A/N: Thanks so much to those who have left a review...I always love to know what you all think =)
Hearts get Harder
Chapter 2:
The next day Cuddy realized around seven in the evening that she had not heard from House all day. She tried to call her home to see if he could stay with Rachel after the nanny left so she could get some last-minute things done at the hospital, but he wasn't there. After calling the baby-sitter Cuddy headed upstairs to look for him. What she found was a dark office and a lone figure slumped in the corner chair under a small reading lamp. She pushed the door open and walked in.
"Hey—Chase?" Cuddy stopped in her tracks when she realized the figure in House's chair was in fact not House.
"Chase uncrossed his arms and pushed himself up into a sitting position. "Hey," he said.
"I was…looking for House. Did he already leave?"
"I haven't seen him today," Chase said. "I figured he stayed at your place."
Cuddy shook her head. "He left before I did this morning." Chase shrugged as if to say that he wasn't House's keeper and he didn't give a crap where he was or what he was doing. Cuddy stood at the door silently for several seconds before coming inside and closing it behind her. "I wanted to talk to you anyway," she said. "Are you still interested in getting back on the team permanently?"
"Yes," he said softly, but with a hint of uncertainty.
"Well, I talked to Foreman and we agreed that it would be great to have you back there. You'll be an attending physician and you'll be a mentor to the new round of fellows next year."
"Did you talk to House?" Chase asked, knowing the answer and knowing why she didn't mention it. She ignored the question and squinted into the barely lit room, catching sight of a small duffle bag on the floor at Chase's feet.
"What are you doing?" She asked him. "Are you sleeping here?"
"No," he said flatly. "I'm sleeping at a hotel. I just didn't want to leave yet."
Cuddy took a step closer and sat next to him on the ottoman as she had done with House so many times in the past. "What's going on?"
His lips turned down in a frustrated frown and his eyes glossed over. "I dunno," he said. "She hardly talks to me anymore and when I told her I wanted to stay she flipped." Cuddy reached a hand out to find his arm and squeezed. "I have no idea what happened. After the wedding we were so happy and then when we came back it was like everything fell apart." Absently Chase leaned in closer to Cuddy and pushed his hair away from his eyes.
"Have you two talked about leaving?" Cuddy asked with a certain amount of trepidation. The last thing she wanted was to lose either of them, but she knew that this place could be pretty intense especially now.
"Leave the hospital?" He asked her. "No. Of course not. We were happy here before; we can be again." He nodded as he spoke, as if trying to convince himself that what he was saying was true. "She always does this. When something is upsetting her she always shuts me out, and then comes running back later."
Cuddy nodded. "I know the feeling," she said honestly. The thought that House and Cameron had something in common when it came to the way they treated the people who loved them struck her as ironic. The stinging rejection of the night before came back to her in an instant and she knew Chase could see it.
His hand came down over where she was still gripping his arm and he laced his fingers with hers. They stared at each other as if waiting for an invitation. What an insane and wonderful feeling this was. A fantasy. A nightmare. He was shocked at how quickly he could go from spite to exhilaration in her presence. Chase closed his eyes briefly and when he opened them Cuddy had started to pull away.
Chase reached for her and tangled a hand through her thick curls. He brought her lips to his and parted them slightly as they met one another. His kiss was soft, but with enough urgency that Cuddy leaned into him and parted her lips, reaching out to hold his face in her hands as they let tongues loose and ragged breaths escape between bruised and busied lips.
Cuddy could barely react; she had been stunned into silence. After spending so many years longing for things she thought she couldn't have and then by some miracle she got them…would she risk destroying that now? For what? For who? But it wasn't exactly a dream come true with House was it? She thought. She remembered the gentle touch of Chase's fingers moving over her neck and shoulder.
He sensed her hesitation and pulled back slightly but didn't let go of her. "I'm sorry, I know this is nuts--" he started, but Cuddy stopped him by placing her thumb to his lips. He kissed it and then opened his eyes to look at her. Really look at her. The little bit of light that filtered from the windows and the small light behind him illuminated her just enough for him to see that though she was tired and worn from the day, her hair pinned in a perfect bun had started to fall around her face and her lips were swollen from his kisses, her eyes wild with equal parts arousal and confusion. He had always thought she was attractive and sexy. But in this moment she had never been more beautiful.
"You look amazing in this light," Chase told her, never one to keep his thoughts to himself. Cuddy smiled and looked away, a little embarrassed at what had just transpired.
"House used to say the same thing to me," she said, without realizing it. At the mention of his name both of them stiffened up and dropped their hands away from one another. Chase clutched his fists at his side and looked away when Cuddy stood up abruptly. "I'm gonna go," she said.
He nodded. "That's probably a good idea." The two lingered, staring and itching to say the hell with it, and see where the night could take them. But both were a bit too cautious and rational for that. "Goodnight Cuddy," Chase whispered, as she stepped away from him and pushed passed the door. He wasn't even sure if she'd heard him.
Cuddy never did find House that night, which she decided, was a good thing. When she got home she imagined that she could still feel a tingling sensation on her lips. She could still smell the soft musk he wore and the taste of him. What is wrong with me? She wondered. This was so not like her, and yet she couldn't stop the images from playing in her mind. Images of what happened and what might have happened. Could he have pulled her into his lap, could she have straddled him while the pulled off her shirt and let needy hands caress her breasts?
And it was Chase? So unlikely, so young. So sweet and uncomplicated. Cuddy shook her head; willing the thoughts to disappear. She tossed and turned for most of the night before her frustrations got the better of her. She let her hand roam over the soft cotton nightgown from her breasts to her stomach, down to the lace hem of her nightgown. She pushed her panties out of the way and sunk her two forefingers into the already wet and waiting center of her thighs. A raspy moan fell out of her lips as she stroked her sex in repetitive circles with building determination. She imagined Chase's firm smooth body above her, his boyish face looking down at her, his lips on her throat. She imagined that it was his hands manipulating her, driving her insane…
She opened her eyes briefly and swept across the room, double checking to make sure she was indeed alone. "Chase." His name dripped from her tongue in the way a too rich piece of chocolate does. Naughty, delicious and wrong. She said it again a little louder this time, "Chase." She sped up her rhythmic thrusting of her fingers against her clit and arched her back until her shoulders bore into the mattress and her free hand clutched the sheets as she rode her orgasm to its end.
tbc...
