Another Nakama IV

Disclaimer: The following is a non-profit fanfic. One Piece and all the related characters are owned by Funimation, Toei Animation, Fuji TV, Shueisha, Shonnan Jump Manga and Eiichiro Oda. QPython only owns the original characters that he created for this story.'

Round 1:

-x-

BLOOM-BLOOM-BLOOM! Fireworks exploded overhead as the Foxy Pirates celebrated the upcoming Davy Back Fight against the Straw Hat Pirates.

Two people who weren't thrilled about the upcoming contest were Nami and Usopp. The two of them were currently grinding their knuckles into opposite sides of their rubber captain's head.

"You jerk!" Usopp spat.

"You've landed us in a real mess, Luffy!" Nami complained.

"What's the big deal?" Luffy asked as he attempted to eat some noodles while his crew literally squished his head. "All we've gotta do is win."

Swip! One of the Foxy Pirates threw a sheet of paper on the ground in front of the Straw Hats.

"You're forgetting something," the Foxy Pirate stated. "You've gotta fill out your team roster."

"We're not forgetting anything, you guys took your time in handing it out," Ricky said. "Your Captain issued the challenge so you're the hosting party and that means it's on you guys to make sure we get the proper paper work."

"I… hmph," the Foxy Pirate grunted and looked annoyed at Ricky turning the tables on him. "You each get to compete twice. Once you fill that out get it to our Party Organizer."

Zoro was the closest to the roster sheet and picked it up. "It's got all the events listed," he noted. "A race, a ball game, and a team contest." Without another word, the swordsman handed the sheet off to Ricky. "You've played this game before. What's the plan?"

"You're really trusting him with this?" Nami protested.

"Of course," Zoro agreed. "I trust him to get us out of this crazy situation."

"Well this says that the entire crew can compete in the race," Ricky noted, "But only three people in the ball game and only five of us in the team contest."

"OOH! Sign me up for all three!" Luffy cheered.

"You can't do that, Luffy," Robin corrected him, "the rules say that we can only compete twice."

"Which is why I'm going sit out the first round," Ricky announced. "This way I'll be able to scout the competition when you're racing and compete in rounds two and three."

"Right," Sanji replied, "So everyone but you will be in the race. What about the other two?"

"You, me and Chopper will compete in the ball game," Ricky decided, "Then Luffy, Nami, Usopp, Robin and I will be in the team competition."

Zoro blinked. "Wait… so I only get to compete once?"

"Get to?" Usopp repeated. "You can have my spot in the third round if you want it!"

"Sorry, Zoro," Ricky said, "But I don't think you and Sanji could work together well enough to be a proper team in the ball game. I'm almost positive that they won't let you use your swords so I want to have someone that excels with unarmed combat. If we throw in Chopper and all his transformations we'll be able to catch them off guard."

Chopper beamed, "You can count on me!"

Zoro shrugged, "If that's your plan, I'm fine with it."

"Again, Zoro can have my spot!" Usopp was all too happy to offer. "Seriously, if we lose I just know that they'll take Captain Usopp!"

"GET OVER YOURSELF!" Nami shouted. "They're gonna take me! I'm the cute one!"

"She's got you there Usopp," Ricky remarked. Nami turned and glared at him. "What? You're cute. I'd pick you if I was a Foxy Pirate."

"You broke up with me!" Nami growled. "You don't get to call me that!"

"Okay… I'm sorry that I called you cute," Ricky replied.

"Mr. One Eye, Ms. Navigator," Robin spoke up, "If you don't mind putting your lover's quarrel on hold until this is over, I think we'd all appreciate it. We need you both focused."

"WE'RE NOT LOVERS!" Nami snapped.

"Sorry Robin," Ricky apologized. "Anyway, Zoro's my special fallback plan if things go south."

"Then if that's all taken care of let's get this over with," Sanji resolved.

A moment later the Foxy Pirates' Party Organizer had received the Straw Hats' Roster.

"IT'S TIME TO ANNOUNCE THE ROSTERS THAT EACH TIME HAS CHOSEN TO REPRESENT THEM IN TODAY'S EVENTS!"

The Party Organizer was called Itomimizu. He was a thin man with a big mouth. He wore a long black and white striped cap that had eye holes cut in the brim to make it a Foxy Mask, a purple coat, yellow gloves and white pants. He carried a shoulder bag with a Transponder Snail on it.

"FIRST UP!" Itomimizu continued, "COMPETING IN THE DONUT RACE, IT'S THE ENTIRE STRAW HAT CREW – MINUS THE FIRST MATE 'ONE EYE' RICKY!"

"Did I ever tell you guys that I have a disease that prevents me from racing?" Usopp questioned.

"I don't wanna do this stupid thing either!" Nami berated him, "Just man up!"

"PARTICIPATING IN ROUND TWO: THE GROGGY RING, ARE RICKY, SANJI AND TONY TONY CHOPPER!"

"Any idea what a Groggy Ring is?" Sanji inquired.

"We've got to get a ball in a hoop," Ricky answered.

"I'm gonna try my hardest!" Chopper assured them.

"AND PARTICIPATING IN ROUND THREE: THE ROUND, ROUND, ROUND, WE'VE GOT MONKEY D. LUFFY, NICO ROBIN, NAMI, USOPP AND RICKY!"

"Looks like this is it," Robin noted.

"ALRIGHT!" Luffy cheered. "LET'S GO!"

"Hmm…"Foxy mused to himself as he sat in a chair on stage and surveyed the Straw Hat Crew. "The Captain, a treasure hunter, a swordsman, a navigator, a sniper, a cook, a doctor and an archeologist… So tough but I do have to decide who I'm going to take." A wide crafty smirk spread across Foxy's face. "I believe it'll be that one right there. Yes. That is the one I want."

"ALRIGHT!" the Party Organizer concluded, "LET THE MERCILESS DAVY BACK BEGIN! A WINNER WILL BE A CROWNED WHILE THE LOSER WILL BE FORCIBLY DROWNED! I AM ITOMIMIZU! YOU MAY KNOW ME AS THE FOXY PIRATES' PARTY ORGANIZER BUT TODAY I WILL BE YOUR COMMENTATOR! OUR FIRST EVENT OF THE DAY IS ROUND ONE: THE DONUT RACE!"

"How do you guys think we should team up?" Robin inquired.

"Considering a few of us have Devil Fruit Powers it would make sense to split up into teams of three or four people," Sanji reasoned.

"LEGAL BOATS FOR THE DONUT RACE CAN ONLY BE CONSTRUCTED USING OARS AND THREE EMPTY BARRELS! YOU WILL BE DISQUALIFIED IF YOU USE ANY OTHER MATERIALS! THIS IS THE PERFECT CHANCE FOR SHIPWRIGHTS TO SHOW OFF. OH WAIT, THOSE GUYS DON'T HAVE ONE!"

Itomimizu turned and tapped the assorted piles of barrels and oars that had been placed on stage.

"IF YOU LEFT YOUR EMPTY BARRELS AT HOME COME ON UP HERE AND GET SOME! ALL FOR FREE 'CAUSE THAT'S HOW GENEROUS WE ARE!"

"I'm not sure if three barrels in enough material to build a boat big enough to hold four of us," Robin noted as she eyed the supplies that had been provided.

"We've better go with three teams then," Zoro decided.

"I'm not involved in this event," Ricky stated. "But I'd suggest putting one Devil Fruit User on each team. That way there'll be someone to fish out the non-swimmers if you get sunk."

So while the Foxy Pirates began to work on their boats, the Straw Hats Pirates split into three teams and began constructing boats of their own.

-x-

"WHAT THE HELL!" Sanji yelled. He'd once again been stuck with Luffy. The Captain had completely dismantled all of their barrels and had the wood laid out on the grass in front of them. "YOU CAN'T JUST BUST 'EM UP LIKE THAT!"

"Sure I can," Luffy replied. "Just watch. I'm gonna make us a killer boat!"

-x-

SLISH! Zoro cut a barrel in half. He and Chopper were teaming together on this event.

KONK! Chopper clumsily smashed a hammer down on his hoof. "YAAAH!"

-x-

"Hurry up Usopp!" Nami snapped at the sniper.

"You know you could help too!" Usopp complained as he used one of his trusty hammers to nail some boards together.

"I'll lend a hand or two," Robin offered as extra arms sprouted out of the ground in front of Usopp and held the boards in place for him.

-x-

"I'LL TAKE THIS TIME WHILE EVERYONE'S PREPARING TO EXPLAIN HOW THE RACE WORKS. THE COURSE CONSISTS OF ONE LAP AROUND LONG RING LONG LAND. IT MAY SOUND EASY BUT BELIEVE ME, ITS NOT! IF YOUR BOAT SINKS YOUR TEAM IS IMMEDIATELY DISQUALIFIED FROM THE RACE. OH YEAH! WEAPONS? THEY ALLOWED! GUNS, CANNONS, EXPLOSIVES, ANYTHING YOU CAN THINK OF! IF THAT SOUND UNFAIR, THEN YOU'VE GOT NO RIGHT AT ALL TO CALL YOURSELF A PIRATE!"

"Phew," Usopp sighed as he surveyed their completed boat. "I'm kind of amazed that I finished."

BLOOM! BLOOM! Fireworks went off to signify that the race was going to start soon.

"AND TIME IS JUST ABOUT UP!" Itomimizu stated. "I HOPE EVERYONE IS READY!"

One of the Foxy Pirates went over to Itomimizu and handed him a sheet of paper.

"OOO! GATHER 'ROUND FOLKS! THE FINAL ODDS ARE IN!"

"By odds do you mean gambling odds?" Ricky inquired as he stood in front of the stage. "I've been looking all over and I can't find the bookie."

"I'M THE FOXY PIRATES' BOOKIE AND PARTY ORGANIZER!" Itomimizu informed him. "BETTING FOR THE DONUT RACE IS ALREADY CLOSED BUT MAYBE YOU CAN TRY NEXT ROUND!"

"You don't need to shout into that thing," Ricky stated. "I'm standing right here."

"I'LL ANNOUNCE THE CONTESTANTS IN ORDER OF THEIR POPULARITY! TOP SPOT GOES TO OUR IDOL AND FELLOW FOXY PIRATE: PORCHE!"

"Oh, you're too kind!" Porche exclaimed as she blew kisses to the adoring Foxy Pirates.

"JOINING HER IS THE FISHMAN CAPOTE! THEIR VESSEL IS 'THE CUTIE WAGON' LED BY THE STAR SHARK MONDA!"

Capote was a tall green swordfish fishman with a long, pointed green nose and long red hair. He wore a blue and purple Foxy Pirates' Cap, elbow length blue gloves and a yellow vest with blue shoulder pads.

Monda was a large orange shark with yellow stars covering his body. The shark wore a black and red Foxy Cap and was pulling a pink painted boat that looked like more of a chariot.

"YEAH!" a Foxy Pirate cheered. "TAKE 'EM DOWN PORCHE! YOU CAN DO IT!"

"HOLD ON!" Nami shouted from on top of the boat next to Porche. "YOU'VE GOT A SHARK PULLING YOUR BOAT?"

"I didn't hear him mention any rules about forbidding the use of sharks," Porche taunted.

"THE SECOND MOST POPULAR TEAM… OH! WELL THIS IS A SURPRISE! IT'S THE STRAW HAT TEAM OF NAVIGATOR NAMI, SNIPER USOPP AND ARCHEOLOGIST ROBIN! THEIR OFFICIAL CRAFT IS 'THE BARREL TIGER'!"

For the Barrel Tiger, Usopp had cut all three of the barrels in half and attached them together. Three of the barrel halves had been put together in a straight row while two others were attached to the side which gave the Barrel Tiger a cross-like shape. The final barrel half had been used to make a curved fin on the back which doubled as a seat.

"That chick with the orange hair is smokin' hot!" a Foxy Pirate exclaimed.

"I want that dark haired babe to join our crew!" another Foxy Pirate gushed.

"They can keep the guy," the first Foxy Pirate stated.

"Yeah," the other Foxy Pirate quickly agreed.

"LOOKS LIKE THE ONLY THING OUR FOXY CREW CARES ABOUT ARE THE PRETTY GIRLS!" Itamimizu noted. "WHAT A BUNCH OF HORNBALLS!"

"Hornballs?" Ricky repeated. "I voted for that one too mostly based on who's driving it too."

Tmp! Tmp! Nami stomped her foot on the Barrel Tiger, "You're sure this won't sink?"

"I keep telling you guys that I'm not a professional shipwright," Usopp reminded her. "I know that its at least better than those abominations."

Usopp looked over to see the 'abominations' that were being ridden by Luffy, Sanji, Zoro and Chopper.

Luffy and Sanji's sloppily constructed 'ship' was shaped like a long, thin sled and looked like the wood had all been randomly slapped together. It was almost completely flat with the exception being the two pieces of curled wood at the front.

"Just 'cause it floats doesn't mean it's a boat," Sanji grumbled. "It's more like flotsam."

"Shishishishishi!" Luffy laughed. "Flotsam!"

Zoro and Chopper's boat was a very different model. They'd kept their barrels mostly intact. The first barrel had been partially dissected to form a waterwheel. Chopper ran on the wheel to propel the boat forward. He held onto a smooth handrail that was coming out of the second barrel and the third barrel had been taken apart to make the small deck that Zoro was standing on as he operated the rudder behind him.

"You're gonna do that the whole time?" Zoro asked the running reindeer.

"Yup," Chopper answered as he continued to peddle the wheel in his Heavy Point form. "It's a good thing I enjoy running, huh?"

"It's a miracle those boats actually float," Robin remarked as she eyed their Nakama's 'ships'.

Whap! Nami slapped her forehead. "That means it's all on our shoulders if our crew's gonna win this race… as usual."

"AND COMING IN THIRD ON OUR LIST IS 'THE HAREM NOCTURNE'! A BEAUTIFUL BOAT FILLED WITH BEAUTIFUL WOMEN!"

The Harem Nocturne was smoothly designed so the back looked like a blooming flower. The raised petals of the 'flower' provided perfect seats for the all-female crew while the front half kept the view from being obstructed. The crew consisted of four sexy Foxy Pirates. One was blonde, one had mint green hair, one had pale orange hair and the last had pale purple hair. They also had a collection of wine bottles on the small table in the middle of the most round boat so that meant it wasn't designed to go particularly fast.

"IN FOURTH PLACE WE'VE GOT 'THE CRAB CRANE', AN OLD FAVORITE IN THE TOP RANKS!"

The Crab Crane was designed with two of the barrels cut in half and stuck together to seat the three-man crew. The third barrel had been used to make the rudder and the decorative crab legs, crab claws and stalk-like crab eyes.

"IN FIFTH AND SIXTH PLACE ARE THE 'SWORDFISH KING ONE AND TWO'!"

Swordfish King One and Two were identical with the exception of their paint color. The first ship was pale blue while the second was dark blue. Both ships were designed with three barrel halves attached together to sit three pirates single file. The left over barrel parts made up the rudders and the pointed 'swords' on the bow of each boat.

"IN SEVENTH PLACE IS 'THE PARTY, LOVE AND PLEASURE BOAT'!"

The Party, Love and Pleasure Boat had been made using large barrels. It was a big rectangular ship shaped like a ferry and had a bar in the middle of it with a large barrel half as an awning.

"HEY! WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA?" Luffy complained. "AREN'T YOU EVEN GONNA MENTION OUR BOAT!"

"SAME HERE!" Chopper added. "WHAT GIVES? I WORKED HARD ON THIS!"

"Oooh… well let's see…" Itomimizu mumbled then raised his handset, "AH! DOCTOR CHOPPER AND SWORDSMAN ZORO'S BOAT 'THE BASICALLY BARRELS' IS… HAHAHA! THEIR BOAT IS THIRD TO LAST IN POPULARITY!"

"GAAH!" Chopper gasped in shock. They didn't like his boat?

"Sounds about right," Zoro admitted, "I was expecting worse."

"AND THE 'AT LEAST IT FLOATS' BOAT-HAHAHA! LOOKS LIKE THEY WIN THE BOOBY PRIZE!"

"Hey… what's a booby prize?" Luffy asked.

"It means our boat is second to last," Sanji told him.

"There can't seriously be a boat that's worse than there!" Usopp remarked.

"COMING IN LAST ON THE LIST OF POPULARITY, WE'VE GOT THE GIANT BARGE 'THE BEHEMOTH MOTHER SHIP COASTER'!"

"Eeep!" Usopp let out a high-pitched squeak of terror as a MASSIVE boat pulled up behind the Barrel Tiger. The boat was simply three HUGE barrels that had been attached together. One massive barrel was in front while other two massive barrels had been attached behind it.

"You're kidding me," Zoro scoffed, "The oars can't be long enough to row that thing."

"And how are they supposed to steer it?" Chopper wondered.

"Hahahaha!" a Foxy Pirate laughed as and his two teammates stood on top of the front barrel. "Yeah, you guys are sharp. You're right about the oars. Way too short. And the damn thing is filled with sea water too."

"Not fair," Luffy grumbled, "Those jerks."

"Wait, there's no way that thing is just three barrels," Sanji protested.

"Sure it is," one of the other Foxy Pirates replied. "That's all it is. We pieced together the three biggest barrels we could find. There ain't nothin' in the rule book about how small your barrel's gotta be."

"OKAY! ALL OF THE BOATS ARE NOW AT THE STARTING LINE!" The Foxy Pirates cheered at the first round finally getting underway. "I'LL CONTINUE TO PROVIDE COMMENTARY THROUGHOUT THE RACE WITH A BIRD'S EYE VIEW OF THE ACTION FROM ON TOP CHIRP CHIRP A RARE SOUTH BLUE SUPER SPARROW."

Chirp Chirp the Super Sparrow was a huge twenty foot brown sparrow with a blue and white striped Foxy cap on his head. Itamimizu hopped up onto the big bird's back.

"Hold on!" Ricky called out as he leapt up onto the stage. "I'm not just gonna stay here while everyone else races around the island. I'm gonna come along and provide color commentary."

"WHA-WHAT?" Itamimizu sputtered. "HEY! THIS IS A ONE-PERSON SPARROW!"

"Oh, I didn't really your big twenty-foot bird was just a big weakling," Ricky commented. "That pigeon probably couldn't handle the extra weight anyway."

CHIRP! Chirp Chirp took offense to that.

"GET ON ALREADY!" Itamimizu snapped. Ricky grinned and got on the big bird behind him.

CHIRP-CHIRP! Chirp Chirp flapped his wings and took off with the two pirates on his back.

"WOOO!" the Foxy Pirates cheered. "GO PORCHE!"

"YEAH! DROWN THAT LONG NOSE!"

"WHY ME?" Usopp yelped.

"That's it," Nami resolved, "We have to win this now."

"Drowning is fair play," Robin pointed out. "It's in the rules."

"Says the woman who can't swim," Nami growled.

"Wow, they think they have a chance at winning," Porche remarked.

"Let those fools think whatever they want to think Porche," Capote said with a smug smile. "We'll sink 'em right off the bat. Right Monda?"

CHI-HEY! The Star Shark agreed.

"I'm excited about this!" Chopper exclaimed.

"What? About losing?" Zoro questioned.

"Pay close attention Usopp," Sanji warned the sniper. "If anything happens to those two ladies, I'll eviscerate you."

"We are gonna win this race!" Luffy insisted. "I know it!"

"Fehfehfehfeh!" Foxy chuckled as he stood on the shore with Hamburg. "That fool! He actually thinks they're going to win! What a riot! No one's ever beaten the Foxy Pirates! I doubt this race will even last five minutes. Am I right?"

"Pupupupu!" Hamburg laughed as he held his hands over his mouth. "You know it!"

"TO ENSURE YOU DON'T GET LOST, WE'RE PROVIDING EACH TEAM WITH AN ETERNAL POSE!" Itomimizu turned back to Ricky. "MAKE YOURSELF USEFUL AND TOSS THESE DOWN."

Itomimizu and Ricky tossed Eternal Poses that were keyed to Long Ring Long Land down off of Chirp Chirp to the assorted ships at the starting line.

Whap! "Get lost?" Nami repeated as she caught their Eternal Pose.

Whap! Porche caught her team's Eternal Pose. Whap! Zoro caught the one for his team. Whiff! Luffy missed his Pose but Sanji managed to catch it before it fell into the water. Whap!

"TRY NOT TO WANDER TOO FAR FROM THE ISLAND'S COAST!"

"What's that doofus talking about?" Nami wondered. "Why would we leave the island? We're taking the inside track the whole way."

"I'm afraid it won't be that simple," Usopp said.

"What? Why not?" Nami questioned.

"Take a look," Usopp pointed out, "Except for that really big one, all the other boats are on the outside track facing out to the sea."

Porche's Cutie Wagon, their Barrel Tiger, Chopper and Zoro's Basically Barrels and Luffy and Sanji's At Least It Floats Boat were all pulled up alongside each other on the side of the starting line that was closest to the island.

The Crab Crane, the Harem Nocturne, the Swordfish King One and Two, and the Party, Love and Pleasure boat were all on the far side of the starting line that was away from the island.

"Mr. Long Nose has a point," Robin noted. "That's a big suspicious."

"NOW ON YOUR MARKS…" Itomimizu prompted.

"What's suspicious?" Nami asked them. "Tell me!"

"I don't know but I think they're up to something," Usopp insisted. He turned and called out to the other Straw Hats. "HEY! GET AWAY FROM THE SHORE LINE AS SOON AS THE RACE STARTS!"

"Huh? How come?" Luffy inquired.

"GET SET…"

"Scheme…" Foxy whispered as a wide fox-like smirk spread across his face.

BANG! Itomimizu fired the starting gun. "GOOOO!"

"I've got a really bad feeling about this!" Usopp exclaimed as he and Nami used their oars to paddle the Barrel Tiger away from the starting line.

"Then tell me why!" Nami urged him

The only ship that didn't start to move away from the starting line was the Behemoth Mother Ship Coaster.

"Push it-push it-push it!" eight Foxy Pirates on board chanted as they spun a control wheel.

"Time to reveal the secret of our boat!" the Foxy Pirate on top of the front barrel boasted. "It's got a sneaky little purpose!"

Krek-krek-krek… The spinning wheel caused the end of the front barrel to slide open.

SPLOOOOSH! The barrel was filled with sea water that came washing out as a huge wave that was filled with barrels.

"HEY! WHAT'RE YOU…" Itomimizu protested as Ricky pulled the handset away from him.

"I just thought I'd chime in here," Ricky's magnified voice went through the Transponder Snail's speakers. "Wasn't there are rule about only using three barrels? That big one just spat out at least a dozen."

Itomimizu pulled the hand set back, "THOSE ARE JUST EXTRA BARRELS! THEY DIDN'T USE THEM FOR THEIR SHIP!"

"So what's with the barrels?" Sanji wondered as he watched the barrels from the Behemoth Mother Ship Coaster ride the wave towards them.

"Oh no!" Usopp gasped in alarm as the barrels came to their boat. "We didn't get far enough."

"What's the big deal?" Nami asked. "It's just a barrel." Nami reached out prodded one of the barrels with her oar.

"NOOO!" Usopp shrieked. "NAMI! DON'T!"

The barrel started to glow… AND EXPLODED! KA-BOOOM!

"WAAAAH!" Nami and Usopp screamed as the explosion sent their Barrel Tiger flying up into the air.

"Hey guys," Ricky greeted them as they flew up passed Chirp Chirp.

"AND THEY'VE BEEN RELEASED! KA-BOOOM! THE OLD BARREL MINES! THE COASTER'S TRUMP CARD!" Itomimizu smirked at Ricky. "SEE? THEY'RE WEAPONS! AND ALL WEAPONS ARE LEGAL IN THE DONUT RACE!"

"Bye guys," Ricky called out as the Barrel Tiger dropped back down passed Chirp Chirp.

SPLOOSH! Nami, Usopp and Robin splashed back down in the water with the Barrel Tiger mostly unharmed from the explosion.

"Heeheehee!" Porche giggled as she and Capote sailed passed them on the Cutie Wagon. "See you later, chumps! You're supposed to avoid sinking, ya know. Wish us good luck!"

"Uugghh…" the Barrel Tiger crew groaned as they attempt to recover from the explosion.

Fwoo… fwoo… Chopper frantically blew on one of the barrels to get it away from his Basically Barrels boat. "Go! Go away! I worked hard on this ship!"

"Dumb bombs," Luffy grumbled. His and Sanji's boat was right next to Chopper and they were both surrounded by barrel mines. "I'll knock 'em all back. GUUUM… GUUUM…"

"Cut it out Luffy," Sanji admonished him.

"STOP!" Chopper shouted. "ARE YOU TRYING TO BLOW US OUT OF THE WATER!"

"Calm down," Luffy told him, "We've gotta do something."

"Yeah but that something can't involve touching them," Zoro pointed out, "Luffy, toss that oar over here."

Whiff! Luffy shrugged and threw his oar over to Zoro.

"Stand back and watch," Zoro prompted as he held the oar out and started to spin it. Swish-swish-swish-swish-swish! Zoro's spinning oar created a breeze that started to blow the barrel mines away from their ships. SWISH! Zoro slashed the oar like a sword and the added gust of air sent the barrel mines sailing back the way they came.

"WAAAAH!" the Foxy Pirates on the Behemoth Mother Ship Boaster yelped as their barrel mines drifted back through the starting line towards their ship. "THEY'RE COMING BACK THIS WAY! WAAH! ABANDON SHIP!"

The Foxy Pirates scambled and dove off their ship. Splash! Splash! Splash!

Tnk! The first barrel mine hit the front of the Coaster. KA-BOOOOM! That barrel mine was quickly followed by the others. KA-BOOOOM-BOOOOOM-BOOOOOOM-BOOOOOM!

Ricky yanked the handset away from Itomimizu, "I'll announce it if you won't. The Behemoth Mother Ship Coaster has been blown to smithereens! That means they're out of the race!"

"GIVE THAT BACK!" Itomimizu snapped as he yanked the handset back from Ricky.

Sanji smiled as he watched the barrel mines blow up the Behemoth Mother Ship Coast but then his eyes widened in horror when he saw the huge wave that had resulted from the large collection of explosions.

"MISS. NAMI! MISS. ROBIN!" Sanji called out ahead of them. "LOOK! HIT THE DECK AND HOLD ON TIGHT! WE'VE GOTTA RIDE THIS WAVE!"

SPLOOOOSH! The Behemoth Coaster sank and made the wave get even bigger. KROOOSH! The wave washed right over the starting line and broke it apart.

"AAAAAHH!" Usopp screamed. "WE CAN'T RIDE THAT!"

-x-

Donut Race:

-x-

SPLOOOOOSH! The huge wave rushed forward and swept up the Basically Barrels and the At Least It Floats Boat as it rushed forward.

"YAHOO!" Luffy cheered as their boat surfed on the huge wave. "THIS IS AWESOME!"

Chunk! A piece of wood snapped off of Luffy's sloppy ship.

"Damn it, she's starting to break up on us!" Sanji warned Luffy.

"THIS IS TERRIFYING!" Chopper wailed as he frantically peddled the Basically Barrels.

"Man, that's cold," Zoro noted as crown of the wave curved up over their heads and dripped water down on them.

"WAAAH! NOT GOOD!" one of the Foxy Pirates shrieked as the Swordfish King One and Two were washed up over the wave. SPLOOOSH!

"HANG ON!" Nami shouted to Usopp and Robin. The Barrel Tiger was swept up by the wave and quickly caught up with the other Foxy Pirate boats.

"I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!" Itomimizu cried out from just above the wave. "THE STRAW HAT TEAMS ARE USING THAT WAVE TO ZIP TO THE FRONT OF THE RACE! THIS IS INCREDIBLE FOLKS!"

"No way!" Porche gasped from the front of the pack, "They're about to catch up with us! Let's go Monda! Put every ounce of strength into it!"

SHA! The shark agreed as he started to swim faster.

"HEY YOU GUYS!" Porche called back to the Harem Nocturne and the Party, Love and Pleasure Boat. "We could really use some back up!"

"YEAH!" the men on the Party, Love and Pleasure boat cheered.

"Right!" the ladies on the Harem Nocturne agreed.

WOOOOooooosssshhhh… The wave gave out and Luffy and Chopper's boats slowed to a stop.

"Huff… huff…" Chopper panted as he shrunk back down to his tiny Hybrid form and hung from the handle bar. "It's finally died down."

"But it didn't exactly leave the raft in the best condition," Sanji noted as he eyed the bad condition of the already sloppy ship.

"SHISHISHISHI!" Luffy laughed. "That was fun! I hope something causes another wave!"

"SHUT UP!" Sanji snapped at him. "ANOTHER WAVE WOULD FLATTEN THIS LAME BOAT YOU BUILT! I just hope the girls are okay." Sanji looked right passed Zoro and Chopper on the Basically Barrels and spotted Nami and Robin on the Barrel Tiger. "There they are."

But before they could catch up the Party, Love and Pleasure boat pulled up alongside them.

"You guys looking for a party?" the crew on the Party, Love and Pleasure boat called out.

The Harem Nocturne pulled up on their other side.

"Well hello there gentlemen," the female crew greeted them.

"OOOH!" Sanji gasped with hearts in his eyes at the sight of the sexy Foxy Pirates.

"Huh?" Zoro grunted as he looked up at the Foxy Pirate on the Party, Love and Pleasure boat. "What do you want?" His hand went to his swords.

"Relax guys," the Foy Pirate reassured them. "This is a friendly visit.

"I hope you like fish and noodles," the bartender on the Party, Love and Pleasure boat called out as he set two plates on the counter in front of Luffy. "Free of charge."

"For real?" Luffy questioned. "How cool! Thank you!"

Sanji was in heaven as he found himself as the close embrace of the mint and orange haired female Foxy Pirates.

"Why is it that all the good cooks like you are already taken?" the orange haired woman flirted as she kissed Sanji on the cheek.

"Your curly eyebrows are so cute," the mint haired woman gushed as she practically sat in Sanji's lap.

"Ya know… I've gotta say…" the love-struck cook remarked, "With a crew like this… I won't mind if I get Davy Backed…"

Chopper hid behind his handle bars as one of the male Foxy Pirates smiled down at him.

"You must be exhausted, not to mention hot in that fur coat," he noted.

"IT'S NOT A FUR COAT!" Chopper yelled at him.

"Whoa, easy there, I'm sorry," the Foxy Pirate quickly apologized. "Let me make it up to you. Would a candy apple be a good start?" The Foxy Pirate grinned as he held out a red candy apple to the reindeer.

"What's a candy apple?" Chopper asked. "Is it sweet?"

Tunk! Zoro slammed an empty mug of grog down onto the counter. "Aaah, that's good stuff," he swordsman commented.

"Hey, we need another refill down here," one of the Foxy Pirates that was drinking with Zoro called out to the bartender. "The brew is on us so drink up."

"Thanks," Zoro replied. "You guys are alright."

"UPDATE!" Itomimizu called out as Chirp Chirp circled above the completely stopped Basically Barrels, At Least it Floats Boat, Harem Nocturne and the Party, Love and Pleasure boat. "IT LOOKS LIKE THE PLEASURE BOAT AND THE HAREM NOCTURNE HAVE MADE THEIR MOVE, THE PARTY DISTRACTION. AND THEY'VE LURGED IN TWO STRAW HATS BOATS FOR A KO! WHAT DO YOU SAY TO THAT COLOR COMMENTATOR? HUH? YOUR GUYS FELL FOR IT HOOK, LINE AND SINKER."

Ricky took the handset. "Well they were lost causes from the start. Your guys had better watch out or they'll run out of food and booze. Besides, my boat's still in this race."

Nami stood on the Barrel Tiger and glared back at her ensnared Nakama. "COME ON! WE'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF A RACE YOU JERKS!"

"Heehee," Porche giggled as she smirked back at Nami. "You really shouldn't worry about those guys. If I were you I'd worry about my own boat right now." Porche turned to her fishman companion. "Alright Capote, give 'em a taste of your Fishman Karate."

"YEAH!" Capote cheered. "SURFACE SPLITTER!" Capote slash his arm down and chopped the water behind the Cutie Wagon. Capote used his fistman strength to cut straight through the water and sent a blast racing towards the Barrel Tiger. SLOOOSH!

CHUNK! Robin jumped to the side just as Capote's attack broke off the barrel she had been standing on.

"THE BOAT IS BREAKING APART!" Usopp yell in alarm.

"AAAH!" Nami shrieked as the Barrel Tiger rocked in the wave.

"HEY SANJI!" Ricky shouted into the handset he was still holding. "Wake up! Nami and Robin are in trouble!"

Sanji's eyes snapped open. "MISS. NAM! MISS. ROBIN!" Sanji bolted straight out of the Harem Nocturne and grabbed Luffy's collar and yanked him off the bar and back onto their boat. "Come on! The girls need our help! Let's go!"

"Chopper, let's move!" Zoro instructed as he jumped from the bar to the Basically Barrels.

"Huh?" Chopper asked with a mouth full of candy apple.

Itomimizu tore the handset away from Ricky. "HEY! NO INTERFERING IN THE RACE!"

"DON'T WORRY NAMI! I'M COMING ROBIN!" Sanji called out as he frantically paddled away from the Party Distraction towards the ladies in distress.

"WAIT! DON'T LEAVE US!" the orange haired Foxy Pirate called after him.

"COME BACK!" the blonde Foxy Pirate cried out.

"I'LL NEVER FORGET YOUR CURLY EYEBROW!" the mink haired Foxy Pirate vowed.

"Our balance… we've got to stay balanced…" Usopp warned Nami and Robin as the damaged Barrel Tiger rocked the way and threatened to capsize. Usopp pulled out his slingshot and fired it at Capote. "EAT THIS! FIRE STAR!"

FWOO-swish! Capote swatted Usopp's fire attack away. "No thanks!" he retorted.

Behind Usopp, Robin crossed her arms over her chest. "Ocho Fleur…"

Six arms grew out of Capote's big green body and wrenched his arms back.

"Grrr… what the…" Capote growled as he struggled against Robin's arms.

"Capote!" Porche called out in alarm.

"And FLIP!" The two final arms grew out of Capote's waist and touched the ground. FWIP! The two arms pushed off of the deck of the Cutie Wagon and launched Capote up into the air. WHAM! Capote slammed head first down on top of Monda.

"Perfect!" Nami exclaimed. "Now's our chance! Usopp, jump in the water and pull the boat."

"ARE YOU CRAZY!" Usopp snapped at her.

"Capote, Monda! Get it together!" Porche urged her shark and fishman.

"ALRIGHT FOLKS, CURRENTLY IN THE LEAD IS EVERYONE'S ALL-TIME FAVORITE THE CUTIE WAGON!"

Yoink! Ricky pulled the handset away from Itomimizu. "But Nami, Usopp and Robin in the Barrel Tiger are gaining on them."

"HEY! GET YOUR OWN!" Itamimizu complained as he yanked the handset back. "AND IN THIRD PLACE IS THE CRAB CRANE!"

Ricky leaned in and spoke into the handset anyway, "The At Least It Floats Boat is in fourth and the Basically Barrels is behind them in fifth place!"

-x-

"Okay," Foxy resolved on the shore. "I think it's about time that we get to work, Hamburg."

"Really?" Hamburg asked. "Oh boy, I was hoping you'd say that."

Foxy and Hamburg smirked at each other.

-x-

"Miss. Nami! Miss. Robin! Just hang tight!" Sanji said as he frantically padded the boat. "I'm gonna save you!"

Luffy sat on the back of the boat and stared at Sanji. Then his eyes drifted down and he spotted a broken piece of wood behind the cook.

"I just had the best idea ever!" Luffy announced. "Sanji, throw me that board!"

SHOOOOOM! Second later, the At Least It Floats Boat blasted off like it was a motorboat and streaked through the water.

"WHOA! THIS IS REALLY FAST!" Sanji exclaimed.

"I KNOW! RIGHT?" Luffy agreed as he leaned off the back and propelled the boat forward.

"I'M ON MY WAY!" Sanji shouted. "JUST HOLD ON LADIES!"

-x-

Zoro and Chopper were left behind as Chopper pumped the peddle wheel harder than ever. But they had no way in catching up with whatever Luffy had done to give his boat a big boost.

"We're getting nowhere here," Zoro pointed out. "I'm pretty sure we'd be faster if we paddled."

"Yeah well… the things is…" Chopper told him, "I kind of used the oars to make this handle."

SWIIISH! Zoro stiffened as he heard a boat approaching from behind them. He quickly drew his sword and slashed it. SLISH-SLISH!

SHUNK! The back barrel and the rudder of the Basically Barrels flew off and sunk onto the hard, pointed bows of the Swordfish King One and Two.

Zoro leaned back against the handrail while Chopper stared at the Foxy Pirates in shock.

"WHAT?" Chopper gasped. If Zoro hadn't shot the barrel onto those sharp points those sharp points would have gone through them.

"Heh heh heh," the Foxy Pirates chuckled.

SKISH! Zoro jumped from the Basically Barrels and landed on the front of Swordfish King One and Two.

"Not even a hello, huh?" Zoro remarked as he surveyed the six attacking Foxy Pirates.

"Not our style," the Foxy Pirate in the front of Swordfish King Two retorted. "We believe in winning any way we can."

"Really?" Zoro questioned. "Well, in that case…" Zoro drew two of his swords and crossed his arms. The blades were pointed outward like the horns of a bull. "BULL NEEDLES!" SLISH-SLISH-SLISH-SLISH-SLISH-SLISH! Zoro lunged forward and jabbed his swords into the six Foxy Pirates and their two ships.

KROOOOM! Swordfish King One and Two broke apart and the crew dropped into the water. Splash! Zoro landed in the water behind the wreckage he'd left in his wake.

"GO ZORO!" Chopper cheered as Zoro's short green hair broke the surface and looked just like the moss ball that Sanji always called him.

"GRR…" the lead Foxy Pirate on Swordfish King Two growled as he clung to the broken front of his ship. "If we're goin' down we're taking you with us!" BANG! He fired the pointed nose from Swordfish King Two at the Basically Barrels.

"CHOPPER! LOOK OUT!" Zoro warned the reindeer.

BOOOOOM! Swordfish King Two's nose pierced through the Basically Barrels and broke it to pieces. Chopper went crashing down into the sea with the wreckage of his ship. SPLASH!

Sploosh… Zoro dove underwater after Chopper.

"THE BASICALLY BARRELS AND THE SWORDFISH KING BOATS HAVE BEEN SUNK! THEY'RE ALL OFFICIALLY DISQUALIFIED!"

Splish! Zoro broke the surface with Chopper in his arms, "You okay?"

"They broke my boat… "Chopper cried. "I worked so hard on it."

"Hey, but you're okay so that's what matters," Zoro reminded him.

"Right, thank you Zoro," Chopper replied.

-x-

"You hear that?" Usopp asked Nami and Robin. "They're out of the race."

"Which means… we're our only hope…" Nami moped.

Robin seemed unconcerned as she was now sitting on the fin casually reading a book.

"Wait a sec!" Nami suddenly perked up. "Why don't we just use one of your Dials?"

"Oh, good idea!" Usopp agreed as he pulled out a shell. "We can give this Breath Dial a shot."

Usopp looked down and pressed Dial against the back of the Barrel Tiger with the opening facing outward.

CHUNK! "YAAAAAAHHH!" Usopp yelled in pain as a crab claw snapped closed on his wrist. He dropped the Dial and lurched backwards.

"USOPP!" Nami cried out in alarm. She looked passed him to see the Crab Crane and the three grinning Foxy Pirates that were driving it.

"Nice try!" one of the Foxy Pirates taunted. "But no one finished this race but Porche!"

"You… you…" Usopp stammered as he held his bloody wrist.

"Aw, is the baby gonna cry?" another Foxy Pirate mocked him.

"YOU MADE ME DROP MY DIAL!" Usopp yelled. "DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT WE HAD TO GO THROUGH TO GET THOSE THINGS?"

"Dial?" the first Foxy Pirate repeated. "You mean that shell? Ha! I knew it looked important. We were aiming to take your hand off but I guess making you lose your toy works too."

"TAKE THIS!" Usopp snapped as he pulled out his slingshot, "EXPLODING STAR!" Shoo! Usopp fired a round and it impacted with the middle of the Crab Crane, KA-BOOOOOOM! The Crab Crane exploded and the three Foxy Pirates dropped into the water.

"Whoa, Usopp!" Nami gasped. "What was that?"

"Oh, sorry," Usopp apologized. "I didn't mean to lose my cool."

"No, that was incredible!" Nami insisted.

Chirp Chirp flew overhead.

"THE CRAB CRANE HAS BEEN DESTROYED AND IS NOW DISQUALIFIED!"

Ricky pulled the handset away from Itomimizu, "Way to go Usopp. The Pleasure Boat and the Harem Nocture have dropped out of the race. So that means the only ones left are Porche and the Cutie Wagon, Nami, Usopp and Robin in the Barrel Tiger and Luffy and Sanji that are coming in fast with the At Least It Floats Boat"

"Alright so it's down to us and that chick with the fishman," Nami resolved. "Usopp, do you have another Dial to catch up with them? Maybe a Jet Dial?"

"Are you kidding?" Usopp exclaimed. "Do you know how rare those are?"

"How about an Impact Dial?" Robin suggested.

"You know… I think I must have left it back on the Merry," Usopp replied.

"…" Robin stared silently at Usopp.

"WHAT?" Usopp demanded. "You don't believe me? Oh come on! Do you genuinely think that I would lie about something this important? We're talking about losing one of our Nakama!"

"I didn't say anything," Robin stated.

"He's right," Nami said. "If we lose I just know they'll take me first. I just know it. Why do I have to be so cute?"

"You could always try winning," a voice overhead suggested.

"YOU STAY OUT OF THIS!" Nami shouted up at him. "NOBODY ASKED YOU!"

Swiff! Robin casually sat down and went back to her book.

"Robin!" Nami complained, "This isn't the time to be reading!"

"I'm rowing too," Robin pointed out. She was using four extra arms to control Nami and Usopp's oars and paddle the Barrel Tiger forward.

"Well yeah, your hands are," Nami agreed, "But you're not really focused on it."

"This is important Robin!" Usopp insisted. "You've gotta work hard."

"I am working hard," Robin reminded him as she continued to multitask with paddling the boat and reading her book.

"Yeah, working hard at archeology," Usopp argued.

Up ahead, Porche twirled a baton and turned to Capote. "What do you think? Should we head for the finish line or should we enjoy sinking them first?"

"I enjoy casually strolling through the finish line as much as the next guy," Capote admitted, "But I want to make that woman suffer. Simply winning this thing ain't gonna be enough for me anymore."

"AND THE RACE HAS OFFICIALLY ENTERED ITS CLIMACTIC MOMENTS!"

"He means all the fodder have been removed and its down to the ones that were going to win it from the beginning."

"SHUT UP! THE CUTIE WAGON IS HOLDING ONTO ITS LEAD SPOT BUT THE BARREL TIGER IS RIGHT BEHIND 'EM, AND THE AT LEAST IT FLOATS BOAT IS… HEY… WHERE'D THE AT LEAST IT FLOATS BOAT GO?"

SHOOOOOM! The Luffy-propelled At Least It Floats Boat surged passed the Barrel Tiger. Sanji held back his oar which Nami grabbed and allowed the fast boat to pull them along.

WOOOOOOSH! The At Least It Floats Boat caught up with the Cutie Wagon.

"Fancy meeting you here," Sanji greeted Porche with a suave smile as they went passed.

"SEE YA, CHUMPS!" Nami taunted as the Barrel Tiger whizzed by after Luffy.

"HOW ARE THEY EVEN GOING SO FAST?" Porche exclaimed.

"Waaaahhh…" the Luffy-motor suddenly groaned. "No more strength…"

SHOOOooooooommm… The two Straw Hat boats slowed to a complete stop.

Luffy lumped over the end of the boat while his twisted rubber arms and broken board that he'd been using as a propeller dangled in the sea water.

"Gum Gum Screw…" Luffy mumbled as the contact with the water finally took its toll on him. "Fast but no fast no more… Sleep now…"

"I think he's given it all he's got," Robin observed.

"Hey, we've better get to paddling before we lose our edge!" Usopp reminded them.

SWOOOOOOSH! Monda shot passed them with the Cutie Wagon in tow. Capote was now seated in the back and had taken up the oars to increase their speed.

"Thanks for handing first place to us!" Porche mocked the Straw Hats as they went passed.

"Aw man," Nami complained. "And we just passed those guys."

"Hahaha!" Capote laughed as he paddled from the back of the Cutie Wagon. "And that's the last time you'll even see us! Huh? WHAT THE?"

Capote looked down to see that Robin had used a chain of arms to grab onto the back of the Cutie Wagon. Now the Foxy Pirates were dragging the two Straw Hat ships along behind them.

"How's this work for you?" Robin asked.

"Excellent Robin!" Nami cheered.

"THAT IS DOWN RIGHT CHEATING!" Capote yelled. The swordfish fishman pulled out a sword and swung at Robin's arm chain. "LET GO!" SWISH! Robin's arms disappeared and the fishman was overbalanced from his swing and toppled into the water. SPLOOSH!

"It's too bad they noticed so quickly," Robin remarked.

"Capote, no!" Porche cried out as she ran to back of the Cutie Wagon and peered into the water for any signs of the fishman.

SPLOOSH! Capote broke the surface and looked furious. "RAAH!" he roared. "THEY'RE GONNA PAY!"

"Are you guys ready to go again?" Nami turned and asked Sanji and… "Luffy?"

Luffy was still slumped mostly unconscious on the back of his boat.

"I get the feeling he's gonna be like this for a while," Sanji noted.

"Let's just keep paddling with all we've got," Usopp tried to rally the team. "We've got to catch up with 'em before they get an even bigger lead on us!"

"You're right," Nami agreed. "Let's paddle."

"I guess we'll be sinking them after all," Porche resolved as she spun her gold baton. A very wet Capote was behind her on the Cutie Wagon.

"OOOH!" Itomimizu gasped, "THEY'RE NOW APPROACHING THE MOST FEARSOME OBSTACLES ON THE COURSE. FIRST IS THE LONG CORAL REEF AND JUST BEYOND THAT FORBODING AND DIFFICULT PATCH IS THE DREADED LONG RING WHIRLPOOL OF LONG CAPE!"

Up ahead of the three boats was a coral reef with long pink coral that stuck out of the water for a good fifteen feet. Passed the coral reef was a large dark whirlpool and a patch of land that jutted out from the island.

"OH AND WELL I'LL BE… TALK ABOUT UNEXPECTED!"

Yoink! "Guys, you've got company! I don't think they're here just to get a closer view."

"What now?" Robin wondered. The Straw Hats looked towards the shore and a cloud of dust. The cloud was being kicked up by Hamburg as he ran along the shore line on all fours with Foxy riding on his back.

"GIMME THAT! IT'S 'FULL DASH' HAMBURG AT FULL SPEED! AND RIDING ATOP HIM IS THE MASTER OF OBSTRUCTION HIMSELF, THE SCURGE OF FAIRNESS AND THE GREATEST SCOUNDREL OF ALL TIME, OUR BOSS: SILVER FOX FOXY!"

"It's him!" Nami realized as she stared at the Foxy Pirates Captain as he rode along the shore.

"I've just come up with a brilliant idea," Foxy boasted.

"From that flattering description the loudmouth just gave, it looks like you guys are going to have to deal with some interference."

-x-

Interference:

-x-

"THIS RACE IS REALLY HEATING UP!" Itomimizu announced from overhead. "THE NEXT COURSE OBSTACLE THE LONG CORAL REEF IS DEAD AHEAD! LEADING THE RACE IS PORCHE AND THE CUTIE WAGON! PERSUING CLOSE BEHIND ARE THE STRAW HATS IN THE BARREL TIGER AND AT LEAST IT FLOATS!"

"Whoa, they're like Chopper's antlers!" Luffy remarked as he eyed the tall tree-like pieces of pink coral up ahead. He had recovered from his contact with the water and was now paddling his sloppy boat along with Sanji.

"Why is the coral in this reef so long?" Robin wondered.

"And why's it sticking out like that?" Sanji added. "Let's just get through it."

"Look," Nami pointed out. "The reef is causing some unusual currents to form." Under Nami's direction the Straw Hats stared ahead of them and noted the currents that were swirling around the large pieces of coral. "Going in blind's not a good idea."

"Ugh, I can't believe this stupid race has lasted this long," Porche complained.

"We're counting on you Monda," Capote urged the star shark.

SHIII Monda put on a burst of speed and surged ahead towards the Long Coral Reef.

"AND DON'T FORGET!" Itomimizu added, "THERE'S SOMEONE ON LAND LOOKING FOR EVERY OPPORTUNITY TO SABATAGE THIS RACE! OUR BOSS, SILVER FOX FOXY!"

"Are you sure that's legal?" Ricky asked as he leaned in towards the handset.

"OF COURSE IT IS! EVERYTHING'S LEGAL IN THE DONUT RACE!"

"It doesn't seem very sportsman-like though. He wants to get involved but he's too scared to actually compete. Sounds like Foxy's a chicken."

"YOU TAKE THAT BACK!" Foxy shouted up into the air. "I'M NOT SCARED!"

"Pupupupu," Hamburg laughed, "I think he hit the nail on the head…"

"HE'S JUST KIDDING SIR!" Itomimizu reassured the self-conscious Captain. "WE ALL LOVE YOUR ANTICS AND HOW YOU'RE ALWAYS THERE TO SUPPORT US! I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE WHAT YOU HAVE IN STORE FOR US!"

Foxy perked back up and laughed, "Fehfehfehfeh! I've got something special in store for those Straw Hats!"

"Yeah! Get 'em boss!" the Foxy Pirates cheered as they listened to the race from the carnival at the starting line.

"WAIT! WHAT'S THIS? THE STRAW HATS ARE SLOWING DOWN."

"Come on Nami!" Usopp urged the navigator. "Keep rowing!"

"Not yet," Nami told him.

"Not yet?" Usopp repeated. "They're getting even further ahead of us!"

"I know, okay," Nami replied, "We're not going in yet." She turned and looked back at the Captain and the cook. "Sanji, you wait here too."

"Anything you say, Nami-dear!" Sanji happily agreed.

"THE CUTIE WAGON TAKES ADVANTAGE OF THIS OPPORTUNITY AND PLUNGES FORWARD INTO THE LONG CORAL REEF."

"LET'S GO MONDA!" Porche called out.

SHIII! Monda sailed ahead into the forest of pink coral.

SWISH! But the strong spiraling currents took control of the Cutie Wagon and whipped it around the coral.

"WAH! WHAT'S HAPPENING?" Porche yelped.

SWOOOOSH! The current spat the Cutie Wagon right back out of the coral.

"Huh, they came back," Usopp noted.

"WHAAAT? THE CUTIE WAGON HAS BEEN PUSHED BACK OUT OF THE REEF! WHAT'S HAPPENING DOWN THERE?"

"Don't look at me. When it comes to navigation that brilliant woman is on a whole different level. The rest of us just hang on for the ride."

"I don't understand!" Porche whined. "What happened?"

"See, I knew there was something weird about those currents," Nami pointed out. "NOW! LET'S GET GOING USOPP!"

"Right," Usopp agreed as he started paddling.

"YOU TOO SANJI!" Nami called out behind them. "Pick up the pace and follow me!"

"Aye-aye!" Sanji replied as he and Luffy started to paddle after the others.

"Let's try this again Monda," Porche prompted the star shark.

"Come on!" Nami ordered Usopp as they paddled passed the Cutie Wagon.

"WHAT'S THIS? THE STRAW HATS ARE PICKING UP SPEED. ALL THREE BOATS ARE ABOUT TO ENTER THE LONG CORAL REEF AT THE SAME TIME."

The three boats entered the coral reef but only one was immediately spat back out.

"WHY DOES THAT KEEP HAPPENING?" Porche demanded.

"WOW! THE BARREL TIGER AND AT LEAST IT FLOATS HAVEN'T BEEN PUSHED BACK OUT."

Foxy stood on the shore and watched the two Straw Hat boats snake their way through the forest of tall pink coral.

SHOOO! An arrow was shot from the shore and hit a piece of coral ahead of the Barrel Tiger. FWOOOOOSH! A thick cloud of smoke sprayed out from the arrow and covered the reef.

"HEY! I CAN'T SEE!" Usopp exclaimed.

"Fehfehfehfeh!" Foxy laughed as he stood on shore with his bow.

"HA-HA! THERE IT IS! THE DEVILISH INTERFERENCE WE'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR."

"You've gotta be kidding," Sanji complained. "What's that idiot up to?"

"Hey, I can't see where we're going," Luffy pointed out.

"And there you have it!" Foxy boasted. "Operation White Out is a success! Let's see how you navigate through that reef WHEN YOU CAN'T EVEN SEE IT!"

"You sure it worked?" Hamburg asked. "Pupupupu!"

WHISH! The two Straw Hat boats sailed straight out of the smoke cloud and further into the Long Coral Reef.

"WHAT THE HELL?" Foxy's eyes bugged out as he watched his brilliant plan go up in smoke. Well, it was supposed to go up in smoke but it hadn't worked.

"THEY MADE IT THROUGH WITH NO TROUBLE AT ALL! HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE?"

"Pupupupu!" Hambrug laughed and pounded the ground with his hand. "I called it!"

"Hey Foxy, if that's the kind of lame interference we can count on from you, I don't know why I was worried."

"He… he thought my plan was lame…" Foxy whimpered and hung his head.

"INCREDIBLE! THE STRAW HATS ARE SAILING THROUGH THE LONG CORAL REEF WITH EASE!"

"And the Cutie Wagon still can't even make it more than five feet in."

"YOU SHUT UP!"

"Hey, the boat is moving on its own," Usopp realized. He and Nami had stopped paddling as the Barrel Tiger weaved its way through the forest of coral. "What's going on here Nami?"

"This place is a maze of currents," Nami explained. "That giant whirlpool ahead of us is causing smaller whirlpools to form in the reef. That's what's causing these strange currents. So it doesn't matter if we can't see. Their course won't change. We took the right entrance so the currents will guide the boat along all by themselves."

"INCREDIBLE!" Usopp exclaimed. "You're a miracle! That's what you get when you've got the Best Navigator in the Grand Line on your crew! TAKE THAT!"

"NAMI-SWAN!" Sanji practically sang. "YOU'RE AMAZING!"

"And thanks to Nami the Barrel Tiger and At Least It Floats have taken the two top spots while the Cutie Wagon has fallen all the way back to third place."

"I SAID SHUT UP! THEY WON'T BE CELEBRATING FOR LONG! ONCE THEY'RE OUT OF THE REEF THEY'LL HEAD STRAIGHT INTO THE LONG RING WHIRLPOOL!"

"Long reef, long ring," Usopp muttered, "It's just one long thing after another!"

"Alright Usopp, hurry up and use it," Nami prompted.

"Use what?" Usopp asked.

"The Impact Dial," Nami replied.

"But I don't have it with me though!" Usopp insisted. "Nononono!"

"Oh yeah?" Nami retorted, "Then what's this?" Nami pulled out the Impact Dial that she'd stolen out of Usopp's bag when he hadn't been looking.

"What the-when did-how did you…" Usopp sputtered as Nami shoved the Dial up against his long nose.

"Come on," Nami said, "If you don't use it soon we'll be sucked down into that giant whirlpool."

"But those things are supposed to hurt the person that uses them!" Usopp protested. "If I use it I'll break my shoulder!"

"That's a risk I'm willing to take," Nami told him.

"THAT'S BECAUSE ITS MY SHOULDER!" Usopp snapped.

"Impact Dial!" Luffy and Sanji encouraged Usopp from behind.

"Come on!" Nami urged him. "We're running out of time here!"

"So that's why you've been acting so calm!" Usopp realized. "You've had this planned from the very beginning didn't you?"

"If you don't do it we'll die!" Nami reminded him.

"Well… it's been a nice life…" Usopp whimpered.

Robin stood up and crossed her arms, "Viente Fleur…" A long chain of arms sprouted out of the back of the Barrel Tiger and grabbed onto At Least it Floats. "Now, do it Mr. Long Nose."

"Do it my butt…" Usopp growled, "Fine then…" Usopp stretched his hand down and slapped the Dial against the back of the Barrel Tiger. "IMPACT!"

SHOOOOOM! The Barrel Tiger was blasted forward into the whirlpool and dragged Luffy and Sanji along behind them.

"THE BARREL TIGER AND AT LEAST IT FLOATS HAVE PICKED UP SOME TREMENDOUS SPEED!"

"Way to take one for the team Usopp."

"WAIT! THEY HAVEN'T JUST INCREASED SPEED! THEY'RE FLYING!"

WHOOOOOSH! The two Straw Hat boats flew straight over the eye of the whirlpool and quickly cleared the rest of it.

The Barrel Tiger arced up over the top of the long stretch of land behind the whirlpool.

"THEY'RE LEAPING RIGHT OVER LONG CAPE!"

"And the Cutie Wagon still hasn't even made it into the Long Coral Reef. The Straw Hats are going to win this race with a one-two finish."

KRAK! "Ah!" Sanji gasped as the worn wood at the front of At Least It Floats broke off in Robin's extra hands. "Oh crap!" With the Barrel Tiger no longer pulling them along, Luffy and Sanji started to plummet downward. "OHCRAPOHCRAPOHCRAP! THIS ISN'T GOOD! WAAAH!"

"Oops, it broke," Robin remarked.

SPLOOSH! The Barrel Tiger splashed down on the far side of Long Cape while At Least It Floats crashed down on Long Cape and broke apart. KROOOSH!

"HA-HA! THERE GOES YOUR ONE TWO FINISH! AT LEAST IT FLOATS HAS CRASHED ON LONG CAPE AND BROKEN INTO PIECES. IT CAN NO LONGER CONTINUE THE RACE. THEY'RE NOW DISQUALIFIED."

"I'm so sorry, Nami, my dear!" Sanji called after the Barrel Tiger. "Don't worry about us! Just continue the race!"

"Okay, we will," Nami replied. She grabbed a paddle while Robin grabbed the other and they paddled off ahead.

"When you think about it this race was always going to come down to the Barrel Tiger and the Cutie Wagon. After that last maneuver the Straw Hats have gained a huge lead. They've cleared all three obstacles while the Cutie Wagon hasn't even gotten through the Long Coral Reef yet."

Porche and Capote glared up at the Super Sparrow and the Straw Hat commentator.

"We were way too easy on them!" Capote growled. "Hang on tight Porche!"

"I'm counting on you," Porche replied.

SKISH! Capote leapt off the front of the Cutie Wagon. "COMBINE! TWO FISH ENGINE!" Capote came down and landed in Monda's mouth. The swordfish fishman started to paddle his big green arms while the star shark flailed its fins and along with him.

SHOOOOOOM! With the power of a fishman and a shark combined the Cutie Wagon surged into the Long Coral Reef and tore through the currents like they were nothing.

"HA-HA! SEE THAT? THEY'RE NOT OUT OF THE RACE YET! USING FISHMAN MUSCLE AND THE FINS OF A SHARK THE CUTIE WAGON HAS DOUBLED ITS SPEED! THEY'RE BLAZING THROUGH THE CORAL AND CLOSING THE GAP! THIS RACE IS FAR FROM OVER!"

"USOPP!" Nami yelled down at the sniper as she and Robin's extra arms paddled their boat. "GET UP AND START PADDLING!"

"Your arm seems to be bending the wrong way," Robin noted.

"WAAAAH!" Usopp screamed. One arm was nearly broken while the other wrist was still bleeding from getting clamped by the Crab Crane. "Now both my arms are hurt!"

"What is that?" Robin asked as she stared off the front of the boat.

Nami turned to look and saw a wooden sign in the water in front of them that read 'Donut Race – Turn Right'. "It looks like a course marker."

"Turn right…" Robin recited.

"Huh, I guess we'll turn right then," Nami remarked. WHAM! She lashed out and smashed her fist through the sigh. "LIKE HELL WE WILL!"

"Gaah!" Foxy gasped as his fake sign went flying passed his head.

"SHE BROKE IT! OUR BOSS' PLOY NUMBER 18: OPERATION FAKE DETOUR HAS FAILED! WHAT A FORMIDABLE WOMAN. DOES SHE NOT BELIEVE IN ANYTHING IN THIS WORLD?"

"CAN IT JACKASS!" Nami yelled up at the announcer.

"A weak trick like that will never work on Nami. She saw right through it."

"YOU SHUT UP TOO, BASTARD!" Nami snapped.

"Hey, don't rope me in with him."

"WOW, AND SHE'S FOUL MOUTHED TOO. THE RACE CONTINUES WITH THE BARREL TIGER MAINTAINING ITS STRONG LEAD."

SPLOOSH! Suddenly a jet of water shot up in front of the Barrel Tiger like a geyser.

"WAH!" Usopp yelped as the Barrel Tiger shot upward then came down and was immediately blasted back up by another tall geyser. SPLOOOSH!

"WHAT ARE THESE COLUMNS OF WATER?" Nami shrieked in alarm as the Barrel Tiger was blasted up and down by a series of the geyser like waves.

"THEY ARE NOW CLEARING THE LONG WAVES. THOSE ARE THE SIGNATURE WAVES AROUND LONG RING LONG LAND THAT REACH HIGH INTO THE SKY!"

"Is that supposed to be natural?" Usopp wondered once they had finally cleared the long waves.

"Oh grandma…" An ugly little boy that looked a lot like Hamburg was crying on the shore as he knelt over his sick grandma who had Foxy's signature nose. "Oh boss—I mean, oh grandma…"

"Ahhh… my time on this earth is over…" 'grandma' groaned on the ground.

"THE BOSS UNLEASHES HIS THIRD NASTY TRICK!"

Nami sailed the Barrel Tiger right passed the crying boy and his grandma.

"HEY! DYING OLD LADY OVER HERE!" 'grandma' shouted after them.

"UNBELIEVABLE! SHE COMPLETELY IGNORED A CHILD AND HIS SICK GRANDMOTHER. WHAT A COLD HEARTED ICE QUEEN!"

"I TOLD YOU TO CAN IT!" Nami spat. "I'D NEVER FALL FOR A RIDICULOUS TRICK LIKE THAT!"

"I'm not allowed to call her cute anymore so I'll just say she's feisty."

"DAMN RIGHT YOU'RE NOT!" Nami snapped.

"HEY LOOK!" Usopp exclaimed. "It's the finish line!" Up ahead was a banner that read 'GOAL' in big red letters. The crowd was strangely absent.

"THIS RACE WILL SOON BE DECIDED!"

"NOT SO FAST!" Porche called out. The Cutie Wagon had cleared the other obstacles while the Straw Hats were dealing with Foxy's antics and now the Barrel Tiger's lead was shrinking.

"THE CUTIE WAGON IS CLOSING IN QUICKLY! THESE ARE THE FINAL MOMENTS OF ROUND ONE'S DONUT RACE! WHO… WILL… WIN?"

-x-

Foxy the Silver Fox:

-x-

"WHO… WILL… WIN?"

"I already told you…" Nami sang, "THESE LAME TRICKS WON'T WORK!" KRACK! Nami lashed out her fist and broke one of the support beams for the 'GOAL' banner.

"Aah-aahh…" Foxy gaped in shock on the shore as Nami completely no-sold his fake banner.

"Pupupupu!" Hamburg found the whole situation hilarious and laughed behind Foxy's back.

"SHE EVEN SEES THROUGH OPERATION FAKE GOAL! FORMIDABLE! TRULY FORMIDABLE!"

"COME ON!" Nami barked at Usopp as they paddled through the fake goal sign and continued the race.

"AND NOW, I HAVE A QUESTION FOR HER!" Itomimizu announced as Chirp Chirp flew over the Barrel Tiger. "WHAT IS IT LIKE TO GO THROUGH LIFE SO JADED?"

"PISS OFF!" Nami yelled up at the loud mouth announcer.

"IT'S TOO LATER FOR HER! HER HEART IS COLD! SHE HAS NO SOUL!"

"You know, she's been a major bitch to me lately so part of me thinks I should let those comments slide. But on the other hand…"

POW!

"WAAAAAHHH!" Itomimizu screamed as he went flying off of Chirp Chirp. KRASH! And landed on the Barrel Tiger.

Nami stood in front of him with an evil aura flaring around her.

"HEY! I WAS JUST KIDDING!" Itomimizu assured her. "BUT IF YOU ATTACK ME YOU'LL JUST BE PROVING ME RIGHT!"

Swish-swish! Nami swung her paddle like a bow staff then spun and drove the flat end into the loud mouthed announcer's face. KER-RACK! Itomimizu went flying off of the Barrel Tiger and crashed down onto the shore of Long Ring Long Land unconscious. WHUMP!

"What a slobber knocker!" Ricky commented up on Chirp Chirp with Itomimizu's Snail. "It appears that Itomimizu has fallen off the sparrow and is now unconscious. I guess this means that I'll have to take over on commentary for the remainder of the race. Let's go bird, you've still got a job to do."

"That was sweet of him," Robin remarked. Nami spun around to stare at her, "He practically giftwrapped that loud mouth for you."

"Whatever," Nami wrote it off, "Let's get back to the race."

"The real goal must me nearby," Robin reasoned. "We're getting close."

"I'm not using that Dial again!" Usopp insisted. His arm had only just recovered.

"Yeah, yeah, I know," Nami replied.

"The Barrel Tiger is racing towards the goal. But it looks like there actually is someone stupid enough to fall for that fake goal scheme. The Cutie Wagon has come to a complete stop. Talk about your all-time backfires."

"Wait? What's going on?" Porche questioned as she stared at the fake goal line in confusion. "Who won the race?"

"Where did everybody go?" Capote wondered.

"Looks like the only ones stupid enough to fall for that fake goal are the Foxy Crew."

"WHAT? YOU MEAN THIS GOAL IS A FAKE?" Porche shrieked.

"WHO WOULD DO SOMETHING SO EVIL?" Capote demanded.

"He… he called my tricks stupid…" Foxy whimpered as he slumped on the ground.

"Maybe they are, none of them worked," Hamburg pointed out. "Pupupupupu!"

"Those guys are complete idiots!" Nami remarked as she and Usopp frantically paddled. "I'd die of embarrassment if I lost to one of them."

"They'd take one of our crew too!" Usopp reminded Nami of. "That's worse!"

"The Barrel Tiger has increased their lead and according to this map that Itomimizu left behind, they are now approaching the Long Bamboo Cape. The real goal is just beyond it. The Straw Hats are in the home stretch!"

"What do you know, he's right," Nami realized, "There's the finish line!"

"WAIT UP!" Porche shouted as she raced after the Barrel Tiger. Monda was still pulling the Cutie Wagon but Capote had gone back to paddling from the back.

"THEY'RE CATCHING UP TO US!" Usopp exclaimed.

"There's no way we'll beat them at this speed," Robin pointed out.

"I've got an idea," Nami announced, "Usopp, can you shoot down that bamboo?"

"Bamboo?" Usopp repeated. "Sure." Usopp drew his slingshot and stretched it back. "Alright!" BOOM! BOOM! Usopp rounds exploded and two of the thirty foot high bamboo stalks started to fall over. "Like that?"

"Yeah, but more!" Nami instructed.

"CAPOTE! MONDA! MOVE IT!" Porche yelled. "FULL SPEED AHEAD! WE'LL RAM THEM AND SINK THAT STUPID BOAT TO THE BOTTOM OF THE OCEAN!"

SHOO! Usopp fired another batch of exploding rounds from his slingshot. BOOM-BOOOM-BOOOM-BOOOM-BOOOM! The rounds exploded and toppled another bunch of bamboo. "TAKE THAT!"

"WAAAAHH!" Porche wailed as they passed underneath the falling bamboo. KRASH-SPLOOSH! The tall bamboo stalks crashed down onto and all around the Cutie Wagon.

"BINGO!" Nami cheered.

"Thanks to some skillful shooting from sniper Usopp, the Straw Hats have slowed down the Cutie Wagon using the long bamboo. It looks like they knocked out that fishman!"

"Oh no! Capote!" Porche gasped as she knelt over the unconscious swordfish fishman. He had a large lump on his head. "Say something!" Porche growled as she glared after the Barrel Tiger. "I'VE HAD IT! THEY'RE GONNA PAY FOR THIS!"

"Heads up guys, I think she's using that baton of hers as a weapon."

"CUTIE BATON!" Porche shouted as she spun her gold baton around at her side. A dozen roses flew out from the baton.

"What's that?" Usopp asked as they looked back at Porche. "Some kind of magic flower trick?"

"FLOWER SHURIKEN!" WOOOSH! Porche lashed out her baton and sent the flowers flying ahead of her at the Straw Hats.

"Oh, Flower Shirken-WAAH! FLOWER SHURIKEN!" Usopp yelped as sharp blades popped out of the flowers as they flew at the Barrel Tiger. "LOOK OUT!"

WHUP! WHISH! SHUNK! Nami dove for cover while Usopp held his arsenal bag up in front of his face. But while the Straw Hats had managed to avoid getting hit one of the shuriken had pierced through the back of the Barrel Tiger.

"Oh no," Robin gasped as water flowed through the hole. "We've sprung a leak!"

"The Barrel Tiger's been hit. They're taking on water!"

"Don't worry, we can make it," Nami insisted. "We're almost to the goal! Keep paddling!"

Up ahead was the Foxy Pirates' ship the Sexy Foxy. The real goal banner was just ahead of it.

"Both boats have made it almost all the way around the island. The finish is in sight. The first round of the Davy Back Fight is quickly coming to an end!"

"COME ON PORCHE!" the Foxy Pirates on the shore cheered on the Crew Idol.

"Keep going Monda!" Porche encouraged the star shark while Capote still laid unconscious behind her. "We can't let them beat us!"

SHIIII! Monda shrieked and put on another burst of speed.

"We're going to lose if we don't do something!" Foxy said as he rode Hamburg along the shore. "Bring us up alongside them!"

"Right boss," Hamburg agreed.

"I can't see!" Chopper complained as he jumped and tried to see over the crowd of Foxy Pirates at the finish line. Zoro sat nearby and drank some grog.

"Made it just in time," Sanji remarked as he and Luffy pushed through the crowd.

"Alright!" Luffy cheered. "Nami's team is winning!"

"Robin-baby! Nami-my darling!" Sanji swooned, "You look so hot when you're going fast!"

Chopper managed to crawl through a Foxy Pirate's legs and popped up next to Luffy.

"Man, you guys almost won," the Foxy Pirate commented with a smug grin.

"What do you mean?" Luffy challenged him. "We're totally gonna win."

"Hahaha!" another Foxy Pirate laughed. "Not so fast. Look over there. Our boss is coming."

"Yeah? So what?" Luffy questioned. "What can he do?"

"Our boss is like you," the second Foxy Pirate explained. "He has Devil Fruit Powers."

"Look out guys! You've got company! And it's not the Cutie Wagon!"

On Ricky's warning, Nami turned and spotted Foxy running along the shore.

"What's he doing?" Nami wondered.

Foxy sat on top of Hamburg and held out his hand with his middle ring fingers touching his thumbs and his index and pinky fingers extended upward. The tips of his fingers glowed purple.

"SLOW SLOW BEAM!"

"LOOK OUT! HE'S FIRING A BEAM!"

"A beam? COOL!" Usopp exclaimed.

"Not cool!" Nami snapped. "It's coming right for us!"

The purple beam flew out and engulfed the Barrel Tiger before they could dodge. FWOOSH!

Monda surged through the finish line and pulled the Cutie Wagon after him.

"And the winner is… the Cutie Wagon…"

"YEAH!" the Foxy Pirates cheered as Porche crossed the finish line. Capote was still unconscious. "PORCHE'S THE HERO OF THE RACE! THAT'S OUR IDOL!"

"Thanks everyone!" Porche gushed as she waved to her adoring crew. "It's only natural I won!"

"Looks like we're about to get a new crew member!" a Foxy Pirate boasted.

"There's no one that can beat the Foxy Pirates!" another Foxy Pirate bragged. "We always win."

Nami, Usopp and Robin panted just short of the finish line.

"FEHFEHFEHFEH!" Foxy laughed. "NOW YOU GUYS HAVE TO PAY UP! WE'RE TAKING ONE OF YOUR CREW!"

"Are you guys alright?" Chopper asked one the Barrel Tiger crew had been brought ashore. "Is everybody okay?"

"We're alright," Robin confirmed.

"What the heck happened out there?" Luffy asked.

"I'd like to know the same thing," Nami answered.

"We'd all like to know what happened," Usopp added, "Did we really lose somehow?"

SWOOOSH! Chirp Chirp swooped down and Ricky hopped off of the Super Sparrow's back.

"Foxy hit you guys with that beam and you just slowed down," Ricky explained. "Porche passed you while you were basically standing still five feet away from the finish line."

"Fehfehfehfehfeh!" Foxy laughed as he strutted over to the Straw Hats. "That's what happens when anything get hits with my Slowmo Photons."

"What'd you do to Nami's team you smug bastard!" Sanji snarled,

"What's a slow-mo pho-tone?" Luffy asked.

"They are particles unlike any other known to modern science," Foxy answered. He held off his hands in the familiar pose and his finger-tips glowed purple. "Whatever this light touches be it an animal, a liquid, a solid or even a gas will lose a fixed amount of its velocity while simultaneously losing all its other energy."

"You're dumb," Luffy said. "That makes no sense at all."

"He… he called me dumb…" Foxy moped and cried.

"Oh sir, are you okay!" Porche gushed as she ran over and passed Foxy on the back.

"Luffy, he ate a Devil Fruit," Ricky told him. "He can make beams out of slowmo photons which slow down everything that they touch."

"Oh, that makes sense," Luffy replied. "Why didn't he just say that from the beginning?"

"No it doesn't!" Nami snapped. "Something like that is impossible!"

"Have you ever known a Devil Fruit to make sense?" Ricky pointed out. "This is the Grand Line. Impossible things happen here all the time."

"Now I'm a Slow-Motion Man!" Foxy bragged, "Observe!"

BANG! Hamburg fired a bazooka at Foxy from nearby.

Foxy held out his hand and fired a purple beam of slowmo photons at the approaching cannonball. FWOOSH!

The cannonball slowed to a near stop and hung in the air as it slowly drifted forward.

"GAH! A FLOATING CANNONBALL!" Usopp gasped.

"The Slow Slow Beam!" Foxy stated. "Fehfehfeh! The effect lasts about thirty seconds. After that time the object will regain its original speed as if nothing ever happened. Fehfehfehfeh!"

"Twenty-five… twenty-six…" Ricky quietly counted.

"Can't believe your eyes I take it!" Foxy continued to boast as the cannonball drifted in front of his face.

"Thirty…"

The cannonball regained its original speed and impacted with Foxy's long nose. KA-BOOOM!

"BOSS! OH NO!" Porche gasped.

"Pupupupu!" Hamburg laughed. "He was too caught up in showing off."

"So that's why we didn't win the race," Usopp realized.

"And that explains why they're so overly confident about these games," Sanji noted. "What a joke of a Devil Fruit Power."

"It doesn't matter!" Porche snapped. "You guys lost! You know all the rules and you agreed to all the terms!"

Foxy recovered from the explosion and popped back up, "That's right! The Donut Race is over! AND WE ARE THE WINNERS!"

"Heehee," Porche giggled. "Too bad for you guys."

"HEY YOU!" Itomimizu stomped over to the Straw Hats. "GIMME BACK MY BIRD!"

Ricky shrugged, "I hate birds anyway."

-x-

"AND THAT CONCLUDES ROUND ONE!" Itomimizu announced on stage. "NOW WE SHALL COMMENCE WITH THE AWARDING OF THE PIRATE. THE WINNING CAPTAIN WILL SELECT A MEMBER OF THE OPPOSING CREW!"

"Fehfehfehfehfeh!" Foxy laughed as he strutted to the front of the stage.

The Straw Hats scowled as they stared up at Foxy. Most of them. Zoro was still drinking.

"My first selection is none other than… YOU!" Foxy pointed at the eight Straw Hat Pirates. "THE DOCTOR TONY TONY CHOPPER! BRING HIM TO ME AT ONCE!"

Two Foxy Pirates came over and grabbed Chopper.

"NO! NO! I DON'T WANNA GO!" the tiny reindeer-human hybrid wailed as he was carried away from his crew to the stage.

"NO, CHOPPER!" Nami gasped. She turned and shoved Ricky. "DO SOMETHING!"

"I can't," Ricky said. "Those are the rules. We lost. He gets to pick one of our crew. The only thing we can do now is try to win him back in the next two rounds."

Chopper was brought up to Foxy who took great joy in hugging the adorable furry reindeer.

"Fehfehfeh!" Foxy laughed. "He's such a rare creature! And even softer than I imagined!"

"Oh boss!" Porche gushed as she ran on stage. "May I hold him? Please!" Foxy passed Chopper off to Porche who happily hugged the struggling reindeer to her chest.

"HE'S JUST SO DAMN CUTE!" Foxy exclaimed. "AND HE'S OURS NOW!"

"NO! NO! NO!" Chopper hollered as he struggled against Porche's tight hold.

"CHOPPER!" Luffy called out.

"So that creep had his eye set on Chopper, huh?" Sanji questioned. "Well, I suppose he is among the rarest of rare animals."

"He's one of a kind," Ricky admitted.

"Or maybe he collects cute things," Nami suggested.

"You know, I wouldn't rule out a fur fetish," Robin stated.

"WHY DOES IT EVEN MATTER?" Usopp yelled. "FOCUS PEOPLE! THAT FREAK OVER THERE JUST TOOK OUR FRIEND!"

"You guys…" Chopper whimpered as he was placed in a chair on stage.

Foxy walked over and smirked down at him, "Alright Doctor Chopper. Enough of all that. You're on my crew now. You need to pledge you loyalty to me. And you can start by putting on this mask." Foxy reached out and put a slanted-eyed foxy mask on Chopper's face.

"You… you guys…" Chopper sobbed.

"I'm so sorry that we lost Chopper!" Usopp cried into his arm. "We did or best. Farwell."

"FEHFEHFEHFEH!" Foxy laughed. "He is truly a rarity!"

"Our very own talking reindeer!" Porche gushed. "He's so amazing!"

"Haha! We're gonna get along great!" a Foxy Pirate laughed as he put a set of split Foxy ears on top of Chopper's hat. "Here."

"Welcome aboard," another Foxy Pirate said to Chopper.

"YOU GUYS!" Chopper shouted as he jumped up in his chair. Tears and snot ran down his furry face. "LISTEN! I ONLY WENT OUT TO SEA BECAUSE OF YOU! I WON'T! NO! I REFUSE! RICKY INVITED ME! I SET SAIL TO BE ONE OF LUFFY'S STRAW HATS! I WON'T GO WITH THEM! PLEASE! NO! I AM THE SHIP'S DOCTOR OF THE STRAW HAT PIRATES TONY TONY CHOPPER! I WON'T GOOO!"

THUNK! Zoro slammed down his bottle of grog.

"Quit your belly aching Chopper," the swordsman snapped. "It's disgraceful."

"Uh… Zoro…" Usopp mumbled.

"You made the choice to set sail as a pirate," Zoro stated. "Only you. And now you have to live with the consequences of that decision. We agreed to the terms of this game. You, Usopp and everyone else did the best that they could. Not one pirate worth is salt is gonna sympathize with those tears." Zoro stood up and stared at Chopper. "A man would suck it up and quietly watch the rest of this game."

"What's wrong with you!" Nami berated him. "Don't you know how he must be feeling!"

Sniff! Sniff! Chopper wiped away his tears and brushed the snot away from his blue nose. Then he sat back down in his chair.

"Boil me or cook me alive!" Chopper growled. "GIMME YOUR WORST YOU BASTARDS!"

"Chopper…" Nami gasped.

"Atta boy," Zoro praised the reindeer.

"That swordsman is totally awesome!" one of the Foxy Pirates exclaimed.

"Yeah, you teach him a lesson Zoro!" Usopp cheered.

"Hey boss!" another Foxy Pirate called out. "Let's take him next."

"That was so inspirational I can't stop crying!" another Foxy Pirate confessed.

Ricky grinned at Zoro then looked over at Chopper. "Don't worry Chopper. I'm in round two. I'm not gonna let these jerks keep my little brother for long. Let's start the second round."

"Right," Sanji agreed as he lit up a cigarette. "We've still got two more rounds left of this. There's no way we're letting those jerks take our emergency food supply."

"Hey wait, wasn't Chopper supposed to be in the second round?" Usopp asked. "How can he compete if they took him?"

"Good point," Robin remarked.

"Ha-ha!" a Foxy Pirate laughed. "That's one of the most trilling parts of the game. Remember the rules, you can't change your team's roster. No replacements allowed."

"Actually," Ricky spoke up, "The rule is that we can't make a substitute unless we announce it beforehand." Ricky turned to Zoro. "You're in."

"WHAT!" Itomimizu shouted from back up on Chirp Chirp. "YOU DIDN'T HAVE ANY SUBSTITUTES LISTED ON YOUR ROSTER!"

"Check it again," Ricky told him.

The Party Organizer pulled out the Straw Hats' Roster. He scanned it to the bottom and spotted an asterisk and the words 'Roronoa Zoro as substitute'.

"THERE'S NO WAY I MISSED THIS!" Itomimizu insisted.

"You're all the way up there on your bird and you've had that roster with you this whole time," Ricky pointed out. "How could I possibly have changed it?"

"Hey, wasn't Ricky riding on that loud-mouthed guy's bird for the first round?" Luffy asked.

"Sneaky bastard," Nami muttered. "At least we've got our own fox to counter theirs."

"Its right there, that makes it official," Ricky stated. "Zoro's joining me and Sanji for Round 2."

"FINE! YOU'RE STILL NOT GOING TO WIN!"

Ricky turned and grinned at Zoro and Sanji. "Game on, guys."

"So that was your fallback plan," Zoro realized. "Hey curlybrow, you can sit this one out too."

"Shut up mosshead!" Sanji snapped. "We don't even really need you."

"Do you think Ricky will be able to get those two to work together?" Usopp asked.

"If they want any chance to win they'll have to," Nami resolved.

"THE SECOND ROUND IS THE GROGGY RING! WHERE THE STRAW HAT TEAM OF RICKY, SANJI AND SUBSTITUE ZORO WILL BE FACING THE UNDEFEATED GROGGY MONSTERS!"

-x-

Next chapter is Round 2: the Groggy Ring.

'Till Next Time…

Peace!