do not own Naruto. All rights belong to Masashi Kishimoto.

Warning No Beta

Chapter Two

Sakura picked dejectedly at her lunch, half-mindedly skimming some financial and medical papers as she tried her best to find the least-wilted piece of broccoli- the hospital cafeteria needed a serious makeover.

When she was finally starting to make a dent in the day's work, the door to her office soon flew open, where she found a very tired, angry and slightly ripe Shizune standing, face slightly flushed with heat as she fanned her face with her clipboard.

Sakura shot the woman an amused, questioning glance as she promptly slammed the door behind her.

"Room ten." Shizune groaned, stuffing a pair of latex gloves into her lab coat and dragging a hand through her choppy brown locks, "I have no idea what happened tonight but we're going to have to start doubling-up."

"Seriously?" Sakura hummed, looking up from the stack of paperwork currently overflowing from her desk. "Didn't we just hire like… three new medics?"

"They hardly know how to find a vein," The older woman sighed, falling into the uneven, wooden chair that sat in front of Sakura's desk with a long-suffering groan, "I don't know what we're going to do. Aren't these supposed to be times of peace?"

"That's relative." Sakura snorted, pushing around the steamed veggies in her bowl, "We're supposed to be getting some transfers from the academy soon, apparently people think this is a lucrative field nowadays."

Shizune snorted back in response, staring at the wall clock with darkened eyes, "I'm serious. What are we supposed to do? We've got half the kids in the village occupying the first floor with the flu, some adults too, three rooms literally packed to the brim with chunnin's and the ICU is literally at capacity. At this rate I wouldn't be surprised if the new interns didn't last another week- and honestly that's being hopeful."

"I let Tsunade know, she said she'd see if she could try and bring up the construction of another wing up at the next council meeting but…" Sakura grumbled, "You know how they are."

"Stingy bastards." Shizune hissed as the pager in her pocket began sounding, she examined it for a moment before throwing her head back with a groan, "Kami, my feet are killing me."

"Here." Sakura chuckled, pushing the half-eaten bowl of veggies across the desk, "I'll take over, just try to take a look at last month's statements."

"Owe you one," Shizune smiled through a mouthful of cauliflower, tossing the still-beeping pager Sakura's way.

"Damn right." She grinned, pulling her lab coat around her shoulders and making her way into the hall. Nurses pushed and pulled every which way the the climb to the fourth floor was an obstacle course of worried friends and family and overworked medical staff, the state the hospital was in was nearly unacceptable and she knew that, but until she finished her proposition in formal writing it couldn't even be suggested to the council.

She was almost certain they were just stalling.

"Kaito?" She called, gently wrapping her knuckles against the door a few times before popping her head inside, "It's doctor Haruno."

Six beds faced her as she entered, three per wall pressed parallel to her sides, the privacy curtain obscuring some, but the rhythm of even heart monitors assured her they were fine for the time being, she'd let them rest.

A Jonin she'd not met before popped out from behind one of the curtains, a brown-haired woman with Inuzuka clan markings and dark eyes stood to attention- a little worse for wear, but intact.

"He's right here." She assured, leading the pinkette down to the last bed near the wall on her right, where a younger looking man- maybe seventeen- laid silently, brown eyes focused intently on the ceiling. He had a head of curly blonde hair and an out-of-place scowl on such a cherub-like face.

"Thank you." Sakura nodded, motioning for the Jonin to step outside of the space as she drew the privacy curtain shut around the bed. The woman looked reluctant to leave but Sakura offered her what she hoped was an assuring smile, shooing her playfully- not really- out of sight.

"We were worried for a second there, Kaito." Sakura smiled, roving her green-glowing palm around his skull, "Does your head hurt?" She questioned, flashing her pen-light through his vision, his pupils reacted quickly and his eyes were able to follow the pen-tip with quick precision. So not concussed, thankfully.

The man- or was boy more appropriate? He was only a few years her junior- shook his head somewhat stiffly- which was to be expected after two days incapacitated.

"That's good," She nodded, softly rolling the cotton sheet down to his waist and raising his top, examining the gash stretching from his pelvis to the length of his sternum, it would leave an ugly scar but the stitch work was immaculate and had the circumstances been different, she would have beamed at the sight.

"Any pain in your abdomen?" She questioned, probing the muscle beneath, fixing a few nicks and tears as she did so, brow crinkling slightly at the boy's ever somber expression, "Is something the matter?"

The boy's head turned ever-so-slightly to focus an almost humorous glare her way, "Yeah, it hurts. I was gutted, why do you guys ask such stupid questions?"

"God damn it, Kaito!" The Jonin hissed, resurfacing from behind the privacy curtain- where she had been standing since being told to leave- face red and fists clenched as she hurriedly flooded the room with a string of long-suffering apologies to the pink haired medic.

Somewhat embarrassed and feeling awkward, Sakura waved the woman down, "Really, it's fine." She assured, brows knitted tightly as she turned to face the young blonde now bursting at the seams with what appeared to be a mix of annoyance and exhaustion.

"He's always like this," The Jonin sighed, shooting the boy a dark look as she stood between the pinkette and her charge, "I apologize on his behalf, Doctor Haruno."

Sakura would have felt more awkward, had the boy not been mouthing the woman's words in unison mockingly behind her back. It just made for a humorous and strangely familiar situation. She tried her best, and failed, to siffle her chuckles behind her clipboard, giving the blonde boy a playful tap on the head with it's hard surface.

"Looks like you're in good condition if you're well enough to be a brat, I'll leave you to it." She smiled as the pager in her pocket began to vibrate once again, "I've got a very important date in the clinic anyway."

The rest of her shift was a mixture of grueling hours compounding remedies for the horrific stomach flu circulating around the village children and minor check-ups and discharges of some of the shinobi patients- they never stayed longer than they needed, it seemed. Something that she was for once, grateful of. Civilians were an entirely different story.

When she was finally back in her apartment, and cleaned of the days grit and grime, she could feel an entirely new set of calluses dancing around the base of her feet and couldn't seem to shake off the stiffness in her limbs.

A soft wrap at her balcony doors made her jump, feeling slightly ashamed for not sensing the oncoming presence, but too tired to care. She shifted the curtains and sighed as Sai's eerie smile, he motioned to a brown paper bag in his hands, steaming slightly in contrast to the icy air, and she suddenly felt more compelled to welcome him into her home.

"Why don't you change into your winter gear?" She sighed as she pressed a hand to the exposed flesh at his abdomen, it tightened and flexed under her touch, she let out a small laugh as he shrugged and placed the bag down on her coffee table, "From Shizune?"

Sai nodded, sliding his anbu mask along the side of his head and rooting around through the bag a moment before pulling out a small styrofoam box and a pair of wooden chopsticks.

"You need a kotatsu."

"I don't have that many guests." She sighed, she could smell the braised tofu and the garlicky bite of kimchi, to which her stomach growled in response, when was the last time she ate a meal that wasn't pre-packaged and lukewarm?

Sai muttered something under his breath and sat cross legged on the other side of her coffee table, stuffing a few dumplings into his mouth with mild interest as she spooned a few generous portions of tofu into her mouth, it was warm and savory.

"The brown-haired woman-"

"Shizune, Sai, her name is shizune."

"She said that she needed someone to run an errand for you, why didn't you just pick up something to eat on your way home?"

"Guess I forgot."

"If you don't eat you will not perform well at your duties."

"I'm a medic, Sai. I know."

He just responded with silence, flipping through a well-worn sketchbook as he ate. His dark eyes swirling with interest as they quickly scanned each page. She studied him as he studied his art, unusually serene. Maybe due to lack of sleep and the exhaustion of her body, whichever it was she wasn't sure.

"Why do you come here so often?" Sakura questioned, resting her cheek in her hand as she studied Sai's expression- what little of it there was- her empty box of food sat forgotten on the table as his book shut with a snap.

"I like it here. It's too quiet at my place." He said, simply.

"It isn't quiet at mine?" She questioned, incredulously.

"It is, but it's a nice kind of quiet." He added, brows scrunching slightly, "It feels less lonely than mine."

She smiled softly, patting the top of his head affectionately.

He closed his eyes and leaned into the touch. She forgot, at times, how starved of companionship Sai must have been in ROOT. She couldn't imagine how hard it had been to semi-integrate back into normal society, team seven was really the only friendship he knew.

"Do you miss the Uchiha?" Sai asked, suddenly, scanning her eyes for signs of discomfort or anger, face falling slightly as she withdrew her hand. She crossed her legs and lit a cigarette, back resting against the couch as she stared skyward, brow scrunched in thought.

"Not… not like I used to. I worry sometimes, if he's okay out there on his own, but… I guess it's silly to do that. He's lived like that for most of his life, I guess I should be more worried about him when he's home."

"Ah." Sai nodded, laying across the length of the coffee table, resting a hand on her thigh, his thumb swiping soft circles into the tender flesh.

She smiled and gave his shoulders a squeeze, "You're going on a mission soon, aren't you?"

"Hm?" He hummed in response, still massaging her thigh as his forehead rested against the surface of the small table.

"You're not usually this touchy, not that I'm complaining."

"It's nice to be physical with you."

"Yeah."

They sat in silence for a long while, and once again she didn't mind.

"Why didn't you go with him?"

"Huh?"

"The Uchiha, he asked you, didn't he? To accompany him."

"Why all the questions?" She sat up, smothering the cigarette in a nearby ashtray as she took Sai's face in her hands. He stared back at her, unblinking, his face it's usual portrait of curious innocence.

"I just thought you would, I was curious, is all."

"Jealous?" She smiled, squishing his cheeks together for emphasis.

He clutched her forearms, kneeling forward to lean a few inches from her face, his version of a playful smirk dancing along his pale features, "Incredibly so."

She couldn't remember when Sai had figured out sarcasm, but it oddly suited him.

He bent forward to brush his lips against hers, to which she smiled.

"I said no because I had no place in his journey." She sighed, lighting another cigarette and falling onto her side, gently toying with the hair framing Sai's face.

"That's fair." He nodded, scooting around the table to lay his head against her stomach. She wrapped an arm around his shoulders and sighed.

"Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I'd gone and just played along, I mean, it's what I thought I wanted, but I guess I knew I didn't. I mean- can you picture me as a housewife? Popping out little Uchiha babies and living in that big compound all on my own?"

Sai snorted against her top, and she laughed along with him.

He accompanied her for a couple hours, confirming that yes- he would be leaving for a mission tomorrow. He always seemed to stay long enough for her to fall asleep, always gone when she woke up. Once again, in the wee hours of the morning. It was three AM, and she was suddenly very cold.

She wondered if to other people her relationship with the pale artist could be considered romantic, and she concluded that if anyone who didn't the know the man saw them curled up in her home sharing small chaste kisses, absolutely. But she knew the man better than most anyone could boast, and she knew it was to him what it was to her. A very deep and complicated friendship.

He didn't have the emotional capacity to truly love her, but he craved love and affection. She, with her selfishness coupled with her medic heart, would happily give that to him no-strings attached. Neither had ever even entertained the thought that one day they'd be speaking of love. He was a beloved friend and she would always welcome him happily- but that was about the extent her mind would allow her to wander.

A few hours passed and though her body was now warmed, something inside her exuded a deep chill, more so than any outside the walls of her apartment could supply. She knew she should probably get over it, gather up her feelings and shove them into some deep place within her mind to rot, if only to keep everyone together. Sasuke ultimately decided he couldn't stay within village walls was enough to permanently change the dynamic of her team, what else could have brought her and Naruto together more than the shared goal of bringing their teammate back from the edge of insanity and 'rescuing' him? His final decision was a low blow, and it took a very long time for either of them to truly accept it. She thinks that Naruto still held- and maybe holds- hope that one day he'll make peace with himself and confide himself within Konoha's walls.

She doubted it. She'd never seen Sasuke look more anxious and… broken, than she had within the safe walls of her hometown. He belonged out in the world, she knew that. She understood his decision and, for once, respected his wishes. Why Naruto thought he'd want to pass the empty Uchiha compound every day, with whatever ghosts of his past that danced inside, she would never know.

"Haruno-San."

"Just a moment." She called to the anbu patiently waiting outside of her door, the chakra was familiar to her, but not enough for her to even guess at which one had been sent to her home. Whoever they were, they usually guarded the Hokage tower, so it was probably a summons from her mentor.

She popped a few of her tablets into her mouth, allowing them to cycle semi-naturally through her system as she wrapped a shawl around her shoulders and made her way to the door, mussing slightly with her bed head as she opened it to see a tall owl-faced shinobi staring down at her, oddly enough, mission scroll in hand.

"You've got to be kidding!" She exclaimed, hastily snatching the scroll from the now anxiously stiff anbu's gloved fingers.

"The hospital is understaffed as it is, what is the meaning of this?" She hissed, more to herself than anyone else. Her companion was obligated not to speak ill of the decisions of higher-ups, but Sakura most certainly wasn't.

"Those old bastards." She sighed, defeated. "You can go. I'll show myself to the tower."

"Certainly." Owl nodded, making an awkward descent down the steps of her building as she disappeared behind her roughly slammed door.

When she arrived in Tsunade's office, throwing the crumbled scroll onto her overburdened desk, a string of curses that would make a sailor blush practically rocked the entire floor.

"There's no way I can do this, shishou, Shizune is at her breaking point." Sakura cried, pacing along the dusty carpeting.

"God damn it." Tsunade sighed, rubbing her brow and pouring herself her morning glass of sake, probably much earlier than usual.

"You have to do something, we've got interns coming soon, Shizune can't oversee them and the hospital all at once."

"We have other doctors… I'll just have to move things around, god damn it, fuck."

"You can't be serious."

"I don't have a say, unfortunately." She sighed, "It's got six signatures. I can't even over rule this with majority vote."

"Fuck."

"That mission was supposed to go to team eight… but, you know." Tsunade grumbled, waving her free hand through the air for emphasis.

"Yeah." Sakura scowled, rooting around her lab coat.

"No smoking in my office."

"Shishou-"

"It's a dirty habit." The blonde scowled, nose scrunched in distaste.

Sakura dropped down into her chair, leaning forward onto her knees, "What is there to possibly see in Ame? The whole village is practically a cesspool now that the Akatsuki isn't bringing in revenue to keep it running. The place has been scoured hundreds of times now, what is there even left to look for?

"They said there's some copycat organization trying to take root there, it's just a scouting mission- again, I don't know why you're being sent for reconocense. Doesn't really suit your style."

Sakura sank lower in her seat, exhausted, anxious and annoyed. "I hate that they get to just avoid all of the village's problems because they're too old to care about the next generation."

"I know, Sakura. Never wanted this job, wasn't built for it." Tsunade frowned into her glass, "I'm just biding time at this point, the next generation of clan heads is almost ready to step up- hell, Shikaku is practically shoving Shikamaru in his place by force. Lazy bastard."

"This is horse shit." Sakura grumbled, feeling defeated and sick.

"We'll just have to figure something out until you're back, I'll take a few shifts if I can, we'll make it work."

"Is this a bad time?" A third voice emerged from the doorway, Shikamaru stood, jonin vest slung over his arm, eyes half-lidded and bagged as he took in the two red-faced women, looking like one was about to bust a vein and the other was about to rip her desk in half.

"No, come in, and shut the door behind you, will you? You're letting out the heat." Tsunade grumbled dismissively, not really in the mood to deal with any of this right now.

Shikamaru nodded and closed the door behind him, keeping a reasonable distance from the two as he came forward, mission details clutched in his free hand. He looked nearly as beaten down as Sakura and she guessed the field shinobi were getting a lot of action recently as well. She supposed that the sheer amount of injured shinobi she'd been treating should have been an indication of that. There isn't much time to ponder when you're sewing people back together, she supposed.

"First question," Shikamaru sighed, "What the fuck is this?"

After a general debriefing and mutual alliance of aggravation was hashed out Sakura found herself elbow-deep in another chunin's chest. It was an unusually complicated and annoying surgery when one had almost no chakra to spare, she discovered.

A whole squadron had come back nearly eviscerated and one on death's doorstep, hell- death was inviting them inside for drinks when she finally started working on him. Three nurses that had been there for no less than thirteen hours had finally gotten to go home and royally fucked the rotation, Sakura had pulled a triple shift and there was no sign that tomorrow would be any better.

When she left the hospital that night, she was practically running on empty and spitting pure rage. She was nearly daring someone to start a brawl with her on her tredge home, chakra-drained or not, she was open to a bare-fisted fight just to relieve the tension in her jaw alone.

Every team that she'd seen in the last few weeks had the same story- normal mission gone awry when a random group of nuke nin attacked. There was a blaringly obvious connection, but no one seemed to be looking into it. None of the stories were consistent with one specific group but Sakura was loathe to believe several groups of ninja had suddenly decided to make Konoha ninja a target. They were allied to nearly every remaining village and if the defectors were so damn wired to fight- it would make more sense for them to attack their own squads.

Nothing was adding up- and that was nearly worse than the never ending shit-show at the hospital.

"Hey, Haruno-san!"

She could hear the galloping feet behind her and preyed it wasn't a summons back to the hospital, she didn't know how much longer she could stay conscious if she pushed herself any farther, and she didn't really want 'passed out during surgery' on her resume.

"I've been looking for you." A bear-faced anbu remarked, and if the shaggy dark hair was any indication, it was her almost-date from a few days prior.

"I know the last time I tried it kind of went horrible, so… why don't you let me take you out? I know this little place a few streets over, the tea is incredible-"

"I've got a better idea." She breathed, the tension in her shoulders releasing slightly as she softly clutched the man's hand, giving it an encouraging squeeze, "I know a place not far from here, a shitty little apartment complex. I'm sure I could find something for you to eat."

As she tugged him down a shortcut through a narrow, darkened alley way, she tugged his mask high enough to reveal a smirk placed over beautifully sculpted lips, "Sounds perfect, I'm starving."

When all was said and done, when she was once again alone and wiping work and sex-induced sweat from her lithe frame, the taste of a barely acquainted anbu and clove cigarettes on her tongue, she wondered if she was as fucked up as she felt.

He'd happily sated her hunger for release, many times over, she couldn't help but feel numb. Her limbs heavy with exhaustion and empty stomach curling. She knew this night would only end with her chain-smoking to relieve the grumbling in her stomach and falling into an uneasy and restless sleep. She'd been reliving this routine for months.

There would be no Sai to lull her to sleep tonight, and she wasn't sure if she'd see him again before she left- she probably wouldn't. Maybe she should have invited her anbu friend to stay the night, she didn't want to give the wrong impression. Though, she was sure he understood what their time together would be. In the world they lived sex was little more than mostly socially-accepted therapy.

She hummed silently in the dimly lit bathroom, to a tune she remembered vaguely and didn't care to think too much on. She examined herself in the bathroom mirror. She was a vision in white, paled by the cloudy winter skies and time spent indoors in the hospital, dark circles spanned beneath her eyes and her cheeks flushed bright red from the hot shower.

She once again entered her medicine cabinet, a familiar unlabeled bottle was soon in her hands as she dropped a few tablets into her mouth. What was once a complex painkiller becoming… something else, when routed through her body in just the right way.

The throbbing headache subsided for what felt like the first time in a long time as she softly sighed, tenderly rubbing her fingers along various knots and welts in her shoulders and wrists, they dissolved quickly and left a tingling sensation in their wake.

She smiled and made her way back into her bedroom, a mostly unused space that called to her in the wee hours of the night. She breathed in the scent of old books and her fabric softener, a crisp, clean scent she'd always associated with home. Something dark and herbal, cinnamon and clove, danced just beneath the surface. The smell made her heart clench as she dropped onto her back, fanning her naked body out against the soft bed. The blankets were still tucked in neatly and pristinely.

Memories of blonde hair and jagged canines filled her mind, of whiskers and blue eyes like summer skies. An ocean she'd willingly drowned herself in dozens of times. Of warm hands tenderly touching her, friendly and unsure at first- like always- then firmly with need and assurance.

"If all it was to you was a challenge, was that all fake too?" She whispered, throat feeling unusually tight, she choked slightly as she realized tears were sliding down the sides of her face to the canals of her ears.

Had he been reveling in victory over Sasuke while he was fucking her?

The train of thought was quickly washed from her mind as another wave of warmth slid from her head to her toes, like sunshine fanning over her body. An odd cacophony of birds and laughter resonated silently through the space and she hummed to an imaginary tune that she miraculously knew all the notes to.

The red string was once again coiled around her fingers and she played with it mindlessly as she enjoyed the resonating warmth and sounds of her atmosphere. It was both taut and loose as she proceeded to spin it around her fingers, examining it in mild curiosity as she once again attempted to follow its end.

Somewhere down her hallway she could see it leading to where her couch was, and for a moment she thought she could see a head dip over the back of the couch, just long enough to give her a profile of a man, though when she opened her eyes she could no longer remember what he had looked like. Her hands were empty, and goosebumps danced along her skin.

The wall clock said it was nine o'clock in the morning.

She shoveled the snow outside from her open window and got dressed for her next shift. She was on her last set of clean scrubs and her last bit of coffee was scraped out to make a horrible watered down pot before she left.

"