"Oh God..."
He stared at the huge neon sign before him. He should have known... but he didn't. And now he wondered why he didn't. He should have though... after all, his IQ was well over-
"Coming Leonard?"
He swallowed hard. "Um, yeah. I just-."
"What?"
"Oh... nothing."
"Something wrong?"
"No... Let's just go, shall we?"
As they climbed out of the car and walked across the parking lot to the restaurant he turned to her. "Penny, can I ask you something?"
"Sure, what is it?"
"Well... Why did you pick this place?"
For a second she said nothing and a terrifying thought occurred to him. For once more he'd said the wrong thing. But to his surprise she laughed.
"What, The Cheesecake Factory? I work here, silly! Where did you think we were going?"
He laughed nervously and ran his hand through his hair. "I-I really had no idea."
"Oh... Well, if you'd rather go somewhere else, I suppose we could-."
"No, this is fine."
She took his hand and smiled. "Come on then! I know a great table that you'll just love!"
His eyes narrowed. This woman was definitely odd but her beauty far outweighed her strangeness. And if anyone knew about strangeness it was Leonard.
As they entered the restaurant, the blaring music overhead caused him to recoil.
"What is this?" he yelled.
"It's Madonna!" she replied in a normal tone, proving that the music wasn't as loud as he first thought. And when she began dancing to the music, with little regard for anyone, he forgot all about the inconvenience of being in such a revolting restaurant.
"This is a religious song?" He asked.
She smiled, obviously trying not to laugh at him. "Like a Virgin? I think not!"
"But you said Madonna..."
"Yeah, the Grammy winning pop star, not the religious figure!"
When his smile disappeared she took his hand and led him to the host stand where a lively young woman stood wearing a mustard and white colored uniform.
"Oh, hey Penny! What's up?"
"Well this is my neighbor, Leonard. I'm treating him to a meal. Leonard, this is Sandra."
Leonard extended his hand. "Pleased to meet you."
Sandra's eyes widened. "Penny, you know that by meal, they mean-."
"Yeah, yeah, it doesn't matter." Penny said dismissively. Can't a girl do something nice for her neighbor?"
"I guess." Sandra said, heightening Leonard's confusion. But he said nothing.
"Why don't you find a table and I'll be right back?"
"Thanks, Sandra. You're the best!" Penny said. She led Leonard to a rather secluded and dimly lit table, sliding into the booth across from him.
"So, is this okay?"
"Yeah, it's great!" he said, grabbing a menu. "So, what's good here? I mean you should know. You serve the food all day long!"
"Cheesecake." She said simply.
"That's funny." He said with a chuckle. But the chuckle turned into laughter and then near hysterical laughter and pretty soon he couldn't even remember why he was laughing so hard. Suddenly he felt her hand on his arm.
"Are you all right?"
Embarrassed, he picked up his napkin wiping smudges off of his glasses; smudges that weren't even there.
"Oh yeah, I'm fine. I'm sorry. You were saying?"
"Never mind. While you were laughing I went ahead and ordered for us."
"Thanks..." he said rather hesitantly.
"I promise you'll love it. It's the specialty of the house."
"I'm sure it's wonderful." He said, staring dreamily into her eyes.
"So, tell me about yourself."
Leonard shrugged. "There's not much to tell."
"Oh come on... There must be! You and Sheldon are two of the most fascinating people I've ever met!"
"Really?"
"Yeah! Are you kidding me? You're amazing!"
Leonard was astounded. "Me, what about you? You're-."
"A girl from Nebraska who is trying to make it in acting but has had little to no luck at all. That's why I work here and believe me that's the only reason."
"You want to be an actress?"
She sighed dreamily. "More than anything. I've wanted to do this since I was a little girl. My... um... Kurt always thought it was so stupid that I was always going to auditions and so forth but what does he know?"
"I think it's a great ambition." Leonard said.
She lifted her head and looked at him. "You do?"
"Well it's better than being a jerk, like him. I-If you don't mind my saying that."
She groaned. "Oh God, Leonard! I'm so sorry for the way he treated you and Sheldon! I should have never sent you two over there to get my TV!"
"It's all right. We lived through it."
"Why didn't he come?"
"Who?"
"Sheldon. And Howard? And Raj?"
"I don't know... and the stuff that Sheldon said about this being a date... I swear I didn't put him up to that."
Penny smiled. "I know. But thanks, anyway. Oh, look! Our food is here!"
As the waitress sat their meal on the table, Leonard's stomach lurched. Surely this was a joke. But when she began to dig into her food, he realized that it was no joke.
