-like grip on his throat, in the short space that Shepard fell to the floor his hand was already reaching for his pistol and as he hit the floor he spun and pointed his gun at where Saren should have been; however he was already on the floating platform to far away for his pistol to be effective Shepard threw it away in anger.

"Kaiden come in do you read me!" there was no response.

Shepard scooped Williams onto his shoulder and started to walk towards the Normandy just as it touched down.

"Come on Kaiden I'm not leaving you behind!"

A faint crackle on Shepard's radio then a voice was heard.

"Hey Commander, don't worry about me you need to get out of here now!"

"Kaiden I'm not leaving you behind!"

"It's ok Commander, I'll try and distract the attention of the remaining Geth and Krogan so they don't disarm the Nuke" Kaiden paused for a second before adding "It has been my honour serving with you Shepard I'll see you on the other side"

Shepard was about to reply when Kaiden cut the comms, suddenly a barrage of rifle-fire and explosions rocked the facility, with little time left Shepard hoisted Williams back onto his shoulder and sprinted for the Normandy; he leapt into the hanger and closed it behind him; over the speakers Joker's voice could be heard.

"Ok people strap in! This is gonna be a close one!"

When Shepard finally made it up to the CIC the Normandy was just leaving the atmosphere of Virmire, the explosion of the Nuke could be visibly seen on the planet surface below, a sudden surge of sadness ran through Shepard and he punched the window with all his might sending shatters all throughout the window.


Shepard woke up with a jolt in a cold sweat, his breathing was heavy and he didn't have a clue where he was. Allowing his eyes to adjust for a moment he finally realised he was in the Med Bay, before his eyes could take in any more of his surroundings his vision was swamped with Dr Chakwas standing over him.

"Ah Commander I see your finally awake"

Shepard was glad to see a face from the present.

"Ah Doctor, boy am I glad to see you"

"Dreaming of Virmire again were we?"

"Yeah I was" Shepard suddenly became anxious "Wait how did you know I was dreaming about Virmire?"

"You do talk in your sleep Commander"

"Oh yeah forgot that" Shepard started to blush as he remembered the time him and Chakwas shared that bottle of Serrice Ice brandy, he had heard a whole different side of the Doctor that night.

"Anyway Doctor what am I doing here?"

"Well it appears you had been so focused on completing those mission reports that your body went into a "shut-down state" because you hadn't moved for so long, due to the sudden change many of your organ's couldn't cope and failed and your cybernetics weren't much help either; that's the last time I let Cerberus anywhere near your"

Shepard chuckled at that last comment "How long am I shackled to Med Bay then?"

"Actually Commander you should only be in here for a few more hours, sleep is an excellent remedy I must say; it's good to have you back Commander"

"It's good to be back Doctor"

"Also before you leave there is someone who wishes to see you, is it ok if they come in now or should I allow you to rest for a little while longer?"

"It's ok Doctor send them in"

Dr Chakwas moved away from Shepard before keying in on her Omni-Tool the code to unlock the Medi- Bay doors, she did this when Shepard was here as she didn't want someone from the crew coming in and taking rather embarrassing photos of him, she thought Garrus would love to get back at Shepard after all the pranks he played him; they both acted like children sometimes.

With a sigh from Chakwas reminiscing about her younger days the Med Bay doors opened and through it stepped Samara, she had been dying to see Shepard and finally get it off her chest her feelings but everything seemed to be against her at the moment, she glanced over at Chakwas who'd snapped out of her memories; with a glance at both of them she started to move out of the room.

"I'll leave you two alone for a while; however Commander please alert me if you are in any pain whatsoever ok?"

"Ok Doctor thanks for everything"

"No problem Commander"

When Chakwas had left an uneasy silence followed, finally Shepard broke the silence.

"Hey Samara"

"Shepard"

"Is there something you wish to speak to me about?"

"Actually yes there is something" She moved closed to the bed Shepard was lying on.

Before Samara could speak though Shepard shifted wincing at the pain that was apparent in his lower ribs and Samara moved quickly towards him; closing the gap to just a metre Shepard's heart rate started to increase.

"Before you say anything though I would just like to say I'm sorry Samara"

Samara was taken aback by this comment "Why are you sorry Shepard?"

"Because last week when I confessed my feelings towards you I was under the impression you liked me as well, obviously this wasn't the case and I just wanted to apologise fo…"

Shepard was cut off by Samara reaching out and placing one finger against his lips, the sudden contact surprised both of them.

"Shepard what you have just said to me now has no purpose in this world" Samara gathered the courage to sit on the edge of Shepard's bed, goddess her heart was pounding in her chest it was amazing Shepard couldn't hear it.

Shepard looked as though he was going to say something but Samara raised her hand and continued.

"John this past week has been as much of a hell for you as it has for me, when you confessed your feelings towards me last week I was not ready to receive them" She paused for a second watching the expression on Shepard's face turn to that of surprise before continuing "Having meditated and journeyed deep into myself I have found that what I said before was lies but also I.." Samara broke off and mumbled.

"Sorry Samara I didn't catch the rest of that; would you be able to repeat it?"

Samara turned and looked into Shepard's eyes and without breaking her gaze she summoned the courage to say what she had always wanted to say.

"John Shepard I love you"