Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha or Naruto.
The Il-Legitimate Son
6/6/08 – 7/19/08
Minato had been living with his wife in the new mansion for more than a month, and he was still trying to adjust to the new lifestyle. Itachi had been there for less than an hour, and he already looked as comfortable as if he had grown up there his entire life.
Sometimes, he mentally frowned, life just wasn't fair.
"Minato," Kagome frowned warningly – a dangerous tone in her voice, causing him to wince. "Finish your vegetables."
Looking down at his plate, Minato smiled sheepishly when he realized that he had subconsciously pushed all the vegetables to one side of the plate. "Sorry," he mumbled as he shoved a forkful into his mouth, making a face at the healthy taste. How could she eat this stuff? He couldn't understand the appeal, and he probably would never. Ever since he was a little kid, he had been ingrained with the proper habit of avoiding all things green and leafy.
Real shinobis shouldn't eat rabbit food. They should eat ramen, which was instant and clean! Of course, he snorted, he wasn't stupid enough to say those thoughts out loud. His wife would skin him alive.
"No wonder Tou-san said that the standards for choosing Hokages have dropped." Itachi commented out loud, causing Minato to snap out of his inner musings. "Brains are not as important as brawns, I guess."
Minato scowled. Why that little…!
"Hm, your father has a point." Kagome mused, conveniently forgetting that she was married to the current Hokage. "I always thought the standards for choosing Hokages should be altered too. I know that the Hokage should be the strongest man (or woman) in the village, but I think intelligence and wisdom are important aspects to take into account too when the council chooses a leader."
Minato's frowned deepened as he stabbed the carrot with his fork, causing the plate to crack with the force of his strength. "Eh…" He shivered, feeling the force of his wife's glare boring into his forehead.
"Namikaze Minato! Can't you behave yourself for a minute?! Act your age for once, will you? There's a child present! Children are impressionable, you know? What if Itachi sees you as a role model and decides to copy your horrendous manners?" Kagome growled, her eyes blazing with righteous fury.
"Not a chance," Itachi muttered, pinning Minato with a dry look.
"Child?" snorted Minato, disbelief coloring his voice.
The devil's prized spawn was more like it!
"Minato!" Kagome called, gently shaking his shoulders. "I need you to get up."
Opening a bleary eye, he glanced at the clock and checked the calendar. Then, he promptly turned and shoved his head under the covers again. "It's Saturday," he growled when his wife poked him again. "I don't have to go until noon."
"Yes, I know, but I still have to work at the hospital in the morning."
"Ugh...bye?" he asked, hoping that was the answer she was looking for...
Irritated, Kagome promptly pulled the covers down. "Minato! Get up! Now."
...or not.
More frightened than confused, Minato promptly shot up like a bullet when he heard the warning tone in his wife's voice. "Yes?" he squeaked, beginning to fear that he had forgotten (or overlooked) one of his husbandly duties. Was he supposed to walk his wife to work on weekends? But he couldn't remember doing anything like that last time (or the time before that)! Or was that it? Was she mad because –
"Is he always this lazy?" Itachi asked, looking innocently (Pfft, Minato snorted) at Kagome. He was looking into the room, his body half-hidden by the wall – the perfect picture of shy, sweet innocence. Kagome was putty in his hands, but Minato wanted to hurl. That kid was not normal. "I hope I'm not disturbing." Itachi continued, lowered his eyes and peeking at them from behind dark eyelashes. "Does Hokage-sama usually wake up later?"
Kagome flushed, feeling embarrassed on her husband's behalf, which caused her to react without thinking. Dragging her husband out of bed and onto the floor, it took her a second to remember that Minato liked sleeping in the buff.
Minato flushed.
Kagome choked.
Itachi glared.
Minato had the distinct feeling that there was a deeper meaning to that glare. Unwilling (and afraid) to dig deeper into the working of an Uchiha's mind (especially one belonging to a kid as twisted as Itachi), Minato promptly fled to the bathroom and began changing. When he reemerged a minute later, dressed, Kagome was the only one there. Strangely thankful, he released a breath he hadn't realize he had been holding.
However, he found his relief short-lived when Kagome promptly pushed him out of the house. Confused and disoriented, he could only stare at the closed door. What had he missed? Looking down, he looked at the wade of cash she had pushed into his hand. Was he supposed to do grocery?
Before he had time to ask, the door reopened again and Kagome stepped out with Itachi trailing faithfully behind her. Kissing Itachi on the cheek and reminding him to be on his best behavior, she turned towards Minato and announced (rather imperiously), "I'll pick him up from your office around noon. Make sure you pick out some good outfits for him for different occasions." Kissing him on the lips (ignoring his disoriented look), she turned, gave the young Uchiha a hug, and promised to pick him up at noon.
Still flabbergasted, Minato looked helplessly at the devil beside him. He had to go shopping…with him? And why was that brat glaring at him again? What did he do now? Deciding that the kid simply had issues, he turned and growled, "Come on, brat, let's go."
Itachi refused to budge.
"What is it now?" Minato demanded, peeved.
"Hn," Itachi snorted, turning up his nose.
"Well, I don't remember asking you for your opinion." Minato ground out through clenched teeth as he grabbed his arm. Dragging the Uchiha Spawn through the streets, it took him a second to realize that they were the only ones moving on the street. Everyone else had stopped to watch them.
"Uh..." Minato blinked.
The crowd of people blinked back.
Minato blinked again.
Finally, the silence broke.
"Hokage-sama, that is no way to treat your son!" a woman chided, plowing on without stopping. "You may not realize this, Hokage-sama, but that's a form of abuse!"
"Abuse?!" echoed Minato. What?! As if it burned, he immediately released Itachi's wrist. He hadn't meant to hurt the brat! He had just been so irritated, he hadn't... Wait, did she just say –!
"Look," the woman continued, ignoring the alarmed look on his face. Rolling up Itachi's sleeve, she pointed to the ring of dark bruise that was beginning to form there. "I know you're new to this, Minato-sama, but you can't treat your son this way! Even if he was wrong, you should never have never taken his punishment this far!"
"W-Wait…" Minato cried. He's not my –
"Actually, I'm surprised you have a son already, Hokage-sama." another voice piped in. "And five-years-old, nontheless!"
"He's not –"
"He does look a bit like Kagome-sama." echoed another.
"He's actually a –"
"Well, that explains why there always seemed to be an air of forbidden mystery around your relationship with Kagome-sama's. You did, after all, seem to have gotten married out of the blue!"
"W-Wait a minute," Minato choked, feeling distinctly like crying when he found that his voice had been drowned out by the crowd's chatter. Turning helplessly towards the Uchiha Spawn – the source of the gossip – Minato felt his eyebrow twitch when the brat simply gave him a dirty, condescending look…as if…as if he wasn't good enough to be his father!
Of course, not that he wanted to be!
Itachi snorted as if he had heard his thoughts and agreed with it.
Taking a deep breath, Minato whispered to himself, "Be the grown-up, let it go. Be the grown-up, let it go…" Continuing his chant, he felt his eyes being unexplainably led to the growing bruise on the brat's wrist. Feeling slightly guilty, he gestured awkwardly to the bruise. Had he really –?
Itachi sneered. Minato felt his jaw drop in disbelief. The brat actually sneered – perfectly too! He was only what – five?! What do Uchihas teach their children anyway? To fight before the walk and sneer before they talk? Unbelievable!
"There's no need to stare." Itachi cut in coldly, rolling down his sleeves. "I'm not as fragile as you, Hokage-sama." Somehow, he even managed to make his title seem like an insult.
Despite his mantra – his attempts to be the grown-up in the situation – Minato felt his fingers twitch and ache with the insane desire to twist that scrawny, little Uchiha neck! Taking a deep breath, he comforted himself with the thought that Itachi wasn't his son.
Though, he did pity the fool who had fathered the spawn. Life in the Uchiha household must be unbearable. Fleetingly, he considered prompting the man who had managed to survive that long under the same roof as the Devil Spawn. However, he quickly batted the idea aside. He didn't need any more Uchihas in authority. There was already enough Uchiha arrogance in the village to flood it three times over.
Putting more of them in power would be begging for trouble...
Somewhere far, far away, Uchiha Fugaku suddenly sneezed, causing his wife to turn to him in alarm. "I told you to bring a thicker coat," Mikoto chided, giving him a dry look. "It'll only get colder from here on out."
"I'm not cold!" Fugaku retorted through clenched teeth.
He really wasn't, he frowned.
TBC
