Chapter Two: Backup Singer

In the days that followed The Kiss, Dave tried to think about anything other than Kurt Hummel. During class he focused on his work. He was smart, and even used to make straight A's, but concentration had grown increasingly difficult as he became angrier and angrier with himself and everyone else. In the hallways, he focused on his friends, successfully amusing them with stupid jokes and talk about sports. He avoided Kurt's locker and the hallway in front of the choir room.

Lunch was the hardest. There, his usual table put him directly in sight of Kurt and his group of friends. Watching Kurt's lips widen around his perfect white teeth in a smile, hearing his high voice as he joked with the girls—"Who's a diva now, Miss Mercedes?"—it made Dave's mouth ache. It also made him nervous. Had Kurt told anyone? Would Kurt tell anyone? He hoped the boy would be too afraid…and then hated himself for hoping such a thing.

At home, things were just as bad. He couldn't talk to his parents, and he couldn't bear the way their eyes followed him worriedly. He knew he was hurting and disappointing them, but when he tried to weigh that against how hurt and disappointed they'd be if they found out their only son was…

He couldn't even think it to himself. If he thought the words, it would be like coming out to himself. As long as he never thought about it, never acted on it, he could be straight and normal and he could be Dave Karofsky, hockey player, football player, top dog…big bully. He spent a lot of time in his room alone, trying to think about anything but Kurt Hummel and The Kiss. That kiss scared him more than anything he'd ever done. It was a step outside the box you absolutely couldn't leave if you wanted to be normal. In life, Karofsky knew all too well—at least in high school life—it didn't pay to be a soloist. The only way to avoid getting stepped on or left behind was to sing in perfect unison with everyone else, making sure your voice was just loud enough, but never so loud that it could be picked out from the rest of the singers.

Dave groaned and rolled over. Damn Kurt Hummel to the ninth circle of hell…he had Dave thinking in musical metaphors.