Now it's a Derek POV of the storage closet. Hopefully Derek's head is as easy to control as Meredith's. I was thinking of making each chapter relate to a different song, I dunno yet. What do you think? Alright well anyways I don't own Grey's or Jon McLaughlin. PS...if anyone out there has yet to see "Enchanted" do it now, Paddy sings this song

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You're in my arms

And all the world is gone

The music playing on

For only two

So close together

And when I'm with you

So close to feeling alive

I had just finished up a craniotomy and was heading to my office, I needed a time out. The guy had flat lined twice and despite my best efforts we lost him. It never gets any easier losing a patient. Just last week I lost a 17 year old kid on my table. Bus accident and he had a pencil sticking into his eye, and then when I pulled out the pencil an artery burst, causing his brain to swell. Danny's never going to find out that life gets better after high school. Like I said, it never gets any easier.

As I near the nurse's station I hear someone calling out my name.

"Hey Derek wait up!"

I turn and see Rose jogging to catch up to me. Rose, I mean I could learn to like the woman, but she's not the woman. I could never love a woman named after a flower, especially when I associate all things flowery with Meredith. I lean up against the nurse's station and give her my full attention. Hmm, I do tend to lean a lot, don't I?

"So, do you wanna get drinks at Joe's later?"

I nod slowly. Dating was what I was doing, because Meredith wasn't ready for me yet. "Sure I'd love to, meet me in the lobby at 8?"

"Okay, I'll uh..I guess I'll see you then. Bye Derek," she was blushing.

I chuckle a little because the shyness and the blushing remind me of the morning after I met Meredith.

"So, um, goodbye, um..."

"Derek."

"Derek, right Meredith."

"Meredith?"

"Yeah."

"Nice meeting you."

"Bye, Derek."

If only I had known then what I know now. I would have never attempted to repair my marriage with Addie and I would have told Mer sooner about my wife. Oh well, hindsight's 20/20, right? I continue the trek to my office and when I get there I see that Mark is sitting behind my desk.

"You do realize that it says Shepherd on the door and not Sloan, correct?"

"Meredith's looking for you, she came here twice," he says with a smirk.

I can't help but smirk right back. I guess she wants a date in the on call room again.

"Well she'll probably call me soo-" I feel my cell phone vibrate in my pocket and I look at the ID, Meredith.

Mark laughs heartily, "Gotta love the dirty mistress. She's always right on cue."

I shake my head at him and answer, "Mer?"

"Hi Derek."

"Storage closet on the second floor, give me five minutes," and I hang up without another word.

A life goes by

Romantic dreams must die

So I bid mine goodbye

And never knew

So close was waiting

Waiting here with you

And now, forever, I know

All that I want is to hold you

So close

As I exit my office all I can hear is Mark's laughter. I guess, in a way, it is funny. It's funny because it's such a cruel joke, but I keep going along with it because she's Meredith and I'm Derek. Of course, I'm so wrapped up in my thoughts as I board the elevator, that I don't notice the two other occupants. I feel eyes boring into me and I look up, Bailey and Cristina. God, what the hell did I do to deserve this? My prayer is short lived because I see Cristina reach out and pull the alarm. Shit I'm trapped in the elevator with the Nazi and Mer's person.

Cristina's the first to speak, "What the hell did you do to her McDreamy?" It isn't as much as a question as it is a demand.

"I didn't do anything. I'm dating."

Bailey rolls her eyes, "You so damn stupid Derek. When are you gonna realize that you're killing that poor girl?"

I put my weight on right foot and lean back, crossing my arms in the process.

"What do you mean? We agreed to the dating, she's not ready for anything else."

"When are you gonna realize that Grey is gonna need all the time she can? Derek you broke her, she drowned, lost two mothers, and her father and you expect her to be perfectly fine? She's trying, she's trying so damn hard."

Cristina nods and speaks up "Listen, you may not think that Mer's doing anything about her issues. That's fine. But Derek," she pulls the alarm again, "she's talking to me. We have psych books and she's opening up, so much."

Cristina is being somewhat civil today and as is Bailey, what the hell is going on in this hospital?! The elevator dings and the doors open to the second floor, my salvation. I walk out cautiously and give them a nod as the doors close. I seriously believe that that was somewhat planned.

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No one's in the assigned storage closet when I get there, thank God. I have only a few seconds of solace before the door opens and my senses are on overload as I smell the lavender. As soon as she shuts and locks the door I pounce her. She sighs and I take the advantage and drive my tongue into her mouth, tasting her. She relaxes in my arms, but then pulls back. Didn't she call me here for this? I know I can be brainless sometimes, but I had the assumption that this was a booty call.

"What's the matter?"

"We, uh, we need to talk Derek."

I watch her as she fidgets with her watch, God she's so sexy when she's nervous. But she said we needed to talk, so I reach out slowly and gently bring her chin up to look at me. I had to talk too.

"Mer, we do need to talk. I um, I have a date tonight. With Rose," I say slowly.

"You. Have a date. With Rose. Tonight. Okay that's fine, you're allowed to date. S&M allows for the dating and the uh, yeah dating--"

I chuckle lightly, I love her rambling.

"You said that we needed to talk? I got lost in that little ramble of yours."

"Idontwantyoutodateanyoneelse."

I had no idea what that sentence was supposed to formulate, "Slow down, what?"

"I don't want you to date anyone but me."

"Why? Why don't you want me dating? This is the arrangement Meredith. You aren't ready, so I'm dating."

I lace my fingers with hers, trying to make her understand.

"I am ready."

It was barely a whisper, but those three words are the one's I've been waiting so patiently for her to say. So they were crystal clear. A grin stretches across my face as I look at her.

"What? I'm ready Derek, isn't that what you want?!"

I reach out and grab both sides of her face and kiss her deeply, never wanting this moment to end. But she pulls back again and continues.

"I want it too, Derek. I love you. I know I don't say it often, but I do...love you that is. You say such perfect things and I'm not in the least bit eloquent. But I want to marry you too. When Burke left Cristina that scared me. She was the one person who understands me, well besides you, and she didn't get her happily ever after, so what made me deserve that happiness? I didn't want to see her unhappy, so I ran. I ran and I was stupid Derek. I asked for the S&M because I didn't want to lose you completely. You make me feel safe. You know, when we come back down to Earth after sex, and just lay there? The world stops when I'm in your arms Der. I couldn't give that up, so I just went with the S&M as much as I hated it. As much as I hated seeing you with Sydney and seeing you now with Rose, I sucked it up because in the end I would get you.

And even as scary as they sound, I want to have your babies. I could possibly enjoy pushing a bowling bowl out of my vagina. To see a baby with your perfect hair and the McDreamy face. Maybe not so much your nose, no offense," I smiled and took a breath before continuing. He chuckled lightly, his eyes urging me to keep going, maybe I wasn't fucking this up as badly as I thought I would.

I want you to build me and the mini McDreamies a beautiful house. I want our bedroom to face the water so we can see the sun rise and set every day, and see the mist come off the lake. I want to wake up with you each morning entangled in the sheets.

I am not living to 110 Derek. You are not dying in my arms. We'll die together in each other's arms, maybe at 108 cause 110 is just too freaking old. I'm done Derek. You are it for me, seriously. I can try to date or run in the opposite direction, but I can't not feel what I feel for you. I want a lifetime with you and just you. No more secrets, no more avoiding, no more running away Der, I'm done."

Oh my God. Oh my God. Was that Meredith even talking? Holy shit, she just...oh my God. I'm obviously speechless.

"Derek, please say something? I just...I just totally went out of body and channeled someone other than myself and are you alright? Do you need me to call a code?"

"I, uh, wow Mer. That was uh, wow."

Way to go Derek, you've picked up her rambling.

"Was it epic? Because I think it was and it seriously trumped your speech."

I smile and laugh, she speaks the truth.

"Yeah, yeah it definitely blew mine out of the water. Did you seriously say all that? No rambling?"

She nods, but it's like slow motion.

"You're in shock? Derek?"

"Huh? Oh, um, I guess I am. It's just I cannot believe it."

"You can't believe what?"

"You, communicating, ready. You're ready," by now I have a huge grin on my face.

"I'm rea-."

I don't even let her finish. I ravage her mouth, speaking volumes through the kiss.

So close to reaching

That famous happy end

Almost believing

This one's not pretend

Now you're beside me

And look how far we've come

So far

We are

So close...

As we're getting back into our scrubs after the real reason we were there, I can't help but have a permanent grin on my face. She just said so many perfect things to me, my heart feels as if it might explode.

"So what does this mean?"

Oh God I knew it was too good to be true, my face drops.

She shakes her head, "No Derek I'm not running. Just...what do we do now?"

"Oh thank God. We can do whatever you want Meredith, what do you want?"

She rolls her eyes as she puts her hands on her hips, she looks so fucking sexy like that.

"Derek! I just told you what I want, did I not?"

"Well I don't know where to start. I mean, God I need to get a ring and house plans, kids...oh shit..."

She giggles. I could listen to her giggle forever.

"Wow I really put a number on you, huh? I mean you sound like me right now. Der, we can have all of that, but we don't need to rush. A lifetime...remember? So calm down okay? You can plan a proper proposal with a ring, we can call up some architects, and in the mean time, we can practice the baby making," she says wiggling her eye brows.

I chuckle lightly and pull her towards me.

"God I love you. So a proper proposal, hmm? I guess I should start practicing my charming techniques in the mirror then. We can call someone tomorrow about the house. And later tonight, we'll practice making babies," I kiss her forehead and wrap my arms tightly around her.

I couldn't believe that this was really happening. My Meredith was finally ready to become my wife. To give me all of the things I've asked her to do. I was more than willing to plan the perfect way to propose, but to truly make it perfect, I would talk to her person. Well...maybe.

Oh, how could I face the faceless days

If I should lose you now?

We're so close to reaching

That famous happy end

Almost believing

This one's not pretend

Let's go on dreaming

Though we know we are

So close

So close, and still

So far...