'Bad Luck'

Part 2

Waluigi and Wario walked through the store, Waluigi trying hard not to blush. They came to the section they were supposed to be in. Looking furtively around Waluigi sneakily reached out selecting the brand he needed, moaning. Just then a gentle voice said, "Well, well, if it isn't Waluigi and Wario."

Waluigi cried out in terror, clinging to the package then diving behind Wario, face bright red. "R-R-R-R-Rosalina," he stammered. His breath caught as he gasped, "Daisy!"

"Peach, Mona," Wario greeted.

"Who are the adult diapers for?" Mona questioned.

Wario opened his mouth to reply, but Waluigi leapt up exclaiming, "Professor E. Gadd! Yeah, that's who! S-see h-his age finally caught up with him. He, uh, asked us to, uh, pick these up for him because he was too humiliated to do it himself."

"What!" Wario asked. Turning to the women he said, "They're a for Waweegee."

Waluigi burst into maniacal fake laughter and put an arm over his brother's shoulders squeezing viciously. Through a fake grin and forced tight voice he said, "Wahahahaha, my brother! He's such a kidder! Aren't you Wario!"

"I..." Wario began, but Waluigi dug his claw like fingers deep into his shoulder and scowled at him viciously.

"Aren't you Wario," he menacingly growled.

"Uh, y-yeah, a k-kidder," Wario nervously stammered.

Peach sympathetically put a hand daintily over her mouth and said, "Oh the poor, poor man. I feel so bad for him. It's so sweet of you to do this for him."

"It is, but my question is why would you?" Daisy asked. "I mean, Elvin Gadd is Luigi's friend and Mario's. I mean I could see it with Dr. Crygor, but since when are you friends with Gadd too? Even if you were I can't see you two villains doing something nice for him, no offence," Daisy suspiciously added.

"Uhhhhh..." Both men tried to say.

Rosalina raised a suspicious eyebrow then said, "Well I suppose he offered money. Either that or something else is going on. Is this another strange plan of yours?"

"Y-yeah, he offered money. No plans or anything like that," Waluigi quickly said, grateful that Rosalina had opened that line of reasoning. They would do anything for money.

"Typical Wario," Mona said with a smile. "Nothing makes sense with you."

Sternly Peach said, "I hope you're not planning anything with those. Mario will stop you."

"So will Luigi," Daisy added, slightly upset that Peach never acknowledged him.

"Yeah right! We rule!" Wario yelled. "Now get out of here! What are you even doing in this section!"

They looked at him like he was an idiot. Waluigi pursed his lips and face palmed his own face shaking his head. "Uh, Wario, this is where girls get their, err, sanitary products," Waluigi tried to explain.

"We need pads," Daisy simply said. It was now Wario's turn to blush deep red. Awkwardly Waluigi grabbed another package putting them in the cart, and the two men walked away from the group of giggling women.

"My life sucks," Waluigi moaned as they reached Wario's castle mansion. "I wish I were dead."

"I'll be glad to grant that wish if we have to keep going through things like that for the rest of your sorry miserable life," Wario grumbled. He smelled the air then scowled at Waluigi. Waluigi sighed then entered the bathroom. Soon he came out to see Wario impatiently tapping his foot.

Ignoring the agitated look he continued pitying himself saying, "If the girls find out my life is a over."

"Your life was over before it started," Wario replied.

"Well now it's a doubly over!" Waluigi yelled. He crinkled his nose then sobbed, "Triple over." he then re-entered the washroom. Wario shook his head half hopelessly half pityingly.

"Ah well, his problem, not mine," Wario said quietly out loud.

"Hey Wario, how strong are these pills!" Waluigi called from the washroom.

Wario looked at the door shocked at the question. "Uh, strong. Don't take anymore than two if you're in pain."

"How many to kill a man!" Waluigi asked.

"Wally get out of the washroom or I'll break down the door!" Wario yelled in an angry tone, yet secretly slightly concerned about the line of questioning.

"Fine!" Waluigi shouted back as he left. Wario grabbed Waluigi and pried open his mouth examining it for pills.

"How many did you take?" he asked.

"None," Waluigi replied defensively. "What sort of idiot do you think I am Wario! No, don't answer," he quickly said.

"I didn't plan to," Wario replied. The two went to their living room and sat to watch TV.

For a long time no one talked. Waluigi got up more than once to go to the bathroom. Wario was getting annoyed. Waluigi sat down finally and sighed. He then said, "You know, had you ever seen something like that thing in our..."

"My," Wario corrected.

"Your, yard before?" Waluigi asked.

Wario thought a moment then replied, "No."

Waluigi rubbed his chin and mused, "Then how did it get there?"

"Someone probably put it there," Wario casually said. It was then that he sat up straight. Waluigi's eyes brightened in realization.

The two met each others eyes and Waluigi said, "Then who?"

Wario scowled then replied, "Syrup."

"I doubt that," Waluigi retorted. "Not everything is her and Mario's fault."

"Yes it is," Wario replied. Waluigi opened his mouth to protest, but when he thought about it Wario was almost completely right. Who could it be?

Meanwhile, in the Dark Land, Bowser laughed evilly. "Bwahaha, my plan is working," he declared.

"You mean your plan to make Wario's Wario waft even more deadly and powerful?" Kammy sarcastically remarked. At his scowl she added, "Uh, your royal Koopaliness."

Bowser nodded, satisfied at her cover, then continued, "No! My plan to make him almost completely useless! With all the bathroom breaks he'll have to take he'll be a pushover! Less competition for me! How can he fight when he's having accidents every few minutes?"

"It's only temporary though," Kammy warned. "We'll, I mean you'll, have to act fast to take his castle and destroy him and his brother."

"It's a long temporary effect. Five months to five years is plenty of time," Bowser remarked.

"There may be other factors you've missed though. Iggy has conducted experiments with that Bean Mushroom you used, and with poison mushrooms the effect is doubled to ten months to ten years. With a more grim contributing factor from Ludwig he found the effects could be made permanent," Kammy said.

"All the better," Bowser replied. "What is this grim contributing factor?"

Kammy whispered it to him. Bowser's smile fell. He became angry and annoyed then demanded, "Where would he get an idea like that from! Am I missing something! Is he not telling me things! I swear, if anyone has..."

"No your nastyness, he's a clever boy though. He knows what it is and read up on the causes of incontinence," she hurriedly explained. "He found a mention of that there."

"That boy has got to stop reading," Bowser grumbled. "Why can't he be more like Lemmy, or Junior, yeah, Junior. Lemmy never takes anything seriously, and Junior can't stand books. Just like his old man."

Kammy sighed saying, "Yes your highness."

Meanwhile at the Mario bros house Luigi was sitting shocked at Mario's news. After a moment Mario asked, "Weegie?"

Luigi shook his head then looked at Mario asking, "Really?"

"Really," Mario confirmed.

"Oh boy, this is bad," Luigi said looking down once more.

"He won't tell Wario," Mario said.

"Then you should," Luigi stated.

"Not with our lives being in jeopardy, and why not you?" Mario replied.

"I can't, I hate Waluigi. I have no sense of obligation towards him, but man do I feel sorry for him," Luigi answered.

Mario sighed then sat next to him on the examining table, still in doctor Mario garb. "Luigi, we've a got to figure this out. We have to a figure out who did this, and if Bowser has anything to do with the comic part I neglected to a tell you."

"Is there one?" Luigi asked.

"You have no clue," Mario replied with a slight chuckle.

"Well now would be a good time to hear it," Luigi pouted.

Mario patted his brother's shoulder replying, "Maybe later."

Meanwhile the four girls were standing at the checkout line-up for the store. Daisy remarked curiously, "You know, something didn't ring true about Waluigi and Wario's story. I don't trust them. I think they're hiding something."

"At least Waluigi. Wario's clueless," Rosalina agreed.

"He is not," Mona defended.

"Yes he is. As for their story, are you sure it wasn't on the level?" Peach questioned.

"Almost certain," Daisy firmly nodded.

Peach then said, "Hmm, I'll get Mario and Luigi to keep a watch on those two then. I can't be too careful with my kingdom."

"I still say they aren't up to anything really truly evil. Wario's all about making money, not taking over kingdoms. That's Waluigi's speed, but he won't do anything without Wario," Mona said.

"Yes he will. He stole music notes once," Peach said.

"She means she thinks he's incapable or too cautious to effectively go through with it. Wario's the headstrong one who charges into situations. Waluigi would dance around everything until he was certain it was perfect," Daisy said.

"From what I've heard of them Waluigi comes up with brainstorm plans without much development and Wario encourages him to go through with them. He doesn't have time to think it over. Wario rushes him right along. If he put effort into some plans I bet they'd come through," Rosalina said.

"Anyway, we can't rely on the Mario bros alone to watch them. We should keep an eye on them too, shouldn't we? I mean I think it would be a good idea," Daisy said hesitantly.

"We will. I have the best vantage point of you all," Rosalina said. "Peach can watch the kingdom for them, Mona can watch Wario at work, and Daisy can keep an eye on Waluigi from the sports fields. I'll watch them both from the stars."

"All right, let's go spy on Wario and Waluigi," Peach relented.

"It's not spying, just keeping a close cautious eye on them," Mona said. With that they paid for their purchases and left the store breaking into their four separate directions.