Authors note: okay, I should have explained this earlier, but I got impatient to publish the first chapter, anyway here goes; this storyline is set in AU where everyone is human (well, more or less), but still following the basic plot of Twilight, albeit with the plot of The Dark Knight and Batman Begins wound through it. So assume all characters who were Vampires and Werewolves (Ok, ok "shape shifters") are now human, but I promise to keep them as close as I can to their original personalities, except when this proves to be impossible (I won't make the Joker act totally like Edward, or vice versa, but I can in enough ways to prove my point). Just remember, this is all in good fun, and should not be taken too seriously. In any case, please, R&R!
PS-This is my first Twilight fan fic, and it is in no way payback for my GF talking me into reading the series. R&R, if you please…
PPS-Quick Character notes; Alice is filling in for Rachel Dawes and Jasper for
Harvey Dent. And yes, Edward's the Joker. Y so srs?
Shortly after The Joker disappeared into the elevator, Charlie had rushed forward from the still panicking crowd and yelled at me to get down.
"Dad, the grenades just a dud…" I protested, fruitlessly it turned out, as he tossed me down to the floor and hunched over me to try and shield me from the direction the grenade seemed to have last been kicked in.
"Seriously, Dad, it's a fake!" I shouted.
"What do you mean?"
"The grenade isn't real Dad. He just threw it because he wanted to panic everyone."
Charlie didn't budge. "It might just have a time delay fuse or something sweetie, we won't know until the bomb squad gets here…but in the mean time, you get up and run for the stairs, I'm going to try and get things calmed down around here."
"Do you need any help?"
"No sweetie, you just get up and run for the exit as soon as I move, ok?"
Charlie stood up, and I made a break for the door…and promptly slipped and fell on the waxed floor.
I scrambled to my feet again and took off in the direction Charlie indicated, kicking off my high heeled shoes as I ran. When I made it to the hallway, I found it was clogged with a pushing, shouting crowd of partygoers.
"Oh boy…" I whispered.
The door looked like it was jammed shut from the other side.
Behind me I heard Charlie shouting over the din, trying to clam things down. By the sound of things, he wasn't having much success. I decided the best thing to do would be to get to a phone and call the police…in case they hadn't already been alerted by the gunfire - or the screams - or the man dressed as bat jumping out the window after the falling woman…
I wandered down the hallway, away from the knot of people by the stairway entrance, trying to find a telephone or cell phone. I opened the door to what turned out to be the master bedroom, and found a portable phone lying on a nightstand.
Just as I dashed across the room to pick it up and dial one of the room's smooth marble walls…opened.
Stopping dead in my tracks, I watched, open-mouthed, as a tall young man with dark skin and short black hair stepped out and tried to smooth his disheveled tuxedo.
It was Jacob Black, the billionaire playboy who owned this penthouse; I hadn't seen him since the Joker and his clowns had crashed the party.
He slipped out of the door, stood up and stopped dead when he saw me.
"Umm…hi," he said at last. "Are they gone?"
Behind him, the wall slid closed.
I didn't respond, too shocked by the wall…and everything else that had just happened…to speak.
"Hey, you okay?" Jacob asked. "You don't look so…"
"What…what the heck was that?" I demanded, pointing at the now closed hidden door.
"My panic room," Jacob answered, smiling nervously.
"Your…panic room?" I asked, incredulously.
"Yeah, it's a safe room for emergencies; you hide in it and…"
"I saw the movie." I barked, cutting him off. I stormed across the room until I was face to face; or close enough…he was taller than he looked.
"You mean to tell me you ran back here and hid in your panic room while the people at your own party were getting terrorized by a lunatic in clown makeup? Oh and they are gone, actually, so it's safe for you to come out now!"
It was Jacob's turn to look surprised,
"I…I…" he stammered, looking like he had something to say but couldn't figure out a way to put it into words, "Yeah. I guess so."
"Unbelievable," I muttered, shaking my head, "You're just lucky Batman showed up when he did! If he hadn't gotten here, that lunatic might have - what are you smiling at?" I demanded; Jacob's face had cracked a mischievous grin.
"Nothing, nothing…it's just…you look…nice when you're angry."
"You…you…you're lucky no one was hurt…" I stopped, suddenly realizing that both Alice Dawes and the Batman had just fallen out of 72nd story window.
"Holy crow!" I yelled, startling Jacob, before turning to run out of the room. I was planning on doing…something. I wasn't sure what, but in any case, I misjudged things a bit and ran smack into the door frame with enough force to send myself falling towards the marble floor.
Suddenly, I stopped.
Strong arms held me steady as someone helped me to my feet.
"You alright?" Jacob Black asked as his muscular arms held my slight frame.
"I think so," I answered. My arm hurt like the devil and I stretched it out and flexed it experimentally. "Yeah, it seems alright…"
"Can I take a look at it? I know a bit of first aid…" Jacob asked while he began investigating my arm without waiting for an answer. He began to carefully feel up along my forearm and elbow, stopping to ask questions once or twice before letting go.
"It seems fine, but you'll have some bruising later on. No extraneous damage done, but you might wanna get it checked out anyway by a professional."
"Thank you…" I looked up at him and saw the sincere concern in his dark eyes, "Look, I'm sorry I blew up on you…"
"No, that's alright. I deserved it," Jacob shook his head. "Why were you going for the door so fast, anyway?"
"The Joker dropped Alice Dawes out of a window and Batman jumped after her…I uh, was going to try and find out what happened I guess."
Jacob smiled, "I guess you'll be glad to know that they both made it down to the ground in one piece…and even stayed that way when they landed. They're alive and well."
I sighed in relief, "Oh good…wait a minute, how did you know that?"
"I uh, have a police scanner in my panic room," Jacob responded sheepishly.
"Okay…"
Suddenly there was the sound of more panic in the hallway, and I looked over to see a squad of Gotham Police SWAT officers pushing their way through the massed crowd by the stairwell entrance and into the penthouse.
"Looks like the cavalry's here," Jacob commented wryly. "Look, could you do me a favor and not mention the panic room to the cops? It's supposed to be a secret."
I shrugged. "Sure. No problem," I'd let the playboy have his secrets; I was sure they weren't that interesting, anyway.
Half an hour later, I was back down to street level and sitting in the back of an ambulance while a paramedic examined my arm.
"Any pain when I do this?" He asked, pushing back on my arm.
"No."
"How about now?" He pulled my arm forward.
"A little."
"Hmm…well Miss Swan, I think you'll be just fine. You're free to go."
"Thank you," I said as I stood up, grabbed my jacket and hand bag, and stepped out the back of the ambulance.
My feet had barely touched the ground before a dark haired woman with a police badge on a chain around her neck came up to me.
"Isabella Swan? I'm detective Anna Ramirez; I was wondering if I could ask you a few questions about what happened tonight."
I shrugged, "Ok. But I don't think I'll be much help…"
The detective smiled encouragingly, "Every little bit information helps, Isabella."
"Bella," I corrected her.
"What?"
"It's just Bella," I said.
"Oh, ok. Well Bella, from the interviews we've done so far we've established that the Joker took you with him to the elevator…"
"Yes," I shivered at the memory, my mind flashing back to the aura of menace, the white make up, the scars, the royal purple overcoat, the painted on red smile…and at the same time, I remembered the bronze hair streaked green by bad hair dye and the striking, warm golden eyes that shone from the black circles painted around his eyes. I tried to shut those thoughts off in a hurry.
"Why?" Anna Ramirez asked.
I shrugged again, "I have no idea. I guess he just wanted a hostage or something."
The detective nodded and wrote something down in her notebook. "Any ideas why he picked you?"
"I have no idea…I think I was just the closest…and I guess he thought I was…pretty," I added, my voice sounding as uncomfortable with the thought as I felt
The detective started to write that down in her notebook but her head jerked up when she fully digested the sentence.
"Excuse me?"
"I know…in his exact words he said I was a babe."
"I…uh…and how did you feel about that?" the detective asked, trying to recover.
"Considering he'd just tossed the last woman at the party he found attractive at the party out of a window, I felt a bit nervous."
Detective Ramirez smiled, "I can see why. Did he say anything else?"
"Uhm…not really," I said, thinking of the Joker card in my handbag.
Detective Ramirez nodded, "Okay, well I have a few more questions for you…"
"Actually, I think that's enough for tonight Detective," Came Charlie's authoritative voice from behind me as well as a set of protective hands on my shoulders.
"But Commissioner Swan…"
"It's alright Detective. I'm sure if she remembers anything else she can find an officer to talk to pretty easily."
The detective smiled slightly before nodding and moving away.
"You alright Bella?" Charlie asked, for what had to be the tenth time tonight.
"I'm fine Dad, really."
"Okay Bella, but if you need someone to talk to, I'm here."
I smiled slightly. During times like these, I really appreciated Charlie. He was protective of me, but not overly so; a truly over protective parent, after their child had just gotten up close to The Joker, would rush them into the most overbearing psycho-therapy money could buy, not caring that the cure would be far worse than the disease, as it were. But Charlie got me. I just needed my space.
"You ready to go home?" he asked.
"You have no idea," I answered, nodding.
After we got in the car, we settled into a comfortable silence, and my thoughts wandered. I thought again of the playing card with the phone number on it tucked in my purse. I wouldn't lie to myself, I was…intrigued. But I wasn't about to call that number. Just because I hadn't told the police about it didn't mean I was interested on taking The Joker up on his offer. Superficial good looks and sense of humor aside, he was a psychopathic mass murderer. He wasn't exactly date-able material.
Which is too bad, really…it's not like I've had too many other offers. Well…at least interesting ones. I shook my head; that was not someplace I wanted to go. Hopefully that was the last I'd see of the Joker until he was arrested.
And then I went back to thinking about those golden eyes of his…
Oh boy.
***
Back at the street outside Jacob Blacks apartment building, Detective Ramirez slipped away from the mass of police and emergency vehicles blocking the street and ducked down an alley.
"Hello…Mr. Emmet?" She called nervously.
A dark chuckle rose out of the shadows, and a huge man dressed in fatigue pants, a black leather jacket and a black hoodie stepped into the faint glow of light off the street. His dark hair was closely cropped, and his handsome face bore a confident smirk.
"Just Emmet, baby doll," he leered.
"Right.' Ramirez growled; just because these mob types were paying her off didn't mean they could talk to her like that.
"You got the info we wanted?" Emmet demanded.
"Yeah…" Ramirez hesitated. She didn't want to do this…
"Look, Detective I can promise you that no one's gonna get hurt because of you. We just wanted to know who the girl was, is all."
Ramirez didn't believe a word of that. But she knew she had to talk, or else.
"The girl's name is Isabella Swan…she goes by Bella, I guess."
"She related to Charlie Swan, the Deputy Police Commissioner?"
"I…yes. She is."
"Huh."
Emmet pulled a ghastly looking clown mask from under his jacket and put it on.
"Well, my boss is going to find that real interesting."
