Chapter 1: Fumbling TowardsDeath

Disclaimer: I do not own FF8 or its characters. I own all original characters in this fic.

If I wasn't doing this kind of exploration, I'd like to be doing some other kind of exploration. It might be more risky, or less risky, but, in the business of exploration, risk is part of the territory. ~ John L Phillips

oooOOOOooo

Adimar Zeno had an itch to explore. And ever since his eighteenth birthday, that's exactly what he'd done. First he'd traveled north to Trabia, climbed the Vienne Mountains and gone rappelling in the nearby Trabia Crater weeks later. Thanks to his family connections he'd been to all three Gardens, visited the fire caves, and been granted a special pass into Esthar. He'd found the underground Shumi Village, spent a year on a boat with a group of whalers from Fisherman's Horizon. Now he was twenty-seven and restless. He felt that he'd explored everything he could. All that was left was Centra.

Centra, the forbidden continent as it was now called, stretched across the southern portion of the globe, a series of large islands. Ten years ago it had become off-limits. Apparently a group of rogue Guardian Forces had settled there and made a bargain with the Garden leaders that they were to be left alone.

As far as Adimar was concerned that agreement did not involve him. Some magical creatures wouldn't stand between him and his need to explore. His lawyers had confirmed that and after offering an obscene amount of money he'd procured a small merchant ship with a crew of two to take him to the Nectar Peninsula on the northern most island of the Centra continent.

He could see it in the distance now, a stretch of green across the turbulent ocean. The small boat rocked and bounced on the waves. He could hear the water smacking against the wooden hull and the creaking of the planks below his booted feet. The anchor was dropped and the captain came up, his wide sun-tanned face twisted into an expression of trepidation.

"There's a dingy off the starboard for ya. We're not going any further."

Adimar shrugged and moved to walk past the other man, the wind teasing at the thick black curls of hair that he'd neglected to tame with gel while he was out at sea. He ducked below decks to the tiny storage room where he'd slept in a hammock opposite the other crew man. He gathered his pack and double checked his belongings, including the pup-tent and the tightly packed inflatable mattress.

When he got back on deck, the two men were waiting for him. He stopped in front of them, fixing a pleasant smile on his face.

"I thank you for the ride, gentlemen. I trust you will be here in two weeks as we agreed?" he asked as he dug in his pack for the remainder of their pay.

The captain snatched the stack of gil, counting it silently before lifting his head to stare at him with murky eyes. "Yer kidding yerself if you think you'll be alive then, boy. But we'll be here in two weeks to look for ya. Or yer body."

Adimar shook his head as he moved past the men for the rope ladder to descend the side of the ship. As promised, the small rowboat was awaiting him. As he sat and took a hold of the oars the men still onboard released the tethers and soon he was rowing his way towards the shore.

By the time he reached the beach, his arms were aching. The water was rough and he was battling against the tide. He jumped out when the bottom of the dingy scraped sand, grabbing a hold of the bow to drag it to shore. He pulled the boat up towards the dunes, and after some digging, buried it upside down in the sand, covering the hull with a few large leaves he cut from a nearby bush.

As he made his way from the beach, Adimar crossed over a hill and stopped at the highest point. He let out a gasp, staring out across the plains that stretched before him. Rising in the distance were what looked like the skyscrapers he'd seen in Esthar, cast from steel and glass, reflecting the scenery around them. They were magnificent. Anxious to see it up close, he began towards the city.

oooOOOOooo

Quistis sat on the bed brushing her hair as she watched Seifer tug his t-shirt off over his head. He dropped it to the floor and her gaze lingered on the crumpled grey cotton as the water in the attached bathroom switched on. Sometimes she wondered why she missed that man when he was gone. She stood, setting her brush atop the dresser before bending to pick up the shirt and put it in the hamper that she was constantly reminding Seifer she had bought for a reason.

He came out of the bathroom, wearing only a pair of grey cotton boxers as Quistis returned to her seat on the bed. Her eyes trailed over the hard planes and angles of his muscles as if she were committing them to memory. That wasn't really the case. Even if he as gone for a year, she doubted she could forget. He looked almost the same as he had that first night -- bloodied and bruised in the Balamb Hotel. He'd put on some healthy weight, the result of regular meals and less smoking and boozing. Not that she'd ever get him to give up either completely.

The bed dipped under his weight as he stretched out beside her and her gaze followed his movements.

"I know I'm hot but you're starting to creep me out with all the staring, Quis," he muttered, curling one arm under his pillow.

She rolled her eyes, turning onto her side to face him. The only light on in the room was on her bedside table and it caught in her loose blonde hair, casting a halo of gold around her face. Seifer reached up to catch a strand of it between calloused fingers. He knew she was waiting for him to talk about his mission. At first, when they'd only been together for a while, he didn't understand her need to talk about everything. In fact, it had bothered him. Then he'd come back from a particularly hideous mission. Children killers. Not like the students at Garden. These kids had been ruthless and bloodthirsty. Trained with abuse and forced to kill their own families, they knew only bloodshed and violence. Seifer had been sent in to take out the extremist group. He still had no idea how many young bodies had fallen on his blade that day.

Em had only been a baby then, a tiny helpless thing that he could hardly fathom was half of him. Those child killers and thoughts of his own lost childhood had made him desperately want something more for his own child.

When he'd brought this up with Quistis, she'd just looked at him and smiled, as if she'd already understood everything he'd been thinking.

"I know," she'd said. "I want more for her, too."

Becoming a father had definitely been the most frightening thing he'd ever done. It wasn't something he ever imagined or aspired to be. He had no memories of his real father, and even the time spent in the orphanage had been absent of a father figure; he hardly ever recalled Cid being around.

Being a father wasn't easy like being with Quistis was. Caring for someone and needing them was hard in a way, but he trusted she was able to protect herself. She was a strong woman. Not the damsel in distress like Rinoa had always been and even for all her powers always would be. Quistis needed him in the same way he needed her, but not for protection.

Seifer felt a pressure on his chest and blinked, pulled from his thoughts as he gazed up at the woman resting half atop him. She folded her arms, resting her head on them as she smiled at him.

"Something on your mind?" she asked.

He shifted, sliding one hand through the silky strands of her hair and down to rub at the small of her back. He could feel the warmth of her skin through the satin of her nightgown and smell the minty hint of toothpaste on her breath.

"Just thinking," he finally answered, lingering in the simple intimacy of the moment.

"You haven't told me how your mission went," she prompted when it seemed he'd say nothing more.

"It was successful, obviously. I'm here, aren't I?"

Quistis sighed, pushing off his chest to sit up. This song and dance was old. Seifer always had to pretend he didn't want to talk about things, but she knew better. Raising one brow she stared down at him expectantly.

He groaned, rubbing a hand over his face. "I tracked him to the forests north of Timber. There were others. More than I expected. I was able to use the element of surprise to take some of them out fast. It wasn't really a one-man job."

"You're good, even Squall knows that, but do you think the intel on this guy was wrong?"

He smiled at her simple statement regarding his ability then shook his head. "Not wrong, just incomplete. A lot of these guys who were injured in the war are pissed. And who can blame them? It isn't the first time the Galbadian Army has been used for someone else's agenda."

Quistis shifted to lie beside him, close enough so her arm pressed against his. She watched the fan above the bed make lazy circles and heard the faint crash of the ocean in the distance through the open window.

"How was everything here?" Seifer asked, sliding his arm under her shoulders to draw her against him.

"Okay." She nodded, pressing her head against his chest so she could hear his heartbeat. "Rinoa and I took the kids to the fair. I think they actually stopped arguing long enough to have fun."

Seifer smirked, thinking fondly of the time when Em had given Commander Puberty's little brat a black eye.

"… it's kind of strange how much they fight, conflicting personalities I suppose. But Rin seems convinced that in five or six years they'll be flirting."

"What!?" Seifer sat up so fast that Quistis almost tumbled to the floor.

She glared at him from where she lay sprawled across the bed, her hair strewn out behind her with some strands falling over her face.

He seemed oblivious to her annoyance, frowning at her. "Why would Rinoa say something like that?!"

Quistis groaned and maneuvered under the covers. "I don't know, Seifer. Maybe she thinks it would be cute."

"It would not be cute. It would be horrible."

"You only say that because you're afraid to be related to Squall," she said, reaching over to shut off the bedside lamp.

The moonlight filtered through the open window and she could see him clearly as he scowled in her direction. "I'm not afraid of anything. I just don't want that little wimp touching my daughter."

Quistis closed her eyes, rolling so that her back was towards him. "You're being ridiculous. She's only nine."

There was some rustling of the sheets and she felt the warmth of his body pressed against her back. His arms came around her, stroking lightly over her stomach through the fabric of her nightgown. He sighed softly, his breath teasing through her hair and warming the back of her neck. She relaxed against him, a smile tugging at her lips. Sometimes he really was a typical protective father. She rather dreaded the day when her daughter started dating.

Seifer closed his own eyes, inhaling the scent of her shampoo and feeling the coolness of the sheets against his skin. He could tell by the pattern of her breathing that she was still awake. The night was quiet and peaceful. Em would be tucked into bed, hopefully asleep -- though the comics they often found under her pillow suggested that bedtime was an extensible notion in her mind. As he drifted to sleep he had no way to know that this might be the last normal night he'd have again.

oooOOOOooo

Selphie's fingers dashed over the controls as she guided Ragnarok in to land in the abandoned lot at Fisherman's Horizon. Her teammates Raijin and Fujin prepared to disembark as she lowered the rear hatch.

Outside the day was overcast and the streets were littered with rubble from a recent storm. Selphie tugged at the hem of her bright yellow skirt, her brown boots scuffing along the pavement as she looked over her shoulder at the others.

"Captain said he'd meet us at the pier, ya know," Raijin said, indicating which direction they should walk.

"What accomplish?" Fujin asked. "Too late."

Selphie shrugged slightly, worried as her green eyesscanned the ships lined at the dock. "We have to confirm he let Zeno off at Centra, find out what we can, and report to Squall. Maybe if he can contact the GFs and explain, we can avoid a battle."

"Doubtful," the silver-haired woman replied, heading towards the small merchant ship with the name Fedalla stenciled on the side. "Unreasonable."

The others knew she was right. Their last battle with the GFs had proven that they were more likely to attack first and ask questions later.

As they approached the ship they saw the captain step onto the deck. He was a hefty man with a wide sun-tanned face and a bushy black beard. He watched with squinting eyes as they came closer and waved them towards the small wooden plank from which to board. He stared down at them, chewing something black and bitter-smelling. It stained his teeth and he turned to spit it over the ship's rail and into the ocean.

"Ya must be the SeeDs that contacted me a little while ago." He rubbed a fat hand through his coarse beard and looked them over. "I told ya then I already dropped that stupid kid off. He's a fool if you ask me. Looking to die."

Selphie grimaced, looking anywhere but at his blackened teeth. "You're sure it was Centra you dropped him at, sir?"

"Of course I'm sure," he fairly growled. "It's been marked as forbidden territory for the last ten years but I can still read a damn map, little girl."

Selphie took no offense at his outburst. "Do you happen to know what your passenger was planning on doing in Centra?"

The captain scoffed, scratching at his jaw. "Hyne knows I didn't ask, but the damn kid went on and on. How he's been everywhere, seen everything. Except Centra. Said he had to go. He owed it to society or some shit. I didn't pay him much mind. Thought he was nuts, but he paid well."

"When you dropped him off did you… see anything?" Selphie asked carefully.

"I didn't see nothing and I didn't want to. We didn't take him ashore. Couldn't see nothing but the beach."

The three SeeDs exchanged glances of some relief, glad that at least the ship hadn't been seen by the Guardian Forces. Maybe one man wandering about wouldn't anger them.

"One last thing, Captain," Selphie said as the others turned to make their way toward the dock. "Do you know how Mr. Zeno was planning to return home?"

"Sure do. Fool expects me to meet him offshore in two weeks. My money says he won't make the meeting." With that he turned and walked away, his boots sounding on the planks of the ship's deck. Selphie watched him dip his black-tipped fingers into a can of tobacco and pinch some between his thumb and forefinger. She turned away before she could see him push the substance into his mouth.

Raijin offered her a hand to steady herself as she stepped from the ship. He looked down at her and she sighed, making her way back towards where Ragnarok was parked.

"What do we tell the Commander, ya know?" the large man asked as they boarded the airship.

"We tell him what we learned. He's the one who has to make the hard decisions." Selphie strapped into the pilot's chair, hoping that war was not imminent. She glanced back to watch FH disappeared in the distance, a sinking feeling filling her heart.

oooOOOOooo

It had taken longer than expected for Adimar to cross from the beach to the gleaming city. When he drew close enough he saw that the buildings were not made of glass at all, but rather were pulsing columns of magic. The ground around the city was flat and smooth like polished stone of deep black. He crossed the threshold, stepping from the dew-stained grass to the stone pavement. His boots left wet tread marks behind him as he made his way deeper into the city.

The buildings rose around him, shimmering pillars of varying size, out of the black stone. The glowing walls of these places looked clear like glass but he could see nothing inside of them. A trick of magic most likely. As he approached the center of the town, he saw that all of the buildings radiated outward from a central point like a starburst. The center itself was open, rather like a town square with a large sunken area that at first glance looked like a pond or a fountain. As Adimar moved closer he could see it was instead a sort of fount of magic. He recognized it then as a draw point. He had come across many of them in his travels. It seemed the city was built around it but he didn't have the knowledge to guess at what type of magic it was.

The place seemed deserted, silent but for the soft humming of the buildings. Adimar watched the shimmer of magic on their surfaces and was reminded of the Champagne waterfall he'd had at his graduation party. The sunlight cast a magnificent sparkle over everything and he closed his eyes against the glare.

When he opened them again, he was no longer alone. A woman stood before him, mere inches away. She was as tall as he was with platinum hair that fell down to her hips and eyes like pale amethysts. She did not move and he began to wonder if she was real, studying the bronze tones of her skin. But even if she were a statue, how had she gotten there? He'd heard not a sound.

He was reaching out a hand to touch her when she spoke, halting him.

"Human, you are forbidden here."

He dropped his hand to his side, giving the woman his friendliest smile.

"Actually, I'm not a member of any of the Gardens. I'm an independent explorer." He held out his hand in greeting. "My name is Adimar Zeno ma'am, and I'm here to explore this continent."

She looked down at his hand briefly, her expression unchanging then back at his face. "I care not for your name or purpose. You have violated the agreement."

"Look lady, I didn't make any agree-" he was cut off when she simply disappeared.

He frowned, twisting this way and that, looking for any sign of her, but she was gone. He felt relieved rather than annoyed and turned with the intention of leaving the city.

Suddenly the air around him was violently disturbed, as if a storm had swept in out of nowhere. It whipped around him, catching at his clothes and hair. The wind battered at his face, forcing him to squeeze his eyes shut. He felt sparks dancing over his skin and a bright light washed over him, bright enough to see through his eyelids. Then, as fast as the disturbance had come, it was gone. Slowly he opened one eye, peering cautiously about.

His other eye flew open and he stared into the endless darkness that now surrounded him. Gone were the tall magical buildings and the stone ground beneath his feet. There were no trees, no sunshine, and no blue sky stretching out behind him. As Adimar turned around, he realized that something bad had happened, but he had no idea where he was.

A voice, feminine and familiar echoed through the emptiness. "Death comes for you today."