In all their years of friendship, Howard had rarely interacted with Randy's parents. It was almost as if they did not quite exist on the same plane of reality as the rest of the world, but that was ridiculous in Howard's mind. They were the strangest couple Howard had ever met, to be sure. The person Randy referred to as 'Mom' was not actually a woman at all, but rather a striking young man who Howard could never quite remember the appearance of. He had a smooth voice and hypnotic eyes.
Randy's Dad was not nearly as strange. He had nice hair, a dark complexion and was conventionally attractive. He never said much. Usually he would nod in Randy and Howard's general direction as he poured himself a cup of coffee and glanced down at his clipboard, muttering something about a 'record number of mutations' before stalking off to what Randy had identified as the family's basement laboratory. His 'Mom' would always sigh dreamily as he watched the other Mr. Cunningham walk off, his lab coat flowing behind him as though caught up in an unseen wind.
Every interaction with Randy's parents was quite strange. The first time Howard met Randy's 'Mom' (or at least, remembered meeting Randy's 'Mom') always stuck out in his mind though. The pair had just spent all night playing the anniversary edition of Grave Puncher and were sitting at the small breakfast nook in the kitchen. Cecil had noticed his perfect child, was sharing a plate of wheat and wheat by-product free waffles with his friend. This must be the boy his and Carlos's beautiful son always talked about during the small family's evening meal time. What was his name again? Ah, right, Howard Weinerman.
Cecil smiled at the boys and joined them at the breakfast nook, "Good morning, kids." Howard Weinerman jumped in his seat a bit. He had not noticed Cecil's approach. It was almost as if he wasn't even in the room until he chose to speak up. Howard felt an involuntary shiver go down his spine.
Randy was surprised at his parent's sudden appearance, but only because his 'Mom' was not usually up until late in the evening. He could not remember the last time he saw his 'Mom' during the day. Granted, it was 7 am. Perhaps 'Mom' was just on his way to bed. "Mornin' Mom," Randy smiled up at Cecil. It wasn't often that he was up when Howard was over.
Howard just stared at the strangely charismatic man. Something seemed so off about him, and not the fact that this was apparently Randy's 'Mom'. Hesitantly he grabbed another waffle and began to slowly chew on it, not breaking eye contact with the odd man. He snapped out of his trance when he heard Randy addressing him. "Howard," it was drawn out like it always was whenever Randy got excited about something, "This is my mom, Cecil. Mom, this is Howard." Randy had a stupid grin on his face as he gestured to Howard as though he were some priceless treasure from a far off land.
Cecil put his elbows on the table so that he could rest his chin on his hands as he looked into Howard Weinerman's hazel eyes. Howard felt very uneasy. It was almost as if this man was staring into his very soul, scrutinizing his every inner fiber, as if to determine if Howard was worthy of his only son's companionship. "So you must be Howard Weinerman." His polite smile seemed to hold a sinister undertone that Howard couldn't quite place. His voice was hypnotic and entrancing, each syllable enunciated perfectly in a well-practiced manner.
Howard could only nod in response, as Cecil blinked, slowly and deliberately, before retraining his gaze on the orange haired youth to in front of him. He cocked his head to the side before continuing. "We've heard so much about you, Howard Weinerman. Howard Weinerman with the light potato brown eyes and perfect carrot-colored hair and the voice like-"
Randy flushed red and quickly interjected, "I did not say that," he lightheartedly elbowed Howard in the stomach, breaking his friend free from Cecil's hypnotic stare. He forced out a laugh, "I mean Howard's hair's not perfectΒΈ right that's a little farfetched, am I right?"
Once he broke Cecil's gaze it was like a weight had been lifted and Howard could move freely again. He waved off Randy's comments, "Psh, you wish your hair was this perfect," and took another bite of his wheat-free waffle.
Cecil nodded slightly, to himself, as he stood up. "I better go and see what your father is up to, Randy." He ruffled his son's soft hair, before turning to his companion, "It was nice to meet you again, Howard Weinerman." Howard merely chewed on his waffle, as Cecil walked towards the basement of the Cunningham household.
The two boys were alone again. Howard raised an eyebrow at Randy, "Light potato brown, Cunningham? Really?"
Randy nervously laughed and shoved more waffles into his mouth to avoid having to acknowledge Howard's rhetorical questions.
