Wow! To everyone who has followed, reviewed, and added this story to their favorites, thank you a million times over! I honestly was not expecting this story to get as much praise as it already has in the first chapter. I really believed it would be shot down and I was not expecting to even write a second chapter to it. You have no idea how thrilled I am that you all like it so far. I will definitely try to keep up on this one, but as I said before, this story is purely just for fun and I'm using it as an outlet for when I am having trouble writing my main SwanQueen story.

With that in mind, if there is anything you guys want to see happen, please let me know! I can definitely make it happen in this particular fic since it has no strings attached. I am always willing and ready to do some prompts!


Swan Zero Point Five

With a sly smirk and her hand wrapped tightly around one of Emma's arms, Regina dragged the blonde, who was donning a black bathrobe, into the sitting room where her father, David, and Zelena were all lazing around. They were either reading or studying by the hearth. "Father, I found an intruder in our bathing chambers," the brunette announced, shoving Emma forward.

Henry glanced up from his book, a blush quickly running to his cheeks as he slammed the book shut. "Ah, a beautiful one at that!" he exclaimed with joy. He rushed to the two of them. "What is your name, young lady?"

Emma twitched and stepped back, feeling uncomfortable by the sudden closeness of the older man. "Like I said," she snipped, glaring at Regina, "I am Emma!"

Regina's father laughed lightheartedly and said, "That's impossible, sweetie. Emma is a man…though he does have a very feminine name."

Even Regina and Zelena were a bit queasy at the fact their father was attempting to hit on a woman close to their own age, but it hadn't been the first time. "Here we go," Zelena mumbled, not bothering to look up from her book.

David cleared his throat and announced, "Actually, that is Emma. She's really a girl."

Zelena and Henry both dropped their jaws. Regina quickly let go of the blonde's arm and blushed heavily. "What?!" she exclaimed, "How is that possible?!"

"Same way I was cursed," Emma's father replied nonchalantly with a shrug of his shoulders.

"Yes, you never did explain how exactly that happened, Charming," Henry reminded him.

Emma huffed and crossed her arms. "He's a moron," she accused, "That's how this happened."

"Hey!" David shot back, obviously offended.

"Ever since my mother ran away, my father has been training me to be a 'knight' because he didn't have a son," the blonde spat, "And now I see the reason he was so upset about that. I'm apparently not good enough!" She smacked David in the back of his head, causing him to flinch. "So, we were training in the Dark Woods, trying to get stronger. Well, someone didn't read up on what to watch out for in that particular forest. Apparently, in the center of the Dark Woods, there's a series of haunted springs. My dear father fell into one and turned into a jackass. I find it fitting. So, what does he do? He kicks me into another spring, and I come out as a man!" Emma let out a furious growl.

"You mean, you've never heard of the haunted springs?" Zelena scoffed, "How unfortunate. Legend says that thousands of years ago, various people and animals drowned in those springs. Whichever spring you fall in, you're cursed to turn into whatever drowned in that spring whenever you're splashed with cold water. The only way to turn back is to be doused with hot water."

Regina started to giggle, but it turned into a full blown laugh, earning her strange looks. When she realized she was being stared at like a crazy person, the brunette stopped. "What?" she questioned, "Don't you understand what this means?" Everyone shook their heads. "It means that I don't have to marry anyone because this man doesn't have a son," she explained, relief in her tone.

Panic flooded Henry's features when he figured out this meant he didn't have an heir. Then an idea lit up in his head like a light bulb. "Wait! Emma can stay as a man, right?" he inquired, "So that she…er…he can marry my Regina!"

"Hell no!" Emma rejected the idea immediately, her forehead wrinkled with disbelief.

"Daddy!" Regina snapped, "I don't need to marry anyone to be the heir to your fortune! Especially not someone like… Emma."

The blonde opened her mouth, suddenly feeling offended. "Excuse me? What the hell makes you think I even want to marry an ugly and rude girl like you?"

Regina's eyes grew wide. No one had every spoken to her like that in her life. Her nostrils flared and her teeth showed as she grabbed the collar of Emma's bathrobe before she began to glow purple. Before anyone could stop her, Emma was launched off with a blast of magic. The blonde crashed clear through a stone wall causing grey dust to come up from the destruction. Regina harrumphed, crossing her arms and throwing her nose into the air. "Jerk," she spat.

"Whoa!" David exclaimed, "You're a magic user! Emma is too! You will be perfect for each other." He ran over to the hole in the wall and prodded his daughter in her side with his boot. "From now on, you will speak to your fiancé with respect!"

Emma groaned and threw her middle finger up, mumbling, "Screw you…"


The next morning came early, especially for Emma, who had spent most of the night repairing the giant hole in Mr. Mills' wall. Of course she didn't feel it was her place to fix it since it was Regina who sent her through it, but her father's reasoning was that she shouldn't have set her future wife off. Henry's excuse was that she was to be the 'man of the house' one day and would end up doing things like this anyways, so she had better get used to it early. Emma thought it was bullshit. She wasn't even a man, not really.

She awoke to a cold splash of water over her head and the sound that came from her mouth would have been high pitched had her vocal chords not changed in an instant. "What the hell?!" she bellowed out, scowling at the assailant, David.

"Time to get up, son," David chimed cheerfully.

Emma clenched a fist, gritting her teeth, fighting the urge to punch her father square in the face. "What's the big idea, Pops? It's not like we're training! Why do we have to be up so early? And I'm not your son! I'm your freakin' daughter!" Of course the last statement sounded hilarious coming from her deep male voice.

"You need to start fulfilling your new duties as Regina's fiancé," David explained, a smug look on his face, "You're going to escort the nice girl to her tutoring session. Also, starting tomorrow, you will be joining her in those sessions."

"Hah!" the blonde snorted, "Nice girl? You can't be serious about all this. For one, she's not nice. Far from it, actually. She tried to kill me! And second of all, I'm being forced to marry a crazy woman and now I'm being forced to go to school, too?!"

"A good education is necessary," David continued with arms crossed, "And she is nice. She was just showing affection. Besides, you shouldn't have provoked her." After Emma let out a long agonizing sound of displeasure, he pulled her up. "Now get dressed and be nice."

Once her annoying father had finally left, Emma began getting dressed. It looked like today would be a boy day since she was being rushed and would hardly have time to heat up some water. She threw on a pair of loose fitting navy blue cotton pants and red leather vest that fit snug to her torso. The vest was only something Emma wore when she was in male form. She left her muscular and toned arms bare, aside from some brown leather bracers on her forearms. After she slipped into a pair of black boots and pulled her hair back, Emma was ready to head out.

The blonde made her way to Regina's room and knocked gently on the door. She was certainly not looking forward to this. Emma didn't want to forgive her father for all the shit he got them both into, but she knew she couldn't blame him. After her mother vanished from their lives, David went a little bit nuts.

"Come in," Regina called out softly. She was expecting anyone else other than the person who stepped through the doorway. Regina caught the reflection of the blonde masculine figure in one of the many mirrors sitting in front of her. Her gentle expression hardened as she finished braiding her long raven hair.

"Wow," Emma spoke softly, taking in the view of the room. There were mirrors on every wall as if Regina had a slight obsession. "Looks like someone is a bit obsessed with themselves," she commented, not really caring whether it was rude or not.

"Can I help you, Miss Swan?" the brunette quipped before standing and turning around. Regina sported a baby blue corduroy jacket that came down longer in the back than it did in the front. The jacket had five buttons of matching color just beneath her chest and a popped collar that sprout up from where the buttons lay. Her legs, which even Emma could not deny were a nice shape, were covered by a pair of tight fitting tan cloth pants. She wore knee high dark brown leather boots that zipped up on the sides. "Or should I call you Mister Swan?" she queried due to Emma's current state.

The blonde cocked her head and rolled her eyes before placing her hand on a hip. The feminine pose did not do Emma's male body any justice. "Emma will be just fine," she replied with an annoyed sigh, "I have to walk you to class, apparently." She took in the other woman's appearance, scanning her from head to toe, trying not to appear as if she were checking Regina out. "Planning to go on an adventure?" Emma asked with a quirked brow.

"I am going riding after my tutoring session," Regina replied, dark eyes following the movement of the blonde's. "Shall I write out my weekly schedule since you're apparently my new babysitter?" she jeered.

"Sorry I asked," Emma feigned an apology before continuing with, "Let's just get this over with…quickly."

Regina gave a curt nod before grabbing some leather gloves that she would need for later and walked out with Emma following close behind. They only made it about five feet out of the front door before the pair was interrupted in their journey. A man dressed in a complete set of leather armor stood in their path. He was very handsome in the face donning a short, but scruffy beard and mustache. His curly hair was a medium shade of brown and cut short. The man's dark blue eyes peered at Regina with adoration. In his hands, he held a large bouquet of red roses.

"Regina Mills," he spoke with a deep accented voice. The man dropped down to both knees before Regina, regardless of whether the ground was still muddy due to the previous night's rain. "Please, accept this gift as a token of my love for you," he begged, shoving the flowers towards her.

"Huntsman, for the thousandth time, no!" Regina yelled out in frustration. For once, she would love to go through a day without this idiot, among others, throwing themselves at her. She began to walk around him, but the man grabbed her wrist to stop her.

"I understand, my love," the Huntsman remarked as he rose to his feet, "You love me so much that it hurts. One day it won't hurt anymore, and we can love each other forever."

"Graham!" she shouted, a vein beginning to pop up on her forehead, "The answer will always be no!"

"You're only saying that because you want to spare me the pain, but I assure you, Regina Mills, I can take it," Graham pleaded.

"Hey, asshole!" Emma stepped in, placing a firm hand on the Huntsman's chest, giving him a push back, "The lady would appreciate it if you would leave her the hell alone."

Regina held a hand up to Emma and gave a threatening glare to the blonde. "Mis-…Mister Swan," she began, having enough respect to not out Emma's little secret, "I am perfectly capable of handling myself."

"Just who the hell are you?" Graham questioned the blonde, his face scrunched up angrily.

A smug grin swept over Emma's lips and she removed her hand from Graham's chest. She was about to piss them both off, but she didn't care because she was about to get revenge on Regina for her little stunt from last night. Emma slinked one arm around the brunette's waist and pulled her close so that their hips were touching. "I am her fiancé," she announced proudly.

Unbeknownst to the party of three, David had been watching from a nearby bench. Internally, he screamed like a little girl with joy. Emma had announced it, which to him, made it official. They would never have to live another day without money or food.