Holding On And Letting Go

Where It All Begins: Season 1 Episode 1 Pilot TVD

3rd P.O.V

Seraphina jumps off the roof in the Salvatore Boarding House as she leaves to hunt in her mind thinking: for over a century, I have lived in secret, hiding in the shadows, alone in the world. Until now, I am a vampire. And this is my story. She jumps over rocks as she runs she says lowly to herself "I shouldn't have come home. I know the risk, but I had no choice. I have to know him." With that she springs for an oncoming deer and tears into its throat.

Seraphina P.O.V

I climbed out of bed as I went out and hunted. After I had a deer I rushed and showered as I put on my clothes. Dark grey skinny jeans, black T-shirt, converses, and leather jacket. I let my hair fall out in waves. I pulled on my shades and to my car. I had to 'register' for school today. I climbed into my nice little Altima and went to school.

3rd P.O.V

"Major lack of girl material, dude, there's a thing called too much pink." Boston said to Ethan as they were at Ethan's locker. Boston wrinkled his nose at a preppy blonde girl. Ethan sighed as he said "you picking on girl's now, man?" Boston rolled his eyes as he shoved Ethan. Ethan rolled his eyes and looked up. Madeline or Maddi as everyone calls her looked up. Ethan waved at her and she looked away, slammed her locker and walked away. Ethan turned to Boston "she hates me." Boston replied "that's not hate. That's you-dumped-me-but-I'm-too-popular-to-show-it-but-secretly-I'm-listening-to-Celine-Deon's-greatest-hits."

Carter approaches the two guys and says "Ethan, dude!" He gives him a man hug and asks "how are you? It's good to see you. How is he? Is he alright?" Ethan annoyed pushed his backpack on him as he says "man, Carter I'm right here. And I'm good thanks." Carter disbelievingly asks "really?" Ethan said "yeah, I'm fine." Carter claps him on the shoulder. Ethan nods at him. Carter said "catch you later." Boston nods and says "sure, yeah." He leaves and Ethan says "wow." Boston smirks as he says "I'm not even gonna say anything."

Seraphina P.O.V

I strolled through the hallway as people stopped to look at me. I heard whispers start and I rolled my eyes. Typical teenagers. I walked into the office. The secretary asked "can I help you?" I took off my sunglasses as I answered "I think you can."

3rd P.O.V

Boston snatched Ethan "hold up who's this?" Ethan turned and they looked into the office as Ethan said "all I see is back." The person clearly was feminine as they could see the curves. "That's one hot"- Ethan shoved him as he knew he was going to be crude. Boston grinned as he said "what? I was going to say back." Ethan rolled his eyes "sure you were."

Seraphina P.O.V

The secretary said "your records are incomplete. You're missing immunization records, and we do insist on transcripts." I looked into her eyes as I said "please look again. I'm sure everything you need is there, isn't it?" She numbly nods at me and says "you're right, so it is." I sighed softly I hated this, playing with their minds.

3rd P.O.V

Boston says "I'm sensing Seattle, and she's a lead singer." Ethan said "you're really going to run this whole psychic thing into the ground huh?" Boston nodded "pretty much." A voice says "Jenny good batch, dude." Ethan pissed says "I'll be right back." Boston didn't hear him as he was focused on the office girl and was reciting "please be hot."

Ethan stormed into the girls' bathroom. A girl who was applying makeup screamed and ran out. Ethan grabbed Jenny's face as he said "great. It's the first day of school and you're stoned." Jenny said "no, I'm not." Ethan started patting her down as he asked "where is it? Is it on you?" Jenny moved as she said "stop, alright! You need to chill yourself, alright?" Ethan snorted "chill myself? What is that stoner talk? Chill myself?" Jenny said "look stop! I don't have anything on me. Are you crazy?" Ethan growled out "you haven't seen crazy, Jenny! I gave you a summer pass, but I am done watching you destroy yourself! No, no, no, you know what? Go ahead, keep it. But just know that I am gonna be every time to kill your buzz every time got it? I know who you are, and it's not this person. Don't be this person." Jenny scoffed as she said "I don't need this." She left. Ethan sighs and follows. That where it happens.

Seraphina P.O.V

I thanked the secretary as I walked out and saw a teenager by the office staring. I rolled my eyes and made my way to the restroom. As I'm about to walk inside a guy runs into me. I look at him in shock once our eyes connect. Kayden. I breathed in only to smell human blood and innocence in those light brown eyes. I averted them as I said "uh, excuse me. Um…is this the girls' restroom?" Ethan stuttered as a blush appeared on his cheeks as he said "yes. I was just, um- I was just-it's a long story. Just…" he made to leave and I moved but we moved the same way. This happened three more times until I just moved to the side and let him pass. "Thanks," He muttered his face was beat red. I watched him leave. He wasn't Kayden, but how did they look exactly alike?

3rd P.O.V

Mr. Tanner droned on and on about Virginia or something while Seraphina was too busy staring at Ethan. Boston saw this and texted him. Seraphina all the while was comparing Ethan to Kayden. There were tons of similarities in appearance but none in personality. And she was grateful for that. Once Ethan turned to look at her she looked away. She probably shouldn't stare but she couldn't help it.

Seraphina P.O.V

After school I went hunting again. If I wanted to not kill people I needed all the help I could get, which meant hunting daily. I sighed as I decided to visit my parents' graves. As I ran there I heard a short yelp and I raced to the source where I saw Ethan crouched at. I flashed in front of him as I ask "you okay?" He gets up and asks "were you following me?" I replied "no, I just, I just saw you fall." Ethan narrowed his eyes "uh huh and you just happened to be hanging around in a cemetery." I narrowed my eyes as I stated "we're in a cemetery, usually where loved ones are. I'm visiting, I have family here."

Ethan's eyes widened as he said "oh, wow, tactless. Really, I'm not a jerk, like you must think. I'm sorry. It's the fog. It's making me foggy. And then back there, there was this-this bird and it was all very Hitchcock for a second. That is the bird movie right, the Hitchcock? I'm Ethan." I looked around for a second. I opened my senses but found nothing or anyone. I said "I'm Seraphina." Ethan nodded and said "I know. We have History together." I didn't like how that sounded so I quickly added "and English and French." I couldn't help myself from pulling a twig from his shoulder. He said "thanks. Nice ring." I looked at my right ring finger and saw it. I nervously stumbled over my words as I said "oh, um it's a family ring. I'm kind of stuck with it. It's weird huh?" Ethan said "no, no, it's just. I mean, there are rings and then there's that." As I breathed in another scent hit me. A coppery, delicious, scent. Blood.

I asked "did you hurt yourself?" He asked "hmm?" I repeated "did you hurt yourself?" Ethan crouched down "I don't know." He rolled up his pant leg and a saw a flash of red as I turned around quickly. I breathe in fresh air but it's a bad idea once his scent hits me. My veins pop out as my eyes turn red. "Are you okay?" I hear him ask. I swiftly say "you should go. Take care of that." With that I flash away once I see him look away. I trudge through the forest and take down a deer and rabbit. I go back to the cemetery just to make sure she wasn't back. I walk up to the Gilbert's grave and see a journal open. I crouch down as I picked it up and read inside: Ethan Gilbert. I closed it and hunted another rabbit before heading home and greeting Zach. I head to my room and grab my diary. I begin: I lost control today. Everything I've kept buried inside came rushing to the surface. I'm simply not able to resist him.

3rd P.O.V

Carter and Boston enter the Mystic Grill. Carter was always one of those guys who were desperate to get laid. And when he wanted a girl, he wanted her. Usually he had one stable girlfriend and they'd make up wedding plans until they break up six months later because the girl found someone better. Carter said to Boston "her name is Seraphina Salvatore. She lives with her uncle up at the old Salvatore Boarding House. She hasn't lived here since she was a kid. Military family, so they moved around a lot. She's an Aries and her favorite color is grey or black or green." Boston shocked asked "you got all of that in one day?" Carter snorted and said "no dumbass. I got that between third and fourth period. We're planning a June wedding."

Seraphina P.O.V

I looked up at the Gilbert house and smiled as I walked up the steps. As I stood there and was about to knock I heard footsteps. Ethan opened the door and slightly jumped "oh." He said. I smiled politely as I said "sorry, I was about to knock. I wanted to apologize for my disappearing act earlier. I know it was…strange." Ethan smirked and Kayden's face appeared. It quickly dissolve one I saw the playfulness in his eyes as he said "no worries. I get it, blood makes you squeamish." I smiled as I said "something like that. How's your leg?" He replied "oh, it's fine. Just a scratch, barely. How did you know where I live?" I smiled as I said "it's a small town; I asked the first person I saw. Um, I thought you might want this back." I handed him the journal. He flushed as he grabbed it and said "oh, um I must've dropped it. I uh thanks."

I saw his flustered appearance and said "don't worry, I didn't read it." He asked "no? Why not? Most people would have." I replied "well I wouldn't want anyone to read mine." Ethan's eyes widened "you keep a journal?" I nodded as I said "yeah, if I don't write it down I forget it. Memories are too important." Ethan nodded as he said "yeah. I'm just gonna…um; you don't have to stay out there." I try to push forward but I'm blocked by the threshold. I say "I'm fine. Sorry, were you going somewhere?" I didn't want to intrude, but I couldn't stay away from him. He said "yeah, I'm meeting a friend. Do you want to come?"

3rd P.O.V

Maddi asks Boston "how's Ethan doing?" Boston replied "his mom and dad died. How do you think? He's putting on a good face, but it's only been four months." Maddi asked "has he said anything about me?" Boston shook his head "oh, no. I'm not getting in the middle. Pick up the phone and call him. You know he's tried." Maddi shuddered "I feel weird calling him. He broke up with me." Boston says "give it more time Maddi." Seraphina and Ethan come in. Everyone is staring at them. "More time huh?" Maddi asked sarcastically.

Seraphina P.O.V

I walked into the grill beside Ethan. He was two heads taller than me. As we walked in he said "Boston's over there." He led the way and a pretty blonde came up to us. She smiled at us as she said "hey, I'm Maddi, nice to meet you." I shook her hand as I said "hi, Seraphina." Ethan glanced at her and said "hey." Maddi looked at him "hey," then she walked away.

3rd P.O.V

"So you were born in Mystic Falls?" Carter asked. Seraphina nodded and said "um huh and moved when I was still young." Boston asked "parents?" Seraphina answered "my parents passed away." Ethan immediately sent her an understanding look as he said "I'm sorry, any siblings?" Seraphina tensed but answered honestly "none that I talk to. I live with my uncle." Carter turned on his charms as he said "so Seraphina, if you're new, then you don't know about the party tomorrow." Boston explained "it's a back to school thing." Seraphina turned to Ethan and shyly asked "are you going?" Boston grinned and responded "of course he is."

Seraphina P.O.V

"You promised." Zach says. He showed me an article of an animal attack. I answered "this was an animal attack." Zach said "don't give me that. I know the game. You tear them up enough they always suspect an animal attack. You said you had it under control." I replied "I do." Zach pleaded "please Aunt Sera, Mystic Falls is a different place now. It's been quiet for years, but there are people who still remember. And you being here, it's just gonna stir things up." I said "it's not my intention." Zach said "then what is? Why did you come back? After all this time, why now?' I replied "I don't have to explain myself." Zach said "I know that you can't change what you are. But you don't belong here anymore." I questioned "then where do I belong?" He said "I can't tell you what to do. But coming back here was a mistake."

3rd P.O.V

Tanner explained "the Battle of Willow Creek took place right at the end of the war on our very own Mystic Falls. How many casualties resulted in this battle? Mr. Bennett?" Boston said "um…a lot. I'm not sure, like a whole lot." Mr. Tanner said "and the jock stereotype still stands. What about you Ms. Donovan? Want to change your rugby stereotype?" Maddi said "it's okay, Mr. Tanner, I'm cool with it." Mr. Tanner looked at Ethan and said "hmm, Ethan surely you can enlighten us about one of the town's most significantly historical events?" Ethan blushed as he shook his head and said "I'm sorry, I-I don't know." Mr. Tanner said "I was willing to be lenient last year for obvious reasons, Ethan. But the personal excuses ended with summer break."

Seraphina was fuming but kept her cool as she casually said "there were 346 casualties, unless you're counting local civilians." Mr. Tanner said "that's correct Miss?" Seraphina said "Salvatore." Mr. Tanner said "Salvatore. Any relation to the original settlers here in Mystic Falls?" Seraphina twirled a pencil as she nodded and said "distantly." Mr. Tanner said "well, very good. Except, of course there were no civilian casualties in this battle." Seraphina who was laid back in her seat said "actually there were 27, sir. Confederate soldiers, they fired on the church, believing it to be housing weapons. They were wrong. It was a night of great loss. The founder's archives are, uh stored in civil hall if you'd like to uh, brush up on your facts, Mr. Tanner."

Seraphina P.O.V

I arrive at the party and close my eyes as I try to locate Ethan by his voice. "People look up to me; I have to set an example." Ethan tells Boston. Boston says "just admit it, dude." Ethan relents "okay, she's nice to look at." Boston said "dude, she's beautiful, and has that deep, emotional look in novels." Ethan quoted "yeah, she looked at him with so many emotions in her eyes." As I listened I'm interrupted as Carter walks up to me. "Hey, you made it!" He said to me. I nodded as I said "I did." Carter said "well, let's get you a drink." I replied "well, I'm"- I was cut off as Carter grabbed my arm and dragged me away saying "oh, come on."

3rd P.O.V

"What?" Boston looked at Ethan as he said "that was weird. When I touched you I saw a crow." Ethan asked "what?" Boston said "a crow. There was fog, a girl. I'm drunk. It's the drinking, there's nothing psychic about it. Yeah? Okay, I'm gonna get a refill." Boston leaves Ethan. Ethan says "ok? Boston!" He turns around and Seraphina is in front of him. "Hi," Seraphina says sweetly while smiling. Ethan who had jumped says "hi." Seraphina winced as she said "I did it again didn't I?" Ethan said "yeah." Seraphina apologized "I'm sorry. You're upset about something." Ethan said "oh, uh, no. It's-it's just Boston. He's…you know what. Never mind, you're…here." Seraphina nodded as she said "yes, I'm here."

Seraphina P.O.V

As we walked around Ethan says "you know you're kind of the talk of the town." I asked "am I?" Ethan said "um huh. Pretty, mysterious, new girl, oh yeah." I replied "well, you have the mysterious thing going too, tinged in sadness." Ethan replied "I'm not the only one. What makes you think I'm sad?" I answered "well, we did meet in a graveyard." Ethan explained "right. Well no, technically we met in the girls' room. You don't want to know, it's…it's not exactly party talk." I insisted "well, I've never really been very good at uh, party talk." Ethan explained "last spring…my parent's car drove off of a bridge into the lake. And I was in the backseat and I survived, but…they didn't. So that's my story."

My heart clenched for him, and because I knew his story better than anyone. I said "you won't be sad forever, Ethan." He smiled at me warmly. We kept on walking to a bridge. I randomly said "I like Boston he seems like a good friend." Ethan nodded as he said "he's a good guy. Best friend in the world." I gently pried "and Maddi she can't seem to, uh, take her eyes of us." Ethan says "Maddi's that friend since childhood that you start dating because you owe it to yourselves to see if you can be more." I ask "and?" He answered "and then my parents died and everything changes. Anyway, Maddi and I together we just, I don't know, it wasn't, um…it wasn't…" I asked "passionate?" He looked into my eyes and said "no, no it wasn't passionate." My throat started burning and I knew my body and emotions were working together. Ethan asked "hey are you okay? Your eye, it just, it's"- I cut him off "oh, um yeah, no. It's nothing. Are you thirsty? I am. I'm going to get something to drink." I hurriedly walked away.

3rd P.O.V

Ethan is looking away and at Seraphina as she gets drinks. "Looking for someone?" Ethan looked beside him to see Maddi and said "hey, Maddi." Maddi said "when you broke up with me, you said it was because you needed some time alone. You don't look so alone to me." Ethan shook his head "Maddi you don't understand. It's"- Maddi now shook her head "that's okay, Ethan. You do what you have to do. I just want to let you know that…I still believe in us. And I'm not giving up on that." Ethan sadly looks at Maddi "Maddi…"

Seraphina P.O.V

As I approach Ethan, Carter jumps in between the way. He says "hey! There you are. Have you been down to the falls yet? Because they are really cool at night and…I can show you. If you want." I see him stagger some as he tries to keep his cool pose. I said "I think you've had too much to drink."

Carter rolled his eyes "well of course I have. So, come on. Let's go down to the falls and get to know each other better." I had tried to be nice, I really did. But he just annoyed me too much; I said "look, I'm sorry Carter. You and I aren't going to happen, I'm really sorry." I turned and walked towards Ethan. As I handed him a cup he said "I was wondering who abducted you, but now I know." I blushed as I said "I didn't-we weren't-is he like that with all the girls?" Ethan defended him "no, you're fresh meat. He'll back off eventually. Hmm. God, you gotta be kidding me!" I asked "what is it?" He answered "my sister." I looked to where she was looking and I asked "the drunken one?" He answered "that would be the one. Excuse me." I asked "need some help?" He shook his head as he said "trust me you're not going to want to witness this. Jenny! Jenny!" I turned around and shook my head. This is what I wanted right? A regular life? I wanted to be with Ethan, I wanted him and I was going to do everything I could to protect him. I heard yelling and walked towards it.

As I looked at closer I saw Vance Donovan, Maddi's brother with a bite on his neck. A vampire bite. I turned around and a name came in through my head. I ran away as I ran to the Boarding House.

"What's going on?" Zach questioned me. I answered "someone else was attacked tonight, Zach and it wasn't me." I walked into my bedroom. As I did a crow flew in.

"Delilah," I breathed to myself. Delilah stood on the balcony, her blonde hair shining, green eyes gleaming maliciously, as she said "hello, sister." I asked "crow's a bit much don't you think?" She replied "wait till you see what I can do with the fog." I flashbacked to where Ethan had said a crow and fog. I asked "when'd you get here?" She smirked as she said "well, I couldn't miss your first day of school. Your hair's different, I like it." I said "it's been 15 years, Delilah." Delilah said "thank god. I couldn't take another day of the nineties. That horrible bob haircut, did not suit you. Remember Sera, it's important to stay away from fads."

I cut the bull and asked "why are you here?" She said "I miss my little sister." I accused "you hate small towns. It's boring, there's nothing for you to do." Delilah said "I've managed to keep myself busy." I asked "you know you left that girl alive tonight. That's very clumsy of you." Delilah held up a finger "that can be problem…for you." She pointed at me. I asked "why are you here now?" She replied "I could ask you the same question. However, I'm fairly certain your answer can be summed up all into one little word…Ethan."

"He took my breath away, Ethan. He's a dead ringer for Kayden. Is it working Sera? Being around him, being in his world? Does it make you feel alive?" I immediately responded "he's not Kayden." Delilah said "let's hope not. We both know how that ended. Tell me something, when's the last time you had something stronger than a squirrel?" I shook my head a small smile on my face "I know what you're doing, Delilah. It's not going to work." Delilah said "yeah? Come on. Don't you crave a little?" She hit me and I said "stop it." She continued "let's do it, together. I saw a couple guys out there. Or just, let's just cut right to the chase; let's just go straight for Ethan." I growled out "Stop it!" Delilah hit me again as she said "imagine what his blood tastes like!" My veins popped out under my eyes as I turned around to block her out. "I can," Delilah said. I yelled "I said stop!" I tackled her as we went through my window.

As I look around Delilah isn't there, I get up slowly and painfully. Delilah says "I was impressed. I give it a 6. Missing style, but I was pleasantly surprised. Very good with the whole –rawr- face thing. It was good." I said "you know it's all fun and games, Delilah huh? But wherever you go people die." Delilah said "that's a given." I said "not here. I won't allow it." Delilah smirked "I take that as an invitation." I pleaded "Delilah, please. After all these years can't we just give it a rest?" Even after everything, I loved her; she was my sister after all. Delilah's face turned serious "I promised you an eternity of misery, so I'm just keeping my word." I pleaded "just stay away from Ethan."

"Where's your ring? Oh, yeah sun's coming up in a couple of hours and poof, ashes to ashes. Relax its right here." I tensely reach for it but Delilah grabs my neck and into a wall. She threatens "you should know better to think you're stronger than me. You lost that fight when you stopped feeding on people. I wouldn't try it again. I think we woke Zach up. Sorry Zach." I silently watched as she walked away whistling.

I slowly trudge up to my room and grab my diary as I start writing: I had a plan. I wanted to change who I was, create a life as someone without the past, someone alive. The bad things follow you. You can't escape them as much as you want to.

As I sat in my room deliberating everything, my whole life I made a choice. I jumped out of my window and ran to Ethan's. I slowly walked up to his window, where he's at writing in his journal. He smiles at me and I smile back. I walk to the front door and as he opens it I say "I know it's late. But, uh…I needed to know that you were okay." Ethan said "you know for months that all everyone ever asked me, if I'll be ok." I questioned "what did you tell them?" He responded "that I'll be fine." I asked "do you ever mean it?" He said "ask me tomorrow." I turned away, as my cue to leave when he says "it's warmer in the house, we can talk. Would you like to come in?" I turned back around small shy smile on my face as I said "yes," and I entered his house.