A/N So seeing how it's two days until Christmas and I'm still on the fence on who I want the Ghost of Christmas Present to be. The chances are I won't finish by Christmas.
So again epic fail on my part.
Still I plan on finishing this as soon as possible.
Oh yeah you'll notice somethings involving the movie I've kept others things I've changed (Like Brice's last name). I'm trying to get a nice balance between the movie and the KP verse and hopefully I'm pulling it off.
MW watch: Still working on the chapter
Plopping herself on a Lay-Z-Boy Monique reclined until she was staring directly at the ceiling. A sigh of relief had just escaped her lips when the elderly face of her mother entered her field of vision.
"Well?"
"Well, what?" Monique asked.
"Did you get the bonus?"
"You were using part of the bonus as a tool to eat your spaghetti" Monique grumbled.
Her mother sighed "it's just about the end of the year, isn't this around the time you start thinking about quitting?"
Monique ran her palms across her face. "No not this year. For one thing there's not exactly a ton of job opportunities out there. And secondly…" She thought things over for a moment. "Ron's a jerk ok, but he didn't have to hire me. I was desperate at the time and yes he is a tyrant now, but he actually came through for me."
"Plus someone has to keep an eye out for Mr. Stoppable." Monique turned on her side and closed her eyes "I just wish we could afford a tree this year."
XXXXXXX
Ron tossed a newspaper on his desk and watched quietly as Rufus crawled on top of it. The large headline on the paper declared the death of an eighty year old grandmother who had died watching a late airing of the Scrooge promo.
"It scared her to death." Ron said
"Oh-no" Rufus squeaked as he looked down at the front page picture of the elderly woman
Ron took a seat at the edge of his desk. "This is a terribly sad, sad thing. But if you look at from the right angle, if you can switch your point of view about ninety degrees to marketing 101 what was once sad is now terrific."
"Whuh?" Rufus exclaimed.
"Well terrific for me anyway not for the grieving family…" Ron let his words trail off. "But I knew that ad' would work! You can't buy publicity like this!"
Rufus shook his head sadly.
Ron sighed and pulled the paper from underneath his pet. "Oh what a surprise the "I'm disappointed in you Ron" look resurfaces. Didn't we talk about supporting the play maker Rufus? The last thing my creativity needs is ethical cement shoes. I've watched enough television to know that controversy equals eyeballs on the screen. Scrooge will be huge."
The small creature shrugged "Idunnno"
Ron clucked indignantly "yeah you don't know but I do. I'm the guy with the ideas, in this world I can do anything. So are you with me or against me little buddy?"
Rufus hesitated for a moment before nodding.
"That's what I'm talking about. Show me the money Rufus!"
"Damoney…" Rufus muttered softly.
"Show me the money!" Ron turned to the door just as Monique entered the room.
"You're needed on the set" she told him.
He tossed the newspaper at her. "Make sure the promo runs EVERY half hour! But I want disclaimers on it like a drug commercial. If you have asthma, if you cannot ride a roller coaster you can't watch this commercial."
XXXXXXXX
On the Scrooge set one could find various workers ranging from actors to carpenters scurrying about like woodland creatures. With the show set to be on live that night, the setting up "party" was in full swing.
"Sorry Mr. Stoppable but as I told the director the Platinum Pussycat Dancers cannot get on the air with those costumes!"
Irritated Ron glared at the woman who was representing the Federal Communications Commission. "What's the problem?"
She pointed to one of the Platinum Dancers who happened to be standing besides her wearing what amounted to festively decorated fishnet stockings, a boy shorts and thong combination, and a green tank top."
"You can clearly see her underwear!"
Ron groaned out loud. "Wait you can show a man getting beaten to death with a hammer on this channel but whale tail blows your mind?"
"You can see the crack of dawn!" The censor woman declared.
"First of all her name is not Dawn it's Francine." Ron spotted a burly construction worker sipping on a water bottle and gestured for him to come over.
He pointed to the dancer "can you see the uh….schism of the gluteus maximus?"
The construction worker squinted and leaned forward for a closer look spilling some water onto the ground in the process. "I can hardly see the schism."
"And he is really looking!" Ron announced.
"If it can be seen it's out!" The censor woman stated.
"Look lady to be honest I want to see it! Men want to see it, certain women want to see it! Charles Dickens would have wanted to see it!"
"Mr. Stoppable I…." the woman stepped forward and upon her shoes meeting the wet floor she found herself crashing to the ground.
Ron glanced down at the fallen woman. "Get the nurse!" He called out without even bothering to mask his indifference. "And make sure her underwear is not showing."
"Ron!"
The familiar voice with its cheerful tinge surprised Ron so much it caused him to trip over his own feet.
"Ron!"
It couldn't be Ron thought. He looked around until he caught sight of a flash of red.
Kim
There were was no big epiphany when he saw her across the room, nor any blood boiling. His general feeling was one of comfort. He wanted to approach her walking tall. He would stare into her eyes and shake her hand backed with the full confidence of being a powerful and successful individual.
"Hey" he waved sheepishly when he realized that she had quickly cut the distance between them while he had been planning his approach.
"Hey" she said. "I'm sorry to just barge in. I only got your message this morning. I called, but you weren't in. I called again, but you were busy. So I...well here I am."
"Here you are" Ron blurted out.
"You look different" she said.
"Well, it's been a while."
He noticed that she was glancing at the top of his head "hey you're using Le Goop again?"
"Huh?"
"Your hair the cowlick is gone. I just thought you were back to the goop."
"Oh well no it's not goop; it's actually something um much more expensive and rare."
"Hmmm well it looks great; you look sort of grown up."
Ron smiled; he was setting himself up to compliment her in turn when someone called out his name.
"Yo, Mr. Stoppable!"
Ron turned towards the head choreographer who pointed towards the rehearsing Platinum Dancers. "Check it out. The girls are primed and ready."
"KP would you excuse me for a moment?" Ron turned away from Kim marched back to the unconscious FCC representative.
Even though she was currently surrounded by and EMT team, she still had not come to. On his way towards her Ron snatched the bottle of water from the burly construction worked and proceeded to pour it on to her face. She spluttered awake and Ron pointed at the dancers.
"See? You just had to see it in context. It's barely PG thirteen." He looked over to the EMT's "Will you move her, please? People are trying to work….Thanks."
"Is….is she OK?" Kim asked when Ron had returned.
"Her?" Ron waved his hand in the air dismissively "Yeah, she's been in business for a long time, she's seen it all, a real pro."
"Huh" Kim then met Ron's eyes. "What about you? Last night you sounded like you'd seen a ghost."
Taken aback Ron began to stutter "Ghost? Oh you mean the phone call last night? Um well I was watching TV and I thought to myself 'hey remember that time Kim and I got caught in the TV because of Drakken's quantum reverser' I got nostalgic and I just had to call you immediately."
Kim shook her head. "Uh-uh I know that voice. That was the frightened Ron. That was "we're five minutes from Wannaweep" Ron. Your voice gets a little high pitched when you're frightened."
Ron winced "I never liked that Ron."
Kim's eyes twinkled mischievously. "Oh I don't know, I thought he was perfectly fine…..in small doses."
"Excuse me, Ron."
Ron turned towards the new interrupting voice. It belonged to an elderly man standing beside them tugging at a leash that contained an adorable pug on the other end.
"Um around these parts most people call me Mr. Stoppable!" Ron said.
"Sorry sir, but I got a problem."
"And I'm not surprised" Ron sighed. "What is this problem?"
"This little fella." The man gestured towards the dog. "I think he's a little nervous about being on camera he won't stop weeing all over the place."
"Weeing?" Ron shook his head. "No that's not a real phrase…. people don't say that….."
"Ron" Kim chided.
"Well have you tried hitting him?" Ron said.
"Like with a newspaper?" The man asked.
Ron ran his hands under his chin "I was thinking more like a phone book, they still make phone books right?"
"Ron!" Kim exclaimed.
"I was kidding" he declared. "I kid at times."
"I'd never hurt this little fella" the old man whimpered,
Frustrated, Ron attempted to shoo the man away. "Great I'll call PETA and tell them the good news. Now excuse us."
"Y'know I have three dogs."
"Fantastic, go tell Cat Fancy."
"But that's a magazine for people who have cats."
Ron nudged the man away with his elbow. "Then write to Penthouse forums, just go away and learn how to take a hint."
"A phone book Ron?" Kim muttered angrily.
He couldn't help but stand there and smile as she chewed him out for his apparent insensitivity.
"I wasn't…completely….serious" he cleared his throat. "But it's uh nice to know you're still trying to save the world."
"Well what I've heard from the grapevine is that you've been trying to buy it" She countered with a grin.
"HEY WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!" Ron suddenly shouted.
Kim was taken aback "hey you called me."
Ron brushed past her. "Who are you? How'd you get in here?" He reached behind a plastic pillar pulled a child away from it and forcefully held him at bay. "Security has ways of making you talk!"
"What are you doing to that kid?" Kim called out. Then a look of realization came over her face "hey isn't that T?"
"Who?" Ron replied.
Monique pushed past him and wrapped her arms around the young boy "This is my son, remember?"
"Ok you spank him." He glanced down at the little boy "I thought there were laws against child labor."
"He doesn't work here!" Monique shouted. "I thought it'd be fun for him to see a live TV show."
"Do you see anybody having fun around here?!" Ron pointed to a random worker "hey dude are you having fun."
"No way" the worker replied.
"See!" Ron proclaimed.
At that moment he became aware that Monique was ignoring him in favor of chatting with Kim. It seemed as if they hadn't missed a beat since high school and it dawned on Ron that they probably still kept in touch. It slightly disturbed him when he recalled all the things that Monique may have mentioned to her over the years.
"Hello Miss Alexander, you're still on the clock" Ron coughed after five minutes of chatter.
Kim and Monique exchanged glances. "I told you, this is how he is now" Monique said.
"I know I see" Kim nodded.
"I'll talk to you later" Monique then excused herself and her son.
"What exactly do you see?" Ron inquired when Monique was out of ear shot.
"That's for me to know and for you to find out you" she teased.
Ron bit his bottom lip "listen I'm sorry to have called so late last night. Did I wake your husband and kids?
"No, no. Don't you think at the very least you would've heard something if I had gotten married."
Ron shrugged "I don't really keep in touch with…people. It's been mostly all about work lately."
"So no significant other for you either then?" She asked.
"Er, no. I'm pretty unattached at the moment."
Ron shifted on his feet as they suddenly fell into a tense silence.
"Well that's quite a surprise we're both single" Kim said eventually.
Ron was in the process of checking off the pros and cons of his next move when the pounding of a hammer against wood derailed his train of thoughts.
"Would you hold the hammering, please!" Ron shouted over his shoulder.
"I'd better go" Kim said.
"NO! Don't go" Ron blurted out.
The hammering suddenly grew louder. "Would you hold the HAMMERING PLEASE!"
"Ron, what did happen last night?" Kim asked.
"KP, it was something I ate. Some bad beef and moldy cheese. Not from Bueno Nacho of course, some other restaurant I think it was Taco King."
"Well" Kim reached into her pocket and handed him a card. "Well, if it happens again gimme a call here. I'm not home most of time."
Ron looked down at the card. "You're still a sunshine spreader? Well I'm definitely going to call. You of all people know I don't have any will power when it comes to bad beef and moldy cheese.
The loud hammering suddenly returned. Ron turned on his heels towards the sound. "Would ya please for the love of your paychecks, hold the hammering!"
Ron turned back towards Kim only to discover that she was gone. "Kim?"
As he frantically scanned around him Monique appeared with a phone. "Ron the Times wants a reaction to the elderly woman's death."
"I don't know" Ron said as his head swiveled back and forth. "It might have been natural selection."
Monique held the phone to her eat "he says, "It might have been natural…"
Ron quickly snatched the phone away from her. "oh you, you, you, you…." he muttered to her, before placing the phone to his ear, "This is Ron Stoppable. We are saddened by this tragedy..." he stopped when the hammering suddenly grew louder.
"Would you please hold the hammering? Now!" Frustrated, Ron tossed the phone in a random direction. The phone startled a nearby carpenter when it smacked into a wooden pillar near his head. The carpenter cried out in surprise and stumbled backwards into an unfinished wooden wall. The wall tipped over and began a disastrous domino effect taking as much of the standing set suddenly came toppling to the ground.
In the wake of the destruction, Ron patted down his hair and smoothed out his clothes. "K I'm a little stressed so I'm going to lunch. Carry on."
XXXXXXXX
"How's everything going, Ron?"
Ron nervously shifted his eyes from the pitcher of water sitting at the middle of the dinner table to his boss..
"Couldn't be better Mr. R." he said just as the waiter approached. "And I should know because I'm overlooking every little detail."
"Mr. Rhinelander, Mr. Stoppable. May I get you both a drink?" The waiter asked.
"I'll have a highball" Rhinelander announced.
"Highball will be my weapon of choice as well" Ron said cheerfully.
"Ronald" Rhinelander began when the waiter departed. "I'm going to be honest with you. I'm afraid you might be spreading yourself a little thin. So I've taken the liberty of hiring somebody to help you."
Ron's initial response was a series of blinks. "Um ah Booyah…" he said with faux enthusiasm.
"I knew you'd be pleased" Rhinelander replied.
"I couldn't possibly….ever be more pleased than I am right now" Ron responded. "Who is it?"
"Pellegrino, rocks, twist" someone shouted gleefully to the waiter.
Ron turned towards the voice to see Brice Backstabanowski rapidly approaching the table.
"Well we meet again how are ya?" he greeted. He shook Ron's hand, casually brushed some lint of Ron's shoulder and then took a seat.
"Now Ronald I know this is coming from out of the blue, but I'm only here to make things easier for you. You might see me as a threat and that's only natural......."
The chiming of a tiny bell interrupted Brice's speech. "That's me" he reached into his pocket and pulled out a antique stop watch.
It only took one brief peek for Ron to notice that it was now twelve o clock.
You will be visited by three ghosts. Lew Hayward's voice resonated inside Ron's skull. Expect the first one tomorrow at noon.
Ron glanced at a grandfather clock in a corner of the restaurant, it too read noon. He looked down at his watch; also noon. He felt a panic creeping over him. Sweat drops appeared on his forehead while his eyes darted back and forth across the room. Meanwhile Brice had continued to ramble.
Brice!
"Ah Haaaaaaaaa!" Ron shouted as he pointed an accusing finger at Brice. He did so until he could no longer remain ignorant of the awkward tension in the air. It didn't take him long to realize he was gathering strange looks by large amounts.
"Ahhhhhhhhh you Brice, you're Brice right?" he said. "You I remember, ah ha….yes…..you."
He looked quickly at Rhinelander and flashed a smile. Rhinelander sighed uneasily and Ron sunk deeper into seat.
"But when er...Preston hired me this morning" Brice continued. "As...As a what...a consultant, I suppose. I said, 'I'll be one of the team.'"
Ron chuckled politely.
"My, er... my rugby coach used to say, there's no 'l', in T-E-A-M."
The waiter returned and began to disperse the drinks. "Here we are gentlemen, one for you sir and one for you."
Ron nodded in acknowledgment; he looked down at his drink to discover that his cup was overflowing with a flood of squirming, crawling, bugs. Screaming at the top of his lung, it took all his restraint for him not to jump out of his seat.
"Creeping… crawling… everywhere!" he shouted.
Under the curious gaze of Rhinelander and Brice, Ron slowly regained his composure. It was suddenly apparent to him that for whatever reason they had no problem with a teeming cup of filthy multi-legged creatures. With the waiter looking on in confusion he gestured to the cup with his eyes.
The waiter caught the gesture. "Oh I'm terribly sorry Mr. Stoppable, I..." When he leaned forward to pick up the cup Ron grabbed him by the wrist "Are you him? Are you him?"
"Him' is grammatically incorrect the correct pronoun in this situation would be 'he'" The waiter corrected. "Now I'll take this away."
When the waiter left Rhinelander leaned over to Ron "don't come apart on me, Ronald" he whispered.
"No. No." Ron shook himself like a wet dog to clear the cobwebs from his mind. He turned to Brice who was in process of suppressing a grin.
"What was that your coach said?"
"The point is, Ron..." Brice said.
"Are you ready to order?" The waiter interrupted once again.
"Great! I'll have the California health plate." Brice answered.
Another waiter entering the room captured Ron's' attention. The waiter presented a covered dish to a couple sitting directly in Ron's line of sight.
Rhinelander followed up "I'll have the rack of lamb today."
The second waiter bowed and melodramatically lifted the tray of the dish.
The waiter at their table brought his attention to Ron "Sir?"
"Oh, my God!!!" Ron shouted.
It was frightening sight. A monkey wearing a purple T-shirt and a coonskin cap leapt from beneath the tray and onto the waiter. Baring his tiny sharp teeth, he began screeching and clawing his boney little fingers at the poor man.
"MmmmmooOOONkkkkk" Ron blabbered. "B…..bbbb…Bo….bo" he then sputtered.
Brice grinned at Ron's excessive freak out.
"Somebody save him!" Ron shouted out as Bobo clawed at the screaming waiter's neck.
"I recommend the baked Alaska, sir." The waiter said.
Ron pointed urgently at the horrific scene "look!"
The waiter shook his head. "No, sir, that's meatloaf. You wouldn't want that, it's not very good."
Ron drew in a deep breath "I'm gonna..."
"Have...?" The waiter inquired.
"Gonna have" Ron repeated.
"Have...?"
"I'm gonna have some air." Before Rhinelander could protest Ron was already out of his seat.
Shocked and appalled that no one would help the poor man rushed over to his aide. The aide came in the form of him smacking the waiter upside his head with a swipe at where he believed the monkey Bobo to believe. Shocked the waiter fell onto his rear end. The stunned look on the waiter's face and the lack of monkey anywhere in the vicinity caused Ron to deflate.
"Excuse me. I'm sorry. I thought you were Ann Darrow." Ron walked past the waiter and muttered "really sorry about that, feel free to call my lawyer."
His shoulders slumped, his head low the blond executive wordlessly stumbled out the door.
XXXXXXXXXXXX
It was but a few seconds after he had hailed a cab down the block that another one recklessly backed into his field of vision. The rather old fashioned looking vehicle parked before him had appeared so abruptly that it caused the first cab to come to a screeching halt to avoid a collision. Following the policies of first come first serve Ron immediately dove into what was readily available to him.
"Hey dude can you spin around the park for a sec I gotta clear my head….."
Before Ron could finish his sentence the cab lurched forward pushing him into the backseat. The car sped down the streets rapidly darting between slower cars. As the city blurred past, Ron's head began to spin and he felt nauseous
"Hey Speed Racer, how about ya slow down some!"Ron managed to sputter.
"Relax, Kid. Enjoy the ride." The cab driver turned to face Ron revealing a chubby face sporting a five o clock shadow. The word "ride" and the blue sailor's cap on the driver's noggin made the light bulb in Ron's head burst.
"Hey! You're Captain Louis" Ron said.
Louis smiled "and you're that fellow, the one who busted my radio and used my navigational charts for a napkin….Ron something."
"Stoppable! Ron Stoppable! I'm rich now…" Ron folded his arms over his chest. "Man it's been awhile since you gave me that ride to Drakken's lair. I've spent my time becoming successful. What have you been up to?"
Apparently ignorant of the fact that the cab was swaying in and out of each passing lane, Louis grinned brightly.
"Well I can't complain. Heart attack a few years ago set me back a bit, but things have been looking up since then."
Ron glanced out the window doing his best to appear affluently indifferent. "Heart attack huh? Surviving that must have been something."
Louis scoffed as he stuck a smoking cigar onto his mouth "who said I survived?"
Ron froze "say what?"
"Oh yeah by the way I'm the ghost." Louis laughed heartily.
A loud scream escaped Ron's lips as he struggled with the handle of the car door. The handle snapped off in his hands and his screaming intensified.
"You don't mind if I smoke?" Louis declared as he recklessly maneuvered the cab around a petroleum truck.
"Smoke smoke! Just drive more gooder" Ron screeched.
Cackling happily Louis let go of the wheel and covered his eyes as the cab was engulfed by a cloud of fog.
"Please pull over I'll get your radio repaired, I'll buy you a brand new map, just pull over."
The cab burst through the fog and sped head first into an oncoming tow truck. Laughing out loud Louis covered his eyes with both hands. Blinded by the tow truck's headlights Ron brought his knees up to his chest and rocked back and forth in the backseat.
To Ron's relief and subsequent shock the tow truck passed right through the cab as if it were passing through air. Ron stared back at the tow truck in the rearview mirror and then he looked back at Louis.
"Where are we?" Ron looked over at the meter and saw that it was for some strange reason ticking down.
"Where are we? You mean 'when are we?'" Louis chuckled.
"Just take me home please" Ron sighed.
"Can do" he announced.
A moment later the cab pulled into a driveway and came to a complete stop. Captain Louis slid out of the car and casually popped open the rear door allowing Ron to stumble outwards onto the ground. Ron jumped to his feet and wiped the grime from his suit.
"You know this is kidnapping right? It's a crime in this country."
Louis shrugged "last I checked the government had no jurisdiction over the dead."
Ron looked up the driveway and took in the sight of the house before him "hey this is my old crib."
He then frowned sourly when he saw the knowing look on Louis' face. "Man what a dump, I'm sure my parents are sooooo glad I moved them out of this place. Got them a house so modern when you walk in you'll think you've stepped into a Jetson's cartoon."
"Oh so now it's a dump. When you were a kid this was Notre Dame to your Quasimodo. Oh and during the holidays you were prancing around here like a red-nosed reindeer."
"Hey I know the game you're trying to play here. I'm wise to what's going down ok, I'm wise."
"Are you now?"
"Oh yeah I get it. I've seen this movie…."
"Have you read the book by the way?"
Ron shook his head rapidly back and forth "that doesn't matter. What does matter is that I know you've taken me back to see some hallmark moment with my folks, and I'm supposed to get all weepy. Well forget it bro-ha I haven't cried in over a year, and that's a personal record."
"Y'know I heard that Al Capone expressed similar sentiments, but when he saw his mom, Victoria falls."
Ron nodded in response. "I just had a wild idea…."
Louis blew out a smoke ring "you can't bribe me. I'm a ghost I've got no use for money."
"Well I do, so let's get this over with" Ron grunted. Skulking sourly he followed Louis up the porch of his former home.
"Follow me" Louis said as he casually phased through the door into the house. Shrugging to himself Ron walked right into door. He let out a soft whimper when his nose made contact with wood. The sounds of coarse laughter wafted out from behind the door.
"Hilarious!" Ron groaned angrily.
The door swung open and Captain Louis stepped out "That's for my radio."
Rubbing his nose down vigorously Ron stormed inside "keep your voice down dude, if I remember correctly we've got a neighborhood watch."
"Oh, relax, Stoppable. This isn't live it's like something you Tivo-ed, no one can hear us or see us. Just enjoy the show."
Still fuming over his nose, Ron was in the process of scowling at the former captain when the door to the house swung up for the second time. He watched in surprise as a six year old version of himself marched in with his father trailing behind. Snow caking their clothes father and son happily strolled past, completely unaware of Ron and his spirit guide.
"So put away those petty problems ...and embrace you fellow man!" Six year old Ron crowed as they entered the kitchen
There they found Mrs. Stoppable setting steaming mugs of hot chocolate on the kitchen table. "Did you have fun at the Possible's sweetie?"
"Well we had the comfy couch, the TV, some cookies, my favorite cartoon snowman, and my best friend" Six year old Ron listed off each item on his finger tips. "So yeah there was a lot of fun going on."
Ron leaned against the refrigerator as he watched his father and mother preparing the kitchen table.
"Well I hope you're not all funned out" Mrs. Stoppable said.
"No way" six year old Ron replied.
The family eagerly sat down at the table and six year old Ron began stirring a candy cane into the rich dark chocolate. Mrs. Stoppable had fixed them cheese blintzes and latkes, and they were on a festive decorative platter than had once belonged to her grandmother. Mrs. Stoppable cherished her platter, and as in holidays past she began to tell stories of the recipes her grandmother had shared with her. The second the stories were concluded, six year old Ron to his mother's disapproval, but to his father's mischievous delight, would spin a dreidelacross the table as fast as he could. Sometimes the dreidel would zoom right off the table other times it would knock over a cup or some plastic fruit. For some reason; most likely an inside joke that Mrs. Stoppable was not in on, six year old Ron and his father would always double over with laughter.
Ron was enchanted by the scene. He found the spinning dreidel, the eight flickering candles, the smell of latkes and the soft music in the background accompanied by eruptions of joyous laughter entirely enticing. And when his mother leaned over, kissed him lightly on the forehead, and said "happy Hanukah my little angel."
Two twin tails of tears cascaded down both sides of his cheeks.
Captain Louis fished a handkerchief out his front pocket and handed it to Ron "Victoria Falls, Ronnie angel"
Ron swiped at his eyes "I was staring too deeply into the menorah."
Louis scoffed and placed it back into his pocket "what do you know, an executive who lies."
Ron sniffed loudly and ran his hands across his face. "Business guy rule number two, you don't lie you offer alternative truths."
"Your parents won't be around forever."
"You make it sound like I don't love my parents" Ron said. "I do, but I've got my own life to live."
The ex captain waved his hand towards the family scene. "Face it ya miss it."
Ron nodded "this is cute, no doubt." He put both hands in the air and separated his palms by a foot. He wiggled his left hand "this is me then" he wiggled his right hand "this is me now."
He placed his face into the gap "and this is close to two decade's worth of growing up and maturity in between."
"Growing up?" Louis said skeptically. "When you're home alone you watch DVD's of cartoons from the 80s in your underwear."
Ron inhaled sharply "sometimes I need to feel nostalgic to get by."
"Mature? You still laugh at dirty limericks you heard in the third grade."
"What are you stalking me?" Ron asked. "The point is I don't need these childish…situations anymore."
"Is that right?" Louis countered.
Ron pointed at the ghost "I'm rich, I'm successful. I don't need this. Take me back to my office."
"Gladly" Louis muttered. A moment later he was holding the front door open. "Right this way Rockefeller."
XXXXXXX
Ron scanned his immediate surroundings. He had apparently stepped out of his old home and into an elevator. The elevator contained him, Captain Louis and another past version of himself standing in the corner with a folder under his arm. He brought his palm to his forehead "oh, it goes on……Where are we now?"
"Where are we? Don't you mean when…."
"Please not that joke again" Ron groaned
Louis opened his arms "what…you don't recognize it. It's your workplace, a couple of years back but it's your workplace."
The elevator doors slid open and a young man in a fine suit stepped inside. He took one look at the visible Ron and grinned. "Hey Stoppable, I just got my bonus so I'm taking my girl to the Caymans as a Christmas gift, what are you getting your chick?"
Fresh out of college Ron sighed "See Jake I'm an intern so I can't really afford to….."
"That's a shame" Jake interjected. "Rough economy right, I'm sure you can find something on sale for her."
"You know I've been to Caymans on missions with Kim….."
"Yeah that's good to know" Jake pulled a cell phone from the back of his pants, flipped it open, pushed a few buttons and held it against his ear.
"Ok you don't respect me as an intern. I get that" Fresh out of college Ron said. "But does me helping save world a few times not impress you even just a little?"
Jake stared at Fresh out of college Ron for a second or so "oh yeah, you were uh the sidekick right…with Kim Possible?"
"Yeah….But I was more like a partner…."
"No, no, no" Jake shouted into his phone. "You're supposed to use the money from the new investors to pay the older ones."
The doors opened again. "Keep your eye on the prize big guy" Jake told Fresh out of college Ron as the doors closed behind him.
Ron turned to Captain Louis. "Fun fact, a few years from now…I'm going to be firing that guy and its going to be like biting into a pumpkin spice pixie muffin."
Louis glanced curiously at Ron "how is that a fun fact?"
Ron shrugged "the more you know…"
Rufus popped his head out of F.O.C Ron's pocket and blew a raspberry at the door. F.O.C Ron petted his good friend "I know I'd rather be at home setting up the decorations as well, but if I can't get a steady gig here it's back to Smarty Mart. I promised Kim and my folks I'd do my best."
"K" Rufus sank back into F.O.C Ron's pocket when the doors opened up for the third time.
He stepped out of the elevator and walked right into a massive Christmas party. Booze and snacks flowed freely as F.O.C Ron waded through a crowd of partying people. He spied his boss holding court in the middle of the room and quickly made his way towards him.
"Hey, Rin!" Lew Hayward cheered when F.O.C Ron appeared beside him.
"It's Ron, Mr. H, Ron Stoppable" F.O.C Ron handed him the folder. "I've been working on something."
"Oh really?" Hayward took a long sip from a plastic cup. "Well son did you happen to notice a big party going on around here?
F.O.C Ron looked around "oh definitely, I just had this idea I wanted to run by you. I've been meaning to bring it up to you all week."
Hayward accepted the folder "well I'm getting anxious to get me grove on. So what's this about?"
"Coffee" F.O.C Ron blurted out suddenly. "I was thinking about B.N's weakness one night, and was up until my eyes were all bugged out and my drool was seeping into my socks…and you didn't need to know that all that."
Hayward shook his head "no I did not Ronald."
"Anyway" Ron said quickly. "I thought……I need to stay up, I need coffee…..and it came to me that the only weakness B.N has is that we are kind of low on the coffee variety. You might be thinking "we're low variety on coffee because we're not a coffee shop." You're right about that, but we can be a Coffee shop plus…..Plus Nacos, plus chimmeritos plus side salsa and bendy straws."
"Huh" Hayward said as he skimmed through the folder. "Coffee shop plus, that's pretty catchy."
F.O.C Ron ran his right hand across the back of his neck "we can introduce the new coffee with Free Coffee Mondays. You'd think some of the folks who drop by for the free coffee will have to be hungry right? So they're probably going to buy something to chew on with the coffee."
Hayward glanced up from the folder to F.O.C Ron. "Interesting….Ronald you've been having a hard time with some of the senior members of the staff right?"
F.O.C Ron nodded "Uh is that obvious?"
"Let me tell why my boy, they're scared of you. They want to bring you down and hold you down. Son withstand it, if you can rise above the competition then you have a bright future waiting for you. You boy, have got potential don't let anything hold you back."
"Thank you sir" F.O.C Ron blurted out with a grin from ear to ear.
"Oh that was awesome" Ron said to Captain Louis. "Y'know what you call that? You call that stepping up. One small step for the Ron-man, one giant step for Ron-kind."
"Hang on Ron-man, we're not done here."
The captain gave Ron a tug on and gestured towards F.O.C Ron who was currently departing the party area. They followed F.O.C Ron to a small corner of the office building, that was right beside the most frequently used bathroom on the floor, and was the farthest area from the water cooler. F.O.C Ron approached his tiny cubicle area and was surprised to find someone in his seat.
"KP," he exclaimed. "What are you doing here?"
Kim rolled her eyes "I'm here to see you duh." She rose to her feet and gave him a tender peck on the lips.
"Oh yeah, I remember this" Ron announced softly. "Kim was working on a second degree overseas; we didn't get to see each other that much. She totally surprised me by being there."
"Well this is me I guess" F.O.C Ron waved his hands over his tiny area, "I know it doesn't look like much….."
She put her hand to his lips "no, no don't start with the self deprecation. I get enough of that from your emails. So allow me to communicate this to you with accompanying sign language."
As she talked Kim used her fingers to perform various symbols in the air. "I…am…proud…of…you…Ron Stoppable…so…don't…be...so…hard....on…yourself…and I…Love…You."
Ron and F.O.C Ron found themselves speechless.
"Did that communique come across to you clearly?" she asked.
F.O.C Ron nodded.
"K." Kim held up a large paper bag before him. "Now I stopped by your mom and she's asked me to deliver these Hanukah teats for you."
"Hnk" Rufus scrambled out of F.O.C Ron's pocket and leaped onto the bag.
"Hey that's for everyone" Kim scolded as she began to unpack the food.
F.O.C Ron leaned against a cubicle wall. "When I get the cash…" he began to mutter. "I'm going to get you the bestest biggest r…"
Kim glanced up and he cut himself off.
"Hmmm you say something?" She asked.
"Um" he squeaked. "I said this is uh the best Chirstmaskuh ever!"
Captain Louis grabbed Ron again by the back of his collar and pulled him away from the scene. "Well we better get moving we've got years to be and memories to see."
XXXXXX
"What was I thinking moving into this neighborhood?"
Huffing loudly Ron peered over the railing of the fire escape. Below him a police car screeched as it chased after a cab. Garbage bags piled up on the sidewalk and the carcass of nineteen seventy five pinto rested across the street.
"Oh yeah talk about prime Go City real estate."
"You were thinking you wanted to make it out on your own without any one's help. You were thinking it was time to get out of your parent's place."
Loud huffing announced the approach of the Ghost of Christmas past. Inhaling deeply he tossed the remnants of his cigar over the railing. "Man I need to quit, or at least take a two month break."
Ron stared skeptically at the captain "wait aren't you..?"
"Here we are!" Louis shouted. He wiped some snow off a nearby window. "Let's see what's on" he said before peering into the window.
XXXXX
9-5 Ron lay back on his bed with a heavy sigh "I had to fire somebody today."
He was still staring up at the ceiling when Kim's face hovered over his. Her right eyebrow arched into her forehead as she crawled on top of him, she placed both hands on his chest, as legs wrapped around him tight.
"Did he do something wrong?"
9-5 Ron tugged lightly at her Christmas sweater "I'm not sure. He must have done something I guess."
"What you failed to mention was that you fired him and then you took his job" Captain Louis told Ron as they watched over the scene.
"It was the holiday season, why upset her?" Ron countered.
"Why didn't your boss fire this guy?" Kim inquired.
9-5 Ron shrugged "he said something about setting me up for the future. Said I needed to be tougher and more outgoing. I'm not sure what he means but this guy might have more plans for me than I do."
Kim leaned down and placed her hands on both sides of Ron's cheek. "I'm looking at you face and you've bag under your eyes, and worry lines on your face. If you don't like this job, you know you can always look for a new one."
"I hear you loud and clear Kim but forgetting about the piles of paperwork, the guy who steals my lunch every day and the uh cubicle claustrophobia. I think….no I know I'm good at this. And I think I like that I'm good at this. I want to be the best darn entry level jr exec Bueno Nacho has ever seen."
Kim smiled down at Ron "my baby takes the morning train. He works from nine till five and then. He takes another home again. To find me waitin' for him."
9-5 Ron chuckled to himself as Kim lowered her head and sang into his ear "all day I think of him. Dreamin' of him constantly, I'm crazy mad for him. And he's crazy mad for me."
He grabbed her by the waist and pulled her onto the bed. Lifting the sweater up slightly he began to blow raspberries into her stomach to make her laugh outright.
"Hold on, hold on" she said through her laughter. She rushed over to the Christmas tree on the far side of the room and returned with a handful of gifts.
"Let's open your Hanukkah gifts. The first one is from me."
9-5 Ron tore through the gift wrapping. His eyes went wide when he saw the gift. It was a Limited Edition Snowman Hank DVD signed by the voice actor who played the part of Snowman Hank.
"This is ten epic levels of awesomeness" Ron leaned forward to give her a kiss. "I can't wait for Christmas morning, I got you…."
"Those beautiful earnings!" Kim blurted out as if she had discovered another eye coming from her boyfriend's forehead. Ron leaned back with surprise.
"I peaked" she said she sheepishly. "Sorry."
Ron laughed "no problem, it's uh a taste of things to come."
Kim handed him another gift. "This one's from Yori and its addressed to both of us."
"Cool" Ron unwrapped the gift to discover a large book entitled "The Ninja Art of Love."
A crimson streak crept over both their faces. Kim inched closer to her BF while skimmed through the fully illustrated book.
"I guess it's the gift that keeps on giving." 9-5 Ron joked. H pointed at a picture in the book "Y'know , KP I think we could pull that off."
"As if" she scoffed.
"It wouldn't hurt to try" he countered.
"My spine tells me different" Kim replied.
9-5 Ron turned the page "well I've been in that position before."
"With who?" She exclaimed.
"With you, remember that one time we got stuck in that air vent in Dementor's lair and somehow I had my knee cap jammed in my ear?"
"Oh" Kim was slightly embarrassed over her reaction,
"You're adorable when your unreasonable jealous" Ron cooed.
Kim snatched a pillow off the bed and smushed it across her boyfriend's face "jerk"
Pulling away from the window Ron grinned broadly to himself "I almost forgot how much….fun things were."
"Ya forgot all of things Stoppable. We've got one last stop left."
XXXXXX
Wearing a white collared shirt and large novelty tie Management Ron stood before a band of female models whose pale skin, heavy makeup, dark hair and seductive expression made them resemble something from a eighties album cover. Three of the five women held guitars; the remaining two could be found near a drum set and a keyboard respectively. As music filled the room Management Ron grabbed onto a standing microphone and began to sing.
"Your lights are on, but you're not home. Your will is not your own. You crave sweats your teeth grind. Just one more taste and you'll be fine."
Management Ron paused for a moment when a woman in an ice cream cone costume that resembled a low cut dress walked past him. The letters BN were emblazoned on her chest.
"Now you're going have to face it, you're addicted to fudge!" Management Ron sang. "Might as well face it, you're addicted to fudge. Might as well face it, you're addicted to fudge."
Abruptly the music cut off. "Cut! Lunch break" someone shouted.
"Awww no, not this" Ron groaned as he placed his face in his hands.
"Oh yeah this" Captain Louis sad sadly.
The band dispersed and Management Ron sighed happily when the director gave him the thumbs up. He walked over to the concession stand where Lew Hayward was waiting with a Cheshire grin on his face.
"Very good kid" the mentor declared.
Management Ron wiped a bead of sweat from his forehead "Thanks Mr. H, I know the commercial was my idea but I didn't think you'd let me star in it."
"Son, I want you to look at this" Hayward snapped his fingers and immediately one of his assistants appeared beside him with a magazine. "This is the latest issue of Smart Money magazine."
Management Ron took the magazine and stared down at his face on the cover. "Former sidekick, turned whiz kid. Meet Bueno Nacho's idea machine. Wha…when did this happen? I don't remember posing for this picture." He flipped through the magazine. "Or doing this interview?"
"Don't worry about these superficial details all you need to know is that we've got one of the best PR departments in the world." Hayword snapped his fingers again and another assistant handed Ron a comb and a small bottle of expensive hair gel. "And here's your holiday gift."
Management Ron stared down at the odd gifts "um thanks."
"It's symbolic kid, from now on I'm going to be personally grooming you to be an executive. You'll be my successor, you'll be my prodigy. I'm going to mold you, I'm going to push you, you're going to walk down the path of CEO-dom and at the end of that road will be the seat at the head of multi-billion dollar corporation."
Management Ron's jaw dropped down to his chest.
Hayward opened his arms wide "I see it kid, I see it as clear as day. I see you as the new face of Bueno Nacho and I see record profits."
"Wow" Management Ron managed to choke out.
"We'll talk about the future over dinner tonight. Bring your girlfriend….Kim right. Yeah bring her along we'll have a ball."
Ron stepped up to one side of his past self and his spirit guide stepped up to the next. "It was the chance of a life time you gotta understand."
"I get it" Louis nodded. "Oh here comes the lady of the hour."
Closing his eyes Ron sighed heavily just as Kim embraced Management Ron.
"Are you ready to go?" she asked.
Management Ron grabbed her by the shoulders "KP the man in charge, the big cheese, El numero uno just invited us to dinner to talk about my future. I'm in KP, I made it!"
"That's great but we're having dinner with my fam today. Remember we've been talking about it for the past month."
Management Ron shook his head "whoa didn't you hear me. The man in charge, the big cheese, El numero uno, can't make plans a month in advance. We'll eat with your folks next week."
Kim chuckled "but it's Christmas Eve, this only comes once a year."
"Right Christmas as in the let's not be selfish holiday the "let's not sabotage one's boyfriend's career" time of year."
Louis took a deep drag of his cigar. "Now there's no welcome look in your eyes when I reach for you."
Ron glowered at the ghost.
Management Ron glanced back at the set "maybe if you could think a little about my needs and consider how hard I've worked for this."
Kim bit her lip "I know you've been under a lot of pressure. But this is getting like your last Bueno Nacho job. When everything went to you head…."
"This is so different" Management Ron interrupted. "This is not a high school job this is my future. My dreams……I didn't complain when you decided to go to school overseas when you could have easily gone to school in the States. I didn't say anything even when we didn't see each for weeks at a time. You always get to do what you want to do."
Visibly stung Kim stared sadly at her longtime boyfriend "I'm sorry. I didn't know you felt this way. I didn't realize how important it is to you."
"And now you're starting to criticize little things I do" Louis crooned.
"That's ok I'm willing to forgive you."
"It makes me just feel like crying---"
"Ok then Ron maybe we should separate for a while and you can concentrate on your work…."
Louis threw his head back and sang "----cause baby, something beautiful is dying! You lost that loving' feeling. Whoa, that loving' feeling. You've lost that loving' feeling…"
Ron reached over and slapped the hat off the former captain's head.
"We're rolling in five Mr. Stoppable" The director suddenly called out from across the room.
Kim sniffed "for a while….just to see…how it goes."
Management Ron brought his attention from the director to Kim "that might be a good idea. We could use the time to get our gigs together."
"For awhile" Kim repeated this time with a noticeable crack in her voice.
"For awhile turned into a long while" Ron said sadly. "Things got so much better at work, at one point I thought I didn't need anything holding me back."
"All right, I'll call you when I can." Management Ron turned on his heels and began to walk away.
"I'll tell my fam that you got hung up." Kim called out to him.
He glanced over his shoulder and nodded in acknowledgment.
"Ron" she whispered to herself. But at that point he was already in front of the camera performing with a giant taco.
Simply irresistible she's so fine, there's no tellin' where the money went. Simply irresistible she's all mine, there's no other way to go.
"Merry Christmas" Kim turned away and walked out of the room.
Louis shook his head. "You let her walk away to do this cheesy commercial?"
Ron both hands down the back of his neck.
"I'm going shoot from the hip here boy. Ronald Stoppable, you don't know who you are, you don't know what you want or what the hell is going on. Yes you've worked hard, but you've forgotten why you worked hard in the first place."
Ron glanced at the ghost with his hands up to his shoulders "hold on their Frogger you're jumping to conclusions. I've made a few mistakes. Sure I gotta deal with that forever. But I know who I am, a rich dude. I know what I want, cash and golden silk pillows, and I definitely know what's going on.
"It was then that Ron realized that he was talking to an empty space. "Err?"
"Psst! Hey, Stoppable! Over here!"
Ron followed Louis's voice to the monitor on the back of one of the cameras that was filming the commercial.
"What's going on?!" He asked when he saw the grinning face of Louis now back behind the wheel of his cab
"Sorry bub, time for me to skedaddle. I left the meter running so I'll send you a bill" Louis laughed loudly as rolled up his windows off.
"Hold on! Taxi!" Ron shouted.
XXXXXXX
"I have seen your nobler aspirations fall off, one by one, until the master passion, greed, engrosses you."
Confused Ron glanced around him. Suddenly and without warning he found himself back on the set of 'Scrooge Live'." He stared forward as the costumed actress continued her lines.
"Farewell, Ebeneezer. May you be happy with the path you have chosen."
"I am happy with what I've chosen" Ron screamed at her. "I couldn't be happier!"
"What are you crazy?" the actor playing Scrooge said.
"Yeah I'm crazy! Crazy like a squirrel!" Ron froze "no wait that didn't sound right. Well I'm still crazy enough to see through all these schemes!"
He began to stroll through the set "Boo-yah I get it now. I'm back in control. And you know what I figured out not even Kim can be that caring and wonderful. Nu-uh…No one can unless they've got something to hide! I don't, I'm the honest one around here!"
The actors and workers in the studio parted like the red sea as Ron marched through rambling incoherently to himself.
"Trick me? No way, not today, cuz I'm back!" He reached into his pocket and fished out the card Kim had given him. "Maybe we'll check things out with the Sunshine Spreaders!"
A/N So yeah tell me what you think? Feedback is always helpful. MW up next
