ShahKar, Vulcan:
Earthdate March 20, 2380 Stardate 56079.8
"I sense another, Tuvok," said T'Pel. From the tight way she voiced her observation, Tuvok could have discerned her disquiet, even if their fingers were not interlaced one with the other's in the intimacy of the mind that meant so much to beings of their species- -a link which met so many needs of a Vulcan couple, but one which outsiders could never truly comprehend.
Silently, he reassured her. /It is Kes/
/Her spirit?/ T'Pel thought back to him.
/Without more precise data, I could not presume to categorize Kes' current state of being except to state that her sense of self is intact./
A ripple of amusement entered into his consciousness, so completely unlike the Vulcan appreciation of irony which comprised what he considered to be the equivalent of a sense of humor in his wife that he knew it could only have come from Kes. At the same time-he could only explain it in this way should he be asked, for no image or words came into his mind-he knew that Kes continued to maintain a corporeal form for a substantial portion of the time.
"Fascinating," T'Pel breathed, confirming that she, too, was privy to this perception through her continuing telepathic communication with Tuvok.
Carefully, he projected an image of the safe return of Voyager to Earth and of the well-being of those to whom Kes had been close. Again, without any awareness of how it was done, he perceived she was already cognizant of this and was pleased for all of the ship's crew. He also knew, without question, that Kes herself was home as well. He was able to "read" her as easily as he once had in his quarters on Voyager, when they would sit together as he taught her the disciplines of the mind she needed to control her latent gift. Tuvok could not contain his surprise. He was receiving messages from Kes-and sending to her in return-even though she was on Ocampa, all the way on the other side of the galaxy.
Swiftly he suppressed his emotions to prevent surprise from turning into shock, especially since he was still telepathically linked with his wife. Another ripple of amusement was transmitted, followed quickly by an element he could only describe as a contrite request for forgiveness, as Kes realized the private nature of the meditation she had interrupted.
Now Tuvok was in something of a quandary. Private meditation or no, the miraculous nature of a telepathic communication from one side of the galaxy to another almost demanded continuation if possible, if only to ascertain if by some means they could be assured of doing it again some time in the future. Somehow this must have been conveyed to her, because Tuvok could detect the clear presence of a question in Kes' mind, a question which, it seemed, was so compelling she had decided to try to sweep away the inconvenience of tens of thousands of light years of distance between them to initiate a mental communication with him-and had succeeded.
Before the full nature of the question had come into his mind, however, a momentary sense of disorientation occurred-as if still another mind was trying to wedge its way into the conversation.
The fragile telepathic connection between opposite ends of the galaxy shattered suddenly. Tuvok became completely aware of the touch of his wife's fingers between his own and surrendered to the comfort of her presence within his mind. Shakily, he drew a breath, unaware of how long he might have been holding it. Opening his eyes, he looked into the warmth of his wife's gaze.
"Should I be concerned about the status of our union, since you seem to be sharing thoughts with another?" T'Pel said quietly, but with a quizzically arched eyebrow raised high to erase any hint that she was truly accusing him of an infidelity.
"You need not be," he assured her, his own eyebrow raised in answer, but he found he was unwilling to release her hand from his.
T'Pel's free hand caressed their joined ones lightly in a greatly reassuring gesture, as she replied, "I am pleased to hear it. I find, however, that my mouth is as dry and parched as if I had traveled a very long way. I believe I would find some Tarkalean tea refreshing upon this occasion. Wouldst thou care for a cup of thine own, my husband?"
His gaze softened at her choice of phrasing. "Indeed, thy offer would be accepted with great gratification, my wife."
After T'Pel had arisen and departed to the food preparation room to brew the tea, Tuvok sat in the darkened meditation chamber alone. Neither of them had bothered to extinguish the lamp-the same lamp that had traveled back from the Delta Quadrant with Tuvok, having been used on so many nights by Kes as well as Tuvok himself; he would be hard-pressed to count them accurately at this late date. The flame of the lamp flickered in the chill air of the chamber. It was night in the desert, in the winter of the year, and the air would feel cool even to those who were not of the Vulcan race. To Tuvok it felt frigid-not that he would be willing to complain about that fact to anyone, even though the beads of sweat that had spread across his face could fairly be cited as the cause of his discomfort.
Truthfully, the quivering sensation that traveled up and down his spine at that moment had less to do with air temperature than it did to the circumstances of what had just occurred. Tuvok had requested his wife's presence during his hours of meditation for the simple reason that he valued her opinions and wanted her to participate fully in the decision he now needed to make. He had no hint that something as momentous as what had just occurred would interfere with their considering all of the pros and cons of the decision-making process.
When T'Pel returned, the tray she carried was graced with another lamp. It shed a considerably brighter light than the meditation lamp did. Alongside the lamp on the tray were an elegant onyx teapot with two matching cups. The teapot had a handle but was otherwise unadorned. The cups were engraved with a series of lines, none of which completely encircled the cup, creating an optical illusion of sorts by the impossibility of their geometry. Tuvok was silent as he contemplated the cups, the teapot, and his wife (not necessarily in that order) while T'Pel poured the tea, which steamed profusely in the cool air of the room. The couple sipped several times before Tuvok advised her, without further prompting, "Not only has that never occurred before; I would not have thought it possible had I not experienced it."
"I confess, Tuvok, that had you told me that this communication had taken place I would have found it difficult to believe, even from you. Because we experienced it together, I have no choice but to believe it-unless it has been a sophisticated hallucination we both perceived at the same time."
The eyes of the couple met. They needed no telepathic touch of the hand or words to convey to each other that this had been no hallucination. It had been nothing less than a true telepathic communication sent across the galaxy from one friend to another.
As one, Tuvok and T'Pel breathed, "Remarkable."
The utterance had nothing to do with the tea.
Ocampa:
Earthdate March 20, 2380 Stardate 56079.9
As her eyes came back into focus, Kes saw the flame of the lamp flickering before her once again. Her body was rigidly tense, not at all like it had been when she had been instructed in meditation techniques by Tuvok during her days on Voyager. Even when she had made her first frustrating, tentative attempts to expand her consciousness and make contact with Voyager and Tuvok she had not felt this way.
The sudden sensation she was being "watched" during the communication had upset her and caused her to break off the telepathic link. No, upset was an insufficient descriptor. What she had felt was terror-momentary, fragmentary, but there-an emotion she had sought to escape when Captain Janeway had given her the shuttle and given Kes her blessings to flee home to Ocampa.
Unable to remain still any longer, Kes extinguished the flame and began to pace the tiny space in front of her bed, crossing her arms and rubbing her hands roughly over her forearms to quell her feelings of disquiet. The intrusion reminded her of the time she had been assailed by visions from Species 8472, filled with death, destruction, and sheer malice. It was difficult to feel pity for the Borg, it was true, but Kes had felt it then in the face of the Species 8472 onslaught. Even worse, poor Harry Kim had almost been devoured by whatever they had done to him. The Doctor, with the assistance of Kes, had pulled Harry through that crisis, but her days on Voyager had been few after that. She had chosen to leave Voyager, thinking to save her friends from damage as she learned to control her newfound mental abilities and explored the subatomic world of particles and energy shifting between one state and the other.
In retrospect, that choice may have been a mistake. Once she had learned control, she may have helped them travel home to the Alpha Quadrant sooner. Then again, she may have been detrimental to their journey. They'd found their way home at unimaginable speeds (for a starship, at least). Had she been there, perhaps they would never have discovered the mechanism that permitted them to get home. Her attempts to harness her powers may have ended in their destruction, just as she'd feared when she'd chosen to leave.
Maybe it hadn't been a mistake to leave Voyager, no matter how badly it had turned out for Kes herself. A very small being, alone and lost for a very long time, despite her newfound powers she had been very close to being destroyed by a malevolent galaxy many times on her travels. Sometimes now she found it hard to believe she had found her way home, slipping through defensive lines of Krowtonen Guard ships, dodging the Vidiians and the Kazon, avoiding the Haakonians and Trabe, even with the ability to transform herself and her little shuttle, if need be, into a wraith who could slip through the ether at faster-than-warp speeds, escaping those bent upon her capture or destruction and returning to solid form only when she felt she would be safe traveling through normal space.
"Ouch!" Kes cried as she bumped her shin against the desk for the fourth time. She could barely take five steps in any direction before having to reverse direction. In her agitated state, she kept trying to take that sixth step. She laughed ruefully and said aloud to the empty apartment, "Able to leap light years at a thought but unable to remember not to bump into your own furniture! What a wonder you are, Kes! I wonder what the Doctor would say to that? Oh, dear, I wonder if the Doctor ever picked out a name for himself! I miss him so. I miss them all!"
Needing to escape a sudden wave of homesickness for those on Voyager she had once abandoned, Kes moved the curtain aside, stepped away from her bed, and crossed the small room quickly. As she fled through the doorway, Kes made a conscious effort to steady her heartbeat.
Coming into the hydroponic cavern did help, a little. It was strange. She always felt closest to her parents here near the growing plants, as if their spirits still lingered in the familiar haunts where her family had spent so many happy hours together, working for the good of the Ocampan people. Perhaps their spirits really did dwell here, changed by their Morelogiums into non- corporeal beings who had never learned to how to travel back and forth between states, as Kes had. She felt like a little girl again, longing to run into her parents arms for a close hug, to find sanctuary in the warmth of their love.
Kes sighed. Sanctuary. That's what she'd thought she'd find when she returned home, to live out her days, however long they might be, among her own people. In some ways she'd found what she'd been looking for, but in others...
Life here beneath the surface of her home planet was very different from the way it had been when she'd left. Better in some ways. Worse in others. That was always the way of it, she supposed. The one thing she'd never gotten used to was the absence of the one thing she'd climbed to the surface for the first time to find.
She longed to feel the warmth of the sun against her face again, perhaps with a light breeze to tickle her cheek, teasing the strands of her hair into graceful filaments dancing across her forehead. She even wished for bad weather as she'd experienced it on many planets during her journeys. First, the smell of ozone on a freshening wind. Then sluicing rain, or delicate snowflakes, sifting out of leaden gray clouds. Driving particles of icy sleet. Streaks of lightning followed by crashing thunderbolts.
These were her people's birthright, stolen from them by an alien being whose genuine remorse at the damage caused by his mistake could never truly recompense the Ocampa for all they had lost. She knew what weather felt like, but none of the rest of her people did. The Caretaker had offered them sanctuary and survival, caring for them the best way he could; but there was nothing more he could do to help them. He was dead, but the Ocampa were the ones buried beneath the ground. If the Ocampa were to live and thrive as a people, they would have to take their own future in hand and shape it themselves. There was no benevolent being to care for them as his children. It was time for the Ocampa to grow up if they were to survive as individuals and as a people.
It was a cold, cruel universe out there, Kes knew, but those who were willing to stand up for themselves could find friends as well as enemies. She had learned this lesson well, from those who had rescued and sheltered her on Voyager until she had been ready to strike off on her own. The Ocampa simply had to find the courage to look for them. They lacked only a guide-and they did not lack that either, if one who was up to the job was willing to accept it.
Kes made up her mind. Immediately, she knew she had made the right decision. For the first time in a long time she felt truly at peace. Kes' journeys were not done; she had not seen the last of stars and suns.
With a firm, bouncing tread that her friends on Voyager would have recognized with a smile, Kes strode through the cavern towards the home of her friends Tyeris and Benan. Finally, her path was clear. Kes had a task to take up, to complete or die trying. First, however, she had another promise to keep: to visit a set of triplets, to cuddle them and "oo" and "ah" over them and let them know that someday, they, too, would see the sun.
Resolving to find a place where her people can settle, Kes undertakes a journey of exploration that takes her to a sector where the inhabitants have suffered a calamity as heartbreaking as the Ocampa's. Will they be willing to share a world they know their own people do not need in exchange for the chance to find the peace and stability they must have to solve their problems?
All they need, perhaps, are "Altruistic Motives."
