I stop before my door. I really haven't talked to Joey in a week. I've been feeling bad about it, I think half way through the week I stayed at Monica's because I was a little ashamed to face him again. Now, he's sick. Which isn't any better because I'm gonna have to take care of him. I always feel responsible to offer to help when someone is sick around me, but at the same time it grosses me out. And on top of all of that, I have to apologize.

I walk in. I see all the cough medicine on the counter Monica was talking about. I go to my room and put all my stuff down. I slowly creep over to Joey's closed door. I take a deep breath and then knock lightly. No answer.

I open the door and whisper his name.

"Joey?"

But he's passed out in his bed. I go back out and get some gloves I use to clean the bathroom and go back to his room to clean up a bunch of tissues he has strewn all over his floor and nightstand. I feel like I owe it to him to help him when he needs someone. I really had no right disowning him for something I'm used to. I guess it's just that awkward thing you wish never had to happen, but does.

I'm finally finished when I hear Joey start to shift in his bed, he opens his eyes and sees me.

"Rachel?" His voice is so raspy and congested. It instantly makes me sad, he sounds so weak and defenseless.

"Sorry," I suddenly blurt out. Not for being here or possibly waking him up, but for everything I did. I don't know if he reads it that way.

"I…I'm glad you're back." He tells me and I'm speechless. It's like he's forgiven me this whole time and I can't see why he would do that.

He looks down at the garbage I'm holding. He lifts up his body and starts reaching down to take it from me.

"You don't have to do that-" he starts. I hold the pal away from his reach.

"No, I do. You're not well," I say. I put it down far on my side and then put my hand on his forehead. It's a bit warm, like he had a fever that has slowly been going down.

"Now rest okay," I still speak softly and gently lean over to kiss him. I get his temple and a bit of his hair, trying to avoid his mouth and breath. He just lets his body fall back down and is probably fast asleep by the time I'm closing his door again.


Taking care of Joey is surprisingly not gross. I realize now that I've never actually taken care of someone when they're sick. I was always too disgusted to even offer, but now that I actually am I feel…important. Like I'm really making a difference and doing a lot for someone out of the kindness of my heart, which I am. I'm even starting to like it, I like to feel needed. It makes me think for a second, I might make a good mother someday and that delights me very much.

So over the next few days I take pride in taking care of Joey and very oddly enough, I start to get disappointed when I see him getting much better. Obviously, I'm glad he's getting healthy again, but I did enjoy taking care of someone and being needed like that. I wouldn't serve someone on a normal basis because they would take advantage of it. When Joey was sick, he was like a little boy I got to bring juice and tissues to, put a movie on for, supply a blanket, and them send him back to bed when it was over and he was already falling asleep in the lounge chair. He always listened to me because I was right everytime anyway. I knew when he needed to eat, even when he didn't want to and when he needed to sleep or take more medicine. I made sure he got better.


Joey was now basically better. He was off the medicine, with the exception on some Tylenol every so often and his nose was cleared and his cough practically gone. He has no fever what so ever. Now, he was only sleepy still, but other than that he would be good as new soon enough. I decided I really need to appreciate this day or two left that I have. So, I skipped work today. Other days I would come home at lunch time and leave work early to check on him, but I never skipped.

Joey slept in and when he finally woke up, he was shocked to see me.

"Rachel, what are you doing here, it's Monday?"

"I just thought I would stay home for a day to really make sure you were better."

"Rachel you really don't have to," he says and then a second later sneezes. I run over with a tissue.

"See, you could go through a relapse," I half joke. He gives me a confused smile and then take the tissue from me.

We basically do all the same things this day, lounge around, watch a movie, eat, have some ice cream tonight, and then I send him to bed. He's asking me why I have come into his room as he's getting into bed.

"I've done this every other night. I'm making sure you're okay."

"But I am okay, I'm a lot better," he tells me.

"Well, I just like to. This will probably be one of the last times I will anyway, so why not."

He shrugs and pulls the covers over him and rests his head down on his pillow.

"Comfortable?" I ask and he nods at me. His eyes are already closing, but I kneel down beside his bed and push his hair away from his face. I feel his head one more time to make sure his fever hasn't returned, it hasn't. Then I go in to give him his goodnight kiss. I lightly kiss him in the same spot I always do, but this time when I'm done I sit back and continue to look at him. I really am going to miss this, I think to myself. I don't really know why I'm so fond of taking care of Joey, but it was comforting to me, maybe that I can take care of someone. That's definitely something I've never done before.

I decide to lean in and kiss him gently again, but this time on the cheek. His skin is soft, very soft. He just took a shower this morning, but everything feels so fresh and smooth. I kiss him again, I don't know why; I like the feel of it. He hasn't moved, I think he's already asleep. So I kiss him one more time, but before my lips meet his cheek, they subconsciously move to his neck. For some reason my lips are on his neck and I'm lingering and not letting them go. As I slowly start to release he is ever so slightly starting to wake up from my kiss.

I run out the door before I see his eyes open.