Disclaimer: I don't own Beyblade and you can tell by the way I bash the most "important" character(s)... And a few lame ones.
This was all written in pure fun and as a gift for my bestie. Whom I shall call Pest. Anyways, my warning for this chapter: Lee's nose bashing. Yes, that's right, I am dedicating this chapter towards bashing Lee's nose. Pest, this is for you. Thanks for the nose insults BTW.
It was a nice day at the Granger household. The sun was shining, the bids were singing, and Lee was in for a crap-load of insults. Wondering why? Well it all started when…
-3:45 p.m
Lee and Ray were on the couch talking as Rick played Xbox on the floor. He was wearing a headset and he was very into the game.
"No! John, JOHN LISTEN TO ME! Don't DO that." Rick shouted.
Ray turned towards him. "Rick, what the hell are you doing?"
Rick pressed a button and stood up throwing his fists in the air. "BOOM! HEADSHOT!"
Lee stared at Rick as he continued to press buttons on his controller violently. "GET RAPED CORPORAL SERGEANT!" Rick shouted.
Ray grabbed Lee's hand. "Uhhh let's go."
"Hahahahaha! In your face!" Rick shouted as they left the room.
Lee shuddered. "What the hell was that?"
Ray held his hands up. "I have no idea but I'm going to pretend that never happened."
As they turned the corner, Lee crashed into Robert.
"Hey, watch it Robert." Lee glared at the german.
Robert narrowed his eyes at Lee. Then, he smiled. "You're right Lee that was my fault."
Lee raised an eyebrow in surprise. "Really?"
"Yeah, I should have seen your nose coming a mile away." Robert smirked and brushed past Lee.
Lee's mouth fell open. "What did you just say?!" He shouted at Robert's retreating back.
Robert turned to Lee. "You know Lee, you could try drawing attention away from your nose by wearing something bigger. Like, I don't know… Russia?"
Lee's eyes flashed. "That's IT!" He lunged at Robert.
Robert's eyes widened and he ran into the living room tripping over Rick's Xbox.
"Robert?" Johnny, who was talking with Tala and Bryan in the corner of the room, turned towards him. "What's going on?"
"It's the attack of the big nose!" Robert joked.
Tala rolled his eyes. "Oh come on Robert, you can come up with better insults than that."
Bryan looked up at Lee. "Yeah Robert, I mean as long as he stays away from my cocaine, he's fine by me."
Michael smacked Bryan's arm from his spot on the floor. He was paying cards with Max. "Don't be mean."
"Yeah." Max agreed. "It's ok Lee, it's not the size of the nose that counts, it's what's inside it."
Ray covered his mouth to hold back his laughter as Lee's eyes widened.
Michael stared at Max incredulously as everyone else began laughing. Max stared at him innocently. "What? I'm just trying to help…" He pouted.
Tyson was rolling on the floor laughing his ass off while lee was slowly getting more and more pissed off.
Kevin stared at Lee sympathetically. "Lee at times like this, it's better to just go along with it. You lose a lot of laughs by not laughing at yourself."
"Yeah Lee." Ray agreed, eager to calm his friend. "When you laugh the world laughs with you. When you cry you cry alone-"
"And when you sneeze, there goes Japan." Rick finished, howling with laughter.
Ray smacked Rick as the room burst into laughter again. "Rick be nice."
"I'm sorry Lee." Rick said in between laughs.
Lee growled dangerously and was about to say something when he felt a smalltingle in his nose. "Ah.." Lee was about to sneeze.
"TAKE COVER!!!!!!" Tyson shouted and attempted to scramble under the table but he got stuck.
Michael kicked Tyson's ass and the fatty fell under the table. "Lee, ignore him."
"Come on Blondie. You know you wanna crack a few jokes too." Tala smirked.
Michael turned his head away pointedly.
Rick shook his head. "Michael's going on a nice streak."
Michael nodded. "Besides Lee, these insults are pretty lame."
Tyson poked his head out from under the table. "That's because I haven't used my amazing insult powers yet."
Kai scoffed.
Tyson glared. "Oh yeah?"
Kai stared back at Tyson.
"Fine! I'll show you." He cleared his throat. "Hey Lee, your nose is so big, you make Dumbo jealous."
Everyone stared at Tyson.
"Tyson," Ray said slowly. "Dumbo had big ears not a big nose…."
Tyson thought for a second. "No, Dumbo is the puppet."
Kai rolled his eyes. "No, Dumbo is the fat idiot hiding under the table."
"Hey at least my nose doesn't resemble Mount Everest." Tyson shot back.
"I've figured it out!" Tala said. "Lee, are you trying to compensate for anything?" He winked.
"You little fucker!" Lee lunged at Tala.
"NO!" Ray grabbed Lee. "Attacking Tala is NOT smart Lee."
Lee glared. "One more crack against my nose and you're dead."
"Are you threatening me?" Tala stood up.
"No." Ray pulled Lee back.
"You think my nose is big? Have you seen Ian?" Lee asked.
Tala frowned. "Good point."
"His nose is as big as him." Bryan joked.
"And Lee's nose is as big as his brain." Robert smirked, he had a plan.
But Lee wasn't falling for it. "That means my brain is huge." …On second thought, maybe he was.
"So you admit that your nose is huge?" Robert grinned.
Lee frowned. "No. It's average, if not smaller."
"Like your brain?"
"…Fuck you."
And there we go. Yeah, it's a bit short, but have any of you tried to write a whole chapter dissing someone's nose? It's pretty hard.
See ya later guys!
