CHAPTER 2- Going Home
The day of my eighteenth birthday I went to my mom's attorney who had my mother's life insurance account. I worked out all the money plans. I got a large lump sum put into a checking account and a monthly payment. My mom made sure if something happened to her I would never have to worry about money or working. It made me wonder how much she did truly care about me. This made me want to investigate her death. In order to do so I needed to go back to Charming.
My mom's house was still there and left for me. I debated on going back for months. I wanted to go back for two reasons; first, to investigate my mom's murder and second to face my father.
He knew I was his daughter for all these years but never said a word about it. I tried to think of a way that made would have been in my best interest but nothing made any sense to me. Finally, just before my nineteenth birthday I packed up everything and went back to my mom's house.
My mom's house, my house now, was just a few blocks into Charming. As I drove with a car full of my stuff I wondered what I would do when I got there. I hadn't seen Jax in over two years. The last time I saw him; he came to visit once and it was a visit I was grateful for. He told me that his heart still belonged to me and mine to him.
No matter how many men I had been with, Jax was the only one I truly felt connected to. Every other man was just meaningless sex. I wondered if he still felt the same and if we could find out if he and I could work.
Kaden had moved to LA when she turned eighteen. We were always close friends. She stayed with me for a few months but moved back to Charming six months after moving to LA. I had told Kaden that I was moving back to my mom's house and she promised to keep it a secret until I was ready to show my face.
I got to the house just before midnight. When I walked in, nothing had changed since the last time I was there. I pulled all the covers off the furniture and emptied my car. I parked my car in the attached garage so no one would know I was here just yet. I fell asleep on the couch at four in the morning. I had to do some shopping the next day for furniture and other household items.
I woke the next morning just after ten in the morning. After a long shower, I got dressed and decided to head to the local furniture store. I wasn't sure I wanted anyone to know I was in town so I took the long way around, not using main streets. I got to the store and shopped for a while. On my way back to the house I stopped for groceries. As I was getting into my car I saw Gemma and a blonde woman walking into the store. Gemma's eyes locked on mine. I left before she could make her way toward me.
Kaden met me at the house to help remove the old furniture as the new pieces being delivered later that afternoon. We put all the old furniture in the garage and redecorated the house to more of my style. After dinner Kaden went home and I went to watch a movie in my new bed.
Sometime later I fell asleep. Suddenly I felt strong arms wrap around me and lips press against my neck. The second the lips touched my neck I felt a surge go through me and I knew exactly who it was.
"Jax" I rolled over and looked into his gorgeous blue eyes. I hadn't realized how much I missed him until he was holding me.
"Zoey" He smiled then kissed me but it ended fast and he looked ashamed.
"What's wrong?" I hated that he looked pained.
"How come you didn't tell me you were coming?" He stared into my eyes as if he could see into my soul.
"I was going to find you tomorrow. I'm not sure why I came, Jax. I found out some things and I want the truth but I don't know if I can handle it." Tears filled my eyes as I remembered finding the birth certificate.
"What did you find out?" He sat up as if he too had something to hide.
"What are you not telling me Jax?" I sat up and made him look at me.
"Z, you know I have always loved you." He started and I nodded. "I haven't heard from you in over two years. I was lonely." He stopped as if he didn't know how to tell me.
"Jax, I'm sorry. I never meant to stay away so long but I was afraid I would come back and you would be with someone else. I wasn't sure I could handle that." I got up and started to pace.
"I got married last year." He blurted out.
I was stunned. I had thought about what to do if he was with someone else before I came but now that I knew for sure my heart shattered into pieces. I had to pull myself together and not show him how much it hurt.
"Wow, Jax, Congratulations." I faked a smile and left the room heading to the kitchen for a drink and cigarette.
Jax quickly followed behind me. "Zoey, wait"
I grabbed a cigarette and lit it before turning to face him. I hated the tears in my eyes for giving me away. "No Jax it's great that you're married. I mean it." He knew I was lying.
"Z, you left me. I was lost without you. Wendy came along and I started dating her. She wanted to get married so I did." Jax looked into my eyes.
"Jax, I was the one that left so I didn't expect you to wait around me." I hated the words that came from my mouth but it was true. "I'm glad that we can still be friends, right?"
"Of course Zoey; you mean the world to me. I'm glad to have you back home." He smiled as we sat at the kitchen table. I could tell his smile was forced.
"Can I get you something to drink?" I got up and went to the fridge.
"Sure water" He stared at me. I grabbed two bottles of water and turned to go sit back down but Jax was standing in front of me. He put his hands on each side of my waist and pulled me against him. He stared into my eyes as he leaned in and pressed his lips to mine. Slowly his lips parted mine and his tongue slid into my mouth. Our tongues move in sync with each other.
I dropped the waters on the floor and wrapped my arms around his neck. As much as I didn't want to help him cheat on his wife, I still wanted him so badly I couldn't stop him. His hands slid down to my tights and he lifted me up. I wrapped my legs around his waist. Still lip locked he walked into my bedroom.
He set me down in front of my bed and started removing my clothes. I pulled off his kutt and t-shirt by the time he had me in only my panties and bra. He finished taking his clothes off as I laid on the bed. He grabbed the top of my panties and pulled them off slowly, then climbed in bed on top of me. For the next two hours we made love to each other slowly, enjoying every second of it.
When we finished I quickly got dressed and sat on the edge of the bed while Jax got dressed. I wasn't sure what to do. I couldn't be the reason he divorced his wife or be the other women. I loved Jax more than anything but he was married and I wasn't going to stand in the way of that. I debated on going back to LA and forgetting Charming all together.
I got up and went to the kitchen without even a look at Jax. I grabbed new bottles of water after replacing the ones on the floor. I sat at the table smoking. Jax walked into the kitchen and sat in the chair across of me. His eyes were full of questions. As I stared into his eyes I realized there was no way I could be just his friend. That's when I decided to stay long enough to investigate my mother's murder and talk to my father. I had to know why he never wanted me. Then I was going back to LA.
Just as Jax was about to say something his phone rang. He excused himself to the other room. After a few minutes he came back into the kitchen. "I'm sorry I have to go. Club business."
"Yeah" I got up and started to walk past him.
Jax grabbed my arm. "We need to talk more. Come by the clubhouse later."
"I don't think that's a good idea." I tried to walk away but he held my arm tighter.
"Z, please the guys wanna see you too. At least do it for them." He begged.
"Fine, I'll stop by later." I looked into his eyes and saw the pain I was causing him. "We can talk more later, I promise."
Jax nodded, kissed me quickly, than left. I went to my room and sat on my bed. I hated that the love I had for Jax was so strong and I couldn't just get over it.
I went into the spare room, my old room, to organize it enough. Kaden was planning to stay with me for a little while, so I wanted her to have the room to herself. I opened the door and noticed all the boxes of my mom's old knick knacks. I grabbed a box and headed for the garage. I was planning to put the boxes in the attic above the garage.
When I pulled the attic door open, the latter fell allowing me passage to the attic. Slowly I climbed the ladder and flipped on the light. I hadn't been in the attic since my mom was alive. Inside there was four Rubbermaid totes. The first two were full of pictures and photo albums. The next one was full of paperwork. I started looking through it. Most of it was my old school work, old bills, and bank account information. On the bottom were five notebooks.
I opened the first one and started reading. As I read I realized it was detail accounts of SAMCRO's illegal activity. I was confused on why my mom was writing everything down. Under the last notebook was a large rectangle envelope from the County courts. My mom was being charged with four counts of drug trafficking, two counts of assault, and one federal weapons charge. If she would of been convicted she would have served forty-five years in federal prison. I grabbed the tote and carried it down to my room.
Just as I stepped into my room I heard a motorcycle pull up. I wasn't sure who it was so I quickly hid the tote in my closet under other boxes and clothes.
When I walked into the kitchen I saw four men standing in my kitchen. "Tigs" I squealed and hugged my favorite uncle. "Bobby" I hugged him too. I couldn't believe my favorite men were here. I was so happy to see them. "Oh my god Opie!" I jumped at Opie and hugged him, not wanting to let go. I missed my best friend so much.
"Baby girl, you come into town and don't stop by?" Tigs looked at me sternly. "Gemma told me she saw you yesterday at the grocery store, when she was with Wendy."
I was a little shocked by that. I hadn't even thought that the woman with Gemma was Jax's wife. "I'm sorry… I was going to come by the clubhouse today. I was actually just getting ready."
"Good, I'm sure Piney and Clay would love to see you too." Bobby smiled.
"So who's this?" I pointed to a very cute Hispanic guy. He had a Mohawk and tattoos on each side of the Mohawk.
"Hi I'm Juice" He held out his hand, but I hugged him. If he was SAMCRO he was my family too.
"I'm Zoey" I smiled as my cheeks burned.
"I know… I've heard a lot about you." Juice smiled shyly.
"I hope it was all good things." I giggled as I looked to Opie.
"Yeah, since you were such a good kid." Opie joked.
We sat at the kitchen table and talked for a little while. They waited while I changed and got ready to go to the clubhouse. I was a little nervous about being around Gemma since she knew about Jax and me in the past.
I grabbed my purse and my keys as we head out to the drive way which had my car and four motorcycles. As we walked toward my car Tigs stopped and looked at my car.
"Z, you have four flat tires." He looked puzzled. He bent down and started looking closer at the tires. "They've been slashed." He pointed to the slash marks.
"Who would do that?" I tried to think of enemies but I had only been in town a few days and no one really knew I was here. Then I wondered if Gemma would have done this, but I don't think she would since that would mean taking my car to TM.
"We can take you to the clubhouse and send Lowell to flatbed it to the shop." Opie looked around my car.
"Thanks" I pulled out my sunglasses from the counsel of the car. "Juice, can I ride with you? I don't know if I trust them to give me a ride." I giggled.
"Yeah sure" Juice smiled and blushed.
I put on my sunglasses and the helmet Juice handed me. He even took my purse and put it in his saddle bag so I wouldn't lose it on the ride. I hopped on the bike and wrapped my arms around his waist. Opie shook his head with a chuckle before starting his bike. The ride was nice and I remembered the last time I was on a bike. It was with Jax when we rode out to a wooded park. We ended up making love on the bike. Now I had to get over Jax. I thought Juice might help me do that.
We pulled into the parking lot of Teller-Marrow Auto Repairs and the SAMCRO clubhouse. Jax was just parking his bike as Juice backed into his spot. Jax looked surprised. Tigs helped me off the bike and I handed the helmet back to Juice.
"Thanks for the ride." I gave Juice my flirty smile.
"If you need a ride home let me know." Juice pulled my purse out of his saddle bag and handed it to me.
"Ok, thanks" I really like how cute and charming Juice was. I turned around to find Tigs and saw Jax. He looked upset. "Tigs where is Lowell?"
"The tow trucks not here so I am sure he is out on a tow." Tigs put his arm around me and turned to walk me toward the clubhouse. "We can tell him when he gets back. Until then, Juice can be your personal chauffeur."
Tigs, Bobby, Opie, and I walked into the clubhouse. Juice went to let Gemma know I needed my car towed as soon as Lowell got a chance. When I walked into the clubhouse, it was like nothing had changed. Everyone was there and I was so happy to see everyone. Clay, Happy, Chibs, and Piney were sitting at the bar drinking coffee. A few girls were cleaning up around the place. A thin strawberry blonde kid was behind the bar stocking the alcohol.
"So it is true, Zoey finally came home." Clay got up and hugged me tightly. "We have missed you baby girl."
All the guys had called me baby girl since I was little. They all treated me like a daughter and I loved all of them for being my family. Clay was always acting like a father to me. He always told me if he ever had a daughter he hoped she would be just like me. Clay, Tigs, Bobby, and Chibs taught me everything a girl should know, including how to do minor work to my car. Tigs wanted to teach me how to ride a motorcycle when I got old enough but by then I had to move away.
"I'm glad to be home." I smiled at Clay.
"It is really good to see you baby girl." Happy was next to hug me.
"Wow Happy you're a redwood now?" I pointed to his patch. Happy had mostly been nomad while I was growing up but he was around a lot.
"Yeah, this is my family now." He chuckled.
Piney was on oxygen now and didn't move very well so I went to him to give him a hug. "I'm glad your back." He smiled briefly.
Lastly was Chibs, he hugged me and looked at me. "Look at you all grown up." I loved Chibs' Irish accent. I could listen to him talk for hours. "You are a gorgeous woman."
"Thanks Chibs" I blushed.
As I looked around the room at my extended family, my eyes locked onto my father. I stared at him for a long moment. I wondered if I had the courage enough to say something now or if I should wait. The more I thought about it, the more I didn't want to ruin this day right now. Everything was going pretty well now. Except for Jax who sat at a table not saying a word; I could feel his eyes on me.
I walked over to the bar and sat on the stool. "So you're the prospect?"
"Yeah, I'm half sack." He moved closer to me. "Can I get you something to drink?"
"Coke" I ordered and I had to ask. "Why do they call you half sack?"
Half Sack, Kip, grabbed a can of coke and opened it for me. "I was a soldier in Iraq; well there was a bombing and I lost one of my balls." He was so blunt and honest about it that I couldn't even laugh.
"Wow, I'm sorry." I wasn't quite sure what to say. He just smiled and went back to stocking the bar.
"So how long are you here for?" Clay sat on the stool next to me.
"I'm not sure. There are a few things I need to get done at my mom's house before I sell it. Then I'm most likely going to head back to LA." I lied but no one seemed to notice.
"You can't move back to LA. You came back, you can't just leave again." Opie protested.
"I don't know what I want to do yet. We will see in time." I took a sip of my soda than looked to Jax. He had his head down and looked upset. "So what has everyone been up to?"
We sat around and talked for a while. Opie told me that he had married his high school sweetheart Donna and had two kids. Clay and Gemma were about to celebrate their ten-year wedding anniversary. Everyone else was pretty much the same. Juice and I flirted from time to time. Each time we did I would glance at Jax and he would look angry or jealous.
Jax stayed quiet; he was beginning to worry me. I never wanted him to hate me but I just couldn't be with him if he were married. I knew the club had certain rules which allowed the guys to cheat on their wives. The rule was what happens on a run or at a club party stays there, including any sexual activity. I still couldn't do that. If I was going to be with Jax I need all of him to myself. As much as I loved him, which was more than I could explain, I couldn't be his secret.
