Please be advised I am not an Addison fan. There will never be a story I write with Addison shown in a favorable light. This story is not for Addison fans, and she will probably be gone before the 5th chapter. I still haven't decided on pairings, it looks like the main pairing will be Meredith and Derek, but don't count on it!

BTW, I don't own Grey's Anatomy, I just wish I did!

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Meredith is in her bedroom when Cristina finds her. Looking around Cristina has noticed a change in Meredith's room, her dresser has been moved to the other wall and in front of her bed is a tv stand with a high-definition flat screen tv and a dvd player. Playing on the tv is one of her mother's surgeries. Meredith is in bed surrounded by medical journals, books, notepads, pens, and pencils. "Ahhhh Mer, what is all this?" Cristina asks. "Research." Meredith replied. "You changed your room around, bought a new tv, and all this stuff for research?" Cristina questioned. Meredith looks at Cristina, this is her person, and she thinks she'll understand. "I had a friend transfer some of my mom's surgery tapes to dvd. My mother had tapes from all specialties not just hers in more boxes I found while cleaning out her office which is now my office. I decided to not let Derek and Addison's problems affect me anymore, I've decided to not let Derek affect me anymore, and absolutely nothing is going to stop me from becoming a kick ass surgeon or anything else I want to do in my life!" Meredith exclaimed. Cristina looks at her throws her hands in the air and shouts, "YES!" She then jumps in the bed and asks, "so what are we watching?" "The Grey Method," Meredith says as Cristina's eyes widened in shock and don't leave the screen until the dvd is finished. Once the dvd is finished Meredith goes over to take it out of the player, smirks at Christina, retrieves a key from her nightstand, goes back to her tv stand, and unlocks a cabinet at the bottom. Before Cristina can utter a word Meredith pulls out three binders of different sizes and turns them over to face Cristina. The largest binder is labeled GENERAL, the medium-sized binder is labeled MISC, and the smallest binder is labeled CARDIO. Inside each binder are sleeves filled with dvds. Meredith looks at her and says, "these aren't even half my mother's tapes, these are just the more interesting ones. I'll get the rest of them transferred to dvd later, however, no one else is to know about the dvds, they are not to leave this room without me knowing, and they are not to leave this house EVER!" Meredith smirks at Cristina before continuing, "wait until I finish with the office, it will also have a tv and dvd player. I am going to set it up like my own miniature skills lab, where I'll be able to practice surgical procedures, study, and do more research. It will be my own little piece of happiness!" Cristina looks at Meredith pushes play on the cd/clock/radio on Meredith's nightstand and once the music starts playing her and Meredith have a dance party.

A couple of minutes later, Izzie is at Meredith's bedroom door and asks, "what's going on" Meredith looks at her and says, "dance party." "Cool. Oh, hey Mer, when did you get the tv, and why did you need a tv for your room? With as much time as we spend at the hospital you're never going to be able to watch it." Izzie states. Meredith looks at Cristina and they both look back at Izzie, and at the same time Meredith says, "just because," while Cristina says, "no reason." Then Meredith and Christina look at each other and start laughing. Izzie looks at both women who are closer than sisters and old jealousies ignite about being left out and not being a part of their secret language. She doesn't understand how and why Meredith and Cristina are so close, Cristina doesn't even live here. Izzie storms off to her room as Meredith closes and locks her bedroom door. Her and Christina fall on the bed laughing like schoolgirls.

Meredith is in her bedroom when Cristina finds her. Looking around Cristina has noticed a change in Meredith's room, her dresser has been moved to the other wall and in front of her bed is a tv stand with a high-definition flat screen tv and a dvd player. Playing on the tv is one of her mother's surgeries. Meredith is in bed surrounded by medical journals, books, notepads, pens, and pencils. "Ahhhh Mer, what is all this?" Cristina asks. "Research." Meredith replied. "You changed your room around, bought a new tv, and all this stuff for research?" Cristina questioned. Meredith looks at Cristina, this is her person, and she thinks she'll understand. "I had a friend transfer some of my mom's surgery tapes to dvd. My mother had tapes from all specialties not just hers in more boxes I found while cleaning out her office which is now my office. I decided to not let Derek and Addison's problems affect me anymore, I've decided to not let Derek affect me anymore, and absolutely nothing is going to stop me from becoming a kick ass surgeon or anything else I want to do in my life!" Meredith exclaimed. Cristina looks at her throws her hands in the air and shouts, "YES!" She then jumps in the bed and asks, "so what are we watching?" "The Grey Method," Meredith says as Cristina's eyes widened in shock and don't leave the screen until the dvd is finished. Once the dvd is finished Meredith goes over to take it out of the player, smirks at Christina, retrieves a key from her nightstand, goes back to her tv stand, and unlocks a cabinet at the bottom. Before Cristina can utter a word Meredith pulls out three binders of different sizes and turns them over to face Cristina. The largest binder is labeled GENERAL, the medium-sized binder is labeled MISC, and the smallest binder is labeled CARDIO. Inside each binder are sleeves filled with dvds. Meredith looks at her and says, "these aren't even half my mother's tapes, these are just the more interesting ones. I'll get the rest of them transferred to dvd later, however, no one else is to know about the dvds, they are not to leave this room without me knowing, and they are not to leave this house EVER!" Meredith smirks at Cristina before continuing, "wait until I finish with the office, it will also have a tv and dvd player. I am going to set it up like my own miniature skills lab, where I'll be able to practice surgical procedures, study, and do more research. It will be my own little piece of happiness!" Cristina looks at Meredith pushes play on the cd/clock/radio on Meredith's nightstand and once the music starts playing her and Meredith have a dance party.

A couple of minutes later, Izzie is at Meredith's bedroom door and asks, "what's going on" Meredith looks at her and says, "dance party." "Cool. Oh, hey Mer, when did you get the tv, and why did you need a tv for your room? With as much time as we spend at the hospital you're never going to be able to watch it." Izzie states. Meredith looks at Cristina and they both look back at Izzie, and at the same time Meredith says, "just because," while Cristina says, "no reason." Then Meredith and Christina look at each other and start laughing. Izzie looks at both women who are closer than sisters and old jealousies ignite about being left out and not being a part of their secret language. She doesn't understand how and why Meredith and Cristina are so close, Cristina doesn't even live here. Izzie storms off to her room as Meredith closes and locks her bedroom door. Her and Christina fall on the bed laughing like schoolgirls.

Meredith is in her bedroom when Cristina finds her. Looking around Cristina has noticed a change in Meredith's room, her dresser has been moved to the other wall and in front of her bed is a tv stand with a high-definition flat screen tv and a dvd player. Playing on the tv is one of her mother's surgeries. Meredith is in bed surrounded by medical journals, books, notepads, pens, and pencils. "Ahhhh Mer, what is all this?" Cristina asks. "Research." Meredith replied. "You changed your room around, bought a new tv, and all this stuff for research?" Cristina questioned. Meredith looks at Cristina, this is her person, and she thinks she'll understand. "I had a friend transfer some of my mom's surgery tapes to dvd. My mother had tapes from all specialties not just hers in more boxes I found while cleaning out her office which is now my office. I decided to not let Derek and Addison's problems affect me anymore, I've decided to not let Derek affect me anymore, and absolutely nothing is going to stop me from becoming a kick ass surgeon or anything else I want to do in my life!" Meredith exclaimed. Cristina looks at her throws her hands in the air and shouts, "YES!" She then jumps in the bed and asks, "so what are we watching?" "The Grey Method," Meredith says as Cristina's eyes widened in shock and don't leave the screen until the dvd is finished. Once the dvd is finished Meredith goes over to take it out of the player, smirks at Christina, retrieves a key from her nightstand, goes back to her tv stand, and unlocks a cabinet at the bottom. Before Cristina can utter a word Meredith pulls out three binders of different sizes and turns them over to face Cristina. The largest binder is labeled GENERAL, the medium-sized binder is labeled MISC, and the smallest binder is labeled CARDIO. Inside each binder are sleeves filled with dvds. Meredith looks at her and says, "these aren't even half my mother's tapes, these are just the more interesting ones. I'll get the rest of them transferred to dvd later, however, no one else is to know about the dvds, they are not to leave this room without me knowing, and they are not to leave this house EVER!" Meredith smirks at Cristina before continuing, "wait until I finish with the office, it will also have a tv and dvd player. I am going to set it up like my own miniature skills lab, where I'll be able to practice surgical procedures, study, and do more research. It will be my own little piece of happiness!" Cristina looks at Meredith pushes play on the cd/clock/radio on Meredith's nightstand and once the music starts playing her and Meredith have a dance party.

A couple of minutes later, Izzie is at Meredith's bedroom door and asks, "what's going on" Meredith looks at her and says, "dance party." "Cool. Oh, hey Mer, when did you get the tv, and why did you need a tv for your room? With as much time as we spend at the hospital you're never going to be able to watch it." Izzie states. Meredith looks at Cristina and they both look back at Izzie, and at the same time Meredith says, "just because," while Cristina says, "no reason." Then Meredith and Christina look at each other and start laughing. Izzie looks at both women who are closer than sisters and old jealousies ignite about being left out and not being a part of their secret language. She doesn't understand how and why Meredith and Cristina are so close, Cristina doesn't even live here. Izzie storms off to her room as Meredith closes and locks her bedroom door. Her and Christina fall on the bed laughing like schoolgirls.

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Addison pulls up to the trailer and sees Derek grilling trout while drinking a beer. She rolls her eyes internally thinking how nothing phases him. He looks at her and says, "your clothes are packed and your suitcase is right inside the door. Please collect the rest of your things and be gone within the hour." Addison looks shocked and yells, "wait we're not going to talk about this, I'm just out, you're not even going to give me a chance to explain!" Derek looks at her and in a voice normally used to discuss the weather says,"there's nothing to talk about, we're done, we were done before I left New York, before I even came to Seattle, and it was a huge mistake to try and fix what was broken beyond repair." Addison desperately replies, " no Derek this is not over, we can't be over, we can work this out, what we need is a fresh start. Let's move somewhere new, somewhere without Mark or Meredith. You've forgiven me for Mark and I've forgiven you for Meredith. " Addison is looking directly into Derek's eyes and is surprised and hopeful by the level of emotion now present, until Derek speaks, "Meredith has nothing to do with this, you do not need to forgive me for her, she is the victim here. I lied to her, I betrayed her, and I'm the one who needs her forgiveness." Addison stumbles back, angered by his words. All she can think about is he chose her, she's his wife, Meredith is nothing and he should be focused on her. Her anger is overshadowing the pain she's feeling by the level of emotion he is not only feeling but showing towards another woman, not for her not for his wife. She cries out, "are you kidding me with this Derek. I am your wife we have been married for more than eleven years. Are you telling me you're going to throw it all away, throw away everything that we have, everything that we worked for, for a fling?" Angered by her words and fed up with the double standard, Derek throws back at her, "I guess you forgot all that when you fell in bed with Mark, or when you continued being with Mark, going so far as to getting pregnant with his baby. I guess you remembered you had a husband that you had been married to for over eleven years right around the time you decided to have an abortion." Addison is stunned silent by his words. He doesn't know how she reached that decision and how she agonized over what she did and how she thought it was for the best. She couldn't have Mark's baby. Mark wasn't a great guy, he wasn't the one she wanted to start a family with. She realized then that she needed to be with Derek and that it was Derek she wanted to be with and start a family with.

Derek is exasperated. He looks at Addison and sees she just doesn't get it. He's changed, it was a change he desperately needed. She needs to know the truth, he doesn't want to hurt her, but he has to be honest. "I'm sorry Addison, I really am. I'm sorry for giving you false hope, I'm sorry for not letting you know my feelings, but Meredith was not a fling. I fell in love with her, and I'm still in love with her. I haven't been in love with you since before I left New York, even before you slept with Mark. Part of me will always love you, but we're over. I've signed the divorce papers, and have forwarded them to my lawyer. They will forward them to your lawyer, and once you sign them, we can be done and move on like we should have in the first place. Addison stumbles and falls back into the grass. Derek approaches her to help her up, but Addison puts her hand up to stop his advance. "Stay the HELL away from me, I don't need your help!" She yells. Addison gets up, brushes herself off, goes into the trailer, grabs her things, and leaves. Before she gets into her car she throws Derek a glare and says, "screw you Derek Shepherd." She gets in her car and speeds off. About a mile away from the trailer, she pulls over, unable to see through her tears. In desperate need of a friend, she picks up her cell phone and dials a familiar number. Once the person on the other end picks up, she cries out, "Nancy, he told me it's over, what am I going to do?"