PART II
Chapter X
Spock
Starfleet Academy, Earth Star date 2247
Spock looked up from his from the lecture notes that he was taking at the chart in the textbook to which the instructor was inferring, the Venn diagram was illustrating the E=MC2 theory of relativity for his quantum mechanics course, which he was already familiar with. Spock recalled his schedule for his first year at Starfleet; the courses included astronomy, astrophysics, astrography, probability mechanics, comparative xenobiology, semiotics, quantum mechanics, and warp engineering. Spock did not anticipate any difficulties related to the curriculum. He was more concerned with his social skills. Spock was quickly coming to realize that while most of Starfleet's instructors were highly knowledgeable in their selected fields of study as well as sensitive to different alien customs, his fellow cadets were not. Fellow cadets were constantly casually touching Spock. As a touch telepath, this was highly unnerving. While Spock had strong shields, being touched without proper warning was highly uncomfortable. Additionally, Spock felt socially awkward; few cadets understood his need for logic and avoided him. Spock had hoped that Starfleet would give him a chance to be accepted for who he was, instead he was now isolated for different reasons. After just six months as Starfleet, Spock felt lonely and homesick.
Jim had been sending him regular communications, which he greatly appreciated. Spock went into great detail about his courses but he tried to be as vague as possible regarding his social life or lack thereof. Jim said he missed him and couldn't wait to join him in Starfleet. This brought a true smile to Spock's face. With Jim intelligence and perseverance, Spock had no doubt that he would be accepted.
"Spock, where have you been hiding?" Dr. Leonard McCoy asked with a grin. He sat down next to Spock grazing against his arm accidently. Spock braced himself and reinforced his shields so the doctor's thoughts and emotions would not affect him.
"Hiding is illogical doctor." Spock replied. McCoy dropped the comparative xenobiology textbook on the table. Spock raised an eyebrow, as he glanced at it.
"I just though I would let you know that I was reading ahead to the chapter on Vulcan's and I have to say you all are a very interesting physiologically. I already knew about the green copper based blood and the location of the heart at your side, as well as the increased strength and touch telepathy. I have a question for you, is it true that a Vulcan male penis is doubled ridged and nearly twice the size of a humans?" McCoy asked with a wicked expression.
Spock turned bright green. "Doctor that question is highly personal and inappropriate. Vulcan's are extremely conservative when it comes to sex, in fact, most do not have sex until after they are properly bonded." The doctor's jaw dropped and he began chuckling.
"Wait a minute Spock. Does that mean you're a virgin? Oh boy that explains a lot. You need to get laid to release some of that tension before you explode." Spock flushed green again, thinking about the numerous offers for casual sex he had received during his six months here at Starfleet from both male and female cadets. It seemed most cadets were eager to jump into bed as often as possible with as many people as possible. Spock had politely declined the offers and most took the hint and then avoided him completely afterwards no longer interested in a platonic friendship.
"Dr. McCoy, I would appreciate it if you would cease with the personal line of questioning." Spock said as he got up to leave.
"Come on Spock, don't be like that. A good roll in the hay would help you pull that stick out of your ass," McCoy called as Spock left.
Spock returned to his quarters in order to meditate. After a few hours of deep meditation, Spock felt more centered and in control of his emotions. His communicator chirped. Spock looked down and saw the message was from Jim. Spock read the message.
Hey Spock, it's Jim, just dropping you a line to see how things at Starfleet are going. Everything is status quo at here at home. Sarek is off world on a diplomatic assignment and Amanda is doing well. I have been trying to keep busy. I have been feeling antsy lately. I've had to spend more time flying. I don't know. I just feel off. I would love to come visit you at Starfleet. Hope all is well. Jim.
Spock frowned as he read the communication. While he would indeed enjoy a visit from Jim, He worried about Jim "feeling off." He trusted Jim completely. He was a powerful psychic with exceptional control, but flying for Jim was like meditation for Spock, a stress reliever. Something was causing an increased stress response in Jim and Spock wondered what it could be. He replied to the communication and invited Jim to come for a visit.
Chapter XI
James
Starfleet Academy, Earth Star date 2247
Jim disembarked from the shuttle from Vulcan to San Francisco. He immediately took to the sky. He stayed at a high altitude to avoid detection until he was right above Starfleet. He then carefully landed. He pulled his wings tightly closed and pulled them flush against his back. Jim then put on a heavy trench coat, which was uncomfortable but hid his wings well. Starfleet had its share of aliens but Jim would most likely still cause heads to turn and attract unwanted attention. Jim headed towards the dorms where he knew he would find Spock.
Jim knocked on Spock's door. Spock opened it almost immediately. Jim took I minute to study his friend. Spock was still handsome with dark hair and eyes. He looked taller and slightly broader, his muscles clearly visible under his cadets uniform. His jaw line seemed a little stronger which just made him look more handsome. "You look good Spock. Can I get a hug?" Jim asked sincerely with a smile. He had missed Spock terribly.
Spock nodded. "Of course, Jim, but come inside first so you can take that coat off." Spock said as he helped Jim remove the coat. Jim immediately unfurled his wings stretching them out completely. Spock eyes widened at the sight his wings. "Jim, your wings." Spock said in an awed voice. He reached out to touch them without thinking, stroking the soft outer feathers along the bone. Jim moaned softly and arched his wings into the touch as pleasure shot through his whole body and heat pooled in his groin, causing his cock to stir. Spock pulled his hand away alarmed by his moan. "Sorry Jim, did I hurt you? I should have asked first." Spock was so worried that he hurt him that he failed to notice that Jim was half hard with arousal. Jim was so happy to see Spock he really couldn't care less. As Spock moved behind him to look more closely at his wings, Jim carefully adjusted himself. Thankfully, his erection had faded.
"No, its ok Spock. You didn't hurt me; my wings have just become really sensitive to touch. Now you owe me a hug." Said Jim, pulling Spock into a tight embrace. Jim began to coo softly without realizing it. Jim wrapped his wings around Spock's back creating a cocoon of brilliant white and red feathers. The color patterns on Jims wings had started to change in the last month, becoming more complex with several different shades of red. His wingspan had also increased by nearly a third. When Jim's wings were fully extended they measured nearly sixteen feet across. Jim could sense Spock's emotions of happiness and relief even with both of their shields up. That caused Jim to pause for a second. His telepathy must be strengthening. Spock allowed Jim to hold him for a few more moments before gently pulling away. Jim missed the contact as soon as it was gone.
"How are you Jim? Your last message had me worried." Spock asked looking Jim over critically. Jim knew he looked different. Aside from the obvious changes to his wings, he was also going through a growth spurt that started around the same time that the colors and patterns on his wings had started to change and he was still shooting up. He didn't have Spock's heavily defined muscles or bulk but he had gotten stronger. His muscles were defined but more long, lean and lithe. His hair was still blonde but had darkened a bit. His facial features remained the same, light blue eyes with full lips and sun kissed skin. He smiled but it didn't quite reach his eyes.
"Jim, sit down and talk to me. I know something's wrong. What is it?" Spock motioned to the sofa in the living room. Jim sat with a sigh. He knew he needed to come clean to his whole family but he wanted to tell Spock first. Something had been causing more changes in Jim. Jim had a strong suspicion that he was going into puberty but had been avoiding seeing a healer. He knew it was unwise, but as the old saying went sometimes ignorance was bliss.
"Spock, I think I'm starting to hit puberty," Jim explained. He twitched nervously. Spock sat down next to him.
"Are you sure? You're only fourteen. Have you seen a healer?" Spock inquired.
"No Spock, I'm not sure that's just my best guess, but remember humans hit puberty earlier that Vulcan's early to mid teens, rather than late teens to early twenties. I haven't been to a healer yet. I didn't want to worry the family." Spock frowned. Jim looked away guilty.
"Jim you need to see a healer as soon as possible if you suspect something is going on." Jim began to tremble with nerves. The only one who knew about his dormant female organs was Sarek. Jim knew he needed to tell Spock the whole truth but couldn't help the anxiety that he was feeling.
"Spock there is something that you need to know. I'm sorry that I didn't tell you sooner, but I was ashamed. You know that my DNA was altered in Tarsus. I never told you that I have two sets of sex organs, one male and one female. Spock's eyes widened in shock. "So far, the female set has been dormant. I hope it stays that way. My symptoms have been pretty consistent with male puberty." Jim flushed with his admission. "At first the symptoms were pretty nonspecific. I have been going through a huge growth spurt, and my wingspan was increased dramatically with my feathers changing their colors and patterns. At first, I just thought I just was growing and maturing. My psychic abilities have also increased but I wrote that off as well. But then other strange things started happening making me suspicious. I started feeling anxious, aggressive and possessive for no apparent reason even though I flew regularly. My wings also became extremely sensitive to touch nearly as sensitive as my genitals." Jim's face was bright red by now and Spock was starting to blush as well. My penis and testicles have gotten larger and I started getting erections. I also have been having some pretty erotic dreams." Jim admitted.
Spock just stared at him. "Spock say something," Jim begged his anxiety skyrocketed. Jim started to regret telling Spock everything.
"Jim you must see a healer," Spock insisted. "It is dangerous for you to ignore symptoms of puberty especially with two sets of sex organs. If they both become active, and start releasing competing hormones that could cause numerous problems." Jim released the breath that he had been holding. Spock wasn't disgusted and think he was a freak, but he was worried about him.
Chapter XII
Spock
Starfleet Academy, Earth Star date 2247
Spock struggled with his emotions. Fear was illogical. Spock however could not shake the insidious feeling that something life changing was on the horizon. "Jim promise me that you will see a healer as soon as you return to Vulcan," Spock implored.
Jim bit his lip and looked away from Spock quickly. "Spock, I don't want everyone to know. Everyone already looks down on me on Vulcan because I'm different. If this gets out, it will be a hundred times worse." Jim said softly looking terribly unhappy. "I know it's dangerous to ignore, but I just need some more time to get my head around it."
Spock didn't like it but he would not betray Jim's confidence. "Jim, it is your decision but I do not think it is wise to avoid a healer," Spock stated with a frown.
"I'll think about it Spock, but can we please change the subject? I really don't want to talk about this any longer." Jim asked with a sigh. "Why don't you show me around campus? I love to see some of the simulation labs and maybe meet some of your fellow cadets." Jim smiled visibly brightening.
"Very well," Spock conceded. "The labs are on the north end of the campus," Spock said as he helped Jim put his coat back on. Spock led the way out of the dorms and towards the labs.
Jim took the opportunity to look around the campus. It was large and well maintained. There was a constant flow of professors and cadets. "Spock, I know you said that you were acing all of your classes but how do you like the program at Starfleet?" Jim asked.
"The program is excellent. I am learning sufficiently. My fellow cadets, however, can be disconcerting at times. They do not have the personal boundaries that I am used to on Vulcan. They are very casual about touch." Spock informed Jim.
Jim nodded. "I can see how that would stress you out Spock. Just tell them that you're a touch telepath and to be careful not to touch you without asking," Jim suggested. Spock nodded but did not bother to tell Jim that he had already asked his fellow cadets to do as Jim asked, but most did not listen. "Wow, this is amazing Spock!" Jim exclaimed as the entered the stimulation lab. The lab was filled with various high tech simulators including everything from flight to communications. Spock agreed the equipment was superb. "I really want to be accepted here Spock, too bad we aren't the same age or we could have been in the class and taken all of our courses together." Jim said wistfully.
"I concur that that would have been both beneficially and desirable Jim." Spock agreed with a smile. "Are you hungry? The cafeteria is next door." Spock said pointing out the window to large building.
"You bet Spock. My metabolism is through the roof so it's rare for me not to be hungry." Jim said as they began walking towards the building.
"There is a wide variety of food here. I am sure that you will find something you like." Spock said as he chose a simple salad for himself. Jim took his time looking through all the food on the menu and ordered pizza with a variety of toppings. They both took their seats at a small empty table.
"God, haven't had pizza in forever." Jim said with a grin. "So, Spock, I'd like to meet some of your friends if that's ok with you." Spock frowned. Before Spock could reply, he heard Dr. Leonard McCoy shout from across the cafeteria and when Spock looked that way he saw the doctor heading right towards him. Spock cringed and was tempted to push Jim out of the room just to avoid another encounter with the crass physician.
"Spock! Who's your friend? I just wanted to apologize for earlier, I didn't mean to offend you." Spock huffed and pulled away as McCoy deliberately touched his shoulder.
"I highly doubt that doctor." Spock murmured coldly. Jim frowned as he observed the encounter between the two of them. "Dr. McCoy, this is James Kirk." McCoy raised an eyebrow.
"An relation to George Kirk?" McCoy asked. Jim nodded still frowning slightly.
"He was my father," Jim answered stiffly. "How do you know Spock?" Jim started to fidget. Spock was sure he was uncomfortable in that coat with his wings confined.
"Spock and I are in the same xenobiology class. How do you two know each other?" McCoy inquired with a frown of his own. Spock wanted nothing more than to end the conversion so that he and Jim could leave before McCoy could ask any more personal questions that were best left unanswered.
"Jim came to live with my family after his parents died. If you will excuse us Dr. McCoy, we have to be going." Spock didn't wait for a response before heading towards the exit. Jim followed suit taking his slice of pizza with him.
"Good God Spock! What an overbearing ass. What the hell is his problem?" Jim asked as he swallowed the last of his pizza.
"Believe it or not that was fairly tame conversion for the doctor which is why I was in such a hurry to leave before he could ask anymore prying questions." Spock explained as they made their way back to the dorms. "I really do not believe Dr. McCoy has malicious intent. He just has no tact or restraint, which can be frustrating." Spock opened the door to his room so he and Jim could enter.
"So Spock you up for a game of chess? I want to try to break that winning streak that you have going." Jim said with a grin. Spock nodded and went in search of his chessboard.
Chapter XIII
James
Starfleet Academy, Earth Star date 2247
Jim's wings fluttered slightly in his excitement as he looked at the chessboard. "I think it is a stalemate Spock," Jim said gleefully. This is the closest I've ever come to beating you."
"Your skill has improved remarkably Jim," Spock conceded. Jim smiled as he looked up at Spock. Jim would really miss him. Sarek and Amanda were great but it was nice to be able to talk to someone closer to his own age. Jim wished he could stay here at Starfleet with Spock but typically cadets were not permitted to enroll before the age of seventeen. Perhaps Sarek could call in a few favors and Jim might be able to apply a year early.
"So Spock, have you met any other cadets in class that are not overbearing assholes?" Jim questioned with a wink. Jim really wanted to meet some of Spock's friends.
"Quite honestly Jim the majority of cadets that I have met have been either cold and aloof or overly friendly." Jim gave him a confused look.
"Overly friendly?" Jim asked raising an eyebrow.
"They have made overt unwanted sexual advances towards me," Spock clarified.
Jim stared at him with his mouth agape. "Wait a second Spock, people are hitting on you?" Jim bristled slightly at the thought not because he could not believe it. Spock was very handsome and intelligent but at the thought of how uncomfortable it must be for Spock. Sarek had given Jim a crash course in Vulcan history and had explained that Vulcan's did not engage in sex before becoming bonded. Their families around the age of seven typically prearranged Vulcan bonds. Jim had asked Sarek if Spock had an intended mate but Sarek had not answered his question directly. Jim was tempted to ask Spock himself but did not want to bring it up in case it was a sore subject.
Jim sighed. "Well Spock, it could be worse at least people think you're hot," Jim said with a smirk. Spock raised one eyebrow. Jim smiled. "How long is the full curriculum?" Jim asked changing the subject.
"The length depends on the track of study. Officer training typically takes four years, however accelerated programs are available. I am currently enrolled in the accelerated Vulcan program and should complete my training in two and a half to three years total." Spock answered as he began to put away the chessboard and its pieces. Jim frowned he had hoped that he could enroll before Spock graduated but that wasn't likely.
"Well Spock it's great that you're ahead of the curve, but looks like I'll miss you by a year. It's too bad really would have been fun. I guess I'll have just keep visiting. Will you promise to visit me after you graduate?"
"Of course Jim, as long as I am not indisposed with a space mission." Spock answered. Jim heart sank slightly. He'd forgotten that Spock would mostly be assigned his first mission shortly after graduation.
"Lets make the best of the rest of this visit. Have you been sight seeing around California yet Spock?" Jim asked as grabbed his coat.
Chapter XIV
Spock
Starfleet Academy, Earth Star date 2250
Spock looked around the auditorium at his surroundings. He and his fellow graduates were clad in the traditional terran caps and gowns. In addition, Spock wore the multicolored tasseled ropes around his neck indicating his multiple honors. Spock could hardly believe that this day had come. As he looked around the room, he found his family in the audience. They all looked proud. Jim had been accepted to Starfleet and would be starting almost immediately after Spock graduated for early admission in summer. Spock would not receive his first official space mission assignment until December, so he would actually have some free time. Because of his outstanding performance at the academy, he had been offered a teaching internship over the summer and a faculty position at Starfleet after the internship. He was seriously considering at least completing the internship while awaiting his first assignment. He would be able to gain some teaching experience as well as spend some time with Jim while he was enrolled at the academy. Spock returned his attention to the keynote speaker as he began his address to the graduates.
Spock went in search of his family as he made his way through the crowd of new graduates. The ceremony had been brief, considering the size of the graduating class. He quickly spotted Jim with his brilliantly colored wings. Even when Jim kept his wings tightly closed against his back, the colors and patterns were clearly visible. Jim had decided not to cover his wings for the ceremony because for one it was terribly uncomfortable for him keep his wings covered for extended periods of time and second it would be nearly impossible for him to keep his wings secret for his entire education at Starfleet so he might as well just "let it all hang out" as Jim would say.
"Spock over here," Jim called to him when he spotted Spock. Both his mother and father waved and smiled as Spock made his way over to them.
"Spock, I'm so proud of you darling," his mother exclaimed as she pulled him into a tight embrace. She pulled out her camera. "Picture time!" Spock posed with his family as the pictures were taken. "Darling we are all going out to celebrate," his mother stated with a smile.
They were seated in a restaurant that specialized in vegetarian dishes. The food was excellent. "Spock have you received a post graduate mission assignment?" Sarek inquired.
"I have not yet received orders regarding my first mission but I was informed that those will not be expected for about six months. I was, however offered at teaching internship at Starfleet in the mean time, which I would be able to complete that would make me eligible for a faculty position upon its completion." Spock explained. He could see the surprised looks on his parent's faces as they took in his statement.
"Spock, that's awesome!" Jim blurted out and flushed as he took in Sarek and Amanda's shocked faces. "Isn't it?" Once Amanda recovered, she nodded.
"Of course it is." Amanda said and looked at he husband to gage his reaction.
Sarek finally broke his silence. "They must think highly of your performance to offer you an internship." Spock felt an illogical wave of relief. He'd been reluctant to inform his father of the internship because he feared that Sarek would not approve.
"I desire to complete the internship, I doubt that I will accept the teaching position rather than my first space mission but the teaching experience will be beneficial in the interim." Spock stated and could see the relief on his fathers face.
"Logical," Sarek said. Jim was grinning from ear to ear practically bouncing with excitement. Spock smiled at he looked at Jim his excitement was contagious.
"Spock, this is great! I'll be able to see you while you complete your internship. I promise not to be too bad of an influence." Jim said playfully with a wink.
Chapter XV
James
Starfleet Academy, Earth Star date 2250
Jim looked around his dormitory; he was surprised to learn that he would have a roommate. Evidently early admission cadets were paired up for summer classes in the dorms. Jim began unpacking his belongings; he chose one of the beds on opposite sides of the room. Jim sighed, the space was definitely going to be cramped but there wasn't much that he could do about that. At least it was only for the summer. He looked down at his room assignment evidently he was to be paired with Hikaru Sulu who was on the navigation track. Jim hoped that they would get along, the last thing he wanted or needed was a feud with his roommate. At least Spock would be here with him. Jim was psyched. He was so pleasantly surprised that Spock would be accepting the teaching internship. His communicator chirped. Jim looked down at the message.
Jim, I hope that the find your living quarter's adequate. I will be free after 1730 and will meet you at your dormitory if that is acceptable. Regards, Spock.
Jim smirked and answered quickly that the meeting would be acceptable. Spock was still very formal even with the time he had spent on Starfleet away from his home on Vulcan. Jim was pulled from his musings by a knock on the door. "Come in," Jim called out. The door opened and a young man who must he his roommate entered. He was of Asian descendant as his name had implied. His eye's widened briefly as he took in Jim's appearance most notably his wings. "Hi, I'm James Kirk, but everyone calls me Jim. I'm pleased to meet you. You must be Hikaru Sulu, my new roommate." Jim held out his hand, which Hikaru accepted to shake.
"Pleased to meet you to," Hikaru said with a slightly overwhelmed smile. Jim lowered his shields very slightly, not enough to read thoughts just enough to get a very basic impression. He was relieved to sense that while surprised and curious, Hikaru held no immediate animosity towards him. He then put his shields back up completely. "Sorry to stare but the basic information that they gave me indicated that you were human, must have been a typo," Hikaru explained.
Jim smirked. "Technically, I am, but that's a really long story for another time." Jim said in a tone that left no room for argument. Hikaru looked like he wanted to more information but let it drop. "I picked a bed already and was just starting to unpack. I hope that's ok with you." Hikaru nodded.
"That's fine. I guess I'll do the same. So you're on the officer's command track?" Hikaru asked as he began unpacking. Jim nodded. For now, he thought to himself. One thing that Jim had learned to accept was that things in life rarely went as planned. "I'm going to be concentrating on navigation as you probably know but I saw that Starfleet offers some really extensive botany courses. I might take a few as electives. That subject holds a lot of personal interest for me. If you need to know anything about plants, I'm your man."
"I'll keep that in mind, although I don't usually have a lot of plant related questions." Jim said with chuckle. "God this room is small! We are going to be packed in like sardines." Jim complained with a sigh.
"No worries, Jim. I'm Japanese. If there's one thing that you learn, it's how to utilize limited space." Hikaru said with a chuckle of his own. It was then Jim decided that he and Hikaru Sulu would get along just fine.
Chapter XVI
Spock
Starfleet Academy, Earth Star date 2250
Spock headed toward the student dormitories in search of Jim. His own housing was now located in the faculty living quarters. The rooms as expected were much more spacious and more lavish than the student dorms. Spock's first day of internship had been informative. He was assisting a number of professors whose classes included communications, engineering, as well as navigation.
Spock was taken aback when young man who most definitely was not Jim answered the door. At first, Spock thought he must be at the wrong door, but then he heard Jim ask "Spock is that you?" Jim came to the door as the other young man stepped aside. "Spock this is my roommate, Hikaru Sulu." Jim explained with a gesture towards the young man. "Hikaru, this is Spock, a very close friend of mine." Hikaru frowned as he looked at Spock.
"Are you the TA for my introduction to Astro-navigations class?" Hikaru asked, as he looked Spock over closely. Spock nodded.
Jim started laughing in response to the question. "What are the odds Spock? Wait,forget I asked. You probably really could calculate them." Jim took Spock's arm as he led him into the cramped room.
"Nice to meet you Mr. Sulu. I look forward to seeing you in class. Jim, this room is rather small. Perhaps we should continue our visit in my quarters?" Spock suggested. Jim nodded.
"Spock and I going to catch up. I'll see you later Hikaru." Jim said as he and Spock made their way out the door.
Spock opened the door to his quarters and Jim stepped in. "Wow,Spock, this is so much nicer than my room." Jim said as he looked around.
"How was your first day of class Jim?" Spock asked with genuine interest. Jim smiled and it lit up his entire face. At nearly eighteen, Jim had definitely matured and was extremely handsome. His dirty blonde hair shone with natural sun-streaked highlights no doubt from all of the flying he did. His face had matured but was not overly masculine. He had the same bright blue eyes, high cheekbones and full lips. His physique was still lean and lithe, with small but defined muscles no doubt to help accommodate flight. His wings,as always, were a magnificent sight to behold with intricate patterns and a variety of white and red and pink tones. Spock knew that Jim was extremely personable and charming. Spock still felt awkward in his own skin and often envied Jim for his ability to be so comfortable with himself despite all that he had been through.
"It was great Spock. I'm sure I'll do great here. It was a bit of a surprise finding out I would have a roommate, but Sulu seems really cool and easy going. Spock there is one thing that I am a little worried about. I have to have a full physical tomorrow at Starfleet Medical Academy." Jim began to fidget which was a tell tale sign that he was nervous.
"Do not worry Jim. Annual physicals are required for all students and faculty at Starfleet. The examination is routine." Spock said attempting to calm Jim's nerves.
"I figured that Spock but I haven't been to a healer since I first came to Vulcan." Jim said looking somewhat guilty. Spock frowned. Jim flushed and looked away.
"Jim do you mean to tell me you have not been examined since my father initially brought you to live with us almost four years ago? That is reckless and dangerous! I know that it makes you uncomfortable but some things are just necessary. You of all people should understand this with your history and unique physiology." Spock stared at Jim in complete disbelief. During their communications, Jim had never directly lied but had implied that his health was fine and Spock had assumed that he saw a healer shortly after his visit with Spock during his first year at Starfleet.
"I know Spock and I'm sorry but I was scared. I will go tomorrow. I don't have a choice." Jim began to tremble violently and hyperventilate as Spock was assaulted by feelings of guilt and terror. Jim must have dropped his shields in his distress and was now strongly projecting. Spock strengthened his shields but could still feel Jim's distress. Spock was hesitant to touch him but knew that a meld would be the quickest and easiest way to calm him. While Spock had helped to teach Jim to build his shields, he had never melded with him. Sarek was the only one who had done it.
"My mind to your mind, my thoughts to your thoughts," Spock said as placed his fingers on Jim's psi points. Spock was quickly pulled into Jim's mind. He sent feelings of love and reassurance but he was still having difficulty calming Jim. Spock now realized just how strong Jim's psychic gifts had become. Spock who himself was a very strong telepath amongst Vulcan's despite his mixed heritage, should have been able to calm Jim quite easily. Spock sought out Jim's mental presence but only found fear as old memories of his abuse during Tarsus overwhelmed Jim's mind. Spock was horrified at what he saw. Spock knew that Jim had been through a lot but he never had realized how terrible his life had been and what abuses he had seen and been exposed to. Spock was forced to delve deeper into Jim's mind, which was dangerous for both Jim and himself. Spock finally felt Jim's presence hidden deep in the recesses of his mind attempting to hide from the memories. "Jim, come with me." Spock called gently. Once Jim felt Spock's presence he clung too it like a drowning man to a life raft. Spock attempted to carefully complete the meld and release both Jim and himself but Jim was able to make his way into Spock's mind circumventing his shields.
Chapter XVII
James
Starfleet Academy, Earth Star date 2250
Jim felt Spock's presence in his mind amongst the chaos. He clung to Spock even as Spock's presence attempted to leave. Jim was pulled through a barrier as he entered a quiet serene place, which instinctively felt like home. Jim calmed immediately now that he had escaped the terrifying memories and chaotic thoughts that had been plaguing him. He felt completely at peace here more so than he ever felt in his own mind. He didn't ever want to leave. Slowly, as his thoughts calmed, Jim realized where he was. This was Spock mind! Spock must have initiated a mind meld. He could see bits and pieces of Spock's memories and thoughts. He then realized that Spock's mental presence was attempting to carefully gently guide him out. He had been so overwhelmed with fear that he had been unconsciously resisting letting go of Spock's presence. Now that he was calm he released his hold, which allowed Spock to end the meld.
When Jim opened his eyes. He saw that Spock was breathing heavily and covered in sweat. "Oh God! Spock are you Ok?" Jim asked. Spock didn't respond causing Jim's anxiety to skyrocket. "Spock, say something!" Jim cried. Spock didn't answer but at least his breathing had calmed. Then Spock's eyes closed and his body went limp. Jim strengthened his shields and carefully positioned Spock lying down on the coach. "It has got to be a healing trance," Jim murmured to himself as looked at Spock's still form. Jim didn't want to risk further damage attempting to read Spock's mind especially if he was not conscious and shielding.
Jim didn't know what to do. He knew that if Spock had indeed put himself into a healing trance then he would most likely recover quickly without further intervention, but Jim could not be sure if that was the case. This was his fault. If he hadn't flipped out on Spock he wouldn't have attempted to meld and would have never been harmed enough to fall into a trance. Jim tried to remember what had happened during the meld that could have injured Spock but couldn't think of anything. All he remembered was feeling terrified in his own mind and then being calm and at peace in Spock's. Jim wondered how that was even possible. Sarek had melded with him before but it had never been that personal. He had been in Jim's mind and projected calming feelings to Jim but Jim had never entered Sarek's mind and seen his thoughts.
Jim reluctantly picked up his communicator and called Starfleet Medical Academy. After being put on hold and transferred to three different departments, Jim was finally connected with a physician. He went over what happened with the doctor who told him that they would send a physician who was qualified to examine a Vulcan over right away and that as long as Spock was breathing and not cyanotic it would be easier not to move him until after he was properly examined. Jim waited anxiously for the doctor and watched Spock like a hawk. His breathing was even and unlabored and his color was good. There was a knock at the door and Jim jumped up to answer it.
Chapter XVIII
McCoy
Starfleet Academy, Earth Star date 2250
Dr. Leonard McCoy nearly had a heart attack when Jim opened the door to Spock's room. "What the fuck!" McCoy blurted out before he could think better of it. He stared at Jim's wings in utter shock. "What are you?" McCoy asked totally at a loss for explanation. He had studied practically every known alien species in the galaxy but he had never studied anything that resembled Jim.
"Great it figures that they would send you. Are you really qualified to treat Vulcans?" Jim asked as McCoy followed him to where Spock was lying on the coach. McCoy frowned. Did he know this alien? He certainly seemed to know him. McCoy racked his brain but came up empty.
"Have we met?" McCoy asked. Jim frowned then rolled his eyes.
"Yes, but you obviously don't remember. That's really not important right now. Will you please take a look at Spock? I'm really worried that he's hurt." Jim pleaded his eyes clouded with worry.
McCoy nodded and took out his tricorder. He quickly ran it over Spock. "It appears that he has put himself into a healing trance, which should self-resolve very soon. I can't speculate on the injury that may have caused it, but you can ask him when he wakes up." McCoy said as he put away his tricorder. "What exactly happened here? I was told that he fell into a trance after a mind meld. That is very unusual for Vulcan's they are strong telepaths and have airtight mental shields that they develop and learn to control in early childhood."
Jim sighed. He really didn't want to go into specifics with McCoy of all people. Just as Jim was about to tell the whole story, Spock began to stir. "Dr. McCoy what are you doing here?" Spock asked looking confused.
"You gave your friend and I quite the scare Spock, damn hobgoblin!" McCoy admonished as Spock looked around still obviously confused.
"What did you call him?" Jim shouted obviously offended.
"Cool your jets kid. I didn't mean it maliciously. Spock and I went through Starfleet together we both recently graduated and are awaiting our first space mission assignments. Spock's interning for teaching and I'm working at Starfleet medical for some experience with treating aliens and making some extra cash as an added bonus. I'm telling you when my wife divorced me. She was a real vulture. All she left me was bones." McCoy complained.
"I can see why she left you." Jim mumbled under his breath. Hmm, McCoy hummed. "Nothing," Jim said with a sigh as he turned his attention back to Spock. "Spock, are you ok?"
Spock blinked and nodded. "I am much improved. I do not require medical attention Dr. McCoy. I am sorry for any inconvenience that I may have caused you." Spock sat up looking much more alert.
"Are you sure Spock? We could head down to Starfleet Medical and I could give you a more comprehensive scan." McCoy asked with a frown.
"I am quite sure, thank you. If it would make you feel better doctor I can stop by tomorrow after my classes to follow up." Spock bargained.
"Ok Spock, you've got a deal. Nice meeting you." McCoy said a glancing briefly at Jim who didn't offer his name as McCoy made his way out the door.
Chapter XIX
Spock
Starfleet Academy, Earth Star date 2250
Spock breathed a sigh of relief as McCoy left the room. Spock was more embarrassed than anything else. When he had melded with Jim he had been disturbed by not only the terrible memories in Jim's mind, but also the fact that Jim had been able to circumvent his shields and enter his mind so easily. Spock had been afraid that neither he nor Jim would find their way out of the meld. Between those two factors Spock had a very un-Vulcan like panic attack after the mind meld that caused him to fall into a healing trance. In all honesty, Jim's presence in his mind once Jim had calmed had been extremely soothing. Spock had a feeling that if he were to meld with Jim again when Jim was calm and not completely terrified that their minds would be highly compatible.
"Spock, are you really Ok?" Jim asked softly looking haunted as tears filled his eyes. "I didn't mean to hurt you." Spock heart broke as he heard the anguish in Jim's voice. He was tempted to touch Jim in gesture of comfort but was not sure his shields were strong enough for that yet.
"Jim, you didn't hurt me. The meld did not go as I expected it to and that caused me great anxiety, which led to the healing trance. It was not as serious as it first appeared." Spock admitted shamefully. "I meant to reassure you and all I caused was more stress for both of us."
"Spock, don't blame yourself! I flipped out on you. You did what most Vulcan healers would do and melded. I shouldn't have circumvented your shields. I honestly don't even know how I did it. I'm sorry." Jim said still looking miserable.
"Jim your psychic abilities are very strong. In fact, they are most likely now stronger than my own. That is how you were able to get around my shields." Spock said solemnly. "Will you be Ok at your physical tomorrow? Do you want me to come with you?" Jim turned beet red.
"I'll be ok Spock." Jim assured. "Spock, if you're ok, I think that I really should fly as soon as possible." Spock nodded his assent. "I'm going to go fly, I'll bring my communicator with me." Jim made his way out of the room.
Spock groaned. What a disaster! If Spock had known what a powerful psychic Jim had become, he would never have attempted a meld. He would certainly never attempt to do that again. Spock sat up and closed his eyes slipping into meditation.
Chapter XX
James
Starfleet Academy, Earth Star date 2250
Jim flew with all his might high above the sequoia trees. He had flown deep into California's Sequoia and Kings canyon. Jim felt his anxiety lessen. He glided lower and landed high in the branches of a Sequoia. Jim still felt guilty over what happened with Spock. Jim knew that he still had issues with medical examinations. Even though Jim knew that the exams were routine and non-invasive, the mere thought of medical exams and equipment brought back the nightmares of Tarsus. Jim had adjusted remarkably well to all the changes and adversity that life had thrown at him, but this was the one issue that he just couldn't seem to get past.
Jim knew that he would no longer be able to avoid all types of exams. He needed to have the physical tomorrow. He just hoped that he wouldn't have another anxiety attack. Jim was just thankful that Spock was all right. He wouldn't have ever been able to forgive himself if he had hurt Spock. While Jim was naturally friendly and outgoing, he had made very few friends on Vulcan because of his obvious differences. Jim hoped that Starfleet would prove to be different. For all of his smiles, Jim was often still lonely. That was why he was so excited that Spock would be staying at Starfleet for the internship even if it would only be for six months. Spock was his closest friend. Jim felt a wave of warmth engulf his body and a tightening deep inside him as he remembered how at peace he had felt in Spock's mind. Jim flushed when he looked down to see a bulge in his pants. He squirmed and adjusted himself. Jim was still a virgin although he had developed a strong libido becoming aroused rather easily.
Jim looked down as his communicator chirped. He was surprised to see that the message was from Sulu rather than Spock.
Jim,
I wanted to let you know that Spock stopped by hoping to catch you; he wanted to tell you that he is fine and not to worry.
Hikaru Sulu
Jim frowned when he realized how long he had been gone. He tended to loose track of time when he was flying. He took to the sky headed back to Starfleet.
By the time Jim reached Starfleet, he was exhausted. He had flown at top sped the entire time. He headed back towards his dorm room to take a very quick shower. He opened the door and was greeted by Hikaru's smiling face. "Wow Jim, you look beat. I've got some leftover's from dinner if you're interested." Hikaru asked happily.
Jim returned the smile. "Thanks, I never turn down food. I can be like a garbage disposal." Jim confessed with a wink as he made his way to the tiny refrigerator and dug into the leftovers food with gusto.
Hikaru shook his head in disbelief. "No way! I find that hard to believe. You're really thin I don't know where you would put it all." Jim just smiled. He liked Sulu well enough but wasn't about to open a line of questioning that was potentially endless.
"How are your classes going so far?" Jim asked hoping to keep the conversation neutral as he finished the leftovers.
"Ok, I guess. It is kind of hard to estimate the difficulty of a course solely based on its syllabus." Hikaru explained. Jim cleared the table and began washing the dirty dishes.
"Well I'm sure you'll do well. I pretty good with most areas of academics, so if you need help, just give me a holler. I'm covered in sweat and I stink. I'm going to grab a quick shower and then hit the sack. Thanks again for the food." Jim said as he made his was into the small bathroom.
Chapter XXI
Hikaru
Starfleet Academy, Earth Star date 2250
Hikaru was left staring as Jim closed the bathroom door and turned on the water. Hikaru couldn't make heads or tails of his roommate. He seemed friendly and interested about Hikaru, but offered little to no personal information about himself. Evasive that was the word that came immediately to mind. Hikaru never considered himself overly nosey, but his curiosity was most definitely peaked. Hikaru assumed Jim must have his reasons for being so guarded, but it was still difficult not to speculate about his history.
Jim also seemed to know assistant professor Spock personally, another strange coincidence. Hikaru knew that Vulcans were by nature very private people, borderline clannish. How would a so-called human meet and befriend a Vulcan. It could not have been at Starfleet as Spock had already graduated and Jim had just been admitted. Hikaru smirked as he thought of another classmate he had recently met while in his introduction to linguistics class.
Nyota Uhura was on the communications track and was simply beautiful. She was already fluent in several languages. Hoping to impress her, Hikaru had greeted her in Japanese. When she told him that she hadn't learned that language yet, he offered to tutor her if needed. At first she seemed a bit put off by the offer, but then told him that she would keep it in mind. Hikaru hoped that she would take him up on it and he could get to know her better and perhaps start dating.
Jim was on the command track and surprisingly he and Hikaru only had one class together basic warp design, which was a required course for every track. While they both were taking several of the same required courses, their schedules were different. Hikaru hoped that Jim would eventually loosen up a bit and stop being quite so secretive but only time would tell on that account.
The door to the bathroom opened and Jim came out already dressed. "I'm going to see if I can track down Spock. I'll see you later Sulu." Jim called as he had his way out the door.
Chapter XXII
James
Starfleet Academy, Earth Star date 2250
Jim took a deep breath as the receptionist called his name leading him into an exam room. "The doctor will be with you shortly. Please take off your clothes and put on a gown." The receptionist said cheerfully as she placed the forms that Jim had filled out into his new chart for the doctor closing the door behind her. Jim divested quickly and put on the paper gown. He then jumped up on the table with the paper covering feeling it crinkle as he shifted uncomfortably. God! This was the last place he wanted to be. Jim had spoken with Spock last night and told Spock again that he would be fine and not to come with him. Jim closed his eyes and tried to relax. He had never really been very apt at meditation. Both Spock and Sarek had attempted to teach him and encouraged him to practice but flying had always been much more effective at relieving stress for Jim. Never the less, Jim took slow deep breaths and attempted to clear his mind completely. Just as his mind started to go blank there was a knock at the door and Jim's eyes snapped open. "Come in," Jim said gravely.
Jim's eyes widened when he saw that the doctor was none other than Dr. Leonard McCoy. Jim barely stifled a groan. Of all the rotten luck, Jim was seriously tempted to ask for another physician but bit his tongue. "James T. Kirk, that name sounds familiar have we met?" McCoy asked. He was so busy looking at the chart that he hadn't bothered to look up at Jim.
"Yes." Jim answered just as McCoy finally looked at him. McCoy stared in disbelief evidently stuck speechless with his mouth hanging opened in shock. The look on his face was almost worth the trip and Jim's shoulders started to shake with stifled laughter. McCoy closed his mouth with a frown.
"What's so funny?" McCoy asked.
"The look on your face was priceless." Jim said feeling slightly more at ease. McCoy's frown deepened and he picked up a tricorder. Jim felt his anxiety spike when he saw it. "I think I ought to let you know that I get really anxious around doctors and medical equipment." Jim said seriously as he braced himself for the exam and strengthened his mental shields. Something in McCoy's face seemed to change and he looked at Jim almost sympathetically.
"I was reading your chart and I'm a bit confused. It says your human but your DNA is altered and you have abnormal chromosomes. How did that happen?" McCoy questioned and to Jim's surprise McCoy spoke softly and slowly approached Jim. "Anything you say here is confidential protected under doctor patient privilege." Jim bit his lip. He felt his eyes tearing up.
"I don't want to talk about it. Can you just please get this over with as quickly as possible?" Jim begged his voice shaking slightly. McCoy looked like he was going to argue but then seemed to change his mind. He nodded at Jim and turned on the tricorder.
"I'm going to scan you first, then do the physical exam." McCoy explained as he ran the tricorder over the length of Jim's entire body. He frowned as he looked at the readings. "This can't be right. It must be broken." He turned and pulled out a second one from a nearby drawer. "Let's try this again." McCoy repeated the scan and his frowned deepened. "What the hell? They both can't be broken."
"What is it saying?" Jim asked as his heart rated jumped. McCoy huffed and ran his fingers though his hair.
"Well your vital signs are slightly off; increased heart rate, blood pressure and respirations, most likely due to your obvious anxiety, but that's not what concerns me. It is giving me a host of abnormal physiologically readings. Your bones are less dense than normal almost completely hollow, you have increased muscle mass and lung capacity. Of course, there are also your wings but what is disturbing me are your hormone and reproductive readings. It saying that you have two sets of sex organs." McCoy answered looking confused. Jim breathed a sigh of relief. Those were all thing that he already knew. There were not any unpleasant surprises yet.
"Yeah. I was told that I have a uterus and set of ovaries, which were dormant." Jim explained. McCoy said nothing, just looked taken aback.
"You could have mentioned that in your history form. I am going to start the physical exam now. I go head to toe." McCoy warned. McCoy did a complete and very though physical. Jim had almost died of embarrassment when he got to the reproductive assessment. McCoy checked his penis and testes that in itself was humiliating enough. He then attempted to palpate the thin slit directly behind Jim's testicles across his perineum, which was no longer completely sealed. Jim jumped like he was electrified and nearly kicked McCoy in the face accidently. "Shit! Did I hurt you? I didn't palpate hard or use any pressure." Jim turned bright red and shook his head. "Sensitive, I'll bet. I really should give you a complete pelvic exam with a pap smear, but that is pretty invasive. Have you had one before?"
Jim shook his head. "It only recently opened and before you ask no I have not had a period. What's a pelvic exam and pap?" Jim asked with dread.
McCoy sighed. "I would use an instrument to open the vaginal walls and visualize and palpate your cervix with one hand and apply pressure on your abdomen with the other to check your ovaries. I also insert a swab to get a sample for analysis. I really hesitate to do it on someone who hasn't had vaginal intercourse before, the speculum is quite large and it might prove painful." Jim began to shake at the mere thought. He shook his head.
"Please don't!" He begged. "I don't think I could handle it." McCoy nodded his assent.
"Ok. I was able to get basic information from the tricorder. That should be sufficient. Jim I should warn you while your testosterone levels are higher than you estrogen right now and you appear to have gone through male puberty, your uterus and ovaries are not dormant. While they are not producing enough hormones to induce menstruation, they are certainly capable of doing so if your hormone levels were to shift for some reason. Try not to worry about it, but keep it in mind." Jim nodded numbly. He was just desperate to leave at this point. "Jim, listen if you ever change your mind and need to talk, I'm here. I may not be a psychiatrist but I can listen." Jim nodded again not trusting his voice. McCoy sighed. "Well that's it for the physical. Do you have any questions?" Jim shook his head.
"Thank you Dr. McCoy," Jim said softly. McCoy nodded solemnly.
"You're welcome, Jim." McCoy said as Jim left the exam room. Jim made his way back towards the dorms thinking perhaps McCoy wasn't the asshole that Jim had first thought.
Chapter XXIII
Spock
Starfleet Academy, Earth Star date 2250
Spock looked around the classroom. All the cadet's heads were down as they studied the exams. Spock was proctoring the first of the three exams for the Astro-navigations class. It had been just over a month since he began his internship teaching. While Spock had found the experience enjoyable, he was pretty sure that teaching would not be his primary profession and therefore would not accept the faculty position. He enjoyed teaching but there was a distinct lack of excitement. Space travel was what he yearned for. Spock was very glad for the opportunity for the internship, however, as he had been able to spend a good deal of time with Jim when he was not in class.
Spock smiled as he thought of Jim. As expected, Jim was excelling in all of his classes and had adjusted very well to life at Starfleet. Though he still regularly complained about the small dormitory that he was forced to share with Cadet Sulu. Jim liked his roommate but complained that the tiny room was making him claustrophobic. If it were not against regulations, Spock would have offered that Jim share his much larger room. Spock had run into Dr. McCoy a couple of weeks ago. He had inquired about both Spock and Jim's health. This caused Spock a bit of suspicion. When Spock had questioned Jim about the physical that he had completed, Jim insisted that it went fine and that there was nothing found that he didn't already know. Spock hoped that it was true but still worried about it. Jim had become quite upset when he brought it up.
Spock checked the time. "Ten minutes remain." He called to the cadets who all looked at the clock. Spock would be meeting Jim in the cafeteria for lunch after the exam.
As the last cadet turned in their exam, Spock gathered them up and put them in his briefcase to grade later. He made his way towards the professor's office to drop off the exams. As he made his way down the hall, he was greeted by Cadet Nyota Uhura. "Assistant professor Spock, how are you?" Cadet Uhura asked with a smile. Cadet Uhura was in his Xenolinguistics class and was a dedicated pupil.
"I am well cadet. And you?" Spock inquired politely. She beamed at him leaning in closer nearly touching him. Spock took a small step back. Before she could answer, Cadet Sulu came up behind her putting a hand on her shoulder clearly startling her.
"How's it going Nyota? We're still on for tonight, right?" Sulu asked. She frowned at him for a moment.
"Hikaru! You shouldn't sneak up behind people like that. You'll give someone a heart attack." She admonished leaving Sulu looking slightly guilty.
"Sorry, Nyota." He looked at Spock. "Wow! That exam was a killer professor Spock. Did you write it?" Sulu asked with an easy smile. Spock nodded. "Damn, you're tough."
Spock looked at his watch Jim would most likely be waiting for him by now. "It was pleasurable speaking to both of you, but I really must be going." Spock explained. Both Sulu and Uhura nodded and waved goodbye.
Spock quickly made his way to the cafeteria. He quickly found Jim at one of the smaller tables. He had already chosen his meal but hadn't started eating yet. Spock went through the line and paid for his meal returning to meet Jim. "Hey Spock, how has your day been?"
"It has been satisfactory Jim. How are you?" Spock began to eat his soup and salad and Jim was tearing through his own large tray of food.
"Great! We were in the simulation labs most if the day. It was epic. I got to shoot at things the whole morning." Jim confessed with a wink his eyes bright with mischief. Spock grinned at the thought. "Spock do you mind if I stop by your room tonight and hang out. Sulu finally convinced Uhura to take him up on his offer to teach her Japanese and they'll both be at the dorm tonight. I figured it would be mutually beneficially if I wasn't there to give them some privacy if you know what I mean." Spock raised an eyebrow but nodded in agreement. "Cool. I'll see you tonight then Spock." Jim exclaimed.
"I look forward to it Jim." Spock replied truthfully. Jim stretched in his chair unfurling his wings. Spock took a second to admire them. Even under the artificial lighting the in the cafeteria, his feathers seemed to gleam and shine. "Jim, I have spoken with my mother and she wishes to arrange to visit us at Starfleet before the end of my internship." Spock informed Jim.
"Really?" Jim asked. "It's a really long trip. That's a pleasant surprise." Spock agreed his parents had only made one trip to Starfleet for his graduation, although Jim had managed to make the trip several times before Spock graduated. "When do they want to come?"
"They did not give an exact date but informed me that they would tell me when they were sure." Spock said. Both he and Jim had finished their lunches. They put their trays away.
"When is your last class today Spock?" Jim asked as they made their way out of the cafeteria.
"1500 hours which will conclude at 1550. I will be free anytime after that." Spock replied.
"Ok Spock, my last class is at 1600. I'll probably drop about 1700." Jim said. "I have to get to my next class. See you later Spock." Jim said with a wave.
Chapter XXIV
James
Starfleet Academy, Earth Star date 2250
Jim knocked on Spock's door. Spock answered and let him in. Spock had changed out of his normal suit and tie, which he normally wore for teaching into jeans and a tee shirt. Jim did a double take while Spock still looked handsome in it; Jim had never seen him dressed so causally before. The room smelled awesome. Spock had a small kitchenette and as well as his own bathroom. He must have decided to cook. Jim was slightly ashamed that he hadn't even known that Spock knew how. "Sit down Jim. I cooked us dinner. I did not want to stain my clothing while cooking," Spock explained as Jim looked over his attire. The tee shirt was tight around his chest extenuating his wide muscular chest and shoulders but fit normally around his slim waist, while the jeans emphasized his tone butt and long legs. Jim blushed slightly; he shouldn't be looking at Spock that way. They were close friends. Despite this, Jim had found himself fantasying about and admiring Spock more and more lately. Jim was beginning to suspect he might be gay. While he could appreciate female beauty, the only one he seemed to want was Spock. He wasn't sure if it was true attraction or some type of misplaced love. Jim tried to shove it to the back of his mind for now.
Jim sat at the small dinette table. Spock brought over the food. It consisted of a wide variety of Vulcan traditional dishes. Jim was impressed. "Spock how did you get the ingredients for half of these dishes." Jim asked clearly puzzled.
"I was already in possession most of the required ingredients, but I was forced to make a number of modifications. I hope everything is to your liking." Spock explained as Jim began dishing out the food on to the plates for both of them.
Jim groaned when he started to eat. "Oh my god! Spock you missed your calling. You should have been a chef! Jim said as he continued to plow through the food. Spock looked slightly miffed at the comment.
"Illogical," Spock muttered. He then began eating. Jim just grinned at him.
"Spock after dinner would you play your lute for me? I haven't heard you play in years." Jim asked attempting to look innocent. He knew how rarely Spock played. Sarek had given him the instrument but music wasn't exactly revered on Vulcan.
"Of course, Jim. The lute is in the closet in the bedroom." Spock said. Jim jumped up to go get it while Spock finished eating. As Jim looked through the large walk in closet in search of the lute, came across an easel with a beautiful painting on it. It was a landscape that reminded Jim of the deep desert canyons found on Vulcan. Did Spock paint this, Jim wondered. Whoever the artist, they were clearly very talented. Why wasn't it hanging on wall for display? Jim would ask Spock about it. Jim spotted the lute in the corner and brought it out to Spock.
"Spock there was a beautiful painting in your closet. Who is the artist?" Jim asked as he handed Spock the lute. Spock flushed turning slightly green.
"I am, Jim. I have not painted in a very long time that painting was completed right before I left Vulcan for Starfleet." Spock looked away clearly ashamed by the admission.
"It's beautiful Spock. Why did you stop painting?" Jim asked.
"It is Illogical." Spock answered firmly.
Jim frowned deeply. Sometimes Jim wanted to kill Sarek. While he knew that Sarek loved Spock, he didn't seem to realize the hurt he unintentionally caused. "Spock painting is not illogical! You are obviously very talented and should continue if you enjoy it." Jim said.
Rather than answer, Spock began to play a beautiful Vulcan folk song. Jim felt a chill run up his spine as Spock began to sing along with the melody. Although the words were in Vulcan, Jim could understand enough to know that it was a ballad about war. Spock's voice was beautiful and the song had a haunting melancholy quality. God, he had no idea Spock could sing like that. The few times he had heard him play the pieces had been purely instrumental.
"Damn Spock your full of surprises tonight. That was beautiful." Jim said sincerely.
"Thank you, Jim." Spock replied as he put down the lute. Spock paused for a moment and seemed to be considering something. He took a deep breath and looked at Jim longingly. "Jim I would very much like to paint you. Would you model for me?" Spock asked flushing bright green. Jim was completely shocked but also very flattered.
"Of course Spock." Jim answered. Spock nodded and got up to retrieve the painting supplies. Jim sat dumfounded by both Spock's request and the strange way he had just looked at him. Jim felt another chill run his spine as he remembered it. Spock came back and began setting up the canvas and easel.
Chapter XXV
Spock
Starfleet Academy, Earth Star date 2250
Spock readied his art supplies. Once he had everything the way he wanted it, he glanced up at Jim. Jim was fidgeting. Spock frowned. He did not intend to make Jim nervous or uncomfortable. Just as was about to rescind his request, Jim cleared his throat and began to take off his clothing. "Jim it unnecessary to fully undress. I want to paint you from the waist up. If it does not make you too uncomfortable just remove your shirt." Spock requested. Jim looked relieved and smiled. "If you lean back on the coach and unfurl your wings, I would appreciate it. Beyond that, just sit however you feel most comfortable and try to move as little as possible."
Jim leaned back and opened his wings bringing them forward and angling them down criss-crossing them so they cocooned around him partially covering his legs creating an X shape. The effect was striking. Jim was still his shorts but his chest and lower legs were bare and his wings covered his waist and groin giving the illusion that he was nude. He rested his arms across the top of the coach. "This Ok Spock?" Jim asked flushing slightly.
"That is perfect Jim. I think I will paint your entire form in order to fully encompass your wings," Spock explained changing his mind as he took in pose that Jim had chosen. With the outside Jim's wings facing forward, the colors and patterns were more clearly visible than if he simply spread them out as Spock had first asked exposing just the inside. Spock took a minute to admire and study Jim's form. He was truly beautiful both inside and out. Spock felt his chest tighten as he looked at him. Spock felt a deep longing for what he was not precisely sure. Spock took a deep breath and began to paint.
Spock lost track of time as he painted. He only realized that nearly three hours had pasted when Jim told him he was getting stiff and requested a break. "Yes, of course. Forgive me Jim, I should have stopped sooner." Jim quickly got up and stretched heading to the restroom. Spock looked at the canvas at his work. He had completed the basic form but still needed to add fine details. He was very happy with the way the portrait was developing. This was Spock's first attempt at one; he had always painted landscapes. Spock closed his eyes and attempted to center his breathing. He was feeling emotional and was unsure of the cause. Spock was still unsure what had prompted him to ask Jim to pose for a portrait. He just had an illogical and intense desire to paint Jim and the question had just slipped out seemingly on its own volition. He needed to meditate. "Jim, I think we should stop for tonight," Spock said as Jim returned from the restroom.
"Are you sure, Spock? I can keep posing if you're still up to painting." Jim assured as he moved towards the coach to resume his pose. Spock shook his head with a wave.
"No Jim. I would prefer to finish this at a later date." Spock replied and began gathering his painting supplies. Jim looked slightly disappointed but said nothing. "I quite pleased with the portrait and will show it to you once it's completed." Jim nodded.
Chapter XXVI
James
Starfleet Academy, Earth Star date 2250
As Jim had his way back to his dorm, he still felt like the evening with Spock felt surreal and dreamlike. The way that Spock had played the lute and sang for him had been wonderful, then the request to paint his portrait surprising and faltering. Jim flushed as he remembered the way Spock had looked at him as he was painting likely totally unaware of the intense desire which had been written on his face. Then, as if pulled out of a trance, Spock had abruptly pulled back and Jim thought that maybe he was crazy and had completely imagined it leaving him confused and frustrated.
Jim wasn't sure whether he should confess the growing attraction that he had developed towards Spock. Jim was terrified that Spock would be offended and that Jim would lose his closest friend. But after tonight, Jim was certain that Spock felt more for him than just simple friendship even if he was not consciously aware of it. Jim was now more conflicted than ever. He wished that there was someone he could talk to about this before he made a decision. Jim bit his lip and decided to wait it out. Perhaps Spock would offer clues as how to proceed. Jim worried about talking to anyone for fear of developing gossip. Jim grimaced as he felt cramp in his low belly, but as quickly as it had come, it was gone. Jim knocked on the door to his dorm.
"Come on in Jim." Hikaru called. Jim entered.
"How was your tutoring session with Nyota?" Jim asked as he lay down on his bed stretching his wings. He would definitely need to fly tomorrow.
Sulu smiled. "Great I think Nyota's really warming up to me. She is going to meet me again next week for another session. I think I may ask her out to dinner." Sulu explained. Jim smiled. He was happy for Sulu but hoped that he wouldn't rush into anything and scare Nyota off.
"That's awesome Hikaru. I hope it works out." Jim said sincerely. He decided to leave it at that. After all, who was he to be giving dating advice?
"So, Jim, have you been seeing anyone special?" Sulu inquired. And I thought I was the mind reader. Jim thought and smirked at Hikaru's insight. Jim flushed and shook his head. "I find that really hard to believe Jim. You're a good looking and personable guy. I've also seen how the other cadets drool over you. Don't tell me you haven't noticed. Don't be shy, you can tell me." Jim flushed even more deeply. Sulu was right on that account. Jim had been propositioned more times than he could count. Although he had a strong desire for intimacy, he was still holding out for Spock for the time being.
"I don't kiss and tell Hikaru." Jim murmured evasively. Sulu just sighed. He gave Jim a resigned look and smirked.
"Fine. Go ahead and keep your secrets Jim." He said with a playful pout.
Jim chuckled. "It keeps people guessing." He said with a quick wink. "I'm beat Hikaru."
"Ok Jim. I can take a hint. I give up." Sulu stated with a roll of his eyes. Jim pulled up his covers and turned off the bedside lamp.
