Disney owns the characters; I'm just taking them for a test drive.
----
Growing up with a world saving big sister had exposed Jim and Tim Possible to a lot of weird and over the top things over the course of their young lives, but this was a new one on them. It was true that they once had to tangle with their sister when she was under the influence of a compliance chip, but the only reason they had tagged along in the first place was because Kim was babysitting them when she went on that particular mission. In fact, this was the first time that they had ever been targeted by one of their sister's foes. Now they were being held in what looked like an enormous underground manufacturing plant; hydraulic presses and conveyor belts were humming with activity. The Tweebs had to admit to being a little envious. The things they could build with this kind of equipment.......
"All right you two wannabe clone dudes, this is the deal." Motor Ed stood before them in all his mullet headed glory. "You two seriously ripped off my super Roth idea."
"No we didn't," Jim protested.
"We came up with that idea ourselves, right around the time you stole our dad's rocket!" Tim added.
"Shut it!" Ed bellowed. "I didn't ask for your life story. Seriously. Now where was I? Oh yeah! Since you ripped off my old awesome idea, you have to finish building my new awesome idea! I may be the man with the plan when it comes to building sweet rides, but with robotics and stuff like that, well, even a mechanical master like me needs an extra wrench, you know what I'm sayin'?" Ed pulled a switch on the wall, turning on a spot light. The light was shining directly on a partially completed armored motorcycle. "This my new baby; my brand spankin' new totally awesome plan. This bike can turn into a suit of power armor. Seriously. Or it will after you two are done with it."
"I hate to break it to you," Tim said, "but science fiction beat you to the punch on that one, too."
"Those geeks had the idea, but no one's ever built one before me. Yeaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!!!" Ed broke into an air guitar solo. "This is gonna be so sweet!"
Jim and Tim took a closer look at the souped up two wheeler. "This thing is one solid metal piece," Tim pointed out.
"And there is no way that this frame can be segmented to allow any sort of transformative functions," Jim added.
"It's a wash," they completed in unison.
"It's a prototype," Ed scowled. "And if you two ever wanna see your babes again, you'll build me a new one that can do what I want it to. If you don't, you're gonna regret it." Ed picked up a large wrench and brandished it like a war hammer. "Seriously."
----
The Sloth raced along the freeway at breakneck speeds. Stacy and Tracy Hopkins, the Tweebs' girlfriends, sat uneasily in the back seat, trying to remain calm. They knew who Kim Possible was when they started dating Jim and Tim. They knew the kind of people she went up against on a semi-daily basis. They even knew that there was the chance of being drawn into some kind of freak fight. The reality of it all was almost more than they could handle.
"You two holding up okay back there?" Kim asked.
"Define 'okay,'" Tracy huffed.
"Ah yes, the first super villain experience," Ron said in a nostalgic tone. "I still remember ours like it was yesterday."
"How can you be so calm?" Stacy demanded. "That whack job has your brothers!"
"You think I'm not scared?" Kim shot back. "Like you said, he has my brothers. We may get on each other's nerves, like, constantly, but they're still my brothers. If you think this isn't tearing me up...."
Ron put a reassuring hand on his wife's shoulder. "We'll get them back, KP."
Stacy hung her head in shame. "I'm sorry."
"It's all good," Ron said. "But we gotta keep our heads in the game, y'know." A lopsided grin crossed Ron's features. "Besides, this is the Tweebs were talking about! Motor Ed might be in for a world of hurt from them! This could be over and done with before we even get there." Ron saw the skeptical look on his wife's face. "What? It could happen. Maybe."
----
For as brilliant as Jim and Tim were, they weren't robotics experts. Even with some of the cyber robotic schematics Ed had lifted from Felix Renton's wheelchair, this was going to be tricky to say the least. With the armor plating, weaponry, and engine components, the bike would be much too heavy for someone to wear as a suit of armor. Even with the suit itself supporting its own weight, there was no way it could move under its own power; they couldn't figure a way to incorporate any kind of servo motors that could be converted and stored away in vehicle mode.
"This guy's seen Armorauders a few too many times," Tim groused.
"Hickabicka duh," Jim replied. "I think Kim and Sheila kicked this guy in the head one time too many. I mean, this thing just isn't gonna move in armor mode! We're gonna need some kind of secondary system to act as a base."
"Great, armor on top of armor," Tim grumbled. "This thing's gonna weigh a couple of tons if we're not careful. Unless....."
The twins grinned. "Exoskeletal frame!" they declared at once.
Jim stood up and stretched his back out. "Come on, bro, let's go see what other toys Ed has that we can play with."
----
"A junkyard?' Tracy asked.
"So obvious," Kim replied. The tracking signal from the Timmunicator led them to the Lowerton Landfill. Kim was a little uneasy being here, since an underground fighter called Bengal had once lured her here, using the ironic ruse of a Motor Ed sighting, to abduct her and force her to fight. She subconsciously reached for Ron's hand and squeezed tightly.
"Just like old times," Ron mused. "At least we're not in New Jersey this time. Not a Bueno Nacho to be seen in the whole state! I mean, what's a guy supposed to do when he has a naco craving?" Rufus nodded his agreement from Ron's shoulder.
"Does he always get this distracted?" Stacy asked, trying not to giggle.
"Only when he's awake," Kim smirked. She called Wade on the Kimmunicator. "Any idea what direction the signal is coming from?"
"Do you really need to ask?" The young genius' fingers danced over his keyboard. Wade's image faded and was replaced by an electronic compass. "Head to the south east about a hundred and fifty feet, then look for some kind of entrance. It looks like they're about twenty feet underground."
----
"I am not wearin' this. Seriously I'm not." Motor Ed was looking at an exoskeletal frame that the Tweebs had just finished fabricating. "It's just not, you know, manly enough. You know?" The offending item was only half finished. It was made up of support struts that had specialized connection ports on the shoulders, arms, legs, and torso. As of right now, there were several gaps in the frame's shell; some of them were awaiting sheets of lightweight metal plating, some were like that by design to allow interface junctures for components from the bike.
"Look, dude," Jim said, "there's no way for us to incorporate any sort of autonomous locomotion system into the bike with the way it's designed."
"You wanna be able to move," Tim added, "you wear that. The armor is a two part system. The exoskeleton makes the bike move when it's in armor mode. Not only that," he picked up the gauntlets and showed them to Ed, "but there are interface ports that connect the exoskeleton to the bike's navigation system, right here in the fingers. These are connected to a neural transcriber that'll be built into the helmet. You'll be able to drive this thing just by thinking about it."
"Gnarly," Ed replied, just before going into yet another air guitar solo. "But that helmet needs some serious work! I want the mullet to flow freely, y'know? I want to feel the wind in my hair as I wreak havoc on the road. Seriously."
Jim and Tim shared a quick, sly smirk. "Don't worry," Jim said.
"We're gonna pay special attention to the helmet."
----
"Are all your foes this eccentric?" Tracy asked.
"Pretty much," Kim replied. "Just be glad we're not dealing with Professor Dementor. You would so need earplugs." The compass display on the Kimmunicator started flashing, indicating that they had reached their destination. "Now we just look for a door."
"Does that watch thingie of yours have a door detector?"
"Not needed, Tracy," Ron said in a triumphant tone. "There is no hidden entrance in existence that can remain hidden from the world's greatest door finding master!" Rufus popped proudly out of his person's cargo pocket and scampered to the ground. He quickly charged into a pile of old engine blocks.
"What, so we're supposed to just stand here and wait?" Stacy was getting more and more impatient by the minute.
"You can't rush perfection," Ron said.
"Found it," a small voice squeaked.
"No hidden entrance in the world is so well hidden for that Rufus can't find it." Ron gave his little buddy a high one when Rufus climbed back onto his shoulder.
A small mountain of refuse split in half and opened to reveal a ramp leading to an underground garage. The motorcycles Ed's goons had used were parked in rows on either side of the chamber, but there wasn't a gear head to be seen.
"Okay, this is where the sitch gets dangerous," Kim said. "You two are staying out here. Ron, Rufus and I can handle this."
"What?" Stacy protested. "We want to help get Jim and Tim back!"
"I know you do, but this really is too dangerous." Kim could see that Tracy was about to argue the point. "When I started doing missions, I already knew kung fu. I know sixteen forms now, and Ron here is one of the few to master of Tai Sheng Pek Kwar."
Tracy's eyes grew to the size of dinner plates. "You know monkey kung fu?" she asked Ron.
"A-booyah."
"The point is," Kim said, regaining control of the conversation, "we knew how to handle ourselves when we started this." Kim left out the fact that Ron had no martial arts skills when they formed Team Possible, or that he got by on 'dumb skill' back in the old days. "Besides, we know Motor Ed and what he's capable of." She handed Stacy the keys to the Sloth. "Go wait for us in the car. If we're not back in thirty minutes, call Wade."
"This isn't fair," Stacy said with venom in her voice.
"Neither is life, now get going!" Kim waited until the Hopkins twins vanished from sight before entering the lair.
"That was a little harsh, KP."
"I know," she conceded. "I'll apologize later. The last thing we need right now is a couple of newbies who don't have their heads in the game getting in our way. Now let's go and find the Tweebs."
----
Motor Ed fastened the last of the exoskeleton into place. This still doesn't look manly, he thought. Not that it mattered; this was only a test drive. He would give it a seriously wicked paint job later to spruce it up. Ed was mostly covered in metal from neck to toe. Most of the frame was covered with thin pieces of plate armor, while the interface junctures had a layer of leather to protect the rider from any unforeseen road mishaps, yet still allow the motocycle to connect when in armor mode. The last piece was the helmet. It was metal around the back of the skull with a clear hard plastic faceplate. As requested, Ed's hair flowed from the back.
Jim and Tim stood back and admired their handiwork. They had only built one suit of power armor before, and it never even got a road test. Kim had worn it when she was in search for new mission gear, and it had met defeat at the hands of Dr. Drakken and a large electromagnet. The failure of their invention had been disheartening, but they quickly moved on to the next project. Now, for the first time in their young lives, Jim and Tim hoped that their invention wouldn't work. Especially the bike.
The new bike looked identical to the first, only it was made of segmented components. The new bike also had pulse lasers on the sides that could be used when in armor mode. The Tweebs had built dangerous things before, but nothing that was designed to intentionally cause chaos and mayhem. This proves it, they thought. We are not cut out to be mad scientists or super villains.
A red light started flashing on the ceiling. "Looks like we have intruders," Ed smirked. "Time to give my new ride a test drive. Seriously."
----
Kim and Ron stopped suddenly when they heard a motorcycle engine being gunned. "That can't be good," Kim said.
"Kim! Ron! Run!!!!!!" they heard the Tweebs yell.
"That is so not good!" Kim shouted as she and Ron took off like shots, sprinting back the way they came. Ron looked over his shoulder and saw Motor Ed riding an armored motorcycle, wearing some sort of metal suit, with the Tweebs being brought along for the ride by a couple of gear heads. As they approached the lair's entrance, they heard Ed's air guitar yell. When Kim looked back she saw the pulse lasers on the sides of his bike charge up. "Scatter!" Kim and Ron narrowly avoided the searing red beams.
"I'll bet you're wishing you brought the battle suit," Ron panted.
"Maybe I need to start putting it in the trunk before each mission."
Motor Ed skidded to a halt just a few short feet from Team Possible. When they got a good look at him they couldn't help but snicker at the ridiculous mishmash or leather and metal he wore. "Don't be dissing my armor, Red. It's seriously not cool."
"Dude, if you bought that from Jack Hench, I'd ask for a refund," Ron said between giggles.
"What did I just say, skinny dude?" Ed warned. "You wouldn't want anything bad to happen to Red's little bros, now would you?"
Kim's eyes narrowed. "Where are they, squirrel head?"
"Right here." The two gear heads shoved the Tweebs towards their sister. "They did what I wanted them to do. Seriously."
"Is there something about you we don't wanna know?" Ron asked. "I mean, that's not your normal stuff, you know?"
"He made us build it," Jim said.
"We could've done a better job if we weren't under the gun. Or if we had better tools."
"There's nothing wrong with Motor Ed's tools!" Ed gunned the engine again. "Time to see what this baby can do. Seriously."
"Sorry, but no," Jim said. He took out his Jimmunicator and hit a sequence of keys. "We built in an emergency shut down."
"It's part of the neural circuitry in the helmet." Tim gave his sister a grin. "It's not like we were just gonna let him have this thing."
"Emergency shut down? You mean this?" Ed produced a small chip. "Yeah, I checked out the systems before I put this thing on. Seriously, I didn't trust you two as far as the skinny dude's hairless rat thing can trow you."
"So much for that idea," Jim said in an uneasy voice.
"Do I wanna know what that thing does?" Ron asked. His eyes glowed a violent blue as he prepared to unleash the Mystical Monkey Power.
"You're gonna find out. Seriously." Ed pressed a button on the handlebars, and the bike started to break apart. The handlebars, wind screen, and headlights attached to Ed's chest. The rear sections segmented and connected to the arms and legs, covering the sections of the exoskeleton that had no armor plating. The engine assembly connected to Ed's back, the pulse lasers to his forearms, and the wheels attached to his shoulders. "Meet the new and improved Motor Ed," he sneered. "I'm gonna enjoy this. Seriously."
----
Stacy and Tracy hadn't gone back to the Sloth, but now they wished they had. They were frozen in place, watching helplessly as a guy wearing a motorcycle started firing lasers at their boyfriends. They screamed out, which gave away their hiding place to Motor Ed.
"Stacy!"
"Tracy!" Tim glared at his sister. "You brought them along? Kim, what were you thinking?!"
"They wouldn't stay home," Kim said in her own defense. "I told them to go back to the Sloth, but it looks like your girlfriends listen about as well as you guys do!"
Ron stepped up, his eyes glowing brighter by the second. "Time to go full monkey," he said. "Kim, get back!" But before Ron could call forth the full extent of the Mystical Monkey Power, a heavy length of steel nailed him upside the head. Ron hit the ground hard, and was deathly still.
"Ron!" Kim lunged at the gear head who had clubbed her husband. A flying kick to the stomach sent him flying into the other gear head, taking them both out of the game. Kim knelt down beside Ron. He was still breathing and had a pulse. He was unconscious, and he would probably have a nasty concussion, but he was still alive. Thank God for the MMP, she thought. Ron had been powered up just enough so that the hit didn't do nearly as much damage as it should have.
"Your skinny dude isn't gonna break anymore of my tools, Red. Seriously." Kim looked up and saw Ed's armor clad form lumbering up to her, his pulse lasers primed. "You two are worse than a thrown engine rod. Seriously. But after today, you'll be just another oil stain on my workshop floor."
"Uh, Kim," Jim stammered. "Any ideas?"
"Running for our lives seems like a pretty good idea," she replied. "But there is no way in hell I'm leaving Ron behind!"
"We're really sorry about this, Sis," Tim said.
"Yeah, well, I kinda figured if anyone would take me out one day, you two would be behind it somehow." Kim gave her brothers a wink. "Too bad it came sooner than later."
From their hiding place Stacy and Tracy saw the steel clad mechanic train his weapons on their boyfriends. "I think I'm about ten seconds away from completely freaking out," Stacy said.
"Five seconds here," Tracy agreed. "But we have to do something!"
Stacy saw something out of the corner of her eye. It was a rather sturdy looking table leg. "You know, we may not be teen crime fighters or super geniuses, but I think I know a way we can even the odds."
Tracy grinned at her twin and picked up another table leg. "Let's show this jerk what happens when he messes with the co-MVP's of the Middleton High varsity softball team." Tracy's eyes narrowed. "Batter up."
