Note: This new class is my own idea. Everything about his info is made up by me. The original classes, however, belong to Valve.
Meet the ROCKETEER
STARRING:
Randy (Engineer)
Boris (Heavy Weapons Guy)
Donald (Demoman)
Ludwig (Medic)
Jean-Philippe (Spy)
INTRODUCING:
Jason (Rocketeer)
"Where the hell is my jetpack?"
Jason looked everywhere for his sole possession in the fortress. He searched for it in the barracks, in the kitchen, in the towers, and even in the enclosed boxes that stood in the corners. His jetpack couldn't have just disappeared. The last time he saw it, he put it on top of his bunk bed. When he couldn't find it anywhere else, he decided to have a little chat with his new friends.
Outside, near the train tracks, he found Boris, Donald, Ludwig, and Jean-Philippe talking amongst each other while staring at the sky. This made him curious. He cleared his throat and, in a clean American accent, asked, "What's going on?"
Ludwig the Medic looked like he was hiding something. "Oh, nothing. Ve are vaiting for our turn."
"Your turn for WHAT?"
At that moment, something fell from the sky, but it didn't land on the ground. It flew past the train tracks and went back up into the sky. Jason recognized the man who had the jetpack strapped on his back. Randy the Engineer appeared exhilarated as he flew all around the fortress.
"YEE-HAA! I'm lovin' it!"
Jason yelled, "What the hell is he doing with my jetpack?"
Ludwig replied, "Don't you worry, he just vants to fly."
A few minutes later, Randy landed on his feet and turned off the jetpack. With a smile on his face, he said to Jason, "Boy, this is somethin' that's really special to me."
Jason asked, "What the hell do you know about it? You've only had it for five minutes."
"That's true, but I've really learned to love it. Where'd ya get it?"
"I got it from Hollywood."
"Fancy little prop, this is."
"It's not a prop…technically, it's something that the government tried to perfect. But they failed, so they gave up on it and sent it to us so that we could make our sci-fi movies with it."
"So it's a prop."
"…Whatever you say."
Ludwig raised his hands. "It is time for me to use it now."
Jason blurted, "Now, wait a minute! This thing isn't used for fun. It's primarily used for battle. Having your own jetpack is serious business."
Randy replied, "Son, I can see that this thing is important to ya. So I'll make a little offer."
"What kind of offer?"
"Let's say that Hollywood is runnin' out of ideas. They don't have the passion and energy to make films like Casablanca and Dr. Strangelove. It no longer has the star power to survive, and it shuts down for good. But suppose you bring a little redemption to Southern California."
Jason raised an eyebrow. "I'm listening."
"My buddies and I have plenty of stories to tell. You can write the script, you'll send it back home, producers will be excitin' again, and you'll become one heck of a millionaire."
"That sounds almost impossible…but it also sounds quite enticing."
"But first, we'll have to make a little compromise."
"And what's that?"
Donald the Demoman replied, "We give you the movies, you give us flying lessons."
Jason whispered to himself, "This ought to be interesting."
For the next half hour, Ludwig, Donald, Boris, and Jean-Philippe took turns in flying in the air. Much to their surprise, the jetpack was rather hard to handle.
Ludwig found himself struggling to keep composure as he flew in the air. He looked terribly nervous as he kept dodging walls and trucks. For a time, he screamed. "I'm getting sick!"
Jason felt a bit amused that the Medic himself was immersed in fright. But then, Jason was amazed when Donald took his turn. Before his feet even separated from the floor, the Scotsman had taken a few sips from his bottle of "scrumpy." Now, as he flew up in the air, he appeared as drunk as a lazy beaver. He looked like he laid his back on thin air. Even worse, he sang "Amazing Grace" at least twice. In the end, however, he crashed into a wall and dropped to the ground like an anvil.
Boris the Heavy Weapons Guy didn't fare much better. In fact, he couldn't even lift himself of the ground. Even when the jetpack went into full mode, he couldn't move. With his arms crossed, Jason stared at Boris's feet, which didn't even flinch. Then, he looked up and saw a tear sliding down the Russian's cheek.
Jean-Philippe the Spy made a mocking cackle as he flew through the air at waist level. As he smoothly soared past the rest of the group, he crossed his legs and placed his hands on the back of his head. He truly looked as if he lay down on an invisible hammock. "Gentlemen? Huh-huh-huh-huh."
Jason shook his head in disbelief. Jean-Philippe looked so casual when he used the jetpack. He probably must've used one before.
Jason examined his jetpack after the supposed flying lessons were over. "It's a good thing that this didn't die off already. I'd be out of a job."
Randy asked, "Do you need any gasoline?"
"I don't need any. This jetpack runs on batteries."
Jean-Philippe re-adjusted his tie. "That was such a refreshing experience, I do say."
Boris frowned. "I feel nothing but shame."
Jason almost chuckled. "Then buy yourself some vegetables."
As he put on his helmet, Randy uttered, "Tell me somethin', Jason. What's it like workin' in Hollywood?"
"Oh, it's just like any other career in good ol' America, except fame and fortune ALWAYS matter."
Boris asked, "What made you join our team?"
"To tell you the truth, I wanted a little adventure. After writing script after script after script of low-budget material, you get tired afterwards. Not even the women and the beaches can bring it up a notch."
Randy smiled. "Well, you've come to the right place. There's plenty of action goin' on around here."
Suddenly, Jason spotted something in the distance. "And judging by that Payload cart that's heading this way, I don't think I have a reason to complain."
The men turned their attention at the other side of the railroad tracks. Members from the BLU Team began to push a cart towards their intended destination.
Randy blurted, "Ah hell! We got company!"
Donald brandished his grenade launcher. "Arm yourselves, men!"
Everyone prepared themselves for battle. Jason strapped on his jetpack and said, "This is gonna be good."
Jean-Philippe loaded his revolver. "But first, please tell me that you accept our offer."
Jason put on his sunglasses. "Don't worry. I won't let you guys down."
He brandished his weapon: a STEN submachine gun. As soon as his new friends charged at their enemies, Jason turned on his jetpack. He flew up in the air and headed towards the Payload cart.
When Boris fired his Minigun and Randy ran straight ahead with his shotgun, Jason found himself right on top of the Payload cart. The BLU Team focused on the Medic, Engineer, Demoman, and the Heavy Weapons Guy. Jason's friends became good distractions. He pulled the trigger, and fast-moving bullets fell from the sky. Members from the BLU Team took direct hits and collapsed on the ground. They didn't even know what hit them. As Jason reloaded, a couple of BLU soldiers looked up and spotted their attacker. They fired their rocket launchers at him, but he easily dodged them by strafing in the air. He fired his weapon again.
But then, his jetpack began to overheat. He knew what he had to do. As he turned off his jetpack and descended onto the dirt floor, he switched from the STEN to a pump-action shotgun. He completely annihilated a Sniper with an SMG. A BLU Scout was about to squeeze the trigger of his scattergun, but Jean-Philippe stabbed him in the back (in the disguise of a Pyro). The Scout screamed in pain and finally dropped dead on the floor. The RED Team became victorious.
Jean-Philippe gave Jason a smile. "You've done well."
Jason chuckled. "Thank you. You're too kind."
And so the day after the skirmish, Jason began to take notes on the stories from the RED Team. Unfortunately, he grew tired of that as well. The stories didn't seem to make a lot of sense, especially Ludwig's tale of confronting three dozen Spies with just one syringe, and Boris's of eating fifteen sandwiches in one sitting. In the end, however, he assumed that these stories would give Hollywood a jump start if it experienced a crisis of derivative filmmaking. He was still glad that he joined the fortress, and he hoped that he saw more action.
TO BE CONTINUED...
INFO
ROCKETEER
Real Name: Jason
Age: 24
Ethnicity: Mongolian
Place of Origin: Hollywood, Los Angeles, California
Health: 125
Job: Offense
Appearance: Clean shaven, short hair, sunglasses (on and off)
Clothes: Red/Blue-colored Jumpsuit, black gloves, jetpack strapped behind back
Sprinting Speed: As fast as Medic
Weakness: Like the Scout and Spy, the Rocketeer as low health.
ARSENAL
Primary Weapon: STEN (submachine gun)
Ammo: 40 out of 160 Rounds
Damage: 13 to 20 per round
Crit Damage: 53 to 60 per round
Pro: Very high accuracy
Con: Slow reloading; lower accuracy when flying in the air
Secondary Weapon: 12-Gauge Shotgun
Ammo: 6 out of 32
Damage: Up to 40
Crit Damage: Up to 125
Pro: Very effective at close range
Con: Not very effective at long range
Additional Information: This shotgun is standard. It's the same one that Pyro, Heavy, and Soldier possess.
Melee Weapon: Tire Iron
Damage: Up to 50
Crit Damage: Up to 150
Specialty: Jetpack
Info: When using the jetpack, the Rocketeer will fly high up into the air, so much so that he'll be able to fly over rooftops. He can even land and walk on rooftops. Also, when the jetpack overheats, the Rocketeer will drop down on the floor. He will lose up to 50 Health when landing on his feet at a high distance. Finally, the jetpack will turn on and off when using the "Jump" button. This means that the Rocketeer cannot jump in a normal matter, as the "Jump" button will automatically activate the jetpack.
Lifespan: Forty seconds before overheating
Unlock/Drop/Purchase/Craft Items
Primary Weapon: 20th Century Striker (Uzi submachine gun)
Ammo: 30 out of 150 Rounds
Damage: 19 to 29 per round
Crit Damage: 77 to 87 per round
Pro: Deals greater damage to enemies than STEN; Increases maximum health at 150
Con: Lower accuracy; smaller clip size
Additional Information: The name of the weapon is a play on "20th Century Fox."
Primary Weapon: L.A. Undertaker (MP5 submachine gun)
Ammo: 30 out of 150 Rounds
Damage: 19 to 29 per round
Crit Damage: 77 to 87 per round
Pro: Accuracy stays the same even when flying in the air; faster reloading
Con: Smaller clip size
Secondary Weapon: Stop the Motion (Hand Grenade)
Ammo: 3 in Total
Damage: Up to 80
Crit Damage: Up to 245
Pro: Deals high damage to enemies
Con: Low ammunition
Additional Information: Stop the Motion grenades can only be thrown at a far distance. They can't be thrown a few feet in front of you. Plus, they have a 1 1/2-second delay before they explode on impact.
Secondary Weapon: Spy-O-Vision (Sunglasses)
Ammo: None
Damage: None
Crit Damage: None
Pro: These sunglasses allow you to see through the disguise of an enemy spy.
Con: Since this is very useful against enemy spies, it will be very hard to unlock: a total of 50 Rocketeer achievements. It cannot be purchased or dropped. It can be crafted, though items will be rare and hard to find.
Melee Weapon: Instant Retake (Lug Wrench)
Damage: Up to 60
Crit Damage: Up to 180
Melee Weapon: Hollywood Harvester (Scythe)
Damage: Up to 60
Crit Damage: Up to 180
Additional Information: Each kill refreshes health by 20
Specialty: Low-Rider (Jetpack)
Info: While it is not intended for flying, this jetpack allows you to sprint much faster than usual (slightly faster than Scout). It helps whenever you're cornered by enemies, or rushing towards a control point. This item can be either unlocked or dropped.
Lifespan: Six seconds
Coming up next:
Meet the ASSASSIN
Meet the OUTLAW
Meet the WEATHERMAN
Meet the FEMME FATALE
Meet the BODYGUARD
