Two days passed and Liz hadn't spoken to Tom except for a phone call here and there checking on Agnes. Truth be told she still hadn't figured out what she was going to do, and her behavior had become noticed by the team. She was going through reports when Ressler came in and gave her a knowing look before he sat down.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
She sighed and put her pen down before she looked up at him. "Tom left, we had a disagreement and he basically told me to choose between my life now as it is or him."
Don nodded and looked at her.
"Well I'm not a very good person to give relationship advice but I think you should do what you think is best for you and Agnes."
Liz nodded and glanced at her paperwork before she bit her lip.
"At one point and time I thought I knew what that was, but not I'm not so sure."
He stood up and walked to her door and opened it before he shot her a small smile and tried to lighten to mood.
"The offer to rough him up a bit is still on the table."
She laughed a little and he winked before he left her to be alone with her own thoughts again.
When afternoon came, she had decided to go talk with Reddington about the pending decision. She wasn't so sure what to expect and truth be told she felt a little nervous about the whole thing. Standing at his safe house door she frowned a bit when she received no answer and then realized that his sedan wasn't there either. Puzzled she walked back to her car. She knew that he wasn't out of town because she had remembered Cooper saying that he was taking the week to recoup after the ordeal with Kirk.
Halfway back to her makeshift apartment an idea hit her and against better judgement twenty minutes later she found herself across the street from his Bethesda flat. Turning her car off she noticed that indeed there were two lights on, and if memory served her correctly it was his kitchen and living room lights that were on. After a few minutes, she took a deep breath trying to ignore the fact that this was probably his most private space and he may not be too happy about her just showing up.
Liz walked up the steps and stopped at his doorway hearing light classical music coming from inside and raised her hand and knocked softly. As soon as her hand came back down to rest at her side she immediately started to feel even more anxious about being there and wondered if she had enough time to turn around and get back to her car. Before she could even think about turning around she heard the deadbolt and then there he was standing in the doorway looking surprised to see her. She took in his appearance which was different than she was used to. He hadn't shaved and had at least two days' worth of stubble, and stood clad in jeans that hugged him in all the right places and a black t-shirt.
"Lizzie…"
It had come out as more of a question than anything else and she immediately found herself babbling away.
"I went to your safe house and you weren't there, and I couldn't find Dembe so I was headed home but then I realized you might be here when Cooper told me that you were taking a few days off to rest."
His eyes widened a little but his face held no other expression. She was relieved when he took a step back and motioned for her to come inside. Glancing around a little she noted how warm and cozy the flat was compared to the other times she had been there. He had the fireplace lit, the music turned up just enough for it to be heard, and his cat was asleep curled up on the couch next to a book he must have been reading when she knocked.
"What's wrong Lizzie?"
Turning she looked at him and honestly had no idea where to start at. Seemingly knowing she needed a few moments he walked over and poured a second glass of wine and handed it to her before having her come and sit next to him on the couch. She took a long drink and then sighed relaxing a little bit before she glanced back up at him.
"Tom and I had an argument and I'm just not sure what to do. He….he told me that he didn't want to raise our family here in this environment and he wants to move away and start over."
Red nodded and she could have sworn she saw his eye twitch just barely but she couldn't be sure.
"And you've come here because you don't want to be alone?"
She gripped her glass and then set it down on the coffee table.
"No…I…" Liz took a deep breath and then looked back at him again.
"I came here because I don't know what or who to choose. I'm at a place where after everything that's happened my life should be calmed down and finally normal but it's not."
His face changed a little in confusion and he faced her more.
"Lizzie I'm slightly confused, who to choose as in referring to Tom and whom?"
Liz bit her lip.
"As in choosing to have Tom stay or choosing to have him leave and me stay here….with you."
Reds eyes widened a bit but the nodded.
"I see…" He paused for a few seconds before he made a clicking noise with his tongue.
"Lizzie if you believe that your life is better suited, and you're family is better off leaving here then as much as I hate to say this I think you should go."
He stood up and she watched as he walked over to the mantle and looked at a few of the photos.
"Your daughter deserves the best out of life as do you. I remember sitting there one night, I couldn't sleep I knew I was leaving for assignment the next morning. With no idea for how long, or where I would end up. She cried when I told her I was going away for just a little while, put her little hands on my cheeks and begged me to stay. Told me that she loved me repeatedly, and that she would miss me too much if I left. She ended up falling asleep in my arms and I carried her upstairs to bed and tucked her in and whispered how much I loved her."
He paused and Lizzie wondered if he was alright and stood up and took a few steps towards him but then he spoke again.
"Those are moments that as a parent you cherish and hold onto. In dark moments where you're not sure where to go or what to grasp onto those memories are what pushes you to hold on just a little while longer."
Turning she was surprised to see he had unshed tears in his eyes as he looked at her.
"Those are memories I want you to have with your daughter Elizabeth. I want you to be able to sit down and tell her about all those moments when she's older. I couldn't keep my own family safe and I know now that I was naive when I told you I could keep you safe and protect you. The only thing I can promise you is that I will try to do everything in my power to protect you and your daughter if you choose to stay. But I also want you to know that if you choose to leave with Tom and start over, I will accept the fact that you did what you thought was vital for you and your family to be happy."
Lizzie had no words to respond to him and it wasn't until he broke eye contact with her and walked over to pick up his glass that she could physically move. Slowly sitting back down she looked at her hands and ran her fingertips along the lines of her scar. She swallowed hard and didn't raise her head to look at him as she spoke again, her voice barely a whisper.
"Tom told me on more than one occasion that….that my father was still alive. I've constantly listened as he as well as other have hinted on something and I'm going to ask you a question and I don't care about anything else that has happened I just want a one hundred percent honest answer from you Reddington because I need to know."
Red's cheek twitched but after a few seconds he nodded and sat next to her. She finally lifted her head and looked at him and let out a slow shaky breath.
"Sam raised me…he was my father and nothing will ever change that. But I know now about your relationship with my mother, I read her diary, I've heard rumors and I…I need to know…are you biologically my father?"
His gaze didn't falter nor did his voice, and for the first time she finally received more answers than she had ever gotten from him before.
"No, I am not your biological father. Your mother and I did have a relationship of sorts, I was an assignment she was given as an attempt to gain information and bring down our government. Kirk was an assignment as well. But, your mother was actually in love with another man with whom she worked with."
He took a deep breath.
"I had uncovered information on what you know now as the Cabal back when I was in a special operations unit. After nearly two years of digging, being used by Katerina, and talking with the right people I reached out to Leonard Caul who I had been working with under the radar. We came to an agreement that we needed to keep the information confidential and contained within our group which consisted of four people at the time. With his help the Fulcrum was created but back then I wasn't as observant as I am today. Katerina knew about the Fulcrum and stole it. I knew that I had to get it back before she could take the information to her handler and start another cold war. Our team showed up, the plan seemed perfect and she'd never even know it was gone, but Kirk was there arguing with her after somehow finding out about our affair, and she had been tipped off about us coming for the Fulcrum by your father. He showed up with his men to support her and found out she'd been with not just me but also Kirk and everything went to hell. "
Red turned his head and looked at her.
"Your father died that night Lizzie; I know because I saw his body when you were being extracted from the fire."
She hadn't even noticed that she had been crying until he reached over and gently wiped her cheeks with his thumbs. Leaning over she instantly buried her face in his chest and let herself cry feeling safe in his arms, and finally getting answers she had been yearning for.
