OMG! Thank y'all soo much for the reviews on the first chapter! 15!

I realized that I forgot to mention when posting the last chapter that some of it was taken from the epilogue of Fairly Foolish in order to give a little background and start this story. Also to the person in the review who mentioned Benjamin and Brennen's names being close, I just chose a third name that I like really well and thought fit with the Fitz's so I's sorry if you think they are too close.

And to one guest review: Do we know the same family!? Lol I also know a family with three boys, two of which are Benjamin and Brennan!

I am so glad y'all are loving the confusion drama of the story! Trust me it only gets better and soon enough you will begin to find out what's wrong with Aria.

Enjoy this chapter!

Amanda


Chapter Two: If Time Could Stand Still

When I awake the next morning, soft sunlight is streaming across the room. I roll over and look at the clock. It reads fifteen minutes past nine A.M. How I actually managed to sleep for this long I have no idea, but I'm glad Ezra hasn't woken me. I climb out of bed, grab clean sweats and a t-shirt from my dresser and put them on. I stop on my way out of the room to glance at myself in the mirror; my hair is a mess so I quickly pull it up into a loose ponytail.

Ezra is sliding pancakes onto the twins' plates when I step into the kitchen. Brennen is sitting in his bouncy seat chewing on a teething ring, his empty bottle next to him.

"Good morning baby." Ezra says when he sees me. The twins turn around in their seats.

"Mommy! You're awake!" They shout in unison, jumping off their chairs and running into my open arms.

"Good morning love bugs." I say, kissing each of them on the head.

"Daddy made cakes!" Ben smiles, pointing at his plate. Ben and Lila have called pancakes 'cakes' since they were two, unable to say the whole word.

"I see that. Are they yummy?"

They both nod their heads. "Do you want some mommy?" Lila asks.

"Of course I do. Mommy's tummy is hungry."

"Daddy, mommy wants a pancake." Lila tells Ezra, who has already placed pancakes and fruit on our plates.

"Already done Lila-pie." He says.

Ezra puts our plates down on the table while I move Brennen onto the center of it, then we sit down next to the twins and begin eating.


After breakfast I help Ezra clean up the kitchen while the kids play in the living room. Ezra sneaks up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist as I place dishes in the dishwasher.

"Did you sleep okay last night?"

"Once I finally fell asleep, yes."

"When did you fall asleep?"

"A little after two."

Ezra shakes his head. "Aria, that medicine isn't doing its job very well if you're still having trouble falling and staying asleep."

I turn to face him. "Ezra, I've already changed meds once, I just think this one needs a little more time to work."

"But you've been on it for nearly two weeks and it has as much effect as the last one did. Maybe you should take some sleeping medicine before you go to bed."

I shake my head. "I can't, not with the medicine I'm taking, and then I will always have to rely on it to get me to sleep."

"Aria, it hurts me seeing you like this. The twins don't understand why you don't play with them like you used too."

I reach up to caress his cheek. "I'll get better. I just need more time. I'm sorry about last night."

"Oh baby. Don't apologize. You had a long day yesterday and that we both knew that a breakdown was coming. I know you need more time. You've come so far in just a few weeks. I just wish it wouldn't take so long to get you back."

"I know. I want to get back too." Ezra pulls me close to him, and we stand hugging each other for what feels like a lifetime, so long it seems, that my shattered soul should be put back together again when he finally lets go. But yet I'm still broken.


Shortly after we awake from an after-lunch nap, Ezra suggests that we take the kids to the park. The sun is shining, and all the snow left over from yesterday has completely disappeared, leaving soggy grass and streets that shimmer in the sunlight.

Ezra and I quickly pack up the kids and some snacks, along with some extra coats as the wintry chill still clings in the air. The neighborhood park is just a few blocks from our house, which makes for nice walks during the cool summer evenings, and caters fantastically well for children of all ages. Just a block down from the large wooden playground is the community pool and splash park; dozens of fountains of water spray upwards in the air during the summer for kids to run through.

We pull into the parking lot just a few minutes after four thirty P.M, Ben and Lila shouting excitedly in the backseat of the car.

"Look Lila there's the park!" Ben says animatedly, pointing out the window.

"Yay, daddy hurry and unbuckle us!"

"Hold on kiddo. Daddy only has one pair of hands."

"You know Lila, you and Ben could unbuckle yourselves. You two are big kids now remember?" I remind the twins as Ezra and I climb out of the car to open the back doors.

"But we don't know how mommy!" Ben says, as if I should know that.

"Well I will show you how."

"Okay, but first I want to go play!"

Ezra and I laugh. "I figured you probably would." I tell him as he climbs out of the car. "Ezra can you grab the stroller from the back?" Ezra nods.

"I'll help you daddy." Lila asks.

"Yep, but I need you to hold my hand okay Lila-pie?"

"Mhm!" Lila takes his hand and they move to the back of the car. My phone suddenly rings as I'm placing Brennen's car seat onto the stroller. I pull it out of my purse and look at the caller I.D.

Incoming Call: Mom

"Hey Ella." I say, answering the call.

"Hey sweetie, I just thought I'd call and see how you are."

"I'm doing good Mom. Ezra and I just got to the park with the kids." Lila and Ben tug on my free hand as we reach the end of the path. I nod, letting them know it's okay to go play. Ezra motions that he'll keep an eye on them so I sit down at a picnic table next to the stroller.

"Oh! I bet they were excited!"

"Oh yeah, they were."

"Good. I miss my grandbabies. So how was your visit with Emily, Spencer and Hanna yesterday?"

"It was good. I'm glad they all got to come over. Liam and Sophia are getting so big, Emily and Maya's little girl will be here in just a few weeks, and Spencer announced that she is expecting again."

"Oh how exciting! I will have to come over next time so I can see them all."

"Yeah, I'm sure they would love that."

"So, how are you really though sweetie?"

"Mom."

"Aria, I want to know. I worry about you."

I sigh, "I had a breakdown last night after everyone left. Ezra wanted to have sex, but I…I just couldn't do it. He thinks this new medicine isn't helping, but I want to try it out for a little longer."

"Aria, if it's not helping then you need to tell your doctor. This would be the second type of medicine they've given you that hasn't worked."

"It is helping Mom, though not too much."

"See, you need something that helps with everything you're experiencing."

"I'm tired of dealing with doctors' visits."

"Well honey, you're not going to get any better on your own. Your doctors are here to help you, and you know that, so let them."

I sigh again. "Alright, I'll give this medicine another week and if I'm still not improving I'll go back to the doctor."

"Thank you honey. I just want the best for you and I know what you're going through is difficult, but you can get through it. You've always been good at getting through difficult things, and you have an amazing support team here for you. Just don't forget that okay?"

"Okay."

"Alright. I'll let you enjoy your time at the park with Ezra and the kids okay?"

"Alright. Thanks mom."

"I love you sweetie. And tell Ezra and those babies that I love them too."

"I will. Love you mom."

"Bye."

"Bye."

Brennen coos and I look over the side of the stroller into his car seat.

"Hey bud," I smile, caressing his soft cheek. "Let's go swing with your brother and sister." I stand and push the stroller across the grass and into the bark at the edge of the playground. Lila and Ben are swinging side by side, Ezra playfully pushing them higher and higher. They smile when they see me carrying Brennen over.

"Mommy, are you going to come swing with us?" Ben asks.

"Yep, and Brennen is going to swing too!"

"Yay!"

"Mommy watch me!" Lila says, pumping her legs forward and back.

"Good job Lila! Ben can you pump your legs?"

"Yeah! See?"

"Good job baby! You two are getting so big!" The twins grin, pumping their legs and swinging higher. In the moment, even with so much on my mind, it's hard not to be happy and proud as I push Brennen in the swing and watch Lila and Ben excited over their new accomplishment.