Roger Klotz ran out of the park and into his mansion.
"Momomomom!" he shouted.
"What is it, honey?" asked his mom, who was washing dishes in their big-ass sink.
"There was this giant yellow dog in the park," panted Roger, "and it was TALKING! Then I punched it in the nose and it was crying!"
"Honey, you're probably getting sick and hallucinating. You should go to bed. Dogs don't have human vocal cords."
"But I..." he tried to protest.
"No buts." Mrs. Klotz grabbed him by the hand and put him to bed. "You want your bear to make it better?"
While she was tucking him in, Roger looked out the window and saw Doug and Skeeter walking down the street outside.
"Nooooooooooo!" Roger drew the shades and knocked the teddy bear out of his mom's hand. She just shrugged, and walked out of the room.
Roger opened the window and yelled, "You weren't supposed to see that!"
"Huh?!" Doug was puzzled.
"Um...bye, Roger! *Honk-honk!*" Skeeter waved as they turned the corner.
Mrs. Klotz went back downstairs to wash dishes in the kitchen. Suddenly, she heard a voice...
"No one loves me!"
She ran to the living room window and looked out.
There, walking down the street, was the dog Roger described, trotting down the street with a bandaged nose.
"AAAAAHHHHH!" Mrs. Klotz shrieked. The window almost went to powder, and a nearby vase cracked down the middle.
"Then...My little boy was right!"
Doug walked home with Porkchop. He didn't see the dog talk since it ran over him and knocked the wind out of him. It took a few minutes just for him to get up. He did hear everything though, but thought Roger was harassing a girl. But why did he tell his cat to run after that? It was probably because he got caught by an adult. Doug walked up the driveway to sit on the stoop.
Then the dog from the park walked up the driveway and sat next to him. So now Doug was flanked by canines.
For a few minutes, there was silence, with Doug smiling at Porkchop and the other dog and them flashing one back at him.
Then the yellow dog pushed the door open and walked inside. Porkchop followed, and now it was just Doug. Then he went inside and went upstairs to his room.
Mr. Funnie was was sitting on the couch reading the paper. Then Porkchop jumped on the couch and began to lick his face. He pushed him off the couch and went back to his newspaper.
A few minutes later, a big yellow dog with spots on its back hopped onto the couch and curled up on top of Mr. Funnie, who felt something on his lap, crushing him. He put down the paper again and walked the big girl outside, patting it on the head before the front door.
"Dooooouuuuuug!" he called up the stairwell. "Did you leave the front door open again!?"
Doug didn't hear him because Porkchop was in his room again, bouncing around to "Doin' the Dog."
Doug's parents were supposed to get him and Judy to go to the store today, but they forgot to remind them, so now they were fixing a quick supper of Granny's Alphabet Soup.
The golden retriever/pit bull(?), still waiting outside on the front porch, heard the distinct sound of alphabet soup pouring coming from inside and began to somewhat violently scratch on the door.
Mrs. Funnie got the soup out of the microwave and ran to the door.
"What's going on out here?!"
The big dog tried to utter something with the bandages tied tight around its muzzle, but it came out muffled. Mrs. Funnie thought it was just a whimper, and opened the door.
She was surprised when a dog with an hurt nose scrambled into the house into the kitchen.
"Heyyyyyyyyy!" exclaimed Judy, who was in the kitchen with her parents. "Poor thing!" she said, taking the bandages off the dog. "How did you get here?"
The dog opened her mouth and took a deep breath...
Meanwhile, Doug was writing Quailman comics and Porkchop was watching him, finally calmed down for the night...
"AHHHHHH!"
Doug heard the screams coming from downstairs and went down to the kitchen.
