Disclaimer: I don't own High School Musical……shocked no?
A/N: Special thanks to:
ZacEfronLuver
pollypocket911
MyFictionalAnnihilation
Mondler4EvEr
Mikki Yo
xxThisLoVeDiEs2Dayxx
Joyful
You guys make my day! Much Love!
CARING
For the next hour and a half Troy sat uncomfortably in his physics class wondering why in the hell what had happened to Evans was actually bothering him. Since when did he care? He had never really talked to Ryan. They weren't friends, God, they weren't even acquaintances, yet there was this nagging guilt that seemed to be ever present in the pit of his stomach. Wait, why should he feel guilty at all? It wasn't as if he had written the damn word…….but of course, he knew who did.
That was enough reason to feel guilty in itself, but what was he supposed to do about it? Rat out his friends for the sake of helping someone who wasn't his friend at all. Like hell he would. No, telling was not an option. It's never an option. He repeated over and over in his head trying to suppress the feeling of guilt by telling himself that ratting out his buddies would just make matters worse. Well it would, wouldn't? if he told the principal then they would get suspended, get incredibly pissed off, beat the holy living shit out of Evans for payback and probably disown Troy in the process. It was a lose, lose situation. He was doing the right thing by keeping quiet. It was so blindingly clear. Then why did he still feel guilty?
He didn't even have to ask himself why. All along Troy knew exactly why he felt guilty. In the beginning he hadn't cared. When he had heard his friends planning it in the locker room he hadn't cared. When he saw what they had done to Ryan's locker he hadn't cared. All that time he hadn't given a damn at all, but when he looked into Ryan's eyes, just one look into those desperate blue pools and not caring had become just a part of his imagination. That's why he was sitting here squirming in his chair trying to convince himself that he shouldn't feel guilty because Troy Bolton did give a damn when it was all said and done. Troy didn't hurt people, it just wasn't in him to do it and Ryan Evans had definitely been hurt so he couldn't help but care.
At this point in his thoughts Troy heard the bell ring. The day was over…thank God. Troy breathed a sigh of relief as he gathered up his books and papers. He really needed to get the hell out of here. However, nature always seems to call at inopportune times so he decided to stop by the bathroom before heading out to his car. He went to the one on the second floor. It was in the back of the old part of East High and most people didn't even know it existed.
As soon as Troy set one foot into the restroom he wished that he had just held it instead. It took him a split second to hear the muffled sobbing. Another split second to hear a small gasp and the sniffing that comes when you try to stop crying, and yet another second to decided that he was not going to walk right back out the door.
with a strong obligation taking hold of him Troy walked over to one of the stalls and lightly pushed it open without even knocking first. There, sitting with his legs pulled up to his chest was the tear-stained, red faced Ryan Evans.
"What the fuck do you want?" Ryan said with shaking malice when he had found his voice again.
"What are you doing here, Evans?" Troy asked trying not to sound as concerned as he actually was and failing miserably.
"I'm knitting a goddamn sweater!" Came the biting reply. When Ryan saw Troy's brow furrow he said in a softened voice, "Just get out of here. Go tell all your friends that you saw the fag on the bathroom floor crying like a little girl. I'm sure that'll get a good laugh." Ryan said bitterly. Troy didn't respond to this, he just knelt down until he was eye level with Ryan. "What are you doing?"
"Not walking away." Troy replied after some consideration.
"Just leave Bolton. Please God, just leave." Ryan pleaded with heart-breaking desperation. He couldn't let Troy see him like this. He couldn't let the person who had drove him to tell in the first place see him trembling and frightened and desperate. He just couldn't bare it.
"I can't" Troy said, he didn't know why he had said it, it just came out. Realization dawned on Ryan's pale features.
"Did you do it?" He asked this as if he were inquiring about the weather. Troy scooted away involuntarily not expecting this type of a question.
"What? No! Of course I didn't do it!"
"But you know who did, don't you?"
With one simple word all of Troy's defenses were ruined. "Yes."
"But you aren't going to tell are you?"
"No, I'm not."
"Good." Troy was a little taken aback by this. He thought that it was good that he was refusing to tell? This doesn't make sense. Upon seeing the confusion on Troy's face, Ryan added, "At first I just wanted to be seen but now I just want to be left alone."
"I'm afraid I don't understand."
"No, you wouldn't, would you…" And then he looked Troy directly in the eye and he said in a cracked voice that was barely above a whisper. "Sometimes you do it just so people will notice and then when they finally do you wish that you had just kept on drowning instead." The silence that followed was devastating. Troy didn't know why he did it but before he could stop himself he placed a light hand on Ryan's shoulder. At first Ryan was startled by this and he jumped slightly, but then, whether it was from the warmth of Troy's hand or just the weight of it all, he let out a strangled sob. Before either of them knew what was happening Ryan flung his arms around Troy. Troy held him with awkward hands and patted his back stiffly, unsure of what to do. When Ryan began to tremble even harder, Troy felt a sharp, unwelcome pain in his heart and as he had known all along. In one day, Troy Bolton cared too fucking much.
