Memories II
BY: Stupiak Kitty


A/N: I do not want my favorite couple to be sad for the rest of their lives. That's the main reason why this sequel was born. The short story made me cry, so if you want to cry more…

Most of my one-shot stories are tragic or sad, (because I'm a sucker for those kinds of stories) so please expect a chuck full of angsty and painful scenes before they could have their happy ever after. Ehehehe. I'm still on the aftermath of my other story, Lured. So forgive me if I'm going to torture them again. :Dv

Thank you for the people who reviewed, faved, alerted and cried with me by the way. Lol. I give you this!

I think I'm going to cry even before starting the story. D: I wonder if I'm a masochist.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything, except for the story and my inspiration.

WARNING FOR DRAMA, ANGST AND MAJI DRAMA SCENES!

If you want more dramatic effects, you know what to do. Please listen to the songs written below. :D


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Chapter's Theme Songs:

Amaoto

- Ono Daisuke
Sekai ga Owaru Yoru
- ACIDMAN

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Two more years after

I

Takao moved his hands to shield his eyes as he focused his gaze on the setting sun. It was not as bright as the normal sun on mornings or afternoon; in fact, it was comforting to look at. He was trying to look at it, to observe it more clearly until it goes down beyond the horizon.

Watching the sun as it set is his regular pastime whenever he has the time, his day off, or in deep thought.

Today's case is all of the above.

He stood up from where he was sitting and walked further on his veranda when the trees was now obscuring his view of the orange sun. He placed both his elbows on the railings and rested his hands below his chin.

He stayed there until he could see the little shining dots appearing on the sky one after another. It was amazing to see how the surroundings darkened in gradual moment, until all that he could see is the shadows of the trees around their house and the dark blue night sky filled with dazzling stars.

For some reasons, doing this brought sadness and sense of familiarity to Takao. He was not sure why, but he felt as if he was doing this his entire life with someone. Somewhere in his faded memory, he could picture a scene where he was sitting on the sand beside with someone he doesn't know. As far as he could recall, they were watching the sun as it sets until the moon and the stars appear on the sky.

It was not clear, just like a tapered scene in a dream so he figured it was a random part in one of his dreams.

Even so, doing this gave him both contradicting feelings of sorrow and happiness.

"Papa?"

Flinching, Takao turned around and saw his older daughter peeping on the sliding door. "Do you need something, Kazuko-chan?"

She went next to him before looking at him. "Papa…"

"Hmmm…?" He gave her a small smile, but it faded out when his daughter's eyes starts to water. He gave her a concerned look. "W-what's wrong? Is there something wrong with your younger sister or what?"

"P-papa," Takao began to panic when he saw a single tear slid down her pale face, but his emotions subsided when she continued, "Is mama really never coming back again?"

The question made him gulp.

Caressing her hair with gentle hands, Takao crouched down and said, "Mama had decided to go and live by herself for the mean time. Her sudden decision is something you won't understand until you grow up, so I'm asking you not to be mad at mama for leaving us. If you love her, then let's respect your mama's decision."

He gulped to control his emotions when his daughter starts sobbing. "But M-mama doesn't love us anymore, does she?"

"Oh, she loves you and your younger sister more than anything else in the world. She loves us more than she loves herself," He answered as he tried to control the urge to cry as well. "S-she loved us too much that she's willing to give up anything, even her own happiness, just to give me mine."

Takao controlled the urge to sigh. This kind of conversation is something an innocent young girl wouldn't understand, but regarding their situation, it can't be helped.

"Please don't hate mama, okay? If there's someone who is at fault here, then it is papa," He went on. "This isn't what I wanted from the start. I never wanted us to be a broken family. I didn't want Kazuko-chan and your sister to have that kind of family. Please forgive him for failing his duty to be a responsible father."

"Don't say like that, papa," She said, her voice almost chiding. "Papa is always working for us — always there to clean my sister's nappy, always reading me stories if I can't sleep, helping me with my homework, playing with me and cooking us delicious food even when he's busy. Isn't that what responsible means?" Takao can't help but smile with that. "For me, papa is the perfect papa that I know in the whole world. Maybe mama doesn't know about this yet that's why she left us."

That was the moment when he sighed. Hearing the sincere words coming from his daughter felt like it was mocking him. This is the time where he could see nothing but his entire flaws.

He really is a selfish prick.

He had thought of the consequences of his actions for a thousand times, but seeing the result of it that was now happening before him made him reconsider his chosen path.

Is it really worth it? Obeying the plea of his heart, but sacrificing the welfare of his family. Letting the woman who loved him more than anything else did go, just because he was unsure and confused of the feelings that he was harboring deep within.

There was no doubt, nothing is more important to Takao than his family. All that he wanted is to give everything what they deserve: Education, home, and a loving and complete family.

With that said, he was grateful for the hospital authorities that they allowed him to make the half of his dreams come true. Because of them, they now owned a small yet comfortable house that they could call their home. As far as he knows, he was the only non-employee living inside the premises of the hospital. Their neighborhood — all of them were workers and employees of the prestigious building.

All of their expenses — water, electricity, even food — was all hospital-funded.

Even his older daughter's education was theirs to pay. She was studying at a school owned by the hospital as well, so he has no worries for his child's safety since the school is adjacent and a part of the infirmary's premises. They also assured the education of his one-year-old daughter, telling him that there was nothing to worry about because they have already sponsored all of his expenses regarding the future of his two kids.

He was uncertain and always curious as to why they had granted this kind of luxury to a random man such as himself. He was only a regular working man with a pay that could give them a normal suitable life. Although it is unlikely that his minimum pay could help them live like this, if the hospital authorities haven't thought of this set-up.

At all times, he wanted to question if he had done something remarkable to one of the high-positioned hospital employees for him to receive a special treatment just like this, but the shy part of him would always emerge whenever this topic is of concern.

It was strange, but some part of his early life was blurry to him. It felt like he had skipped fifteen years of his life and live at this moment of time.

His parents or his sister never told him anything regarding this, only advising him to be grateful with the blessings he had received and live his life aptly.

Takao always consider how special he is to deserve something like this. He had nothing else to wish for but his own family's happiness.

But as they always say, nothing in this world is perfect.

Because God forbid, he realized that he was attracted with the same gender as him. He is attracted to a certain doctor that was so nice to him — the doctor who was always there whenever he wanted to talk to someone, or wanted to accompany him wherever he wants to.

As it seems, he became conscious with the fact that he was in love with Midorima-san.

Takao first thought that his attraction was just an admiration for the man's current job. He had always been curious about the doctor's task; the way they cure and heal people, how amazing it is to do something as meticulous and complex duty such as performing a surgery, or even how courageous they are to do that.

He knew that he has no talent regarding that, but if only he had the chance to choose his career, he wanted to be a nurse. He wanted to help them with those complicated tasks. He wanted to support them.

Fate has another task for him to do, however.

With that hidden desire living inside him, he found himself admiring Midorima-san. The way he approached his patients with that reserved and business-like demeanor of his, the way he always push that glasses of his and how keen he is to keep his fingers in good condition, Takao was fascinated with that.

He knew how busy Midorima-san's schedule is, but he would always have the time to visit him, bring him gift or have an idle chat with him. He also knew how popular and elite the kind doctor is — he is one of the head doctors in the hospital, while his father is the vice president in the same aforementioned medical institution.

Regardless that, he was always there as if he isn't one of the elites and an important person inside the premises of the hospital. He was the most friendly and humble doctor that he had known, despite the rumors about him being the most eccentric and unsociable neurologist.

He first thought that the respect and the deep feelings he had for the doctor was nothing but a fancy admiration. It was then when he began to consider it as a serious case the moment when he felt the strange irking feeling within him whenever he sees him with a companion — be it a woman or a man.

Takao confirmed that it was none other than love when he saw Midorima-san with that man with red locks. The said man was shorter than he was by several inches, but seeing how the man moved was enough to tell that he is superior to the green-haired doctor.

When Takao saw them walking together inside the hospital lobby one day, with Midorima-san conversing with the red-haired man while holding that small sincere smile that was so rare for him to do, seeing that irritated him to the fullest.

Even he was shocked with himself when he began thinking…

I should only be the one making him smile. Not with anyone or that short man, I wanted it to be just me.

His jealousy confirmed it all.

The revelation was so shocking and disturbing that he had it hidden deep within him. He knew how wrong it is to be attracted with someone — more so with the same gender as him.

He had someone in his life already. He is a man blessed with two kids and a loving wife.

He loved his family so much. He didn't want to destroy it because of this unrequited forbidden love. He didn't want them to judge him, or the people judging his family because of his desire for another man. Takao was aware how impossible it is for Midorima-san to be attracted with someone the same gender as him. He cannot deny how handsome and manly Midorima-san is, more to the fact that his way of living is not as ordinary as Takao's.

He knew all that.

But whenever he meet him, his feelings would deepened — his attraction for the doctor would increase that it's starting to bother him. For years, he hid it all alone — telling himself how immoral it is to desire for someone other than his wife.

Wherever you look at it, it is just indecent.

With that in mind, Takao tried to resist the temptation. He used all his self-control to act normal in front of Midorima-san and treating him as if he's just a random friend of his.

But then again, Takao knew, deep inside his heart, that he was doing it all wrong.

He felt as if he was fooling his self. He was lying, not only to himself, but to his family — especially his wife. He knew how she loved him so dearly she even sacrificed her dreams just for the sake of taking care of their family.

She was truly sincere to him. But what was he doing? In a way, he was betraying her. Takao was disgusted with his own self whenever he found himself thinking about the green-haired doctor whenever his wife and he coupled. It disgusted him to think that he needed to think of the doctor in order to reach the apex of his pleasure.

He couldn't help but be depressed. It has been a burden to him. He first thought that he was just confused or being delusional because of stress, but hiding it for two long years didn't help him forget about the disturbing feeling for the doctor.

He decided to do what he thought was right. He was aware that doing this would raise difficult consequences, but he did so despite that knowledge. He couldn't take the fact that he was betraying his own family just to hide his true feelings.

Last two months, he confessed to his wife.

Despite knowing how this would turn out, it still shocked him when his wife decided to let him go just like that. She never told him anything, never lashed him out with harsh words, and never even mocked him.

Instead, she only cried. She accepted it without complaint. She only gave him those words that were still stuck inside his mind.

"Somehow for some reasons, I wasn't surprised by hearing this. You always talked about that doctor more than you talk about me, or your daughters."

"I'm not disappointed at you. I'm disappointed with myself for not noticing this early. This is so painful and depressing that I don't know what to say."

"I love you more than anything, Kazu-kun. I know that you are aware of that. You don't know how happy I am to have you and our two lovely daughters in my life. But knowing that you are in love with someone else — with a man, is shocking to me. It's…i-it's…"

"I'm sorry, but I think that it's wise if we just get a divorce and separate. I know how we wanted to have a happy and complete family, but I don't think that we could have that now. I wanted you to love me, and only me. If I beg you to forget about him and focus that love to me, will you be able to do that?"

"You don't have to answer that because I already know. When you confessed about that love, I understood what that meant already. Knowing this kind of information is killing me."

"It…it is killing me, Kazu-kun. I can't be here with you anymore."

"When I get back, I'll fix the custody of my daughters and bring them both to me."

His greediness had not only destroyed what he thought was a perfect family, but it was the source of the possibility of living his life without his daughters.

Thinking about that brought tears from his eyes. He was not sure if he could survive a life like that. He also couldn't tell this to his oldest yet, he can't take it if she were to resist and demand to be with him.

It is true that a man is the maker of his own problems.


TBC

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Started: January 10, 2015

CHAPTER OPEN FOR EDITING