'rfkmhnjc' said the tardis, ' I cant believe people would rather watch Eurovision than doctor who!, anyways tell me again why I can suddenly talk and also why are we talkin' about the show Dr. who when we're really here?'
'I don't know, what I find just that little bit more unusual is that I actually look like David Tennant, that Earth guy that plays me, you too Martha.' Said The Doctor whilst he scratched his head like he does, apparently. 'Hold up, the tardis is picking up some disturbance coming from over theERRRRRRRREEE'. The tardis reeled and writhed then fell into a space whole thingy. What no one knew was that the space whole was actually caused by Jess, as she spun around in circles screeching about how strongly she felt on the topic of nothing in particular.
From above there sounded an alarm FWEEE FWEEE FWEEE as a blue police box appeared right in front of the team of n00bs. 'Guys, OMG, its like totally the tardis' shouted everyone except Lexis, Vicki and Amok who couldn't care less coz they never watched the show much before(unlol).
Jess just screeched even louder and stormed straight into (literally into) the tardis door, before being shunted away by the puzzled Doctor. 'WHAT?'
'Lo' everyone exclaimed.
'WHAAT?' he said again.
'HELLO, U THE DO-C-TOR?' the n00bs said, a little impatient.
'whaaaaat?'
'Stop bloody fuckin' saying WHAT!' Vicki exclaimed, and wondered why her 'friends' were obsessed with this science geek's adventures.
'Well anyway, where are we exactly?'. Everyone sighed with relief because he had stopped saying what.
'We're in the um pokemon world, these are pokemon' weez said quite normally as she gestured to her riolu.
'Sooo, what are you exactly, What species are you?'
'Well we're humans obviously' said everyone except Jess who was still on the tardis door.
'Ok, so what is that hideous creature hugging my tardis? Everyone stared at Jess, embarrassed.
'That's Jess…she's a ummm..human aswell' weez. explained sheepishly. 'Jesssssss, NOOO! Get outta there now!'The creature had entered the police box and was dancing around like a mad wallaby that was high on prawns.
'no, no ,no no, NO, get out, you can't come in here' Jess wasn't listening, Jess didn't care, Jess was just dancing more and more, Jess was pleased, some say a little tooo pleased.
Whilst the Doctor tried to pry Jess off of the controls, Jess sneakily (wow didn't think that was possible) took his sonic screwdriver and hid it in her bag pocket. Then Jess randomly took Martha's phone and dialled a random number, she didn't know this, all she wanted to do was eat it. A red light flashed followed by (to Jess's joy and the Doctor's horror) EXTERMINATE!! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHO HAS CALLED ME HERE……. THE DOCTOR!!!!!
'Noooo, Me is call you here on talky stick' Jess exclaimed with a goofy Jessish expression on her face, 'u My hERo MOnSTerS!LOOLOOLOOLOONAN!'.
'EXTERMINA-' started the dalek but jess had already started hugging it to death
'daleks do not fear. But I think we need to change to survive, this creature is a threat, more so than THE DOCTOR'. Said dalek khan as he tried to spin the Jess off of him, Jess thought the dalek was playing with her, so she just licked him.
'MALFUNCTION, THIS CREATURE IS ATTACKING ME, GET IT OFF,OFFFF!!!!
'Jess knows what the doctor would do' jess got the sonic screwdriver out of her pocket and pressed the button.
'Where The Hell Did You Get ThAT!?' screamed the doctor at jess. Jess laughed and swallowed the screwdriver whole…
'NOOOOOOOOO000000000ooooooo,,,,,,,,……' said The Doctor, tears in his eyes. Jess wasn't phased, she just started to make beeping noises(the Doctor didn't know it was Jess soo…)
' What has she done this time, it looks like the tardis is malfunctioning too!
'You RE…ummm…TARDIS, yeh, RETARDIS, WHAT YOU DONE !!!shouted Lauly, finally getting to speak.
'Don't insult my tardis!' bellowed the Doctor, enraged, 'Think, think, think.. come on, what should I do?'. It was at that moment that the Doctor turned to see none other than jess with her head in the sky making regular high pitched peeping sounds. He screamed.
'however loudfully you can scream I can scream better…' jess then screamed, if you know jess you will know what we're talking about, and don't forget she is using sonic waves thanks to what she had eaten earlier.
'YOU IDIOT, look you've reconfigured the controls of the tardis, we could end up anywhere!' Jess didn't care, she never does, she just carries on and on and on, blissfully unaware that everything around her is buggered off, least until she gets bored, which doesn't take long.
There was a loud crash and more beeping, no, sorry that was just Jess…again.On landing for no reason Jess decided to capture the dalek she had previously phoned, as the dalek had already been paralysed by her lick, all she had to do was throw a ball et VOILA she caught it. End of story.
'uuurrrggghhh, where are we?'. Whispered Kayo. By this time, like 3.1415…hours after the crash, The Doctor had already walked off and was half way through repairing the tardis, well he would have been except Jess had threatened to use her dalek's move, obliterate (noone told her it wasn't a real move, but then no one told her she couldn't catch daleks, but look what happened.)if he even thought about moving. He promised that he wouldn't so the happy little Jess decided, like anyone else would have, to tie him and Martha to the police box with some shinies she found earlier in a toilet that didn't exist (you will have heard how Jess got out the shinies if you know her, if not then no details it's to dumbaga). They started looking around the new world they were in. jess screamed, everyone ignored her. She screamed a few more times then started running towards a clump of trees where music could be heard. Saki screamed next, then followed her. Everyone looked puzzled but then they heard shouts and screaming and scraps of music from where they had ran to.
'Were all in this together and we know that we AAAAAAAARRRGGHHHH!!!'. In a spazzy rage Vicki stormed through the wildcats crowd with her mewtwo, who had the same personality as its trainer, which resulted in massive psychic blasts erupting from everywhere.
'well this world didn't last long…and IIIII liked it'. Stated Lexis and Kayo together.
'It's a bloody good thing that this smeggy place is gone or I would've killed you gays as well' said Vicki.
'together… wait how does that song go? Umm? Everyone no. I swear there was a song like that before…?' sang lexis.
'awww man where are Saki 'n'Jess, no wait I can see saki LOLing at the destruction and O Googles Jess is with The Doctor.' sighed weez, 'It looks like she's laughing at him in a Jess way…'.
'hallo I am Gethin Gethin, I have a very manly voice, I think its an extremely manly voice, isn't it a very manly voice'.
'Please stop, please where are your friends, they seem to calm you down, I can't deal with you.' whimpered The Doctor. There was a long idiots silence for a long time.
'I cannot understand your accent…do you have a high voice try speaking with your high voice, it's the only language I understand.' Screeched Gethin/jess with, what he thought was a very manly voice, whereas he actually sounded like a chipmunk.
'right, who is responsible for this… thing?' asked the doctor still whimpering. Everyone looked at weez. 'WHAT! FINE! Fine, fine. I will restrain her.' Weez mumbled, turning to gethin/jess 'come on noodledoodle we are going on a picnic , come on follow me…' jess skipped along, a giant grin on her face. Jess likes picnics. 'JESS LIKE PICNICS!' jess screeched, completely forgetting the doctor and gethin. Weez turned suddenly and grabbed jess' arm, handcuffing her to the railing (to keep her from attacking anyone, not in a gay way.) 'HOORAY!' shouted everyone exept the doctor, who was on the controls and kissing his beloved TARDIS. 'Now, where to guys. I just want that … THING! To be outta here' he turned to Saki (0.o) and asked her where to go. 'SPIRA' she cried ecstatically.
'Don't be n00by, you want to go here.' Said the doctor. Everyone was shocked, both
because of his language and also because of what he had just said. What kind of evil place were they going to?!
