"England!" said America as he went down the hall, his steps the only thing he could hear.

"England!" said America in the lunch room, hardly able to hear his own voice among the chatter.

"England?" said America to France, who'd escaped detention by being the only one of the bad friends trio who'd done any "sneaking".

"England…" France shrugged at America and joined his search party.

"England, England!" they both said in the English room, hearing the scratch of one solitary pen, the flipping of dictionary pages, and the buzz of fluorescent lights.

"Shhh." said England.

"What are you doing?" whispered America, and France took England's dictionary.

"Rhetorical analysis."

They both shivered dramatically.

"Well." said America. "I have a proposition to make."

"Oh!" said France, very intrigued. "Tell me."

"I'm going to offer England a dowry of twenty bucks to let his Pillow Pet marry Kiku here." whispered America, showing the ladybug.

"Ah." murmured France. "Can I be the wedding planner?"

"Italy already claimed that." said America. "But you two could be partners.

France closed his eyes. "We could be partners."

"Do you have a Pillow Pet."

"No."

"Damn. No one else seems to have one, and we can't have a wedding without bride's maids and a best man!"

"Kumajiro could be the best man." said France. "And maybe some of Japan's big headed anime dolls could be the bridesmaids.

"Oh!" said America, bopping up and down on his toes, very excited to have a wedding.

"You two," said England finally, still looking at his essay. "How does this sound-"

"We don't care." said France.

England sighed and stood up. "Fine. Why are you here?"

America presented Ms. Ladybug to England. "I want my son Kiku to marry your…"

"Son." said England, getting his backpack and taking out a lavender unicorn Pillow Pet.

"A unicorn! Ooh, I knew it." said America. "A purple unicorn. Give me your man card, you're being revoked. You're a girl now."

England rolled his eyes. "Would it be better to have the rainbow unicorn?"

"Yeah, it would be. Robot Rainbow Unicorn is the best, it's a really good game and-"

"We don't care." said England and France at the same time, and then glared at each other.

"Well, anyway, what's his name?"

"My son is named after the two bravest people I know, but one of them is here right now so I can't tell you. But his last name is Magical."

"My dowry is twenty dollars." said America, who was open to negotiation.

"And a movie and dinner."

"Oh." said America and France. America was blushing and France was building a huge gossip story to tell Spain and Prussia.

"Alright." said America with a grin, putting his hand out. England shook it.

America set Kiku on England's essay on the desk, and England put Mr. Magical with him.

"H-hello."said America for Kiku.

"Hello." Mr. Magical's voice sounded like England pretending he had horse lips.

"Are you Mr. Magical?" asked Kiku.

"Yes…" Mr. Magical couldn't meet Ms. Ladybug's eyes without blushing.

"Then that means you're my true love!" said Kiku.

"Brrrr…" said Mr. Magical, who was nickering.

America had to take a moment to laugh at England for nickering.

"Don't be nervous." said Kiku, standing up to offer his front foot to his betrothed. Mr. Magical took it in his pinkish hoof. He felt a little bit more confident, leaning towards Kiku.

France purred in the background as Mr. Magical's narrow eyes gazed into Kiku's and everything was very loud even though there was nothing but the hum of the building and three living bodies. Kiku slid closer to Mr. Magical. After a tense moment, Mr. Magical slid in as well, touching his snout to Ms. Ladybug's lips, which were still spread into a smile, and remained that way as their imaginary lips pressed together in a fairytale kiss. It was a thing to smile about indeed.

They broke the kiss and held paws again, now side by side and pressed together. America wiped a tear from his eye. His son was already in love, and it was only two weeks that Kiku'd entered the family. Now he was joining another family. England's family. England sure had a cute nose. America wondered what movie they would see, and if they would hold hands.

"Isn't it incest if you two look at each other like that." said France loudly. "Because those two are your sons."

"Nobody asked you." said England.

"France, would you babysit them while we go gather the wedding procession?" asked America sweetly, trying to make up for England.

"Sure." he said.

England and America began to leave and France started to reposition the Pillow Pets.

"If they lose their virginity before the wedding, so help me France." said England. France put them back to leaning on each other, with a pout.


one more on its way