Chapter One: Allegiance


A/N: So here's the first chapter! As stated, this takes place in the Season 3 timeline, so a bit over eighteen years after the prologue. Thank you to everyone who reviewed, favourited and followed this story so far.


Saskia pushed her long blonde hair from her face as she strode into the Queen's room. There was no point in knocking, she knew she was expected. She had been hunting all day and knew that if she did not tell her grandmother she had returned, the older woman would send men to find her. "Grandmother."

Nia glanced over her shoulder at her, putting down her glass of what Sas assumed was wine. "Saskia."

"You seem tense." Sas commented as she fiddled with her bow, running her fingers along the curved edge of the wood.

"Skaikru have invaded our territory." Nia informed her, walking over to her granddaughter to examine her. Sas watched her carefully as Nia played with a piece of her hair. She always was overly critical of her granddaughter.

"What? Why?" Sas frowned, she did not think that Skaikru would venture this far away from where they originally fell from the sky.

"I don't know, but I intend to find out." Nia told her as she sat down, gesturing for Sas to do the same.

Sas moved over to the seat, placing her bow on the table. "Was anyone harmed?"

"Yes. Several of our people were killed." Nia nodded, leaning back in her chair. Sas sometimes thought it was weird to see her in such a relaxed position, although the cold and stony look on her face never faded. Sas couldn't recall a time in her life where Nia had smiled a real smile, or had ever shown any pride in her granddaughter. "They will pay for this."

"What is your plan?" Sas tucked her hair behind her ear. It had been a long time since she had seen her grandmother genuinely this furious over something. She could understand why, but at the same time it frightened her.

"I haven't decided. Are you still looking for your father?" Nia turned her icy gaze away from her cup to her granddaughter, arching an eyebrow.

"Yes." Sas nodded. She had been looking for Roan ever since he had left without an explanation. Nia had told her that it was because he no longer cared for Azgeda, or her, and so he left. It was something she didn't want to believe, but after years of searching to no avail, she was beginning to believe it more and more.

"And you have not found him." Nia stated and Sas resisted the temptation to roll her eyes. Clearly if she had found him he would either be back here or she would be with him. "Haven't you thought perhaps he doesn't want to be found?"

"I'm still going to keep looking." Sas told her as she got to her feet. "I want to know why he left."

Nia leant back in her chair, sipping her wine. "You are to stay here until this business with the Skaikru is done."

"What? Why?" Sas glanced at her, picking her bow up and slinging it across her back. She didn't want to be confined to Azgeda, she enjoyed her freedom to roam outside the walls all too much.

"Because it is too dangerous." Nia's tone left no room for argument, and Sas knew that it would be stupid to try. Once her grandmother had made up her mind about something, there was no arguing around it no matter how hard you tried.

Sas sighed heavily, raking a hand through her hair. "Can I at least join you?"

Nia considered it for a moment before nodding. "Very well."

"Thank you."


Nadine had not been pleased to discover that Roan of Azgeda had arrived at Polis with Skaikru fugitive Clarke Griffin. It had been a long time since she had seen her former lover – over eighteen years, to be precise. When she'd initially returned to her people, she had been hopeful that one day, Roan would come back to her. Perhaps he'd even bring their daughter, who Nadine had never got the chance to name. But as the years passed, it became very clear that Roan had forgotten about her. She was the mother of his child, nothing more.

After the death of her mother Petra, Nadine had gone on to serve her successor in the guard, and then that Commander's successor – Commander Lexa. The girl had promise, and was a similar age to Nadine's own daughter. Yet she couldn't take on a maternal role towards her own leader, so she served as part of Lexa's guard. When the announcement of Roan's arrival had come, she'd needed a walk around the skyscraper to cool off.

She had tried to find love after Roan, she really had. In her early twenties, there had been a man she had nearly married – a member of her own clan, Zander. Yet she hadn't loved him the way she had loved Roan. She cursed the Prince of Azgeda's existence, wishing she could forget him the way he had forgotten her. She hated the fact that she had hurt Zander in rejecting him, and their friendship hadn't been the same since. There had been another, a lover, but he could never have been hers. They should not have even been together that way.

Then she turned the corner and noticed him. He was more broad-shouldered now than when they'd been teenagers, but not a lot else about him had changed – save the fact he had more scars. Horrified and hoping she could get away without being noticed, or that he'd ignore her or not recognise her, Nadine swung around and turned back the way she had come.

"Nadine?"

She cursed under her breath and glanced over her shoulder. "Your Highness."

"You look good," Roan remarked, causing her to raise her eyebrows. Nadine was not an arrogant woman, but she knew she was what some men would consider attractive – long golden blonde hair, sky blue eyes and a curvaceous figure. She was often told she looked younger than her thirty-four years. Nonetheless, she didn't appreciate the compliment coming from Roan.

"Eighteen years and it's 'you look good'," she said dryly.

Roan shrugged. "Well, you do."

"I heard you were banished." Nadine tossed her hair back, a slight smirk crossing her lips. In order for the Ice Nation to join Lexa's Coalition, Nia had had to banish Roan. Not that Nadine thought the Queen had really cared.

"I was. It's rather unfortunate."

"I imagine so, poor Roan." Her voice grew mocking, and she knew that she was overstepping her place, but she still held some power here in Polis – after all, her mother had been the former Commander. "No servants out in the wild."

His eyes narrowed slightly. "I'm doing just fine."

"A miracle."

"How have you been?" Roan asked, deliberately directing the conversation away from himself.

"Oh you mean since you forcibly dragged me from Azgeda?" Nadine's voice was cold. "Quite well."

"I didn't have a choice." Roan had the grace to at least look apologetic. "My mother would have killed you."

Nadine didn't want to believe that he was sorry. He hadn't communicated with her in almost twenty years. If he was really sorry, he would have found a way to let her see her child. Her anger reached boiling point and she clenched her hands into fists to save her doing something she might regret.

"I never even got to see my child."

"She is alive and well," Roan assured her. "You'll see her one day."

Nadine's temper snapped and she slapped him across the face. In the moment it felt good, but after she realised that hitting the Crown Prince of Azgeda probably wasn't the smartest idea. He blinked in surprise, reaching up to rub his jaw.

"What was that for?"

"Any numbers of reasons," Nadine snapped. He couldn't just come to Polis and act like nothing had changed between them.

"Ah." Roan smiled ruefully. "Well, perhaps Saskia will join my mother when she comes to Polis."

"You're a bastard," Nadine hissed. Insults couldn't convey the anger she felt for this man. She hated him. He had torn her away from her child, and even if he was right in saying Nia had wanted her dead, it didn't explain why she'd never been able to see or communicate with her daughter.

"I didn't have a choice, Nadine," he protested.

"I didn't even get to hold her before you took me away from her." She clenched her jaw. Perhaps he had loved her, but then why hadn't he tried to communicate with her since? She didn't think she could trust Roan. She wasn't the wide-eyed teenage girl who'd become his lover in Azgeda. She'd become more cynical since then.

"We didn't have time." Roan shook his head slowly. "I had to save you."

Nadine glowered. "Why did that matter?"

"I cared about you." The words were quiet, and seemed strange coming from such a man, yet Nadine couldn't deny that they were true. Maybe he had cared about her once, but he had chosen his allegiance – to Azgeda, not to her.

"That was a long time ago now," she reminded him, before spinning around and walking off. She didn't want to be around Roan. He brought up feelings and memories that she would rather forget, so she decided to actively avoid him while he was in Polis.


Saskia let out a grunt as Ontari slammed her into the ground yet again. As much as she tried she was never going to be as good a fighter as the other girl. Sas was faster, but Ontari was stronger than her, but it didn't matter how hard she fought, the other girl always seemed to win. Sas moved out of the way of a kick aimed for her stomach, picking up her discarded spear and slamming it into Ontari's chest, throwing her off balance. Sas used the opening to flip to her feet, kicking Ontari in the face before the other girl knocked her feet from under her yet again.

Sas let out a growl as she pushed herself from the ground, launching herself at Ontari and hooking her around the waist, the two of them going sprawling to the ground. Sas managed to get on top of her for a moment before she was flipped. Ontari reeled back slightly as Sas head butted her, but it wasn't enough to throw her off balance. Sas scratched at her wrists as Ontari wrapped her fingers around her neck, quickly cutting off the air supply.

"Well done, Ontari." Nia praised her, watching as both of the girls got to their feet, with Sas rubbing at her neck which she was sure would bruise. Sas grabbed her spear from the ground, clenching her jaw. Nia turned her gaze to her granddaughter, her mouth set in a hard line. "Next time, I'm hoping you can do better, Saskia."

Saskia couldn't help but feel her anger flare up. Nia had always put Ontari above her, despite her being Nia's own flesh and blood. "Perhaps if my teacher was better, I could do better."

"Or perhaps your weakness stems from your mother." Nia retorted, not in the mood for her granddaughter's sass.

"I wouldn't know." Sas shrugged her shoulders, walking over to the weapons rack and placing her spear down.

Nia followed after her, clearly not done with the conversation. "Fortunately, I would."

Saskia turned to face her, arching an eyebrow. "Why do you hate her so much?"

"Your mother was a selfish whore. She was sixteen when she had you and decided she didn't want you." Nia snapped, crossing her arms when she saw Saskia's jaw clench, as if she was holding something back. "Is there something you want to say?"

"Yes, but you will not listen." Sas told her, knowing that she never really listened to what she said to her. She didn't feel that her mother had just abandoned her, but she knew it wasn't worth the argument that they had had many times happening again.

Nia raised her eyebrows, curious as to what Saskia had to say to her. "Try me."

Saskia thought on it a moment before shaking her head and heading back towards her room. She wasn't in the mood for Nia's games. She wanted nothing more than to sleep after her day of hellish training. "I'm going to go and wash."

"Very well." Nia sighed heavily, watching as Saskia walked off, wishing that the young woman would be less like her parents at times.


"That insufferable man is here in Polis," Nadine snapped as she stormed into the house she shared with her father, Klaus. He was so different from her mother – gentle and soft-spoken, prone to negotiation rather than conflict. Most of these were not traits that Nadine had inherited.

"Which one?" Klaus inquired, raising his eyebrows. He had been the one to console her in the rough few weeks after her daughter's birth and return to Polis. She had cried and wanted to leave, wanted to take desperate action to get to her baby. But each time Klaus had held her and stroked her hair, assuring her that her daughter was safe – Nadine just couldn't get to her. It had been a difficult time, especially considering there had been some controversy regarding the Commander's daughter having a child with the Prince of the Ice Nation at such a young age.

"Roan."

"Ah." A wry smile crossed Klaus's lips. "That one."

"He tried to act innocent about taking me away from our daughter." Nadine sat down, folding her arms over her chest. "He just said Nia wanted to kill me, which I already knew. All I know is that he took me away from my child."

"Nia did influence that," Klaus pointed out, the voice of reason as always. "But he should have let you see the child."

Nadine felt justified in her indignation now that her dad agreed with her on something. Despite the fact that Roan claimed his actions were to protect her, it didn't explain why Nadine hadn't been allowed to visit her daughter or have any contact since. She felt hurt and betrayed, a feeling that wasn't likely to go away unless Roan had a very good explanation for his actions. It was possible Nia had prevented it, but did he always have to listen to his mother?

"He said I look good. Can you believe that?"

"Relax, Nads," Klaus insisted, handing her a steaming cup of tea. Despite their differences, the two had had a close relationship since Petra's death. It had been clear to Nadine that he had loved her mother, the longest-serving Commander, very much. "You should rest. Lexa has kept you busy lately."

"I'm fine." Nadine leaned back in her chair. "The Azgeda delegation arrives tomorrow morning, and I'm interested to see them."

Klaus frowned. "Why is that?"

"So I can spit at Nia," she responded with some ferocity. She knew that one day, her temper would get the better of her, but she loathed Nia. This was the woman who had deprived her of a relationship with her child, who had tried to have her killed simply because she didn't approve of her relationship with Roan.

"Be careful," Klaus chided.


Saskia was unsure about how she felt about Polis, all she knew was that she definitely didn't like it as much as she thought she would. There were too many people to her liking, and she didn't enjoy the stares she was getting from some of them. She had made the decision to stay well away from Nia for the duration for the trip, enjoying the break from her scrutinizing gaze and harsh words. No matter what you did, it was never going to be enough in Nia's eyes.

She sighed heavily as she sat down on one of the small stone walls, crossing her legs. She always loved to observe people, she found them to be rather fascinating, and she liked observing people's habits. She continued to look around Polis, though she found it unappealing in comparison to Azgeda, as she missed the snow. She found the white substance to be a beautiful blanket on the surrounding landscape, despite how cold it was.

A small frown tugged at her lips as she recognised one of the outsiders wandering through the main part of the city. She would recognise his face and the scars anywhere, he was the one person she had been looking for after all. She launched herself off of the wall, bolting over to him and wrapping her arms around him. She wasn't usually one to show affection, but it had been years since she had seen her father and she had missed him greatly.

Roan pulled back from his daughter after a few moments, resting his hands on her shoulders. "I found someone here you might be interested in meeting."

Saskia raised an eyebrow at the comment. Had he randomly found some woman he wanted her to meet? "Who?"

"Your mum." He answered, keeping an arm around her shoulders as they began to walk. He felt her shoulders sink slightly, frowning down at her. "You're not pleased."

"She abandoned me." She murmured, not really wanting to discuss her mother.

Roan sighed heavily. He knew his mother had spun lies, but he hadn't realised just how much his daughter had believed them. "That's not the truth."

"Then what is the truth?" Sas looked up at him, her blue eyes reminding him a lot of Nadine's. She had definitely gained her beauty from her mother.

"Nia was going to have your mum killed." He explained to her, pulling her over to the side of the path so they could talk without disrupting anyone.

"What? Why? Why did you not tell me sooner?" She demanded, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Because your grandmother didn't want you running off trying to find her." He reasoned with her, raking a hand through his hair. "I had to take her away from Azgeda as soon as she had you."

"Why did you leave?" It was a question both of them knew was coming, and she was very demanding in her tone, reminding her father of his mother.

"I was banished." He replied, resting his hand against her shoulder and looking her over. "Are you alright?"

Sas nodded, leaning up to kiss his cheek. "I'm fine."

Roan smiled slightly before kissing the top of her head. He was glad to see her safe. "Good."


The streets of Polis were buzzing with anticipation and gossip. Nadine didn't usually listen, but this time it was about Queen Nia. Apparently, she had been responsible for the destruction at Mount Weather – and while Nadine couldn't see she was sorry to see the horrific place go, it had been a declaration of war against the Sky People. She was so deep in thought, wondering what Lexa might do to Nia to punish her, that a blonde girl collided with her, making her step back.

"Sorry," the girl said.

"It's alright." Nadine examined her thoughtfully. She looked familiar, although she couldn't have said why. She was a pretty girl, with light blonde hair and bright blue eyes, no older than her late teens. "What was your name?"

"Saskia," she responded, making Nadine feel a mixture of excitement and terror. This girl…it couldn't be a coincidence. This had to be her, but it didn't seem real to Nadine. After so many years of not knowing her child, it was hard to believe that this young woman right in front of her was her little girl. "And you are?"

"Nadine. You look familiar. Ice Nation?"

"Yes." Saskia nodded, examining Nadine curiously in turn. Did she perhaps suspect the truth? How much did she know? "Nia is my grandmother."

"You're Roan's daughter," Nadine stated, and her stomach clenched at the realisation that this girl really was her child. She felt overwhelmed by emotion, but struggled not to let it show. Saskia wouldn't take kindly to a stranger hugging her in the streets. When the girl nodded, she swallowed her. "Then I'm your mother."

Saskia frowned. "Excuse me?"

"Well, to my knowledge, Roan only has one child and you'd be around eighteen, yes?"

The girl bit her lip. "Yes."

Nadine couldn't help but smile proudly. This was the baby she'd been forced to abandon in Azgeda, and the years that had passed had turned her daughter – Saskia – into a lovely young woman.

"Look how beautiful you are."

"Well, I know where I get the beauty from." Saskia grinned. "Definitely not Dad."

"Your dad is not an unattractive man." Nadine couldn't help but laugh, but her amusement died when she wondered what exactly Saskia knew about her. "Your grandmother probably told you that I left you."

"She did." Saskia nodded slowly. "Dad left too."

"Well, I can't speak for your dad, but leaving you wasn't my choice." Nadine didn't know how much the girl would believe, especially considering they were practically strangers. But Saskia was entitled to the truth, whether she'd listen or not. "I left because your grandmother wanted to kill me."

Saskia looked troubled. "Oh."

"I was fifteen when I got pregnant, sixteen when I had you." Nadine raked a hand through her hair. "She thought Roan and I were far too young, and she didn't approve of me. She didn't want me as a future Queen of Azgeda."

"So you ran," Saskia remarked.

"Your dad made me." She realised her story was probably scaring the girl, and forced a smile. "You don't have to believe what I say. I know I'm a stranger to you."

"I'd like to get to know you," Saskia said, which pleasantly surprised Nadine. She wouldn't have blamed the girl if she hadn't wanted anything to do with her for the time being. It couldn't be easy to meet your mum in the streets of Polis, especially when Saskia had been told that Nadine had willingly left her.

"I'd like that too," Nadine murmured.


When the Azgeda delegation arrived, Nadine knew her place was in the throne room by Lexa's side. She didn't trust Nia, especially not around the Commander. As if her cruelty to Nadine wasn't enough, she had also had Lexa's lover murdered. She hoped that even if Saskia didn't know right now, she would come to understand what a cold woman her grandmother was. When she entered, she wanted to be composed, but her blood boiled at the sight of Roan's mother.

"You're still alive." Her piercing eyes roved over Nadine, lips curling in contempt. She had to say that she was thrilled Nia had come to Polis in chains, responsible for the destruction of Mount Weather.

"Sadly for you, yes," Nadine retorted.

"I heard you finally met your daughter." Nia smirked, and Nadine was unable to control her anger. Hearing the Queen mention her child, the child she had taken from Nadine, made her charge towards her. Someone grabbed her by the arms and held her back as she struggled, hating Nia's mocking laughter. She glanced over her shoulder to see that it was Roan who had subdued her.

"Let me go," she demanded.

"I don't think that would be smart," Roan replied. She scowled and kept trying to tug free, but he was much stronger than her. She had heard the conversation from outside the doors – Nia challenging Lexa, volunteering Roan as her champion.

"You're going to fight for her?" she asked him. "Why?"

"Because he is my son," Nia said proudly, lifting her chin.

"You tried to have me killed," Nadine seethed, turning her attention back on the Queen. Lexa was sitting on the throne with a disapproving frown on her face at the heated exchange, but as of yet had made no move to say anything.

"For good reason," Nia said coolly.

"Good reason?" Nadine's eyes narrowed. "My only crime in your eyes was the fact that I bore your son's child. I was little more than a child myself, and you decided you wanted me dead just because you didn't approve of us."

"I see." The Queen's stern gaze turned to the Commander. "You certainly have your favourites. I wonder, if she was not Petra's daughter, would you allow her to speak and act in such a manner?"

"Enough." Lexa waved a hand for silence. "Roan, release her."

Nadine felt him let her go. As much as she wanted to storm from the room, stinging over Nia's actions and the fact that Roan was clearly his mother's son, her duty was to her Commander. Ignoring them, she stepped up to her place beside Lexa's throne. Saskia was old enough to make her own choices now. If she wanted to get to know Nadine, nothing Nia or Roan did could stop her.