A/N: MAJOR NOTE THAT WAS FORGOTTEN IN THE LAST CHAPTER: EVERYTHING WAS PUSHED BACK A YEAR. SO FIRST YEAR OF GLEE CLUB WAS FRESHMAN YEAR FOR KURT, SANTANA, BRITTANY, RACHEL, FINN, PUCK, MERCEDES, AND YOU KNOW THE REST. EVERYONE ELSE WAS IN EIGHT GRADE, BUT WERE ALLOWED TO JOIN DUE TO HOW SMALL THE GROUP WAS. ARTIE AND TINA ARE NOW THE SAME AGE AS KURT AND MERCEDES(to explain how they were able to be one of the first five to sign up.) This means Season 3 is actually junior year. Now, this is NEEDED for the plot, due to a few people who graduated that need to be in school still.)
I see so many people making Kurt's Cheerio outfit seem so sexy. I wanted to tone it down to look a bit like S1, but like a size smaller on the pants. So he can still hide behind it like he did the layers.
I'm gonna play nice and tell a bit of a spoiler that plays into what happened in "Sadie Hawkins": Trent will play a major role in this story.
The song in this chapter is There is Life by Alison Krauss(from Bambi 2) sung by Kurt and Elizabeth
Italics are song lyrics, and flashbacks.
Chapter 2: For it's out of the darkness that we learn to see.
"I'm not so sure about this San, what is everyone gonna say?"
Santana sighed as she leaned against the stall door. She and Brittany were waiting for Kurt to change into his Cheerio outfit. It wasn't anything special, similar to the outfit he wore two years ago. The shirt and pants were just a bit tighter, nothing more. Coach Sylvester didn't want him showing off everything he has, and no way in hell was anyone going to be leering at her 'nephew'. She made it acceptably- by Burt's standards- modest yet flattering.
"Kurtie, at least you aren't in a skirt that leaves nothing to the imagination and a shirt that makes your boobs looks smaller than they are." Santana retorted, trying to open the door from the outside. She jumped back in surprise as it swung open when Kurt undid the latch. "See? It's perfect. You can breathe in it, yet it leaves people wondering."
Kurt grimaced. He didn't want anyone wondering anything, it was why he always wore long sleeves and pants, or the occasional skirt that reached mid-thigh with leggings that ended off about three inches into knee-high boots. He took great pride in his fashion, and how it showed off nothing.
"Come on, wipe that look off of your face." Santana said in a softer tone. "You look amazing in it just like you did before."
Kurt couldn't help but smile.
Brittany squeaked and hugged the boy close, nuzzling into his arm. "My kitten's back!"
"I thought I was a dolphin?" Kurt pouted.
"Nope." Brittany shook her head, her blonde ponytail flipping with the movement. "Lord Tubbington really likes you, so you're a kitten. They can be gay raccoons."
Santana snickered. "Just leave it. Come on, we have a school to impress."
She linked arms with Kurt, and watched Brittany closely as the girl skipped ahead of them. Together, the three of them met up with two other cheerleaders, and Becky.
"Hi girls, Becky." Kurt said warmly.
"Looking good Kurt." The two girls said, flashing him flirty smiles. It was all just pretend, of course. A show that Sylvester told them to put on. The girls were all friends with Kurt, and willing to help him out.
"Coach wants to see you after homeroom." Becky informed him. Kurt nodded, offering his other arm to the girl, and continued walking when she did. The two other girls followed behind.
"Aren't we a strange group." Kurt joked. "Doesn't Coach usually put us in groups of three?"
"Usually." One of the girls, Sammy said. "But it's your first day, and she doesn't know how… they will react."
"She wants you safe." The other, Kate added. "So you'll have three of us with you at a time. At least until next week."
Kurt sighed. The protection wasn't really needed. He would talk to Coach about it after homeroom.
After homeroom, Kurt found himself spending first, second, and third hour in the cheerleading coach's office, lying down on the long but thin couch in the room. He wasn't asleep, just thinking.
"Aunt Sue," He began hesitantly, "do I still have to be in Glee?"
"I told you yesterday that you did not." She replied, not looking up from the paper she was filling out. "I don't trust Shuester to keep you safe enough."
Kurt nodded, looking towards the door as Becky walked in. It was passing period now, and in two minutes, fourth hour would begin. As he sat up, Sue fixed him with a look that told him to lie back down.
"Your father told me about the nightmares. You're not going to class today. After school Sandbags and Blondie are taking you to that club meeting, and explaining that you three are no longer a part of them. That will be stressful enough without classes."
Kurt lay back down. "What about homework?"
"Coach had me take it to your teachers and get your new work." Becky piped up, sitting in the chair next to Kurt.
Kurt gave the girl a warm smile. "Thanks Becky." He always liked the other cheerleader, even when he wasn't on the squad. Sure, some people may say that she had a bitchy attitude, or try and make fun of her for being different. But all Kurt could see is a sweet girl whose attitude was a defense, just like his. His mother taught him how to see past all sorts of things, and she could never stress enough how important it was to see past mental and physical differences.
It was because she herself was a bit different. Kurt didn't know it back then, but when he was ten his father explained how his mother was almost classified as bi-polar. Kurt didn't understand it until he was fifteen, he thought bi-polar was just a bunch of mood swings and madness. But after researching it, he found it was more. It explained why she always pressed Kurt to be nice to everyone.
Except for bullies. Her explanation for dealing with them was to beat them down however possible.
Kurt pulled out his phone, there was no use in just lying around anymore. He saw that quite a few people had texted him, and not just the New Directions. The occasional text from a warbler or two were mixed in there. Nick wanted to know what happened, Jeff wondered if he was alright.
And Wes, strangely, texted him Warbler practice times.
You do know I'm not a Warbler anymore, correct? Or did David finally get a hold of that gavel and hit you on the head with it? Kurt texted back.
The other texts from Warblers were just ones he expected, different hellos or replies to earlier texts. One was from Chandler, once again apologizing for causing trouble. One from his dad, reminding him to pick up his prescription- Sue had done that earlier without Kurt knowing- and that he would be working late at the garage.
Finn texted him, making sure he was ok, and Mike sent his e-mail a file of the notes in their shared classes. The two boys being the only ones, besides Brittany and Santana, to still be his friend after the split with Blaine.
And speaking of his ex, there were quite a few messages from him too, just formal stuff like Kurt getting his stuff back from Blaine, bringing whatever of Blaine's things that were at his house to school for him, saying he could keep the ring.
The ring.
Kurt's heart stopped for a moment as he thought of the ring and the promises that came with it. He still had the ring on a chain around his neck, in a small plastic case to keep it safe. It was tucked under his shirt, but he brought it out and held it tightly in his hand as he typed out a sharp reply. I'll burn the damned thing before I ever think of keeping it, better yet, I'll let Sophie have it.
Sophie was Coach Sylvester's newest Cheerio, a fairly large Rottweiler, with a beautiful coat and muscles that could make Puckerman tremble in fear. She was currently asleep under the couch that Kurt occupied. The countertenor fumbled with the chain around his neck for a moment before decided. He unclipped it, opening up the little box it was holding and pulling out the ring. 'I don't love you anymore. How can I when you trust a few stupid messages over me?' He whistled for Sophie before dropping the ring on the floor. Getting rid of the last bit of his relationship with Blaine that he still held on to.
The last hour of school seemed to just drag by, even when Santana and Brittany came in to keep him company. They were greeted by the amusing sight of Kurt being crushed into the couch by Sophie, who was licking the boy's face. Kurt was laughing and trying to block the dog with his arms, but she would only put a light, playful pressure on them with her jaws when he did. Their playing stopped as Santana and Brittany drug the dog off of him. The final bell rang, and Kurt sobered. Any evidence of playfulness was gone from his face, replaced with the ice mask he was so well-known for.
"Come on, let's get going." Santana said, wrapping one arm around Kurt's waist. Brittany led them to the choir room, and Kurt couldn't help but notice the differences in his girl from the last time he was this close to her. She seemed more graceful, her steps flowing like she calculated them evenly, unlike her usual bounce. Her back was straight, a bit tense. Kurt was sure that if she had animal ears, they would be alert.
'That's what's different.' Kurt thought. 'Is she having the same dreams as me? She seems more cat-like.'
Brittany tensed even more as they came closer to the choir room. Voices could be heard coming from the usually silent room. Even when they were singing, the walls were thick enough to hold their voices inside. Now though, shouting escaped the room like thunder. Kurt could recognize the voices, but didn't believe them to be real.
"It's all your fault!"
"My fault?! You're the one who broke him!"
"If you had just died-"
Kurt ran ahead of Brittany and slammed the door open at the sharp retort that left- 'Sebastian?'s- mouth. He stopped in the doorway.
Chandler was standing tall next to Dave, who was recoiling back at Sebastian's voice. Next to the smirking Warbler, was Blaine. Their fingers entwined together.
"Kurt!" Chandler was the first to speak to the newcomers. Dave whipped his head around to look at the cheerio, blinking in surprise.
"You're a Cheerio again?"
Kurt's eyes weren't on them though. Santana and Brittany came to stand next to him as he looked at Blaine, the other boy not meeting his gaze.
"So, I'm the cheater here?" Kurt found his voice, an icy sound. His heart threatened to beat out of his chest, and his mind screamed at him to get away. Something inside him though made him stay put, made him face his recent ex-boyfriend and the meerkat instead of turning to the snarling creature he knew stood behind him. "Or am I just that forgettable?"
"Where do you think he's been this past month? Certainly not in your bed." Sebastian smirked. The image Kurt's mind gave him, the creature, with the same eyes as Sebastian's, the same scent as the forest.
Suddenly, he wasn't in the choir room. He was back in the dream. The creature was so close to getting him, but this time, the other cat wasn't there. There was something else between him and the creature, a heat that threatened to overtake the whole forest. The snarling sounded so much real, almost like, it was coming from him. His vision cleared and he was back in the choir room. He wasn't snarling, but the way that everyone stared at him told him that he was growling. He was facing one of the beasts from his dreams.
The other cat from that dream couldn't save him now.
"So you can sleep with that…that whore. Yet when I text a friend, a friend who is dating my other friend, suddenly I'm public enemy number one?" Kurt's voice never rose from the ice, if anything it gained more frost to it. Even in the waking world, he could feel his tail lashing behind him, the snow-gray ears flatten against light brown hair. "A month, after what he did, after everything-" Kurt took a step forward and Santana rushed up to him.
"Kurt," Chandler took a step towards the boy at the same time as Finn. Mike and Dave stopped them.
"I should've known. But no, I let you play me, like you always have." The growling behind him got louder, and he noticed how Brittany flinched beside him. Maybe they did share the same dreams. There was no time to think about it though. "First Jeremiah, then Rachel, me and Sebastian, who else have you been playing?! Jeff? Nick? Trent? Or did you try and go after Finn?"
"No one." Blaine finally spoke. "And like you can talk! This past month you've been texting Chandler-"
"Because my boyfriend wouldn't even look at me during class!" Kurt's voice finally rose. "Even when we were together, my dear boyfriend turned down sex! Because he was too busy fucking some low-class Paris slut! What's wrong? Too ashamed about it to even break up with me when it first started?"
"He only went to Sebastian because you were ignor-"
"I was not and you know it Rachel!" Kurt wasn't about to let any of them finish even one thought. The creature's jaws were snapping behind him and Brittany was moving closer to him. He had to calm down, if not for his sake, then for Brittany's. He grabbed one of her hands, grounding himself with the simple touch. "If this is how things are going to be, fine. You'll still have twelve members after today. But me, Britt, and San? We quit."
"Coach wants us to stop wasting our talents in this stupid club and use them in a better way." Santana said smugly. "And with Porce back on the team, the Cheerios are the better way."
The girls turned to leave, and Kurt looked at the rest of New Directions. His former friends, all siding with Blaine.
"Think Coach'll let me on the team this time?" Finn whispered, standing beside Kurt suddenly.
"Finn! Mike! Get back over here! We have to practice for Nationals!" Rachel's shrill voice broke the tension.
Mike looked back at Rachel, glaring at the small show choir. "Family comes first." Was the only thing he said before leading Kurt out to follow the girls.
Growling filled the forest, and this time it wasn't from the dog creature. The sun was shining brightly through the trees as Kurt paced along the river. The growling was coming from him, a low sound that was almost feral.
"I should've known that stupid meerkat would invade my nightmares." He spat. The snow-gray tail behind him was lashing with fury. "And to find out that he was cheating all along…rawr!" Kurt yowled, pouncing on a twig like a kit. His claws dug deep into the bark before he jumped away from it. He turned his gaze to the river, a teal-tinted golden color looked back at him. The combination of colors made his eyes seem to glow, much like his glasz ones in his human form.
"Your technique is just like a kittens still."
Kurt tensed at the new voice. It sounded familiar, but the new language was something he was getting used to still, only ever hearing his own meow. It took him a moment to translate what was said, and even longer to notice another cat's reflection from across the river. Warm, gentle eyes glanced at him before returning to the other cat's own reflection. The golden color shone as bright as the sun, with green, blue, and gray flecks highlighting the magnificent color.
"Then again, you haven't been here since you were eight." The cat, a she-cat with light brown fur that blended into a dark black at her paws, ears, and tail, spoke again. It was a bit easier for Kurt to understand, and he realized that it was not a meow this time, but pure English.
"How do you know that?" He asked, backing up a bit away from the river. "Who are you?"
She purred at the smaller cat before answering, "Come on now sweetheart, I know you can use that nose of yours still."
At the mention of his nose, it twitched, and the familiar scent finally hit him. The scent of spring, the scent of lilies and apples and home. His eyes widened, Kurt guessed he could make an owl look normal with his gaze.
Standing in front of him, with tail twitching in amusement and whiskers dancing in the light breeze, was Elizabeth. His mother was here, standing right in front of him. The only difference to be seen was how she was a cat, and somewhat transparent. She was like a ghost, she was a ghost. But when she waded through the water, it formed around her paws like it would his own. The water stained the grass that she touched once she reached the side Kurt was on.
Kurt was frozen. After not seeing her for so long, he had almost forgotten her. But now the memories flooded back, crashing into him worse than any locker shove he had ever received. Her scent was the same, the exact same perfume that had faded some time ago from her dresser. Her eyes were just as warm as he remembered them. "M-Momma…"
"Hello, my darling son." She purred, touching noses with him.
"Is…is it really you?" He couldn't believe this. That his dreams would be so cruel to do this to him.
But was it just a trick? He thought back to that day, how Brittany seemed to react to everything the others couldn't see. If she was here too, why couldn't his mother be?
Even her laugh was the same. "Kurtie," the forest hummed around them. "Would a song prove it to you?"
Kurt nodded numbly.
Elizabeth padded closer to him, giving his cheek a loving lick. "Under the snow, beneath the frozen streams, there is life." Even her singing was just as Kurt remembered. "You'll have to know when nature sleeps she dreams, there is life." Her tail twined with Kurt's as he leaned against her side.
"And the colder the winter, the warmer the spring."
Kurt shivered in the bitter cold as he followed Elizabeth into the house. Even under the designer coat and pants, the five year old was frozen. "Momma, it's too cold!" He complained.
Elizabeth laughed. "Sweetheart, that just means that spring will be warm. And you can play outside more."
"The deeper the sorrow, the more our hearts sing"
Kurt eyes watered as he looked into the hospital room. They weren't allowing him inside, they barely even agreed to his father being in there. He knew what was going on. And even then, he murmured a familiar tune under his breath.
"Even when you can't see it inside everything" Kurt tucked his head under his mother's chin, his ears flattening down as he let out a choked purr.
"There is life" Elizabeth pawed gently at a flower in front of them. It was just a simple purple flower, nothing more. But it was so beautiful to them in that moment.
"After the rain the sun will reappear. There is life"
Elizabeth smiled at her impatient son. The six year old was sitting at the window, waiting for Burt to get home from work so he could show off the new broach that his mother bought him today. The rain pouring down did nothing to damper the boy's excitement as he saw the familiar truck pull into the driveway. As Kurt ran outside to greet his father, the rain stopped and the sun shone out through a break in the clouds.
"After the pain the joy will still be here. There is life."
Elizabeth's death was on a Saturday. The very next day, his grandmother skipped church just to take him to New York for the first time.
Burt's heart attack had paralyzed Kurt, but with Mercedes he had found a new hope, and possibly a new faith in humanity.
Dave's threat, Blaine's saving.
His uncle's remarrying, a new cousin that he already knew as a friend.
Blaine's mistake. And Kurt finding his mother still alive in his dreams.
"For it's out of the darkness that we learn to see." Elizabeth playfully covered Kurt's eyes with one of her paws. Kurt shook his head in laughter, trying to get her paw off of his head.
"And out of the silence that songs come to be. And all that we dream of awaits patently." Her beautiful voice filled the forest, soon joined by another as Kurt finally found his voice.
"There is life, there is life"
Kurt walked into school with a new bounce in his step. He felt invincible, like he could take on the world and win without a scratch. Nothing could hurt him, not even the glares he received as he met up with Mike and Brittany at his locker.
"Well, someone had a good night." Mike joked. "Did Uncle Burt give you a raise at the shop or something? Oh no, don't tell me, you found out what my mom's getting you for your birthday?"
"Neither." Kurt smiled. "Though, if you want to tell me that, I'm not against it." He teased, getting his books from his locker before Brittany knocked them right back in with a tight hug.
"I'm so happy for you kitten." She whispered. "You found your home." Kurt wanted so badly to purr, but he couldn't in the waking world.
Mike grabbed Kurt's books for him as the other boy twirled Brittany in a laughter filled dance, stopping only as Kurt's phone rang. He grabbed it from the pocket of his uniform, noticing it was Wes calling. "Hello?" He asked in confusion.
"Did you get the list?"
"Wes, I'm not a Warbler."
"Not what I asked."
Kurt rolled his eyes. "Wesley, I got your damned list. I also have news that one of your little songbirds was sleeping around with Anderson before he accused me of cheating."
"I knew something was up!" Kurt guessed that Wes was in Trent's dorm room as the boy spoke up. "I'm sorry Kurt, if I knew that was what he was doing I would've said something."
Kurt smiled. Out of all the Warblers, Trent was one of his best friends. Wes was a close second, and both Nick and Jeff held third place. "It's fine Sunny." He laughed. "I don't blame you."
"I expect you here tonight Kurt, tell Burt that you're staying the night."
"Wes, it's only Thursday." There was no way Burt would let him miss school, let alone drive from Dalton to McKinley in the morning.
"I know it is." Wes sighed. "Kurt, just trust me ok? Come spend the night with me and your little marshmallow and Niff."
Now Kurt knew something was up. "How about you tell me what this is about?"
"Kurt, it's in your best interest that you come over so a catty fight doesn't start and we can sort out this furry little problem."
Kurt froze. Wes' words both confused him and confirmed what he had thought before with Brittany. Had the other boy been to the same place he had in his dreams? He must've, that or one of the other Warblers had and they told him. Either way, maybe Wes could explain a bit more about what that place was, and why the dreams and nightmares were happening.
A/N: about the marshmallow when Wes tells Kurt to spend the night, that refers to Trent. He's always been my favorite Warbler right after Kurt, and the recent episode I began to piss my cousin off by referring to Trent as a "cute little marshmallow that I just want to cuddle to death and hide from everything bad in the world". And that came from a cat post on Tumblr with a mother cat and two fluffy white kittens. So Trent is the fluffy little marshmallow that Kurt loves to spoil like a little brother.
So, what do you think about the little twist? With Mike being Kurt's cousin?(just through marriage. His mom married Kurt's uncle) I wanted him to have a bigger role in the story.
