I drove home that night with tears rolling down my face

CHAPTER ONE:

I drove home that night with tears rolling down my face. It was all I could do not to break down and sob right then. I knew I had done the right thing for both Rob and myself. I just didn't think it would hurt so much. My heart was killing me, it ached like a bullet had pierced it and left a gaping hole. Everything around me was hazy, like a dream, all that was clear was the pain searing in my chest, making it hard to breathe. I walked to my apartment in a zombie like trance, not realizing what I was doing until I felt the down feathery pillow under my head. I had changed my clothes and brushed my teeth mechanically.
The tears flowed freely now accompanied by loud sobs that were slightly quieted by my pillow. My whole body shook as I cried. Salty tears soaked my pillow and moistened my cheeks. I cried myself to sleep that night and awoke the next morning feeling exhausted yet with more tears building up. Before I could start again I forced myself out of bed and into the shower.
The warm water felt soothing on my salt stained skin. I savored the warmth knowing the cold would overcome my body soon. Sure enough as soon as I stepped out of the shower it felt like a cold front moved in just over me. It was hard to dress while I shivered but I managed it. Soon I was in my car heading to the twilight set.
I had distracted myself enough in the morning to keep the pain to a minimal but in the car my mind escaped me. The pain throbbed as Rob's hurt face flashed in my mind. I kept breathing but it wasn't easy, with every breath came a sharp stab of pain.
I parked in my usual spot and cut the engine. I didn't want to get out of my car yet, not just becuase it would be even colder outside but because I feared who would be there. I tried to take a deep breath and prepare for this gruesome day but that only caused me so much pain I had to clutch my chest. I sighed and gave up on preparing. As I reached for the door handle someone from outside opened it for me. I had to sheild my eyes from the sun at first but then Rob's gorgeous smile and the rest of his beautiful features came into clear view.
For a brief second the pain stopped and there was no bullet hole because I breathed in his over-whelming scent. The smell reminded me of his lips and the memory brought back the pain which ripped at my heart again...