A/N: It took me a couple of days longer than I would've wanted but here, at last, is the new chapter. Anyone excited? Maybe a little scared…?

First, though… THANK YOU, from the bottom of my heart, for your reviews, listings and love for the first chapter! Starting a new fic is ALWAYS nerve wrecking. It means a lot that you've joined me on this journey! (HUGS)

Awkay, because I've already kept you waiting… Let's go! I really hope that you'll enjoy the ride.

WARNING: CHARACTER DEATH ; this chapter is, I'm afraid, going to be pretty sad… I'm sorry!


Nightmares


/ When Phil Coulson took Clint Barton away from the hospital the boy didn't utter a word on their way to the building where the trainees were to live. Later he'd learn that such was an unnatural state of being for the young Hawk. When he showed Clint to the teen's new room the boy nodded stiffly and looked around with wary, guarded eyes. After explaining the rules Phil announced that he'd leave the kid alone to unpack. Clint's bags were still fully ready for a swift departure two months later.

It didn't take longer than the very first two weeks before Phil was forced to have his first talk with the archer.

Phil sighed heavily, running a hand through his hair. He suspected that this kid was going to make him grow gray before ripe old age. "According to Anderson's report you attacked five boys who were bigger and far more experienced than you." He skimmed through the medical files. "Chipped teeth… Heavy bruising… A couple of broken noses… Impressive, considering that it took less than ten minutes before the fight was broken off." He didn't sound impressed.

Clint, who also had rather nasty looking bruises all over him, sat stiffly. A strange, hooded look took over the teen's eyes. "I'm already packed and ready to go, sir. I don't understand why this interrogation is necessary."

Phil was taken aback. Not because of the words but because of that tone. He explored that teen's eyes but couldn't read anything. "Is that so?"

Clint shrugged. "I usually have to leave sooner or later. Best be ready."

Phil really, honestly didn't know how to comment on that. When he eventually spoke he had hard time keeping his voice in check. "I'm not going to send you away, Clint." Because he was starting to get the feeling that too many people had already turned their backs on the boy. "But whatever it was that triggered you today… We're going to have to discuss it sooner or later." Perhaps not right away, though. Because he saw the dark circles around and the bags underneath those haunted eyes. He'd never seen anyone so battle worn. His lips opened but his pager was faster. He read the message and bit back a curse. "I'll be back in a few minutes. Don't sneak out."

"Is that an order?" Clint seemed amused. That was a first.

Phil found it hard to fight back a grin. "Yeah, kid. It is."

"Old man."

Phil really shouldn't have let any of his protégées talk to him like that. And there wasn't that much of age difference between them. But he couldn't quite bring himself to scold the already beaten looking boy.

When Phil returned twenty minutes later he was shocked by what he found. Enough so to halt mid step. He blinked thrice but the sight before him didn't change. Clint had actually curled up on the sofa of his office and fallen asleep.

Phil wanted to cover the boy with a blanket but didn't dare to risk disturbing the much needed rest. Besides, Clint looked comfortable enough. So instead he made his way soundlessly to his computer and continued to work. When Clint woke up several hours later the boy pretended that nothing had happened.

Phil could've gone through security tapes, of course, but he was old fashioned and preferred to find out the truth in a less devious manner. Three days later one of the other trainees finally revealed what set Clint off. It was two things, actually. At first one of the other boys was stupid enough to sneak up on the archer from behind. And then someone made the mistake of badmouthing Phil. That revelation was quite possibly the last thing the agent expected.

So perhaps Clint didn't trust him yet but respect was a great spot to start building from. /


Thor and Bruce were away, each for their own reasons. But the rest of the team heard the news at a lightning speed. The message Fury sent them was brief and chilling.

'The Farm's been compromised. Go and see if you can find any clues. Barton's alive. I'll keep you updated.'

They tried calling the one eyed man, of course, to demand further answers but his phone was switched off. Which left them with no other choice but to do as they'd been told. Of course they wanted to be there for their friend, to see for themselves that he'd be alright. But if something had happened to his family… They knew that he'd want answers. And if there was any way they could provide such they would.

The sight they met was like stuff from someone's nightmares. The whole building, Clint's very own sanctuary, had been destroyed entirely. After all the years he'd spent keeping it a secret, ensuring that it was safe for the most important people in his life… He'd lost it like this? The thought made Steve feel sick.

Natasha swallowed hard. For one, brief moment emotions were loud and clear in her eyes. "Coop and Lila… They should be in school." She gulped again and wiped her eyes swiftly. "But Laura and Nate…"

They'd all seen the scorched remains of Laura's car but had managed to keep it from really sinking in until now. Tony swore loudly and for once the soldier couldn't find the words to scold his friend. The nausea he'd been feeling earlier began to bubble into something far more destructive. "Stark?" he snapped, a great deal more sharply than he'd intended.

Fortunately, Tony didn't seem to notice. The billionaire's hands shook subtly, barely noticeably. "There… are definitely traces of two…" The pause felt incredibly heavy. "… remains, in there."

Steve kicked a stone that'd been unfortunate enough to sit nearby, sending it to a mighty flight. If Natasha and Tony saw it, they didn't say a word. None of them was able to look away from the ruins of what was briefly their hideout as well.

How could everything have gone so wrong, so quickly?

Natasha was so preoccupied by the exact same thought that she shivered when her cell phone rang. She frowned and gave the item a moody expression, as though it was the sole cause to all the horrors around her. What she found made something twist uncomfortably in her stomach. It was the name of a hospital she knew to be rather close, along with another brief message from Fury.

'Code 12. Get here quickly. There's something important you should know.'

Those words usually meant no good news. Natasha put the phone away with an unnecessary amount of force. "Stark, find anything you can. Rogers, I need you to pick up Coop and Lila from school. I… They can't come home and find this."

Steve nodded slowly. Then frowned as she began to take her departure. "Where are you going?"

"To do some damage control or damaging."

Tony had faced his share of trauma and tragedy. But this, right before him… It was something he couldn't even imagine. The thought of going through the rubble that buried what little was left of Clint's wife and baby was sickening. Unthinkable. Yet right now, in this moment, it was all he could do for his friend. There was something he desperately needed to do before starting the grim task, though.

The wait was torture. Luckily the one he was calling picked up quickly. "Tony? Aren't you supposed to be on your way to Paris?"

At the sound of Pepper's familiar voice Tony did something outrageously uncharacteristic he hadn't done in ages. In forever. There, staring at the greatest tragedy of Clint's little family, he felt a few tears rolling down his cheeks. "This…" He cleared his throat. "This is gonna sound like a stupid chick flick, but… I really needed to hear your voice right now."


Cooper was a far brighter than average child. He'd understood from a much too early age that his family was… exceptional. That there was a reason why they had to go to school using a fake-name and had been forced to memorize five different identities. He'd also known for a long time that his dad's job included countless risks.

He'd heard his parents fighting about it when they thought he was asleep. He'd seen his mom wiping away tears when she thought he wasn't looking. He'd seen his dad come home in a condition no child should've seen their parent in. For a long time he'd feared, from the bottom of his far too old heart, that one day his dad wouldn't be able to come home at all.

That day, which he'd definitely remember for the rest of his life, he froze right outside the school's doors. His heart skipped several beats and his eyes widened while absolutely all color left his face. He was shaking and without a warning felt so boneless that it was a miracle he didn't just slump down.

Because Captain America was waiting for him outside the gates and even a child could recognize the sorrow and helpless rage in the man's eyes.

Eventually Cooper began to move forward because he had no other choice. Slowly and dazedly, like in some sort of a nightmare. He didn't realize that he was barely breathing until he began to feel dizzy. The whole worry seemed to be twisting and turning unnaturally around him. He wanted to cry, to scream, but he was too numb for either.

It took something close to a decade before he reached Steve. When he spoke his voice was barely audible. "Dad?"

Steve shook his head. It looked like a ton's weight had just settled to the Captain's shoulder. "No, Coop. It's… It's your mother."


Fury was there waiting for her when Natasha stormed into the hospital, her eyes blazing a war. "Have you found him yet?" She'd never seen any point in hollow pleasantries.

Fury shook his head, appearing even more serious than usual. "No, but he hasn't left the building and there are only a few possible locations. And the surveillance is decent so we have a lot of footage. We have that under control." The man shifted his weight with… could that possibly be discomfort? "But… There's something else you should be aware of."

In that moment Natasha knew that soon enough she'd punch someone.

Natasha was led towards a room that was most likely more commonly used when the staff and a patient's family needed a discreet place from grim news. The thought sent a chill through her and her jaw tightened. She braced herself in the same way she usually did for one of her missions.

Fury seemed to share her fondness towards silence. Until he broke it when his hand was already on the door handle. "Before you go in… Remember that it was all done for a reason."

"Just open the door or I will", she commanded tightly.

Fury did as he'd been told, highly likely for one of very few times. As soon as there was enough of an opening Natasha marched in. And stopped dead on her tracks.

The man sitting there was supposed to be dead. Yet somehow he was still breathing, staring at his hands with more than a little glazed over eyes. Trembling a little and a bruise slowly yet steadily forming by his right eye. His gaze then rose, meeting hers. And for the first time in years Natasha looked into the eyes of Phil Coulson.

Well, she knew that she was going to punch someone.


Sitting at the rooftop of the hospital Clint expected to wake up at any second. Because this… This just couldn't be real. Any moment now he'd open his eyes with a gasp and turn around in his familiar bed to find Laura sleeping soundly beside him. And then he'd get up, go to the nursery and find Nate there, also fast asleep. Safe and sound. Because he'd faced this all a million times before. He always woke up eventually. He'd just have to be patient and wait it out.

His nightmares, even the worst ones, always ended sooner or later.

His phone had been going crazy. Natasha… Steve… Tony… They all kept trying to call him and texting him. Asking him how he was. (He'd be okay as soon as he'd wake up.) Steve also let him know that Cooper and Lila were alright. (For the sake of his children he'd have to wake up soon.) Until suddenly the item became incredibly quiet. Maybe it meant that this was all closer to finally being over. He really hoped that it was. He was ready to wake up, now.

"Clint?" Natasha's familiar voice managed to startle him. She approached him slowly but without hesitation, holding out a gray, worn blanket for him to see. "You've been out here for hours. You're freezing." She wrapped the blanket around him almost gently, then sat down right beside him. The words that followed a deep sigh nearly disappeared to the wind. "I'm sorry."

What did she have to be sorry about? This would be over soon. Clint nodded because he wasn't entirely sure what else to do.

He didn't know how long passed. Time didn't seem to have any meaning in this horrific fake reality. Natasha's voice didn't sound like her own when it registered to him. "Are you ready to go back inside now? I have a feeling that the hospital staff is getting impatient."

Clint shook his head vehemently. Unable to speak when even breathing was a challenge. How was he supposed to move when he felt like he was falling down, down, down, a million miles per hour?

He didn't turn to look but he sensed Natasha's nod. "Okay. Then we'll stay right here a little bit longer."

A hand might've grabbed his. His fingers were too numb for him to be sure. Clint didn't feel much of anything at the moment.

He wasn't going to wake up this time, was he?


Phil felt breathless and old beyond his years when he splashed cold water on his unnaturally warm cheeks. The bruises on his face felt like nothing. It was a miracle that neither former assassin had broken his nose. The true pain lingered elsewhere. Flashes of the past incredibly long hours bombarded his head mercilessly.

The look of shock, disbelief and finally utter betrayal that took over Clint's face.

The fist that collided with his face.

Clint didn't say anything, not even a single word. Somehow that was the worst part. Because sometimes silence is the loudest sound of all.

"We need to give him some time", Fury pointed out and Phil mused, bitterly, if it was one of those many lies the man had tried to make himself and others believe.

"What if no amount of time is enough?" Obtaining Clint's trust once had been pulling teeth. To even imagine that it could somehow be regained after a betrayal like this…

Fury didn't answer his question. "He'll want to know who. And why. For that he'll need our help."

"And then what?"

For the second time in the span of minutes Fury gave him no answer.


Clint didn't know how he made it back to his room. Or how he fell asleep. They must've given him something. He woke up to the sensation of something approaching. Instantly wide awake and on high alert he sat up the best as he managed to, a pair of unnaturally sharp eyes darting towards the room's door. Daring another nightmare to walk right in.

The door opened slowly. Almost hesitantly. At first he could only see shadows moving and he was instinctively searching for some sort of a weapon until a familiar voice paralyzed him. "Daddy?"

It slammed at Clint like one of his arrows. Right through his heart. And then, before he managed to prepare himself at all, his arms were full.

He'd never heard Lila cry the way she did then. No proper parent wants their child to ever sound like that. She was howling like her whole world had been crashing down on her. "Mommy… Mommy is gone, daddy." And just like that, with those miserably wept words, it was far too real.

Clint held his daughter as though he would've somehow been able to put her life back together. Tightly, desperately. When her hold on him tightened as a response he found himself breaking into soundless sobs of his own.


TBC


A/N: Oh my gosh…! I've typed my share of sad stuff. I wonder if this is close to the top…? (winces) Poor Laura and baby-Nate! And poor Clint – and remaining mini-Hawks! This is going to be a bumpy ride…

Sooo… Thoughts? Comments? Was that good, at all? Deletion worthy? That box down below is HUNGRY to know…

Until next time, folks! I really hope that you'll join in then.

Take care!