A/N: REVIEW FOR IT FEEDS MY ETERNAL ENGINE OF CREATION!

HOLY CRAP I WASN'T EXPECTING THIS MUCH SUPPORT!

0_0

Also, let's clarify something.

Naruto's view on the world is...warped.

He also bought ALL the slaves at that auction. Including Camie. He then turned right around and said they're free. The reason we didn't see the Strawhats in the last chapter was because they-like the rest of the crowd-were literally STUNNED into silence. After all, its not every day you see someone throw that kind of money around. Of course, that'd piss the World Nobles off. Saint-ugh!-Charloss in particular. Can you believe that bastard wanted to buy Camie just to see her eaten by his piranha?

Yup, he did.

I've even read the latest manga chapter and...well...

...Charloss ain't living past this. And Mjosgard! Yes, yes, YES! I knew he'd reform! I'm so happy to see this! Unfortunately, my anger at Lucci has been reignited. We all thought that fucker reformed but noooooo he's even worse than before and TWICE as much as a dick. Sorry, sorry, the latest chapter has my really riled up.

Furthermore, Naruto deliberately released the slaves in front of everyone to make a statement.

Now, some of you have asked: Neon, won't they just be captured again? Let's just say Naruto isn't alone in his endeavors. Namely, he has some allies of his own. Powerful allies, some poached from the crews of other pirates at that. Its his "Talk no jutsu" at its finest, I'd say. This chapter addresses that. Its also HEAVILY implied that Naruto's a fan of the Strawhats for their role in dismantling Crocodile's operation. Now he's not quite at Bartolomeo levels of fandom, but he's up there. This chapter ought to reflect that. In conclusion, the chapter titles are a stab at Game of Thrones. I thought it fit the theme here, all things considered:

For example, it would be:

And Who Are you,

The Proud Lord Said,

That I Must Bow So Low,

Only a Cat of a Different Coat...

...etc, so on and so forth. Hope you like it!

If not, I suppose I can always change the titles...

Also, the Smaug quote belongs to Smaug, but of course.

I swear, Benedict Cumberbatch fucking NAILED it as that damn dragon! There's also a little tongue twister early on =D Oh, and the following quote is a creed I can easily seen An Unruly Dragon living by. Also, a few minor changes and a small timeskip-we're talking a few minutes here-leading to Luffy and Zoro crashing in, meaning all the Strawhats are present at the time of Naruto's little stun...

..and the hilarity that follows.

"If someone asks us for help, we mustn't turn the other cheek.

We must be there whenever a hand reaches out for aid.

We must be there when an innocent child cries.

We must be there when we are needed.

We must be nobles worthy of name.

We must be better than this...

...because we are dragons!"

~?

And Who Are You?

A dragon is not a god.

No matter how much one might wish it to be so, it is not invincible.

A true dragon-an actual living incarnation of destruction-is mighty to be sure; their scales are ten-fold shields; their teeth are like swords; their claws spears; the shock of their tail - a thunder bolt; their wings - a hurricane; and their breath - death. But a dragon is not invincible. Its wings can be bound. It can fall to the ground. It can bleed. It can die. One might believe otherwise; to think a creature of such inimitable power is unassailable in its place at the peak. That nothing can ever shake it from its summit. But believing in something doesn't make it real.

We are not gods.

We are human, mortal.

I learned that when my mother died.

Mjosgard's...experience only served to solidify my beliefs.

No matter how much we might wish to convince ourselves otherwise, we are not infallible. We make mistakes-many in their case!-yet rather than admit or atone for them, we swaddle ourselves in privilege and power until that's all we know. Just as I did. I believed the lie for the longest time until my eyes were opened. That cruel shock made me realize the truth; we aren't what they claim we are. I saw what they thought of us that day. To the common people, we're little more than bullies; monsters wrapped in robes, girded by arrogance. We cannot afford to be mediocre savages whiling away our gifts.

We cannot kidnap and steal and pillage and plunder to our hearts content.

We cannot rampage about as we please, regardless of consequence.

To do so would bring the world to ruin.

The sea opened my eyes to that; my travels, moreso. You cannot make a friend of a slave; for a slave will fear the whip and react accordingly. But a friend...someone you've bonded with, fought beside through thick and thin...a friend will stand by your side until the very end. I learned early on that it was better to have a single friend than it was to possess a thousand slaves. Money cannot buy friendship, no matter how much a Tenryubito might argue that it does. A true friend will stand beside you always. In my journey abroad I made many of them and...well...that's a story for another time.

Once more, with great power comes greater responsibility.

In that sense, the responsibility of World Noble is the greatest of all.

We must be better than this; than our ancestors; we must be better than ourselves...


(...Scene Break...)


Nami wasn't sure if she wanted to laugh or cry.

Frankly, the navigator no longer knew if she was capable of either after enduring this kind of stress. Her nerves were frayed to the point of snapping altogether after the last few minutes; Camie's kidnapping, the auction, Luffy and Zoro's boisterous entry through the roof, and the conclusion that followed. One event after the other, a series of cascading coincidences compounding in fatal fractures that threatened to drive her utterly, hopelessly mad.

Could this day get any worse?

"This is ridiculous," she laughed/moaned into her hands. "Absolutely ridiculous...

Even now her knees buckled; she felt rather than saw herself collapse, crumpling to the floor as her legs folded beneath her. Not with grief, but relief. They'd been more than prepared to use their own two hundred million berries to secure Camie's safe return, only to have those hopes dashed as a Celestial Dragon-a freaking Tenryubito in the flesh!-bid a whopping five hundred million, a number no sane human had any hope of beating. Forget challenging the asshole, they simply didn't have that needed to compete with him...

...until someone swooped in and upstaged him with sadistic glee.

One hundred billion berries.

What manner of madness was this?!

Who had that kind of money to throw around?!

It was such an absurd amount that she nearly rejected it out of hand; but the auctioneer certainly hadn't. He'd gleefully accepted the newcomers coin and with said Noble's cheery declaration, the tension had drained right of the room, evaporating like so much steam. Even now the slave he'd just freed-Pascia, if she recalled correctly-tucked her head behind the blond's shoulders as he walked, seeking safety in his presence lest the room erupt into chaos or the like. Somewhere in the back of her mind, Nami almost pitied him.

Despite his earlier admission, the dancer seemed quite taken with his selfless display.

Well, good for her, but this didn't make any sense!

From what she'd seen and heard, she'd expected all Celestial Dragons to be little better than that Charloss creep; depraved pigs who thought they could get away with whatever they pleased, all under the guise of diplomatic immunity. To find one who'd blatantly buy up an entire auction house worth of slaves only to set them free...

...needlessly to say she was having trouble adjusting to that.

Least of all that said dragon was currently stomping towards them with a certain mermaid in his arms.

Nami nearly bolted towards the poor girl, such as her fright.

'Camie!'

The rest of the crew were of a similar mind:

"Nyu! Camie?!"

"Camie-chwan?!"

"Owh! What the hell?!"

"Yiiiii! Stay away! Stay away!"

"Gah! Why's he coming over here with her?!"

"Pardon me," the young man sketched a bow-as much as one could when holding a startled merfolk in their arms-towards their motley little crew, "But might you be the Strawhats...?"

Nami hissed softly.

'Don't speak, don't speak, whatever you idiots do, don't-

"Yup," Luffy replied thoughtlessly, shattering the tension with an easy grin. "That'd be us."

"LUFFY!"

"What? He asked so-ack?!"

Sanji promptly concassed the rubberman into the floor.

"Just ignore him." he feigned a smile. "We get that sort of thing a lot."

To his dismay, the Celestial Dragon didn't buy his remark.

Rather he took it upon himself to lean forward.

"No, I'm sure you're the Strawhats...

Usopp quivered.

"I'm having a serious case of I-can't-be-near-this-person-disease...

"Aha!"

The Unruly Dragon seized upon that whimper like a starving beast and leaned forward, momentarily forgetting his charge. Placid blue eyes rounded on the Strawhat sniper, dancing with just a hint of warmth. Judging by the way the long-nosed warrior shrieked and bolted behind Franky, he compared that calm expression to that of a rampaging dragon. All told, the blond certainly did exude a sense of...presence. If she had to lend it words, she might even call it pressure. As though his body simply radiated heat. Even then she didn't expect the response that followed.

"I knew it! You must be Sogeking! The one who burned the flag of the World Government! I'd recognize that nose anywhere."

Another awkward bow followed forthwith. "I must confess, I'm a bit of a fan."

Usopp's expression turned apoplectic, his tan expression ashen.

"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAH! HE KNOWS ABOUT SOGEKING?!"

Much to Nami's chagrin, the World Noble chuckled.

"Hmm? Of course I know about all about you! I'd love to have that kind of freedom." he smile grew imperceptibly. "Don't believe me?" Defiant of the sniper's disbelief, the whiskered warrior began to hum a soft tune beneath his breath. "On the island of snipers I was-

"HE KNOWS THE SONG TOO?! HOW?!"

"That's a secret!"

Pivoting on one heel-and seemingly heedless of the heart attack he'd just given their poor sharpshooter-the enigmatic blond turned to face her, seemingly uncaring as Chopper bustled past to treat the spasming sniper. For her part, Nami immediately braced herself, wary of those pleasant blue eyes and the secrets lurking within. With every word he'd spoken thus far, he had threatened to upturn her poisonous view of the World Government. Now she found herself face to face with the very symbol of authority she so loathed and despised...

...oddly enough, she was reminded of a puppy, eager to please.

Had he a tail, she suspected it would've been wagging.

"Nami, right? I heard you bid two hundred million earlier for the little miss earlier. I can reimburse you for that if you like."

"Huh?" she blinked, momentarily taken aback by his statement. "But I didn't spend it-

"Call it a contribution on my part, then." the blond beamed.

A beat of painful silence passed between them.

"N-No, that's alright...

"NAMI TURNED DOWN TREASURE!"

"A STORM IS COMIIIIIIING!"

Whilst Chopper, Luffy, and a now-revived Usopp continued to shriek like madmen in the background, Brook tilted his skeletal head aside, regarding the seemingly unruly dragon with inquisitive eyes. For all his eccentricity and grand gestures, the newcomer seemed sincere in his gestures, but who knew? If pirates could be deceptive, than surely anyone in the service of the World Government must be thrice so. Especially someone wielding the title of a World Noble. Still, there was one burning question on his mind that refused to abate, no matter how much he might wish it otherwise...

"Pray tell, just who is Sogeking?"

...ha?"

Just like that, the Celestial Dragon's attention shifted to regard their newest member with laser focus.

"And who are you? I don't believe there was a poster of you...

Such manners!

"My name is Brook!" Chuffed by such behavior, the skeleton tittered softly and sketched a bow of his own. "Dead Bones, Brook! As you can see! Although I have no eyes to see with! Yohohoho!" Despite the tension, he found himself unable to resist the pun and shrieked a laugh. "Skull jooooooooooooke!"

A brow rose?

"S-Skull...joke?"

Naruto snorted quietly.

A hand slapped up, covering his mouth.

Quite suddenly, something reminded him of Camie.

"Right, I'm being rude! Here you go, Cook-san! Take her, with my gratitude!"

"Eh?!" the greenette stiffened in is arms. "Wait a sec!"

"Mellorine~!"

With an unceremonious grunt the blond spun and launched the recently-freed mermaid towards a startled Sanji; his fellow blond jolted in surprise at the sudden maneuver and only narrowly managed to catch her in time. To his credit, he lasted at least three seconds without swooning. A heartbeat later, his entire being seemed to dissolve into a gooey puddle. Honestly, Nami considered it something of a miracle he held onto her at all. Still...with this they might be able to escape without-

"Oho!"

...it was not to be.

Luffy's eyes were practically sparkling by now. "So you're a nice guy, huh?! Thanks for giving Camie back!"

"Of course! But I really wanted to talk with Nico Robin. That's...kinda the reason I'm here."

The archaelogist arched a delicate brow.

"With me? Whatever for?"

"Yeah, you see, I wanted to ask you-

A sudden commotion from one of the lower seats interjected.

"I WILL NOOOOOOOOOOT ACCEPT THIS!" Charloss's nasally voice erupted into a petulant whine. "Capture those slaves! Capture them at once!"

Naruto growled.

"You take one step out of your seat little brother, and I'll beat you within an inch of your life!"

"No! I've have enough of your nonsense, you piece of trash-

"Shut up! You're annoying!"

CRUNCH.

Before anyone could think to stop him, Luffy's arm snapped forward in a bolt of motion. As everyone looked on in horror, the blow connected. Like an arrow launched from a bow, his elongated limb flew straight and true, colliding headlong with Charloss's unprotected visage. The result was nothing short of spectacular. Momentum seized the unprepared dragon in a raw roar of sound and ripped him from his feet, casting him headlong across the stairs, dragging his body headlong in a twisted tangle of broken limbs and shattered spars.

Naruto palmed his face and groaned.

"Luffy, what the hell?! I was going to do that! Do you have any idea what you just...oh, fuck it!"

Exasperated, he sighed softly.

"Smoothie! Clean up the rest, would you?"

As though waiting for that very moment, the door to the auction house burst open with a dull howl.

Then, quite suddenly, she was there.

Nami's jaw jaw hung agape as she beheld an exceptionally tall, statuesque woman from the Longleg Tribe towering over her, presenting her with a prime view of a tattooed leg. Blue eyes set in a tanned-yet-stern face framed by ashen hair narrowed upon the guards, assessing them, determining their worth. Clad in a pink striped leotard and wearing a large yellow scarf that flowed nearly to the ground, she looked like something fresh out of some mad wonderland. Long sleeves sheathed her long limbs to her elbows and a huge floppy cap resembling an over-sized beret, had taken up residence upon her head. There was more, to be sure, but despite that burning coal of anger in her chest, she found herself stricken speechless by the sight.

Words alone didn't do the stranger justice.

By contrast, her attire couldn't have more dissimilar.

Almost as an afterthought Smoothie lashed out, seizing the nearest guard.

In a flash, she'd snatched one of them up in a large hand.

"W-W-What're you doing?! Stop!"

Then she juiced them.

There could be no other explanation for the horror the Strawhats witnessed next; one moment the whitehead clutched a guard in hand, the next, she simply squeezed. Wringing her unlucky victim between her large hands, she squeezed the man's very fluids into a glass, leaving naught but a withered husk behind. Satisfied with her work, the large woman cast the desiccated body aside.

"Just who the hell is she...?" Nami hissed aside.

Blue eyes turned to regard her with just a hint of humor.

"Eh, poached her off a Yonkou when I was younger." pearly white teeth flashed in a grin. "Seriously, though. Fuck Big Mom. She's never been my favorite."

Nami felt her world spin.

"An Emperor...you actually pissed off an Emperor...

"Right, then!" The massive woman brandished her blade, causing those nearby to shrink back. "Next one to try that gets the same!"

Needless to say, no one protested.

A/N: Doffy bit will be next chapter!

Same for Roswald, unfortunately.

Didn't see that coming now, did you?

Yup, Naruto's taken Smoothie-and Pudding-under his wing.

I'm sure you already know this by now, but that act has consequences.

Remember, even in cannon our boy possesses a determination-if not charisma-that few can match. If he wants you to be his friend then damnit you're going to be his friend. If that means plunging into the territory of an Emperor to rescue a tormented soul, he'll do it in a heartbeat. Mind you, he isn't a pushover like the other World Nobles. You hit him; he'll slug you right back then drag you out for a round of drinks...with one exception.

Yes, he has a hatred for Big Mom.

That'll be elaborated later.

Personally, though?

I.

HATE.

BIG MOM.

I don't know why people sympathize with her, and I've seen her past. Yes, her parents couldn't handle her. Yes, they abandoned her. But I can't forgive her; not after all she's done. Monstrous strength or not, she had EVERY opportunity to become someone good! But what did she do? She turned into a glutton with a serious addiction to food. From there, she instead she decided to be a greedy little shit. She ATE her friends. Just...straight up ate them in an eating frenzy. To top if off, she KILLS her children when they don't suit her needs and torments them when it amuses her. Pudding, Chiffon, and Lola are prime examples of this, and to a lesser extent, Smoothie.

Linlin even has fucking FOOD TANTRUMS in which she'll eat or crush anything in her way.

I mean, Kaidou and the others emperors aren't saints but at least they don't EAT people and abuse their own children. That strikes a chord with me. A pirate she may well be, but that doesn't excuse her acts, or her own infantile mind.

If I have anything to say about it, she'll get a very rude awakening soon!

Phew, sorry about all of that! There we go, rant finally over!

Next chapter, Naruto pays the Four Emperors a visit!

So...in the immortal words of Atlas...

...Review, would you kindly?

And enjoy the previews!

I REGRET NOTHING!

(Preview!)

Robin blinked.

"What do you know of the true history?"

Blue eyes twinkled in silent scarlet relief. "Quite a bit, actually...


"Its a brew of my own making. Oughta put some pep back in your step."

"You saucy brat. I wasn't expecting this."

Naruto sketched a bow.

"Its what I do."


"You've got some nerve coming back here, brat!"

A lone iris turned to regard her.

"Shut your hole, Big Mom. I'm not here for your fatass. I came to see your Poneglyph."

Smoothi clamped a large hand over her mouth to stifle a smile.

Her mother's reaction was slightly more...profound by comparison.

"WHY YOU-?! Never! I'd sooner die than let you have a look at that piece after what you-

"Ah, ah, ah!" a finger wagged dangerously, hovering over the Den-Den-Mushi in his off hand. "You lay one finger on me and you'll have three admirals to deal with. Hmm. Maybe I should just press this button anyway? It'd be worth it to see that ugly mug of yours ground into paste. Or...

As she looked on, his body began to radiate fresh heat.

"Maybe I should just do it myself? By the way!"

A single finger rose in a salute.

"Pudding says hi!"

R&R! =D