"Hey, Russia?" The voice startled Russia. He hadn't expected to hear it. Wait, why is he in my bed? Russia asked himself. He turned to see Canada lying there, watching him. He hadn't fallen asleep there last night, had he? God, Ivan's memory really was screwed up

"What's wrong?" asked Russia.

"Nothing. We have a meeting today. Do you feel like going? We can ditch it if you want." Russia didn't know if he wanted to go. On one hand, it would probably bring back memories—seeing all those faces. But on the other, he'd have to face the people he had hurt.

"I guess we should go." It would make Russia's heart hurt to see Lithuania and other former Soviet nations, but he would just suck it up and deal. He crawled out of the bed and made his way to the closet. He found a black suit and pulled it on. He looked in the mirror. He hadn't seen the scars around his neck before. That must have been why he wore that scarf.

"Canada, how did I . . ." he trailed off and got wrapped into a memory.

A man, ugly as hell, wrapped his fingers around Russia's neck. Too tight. He was suffocating.

"You listen, Ivan, if you ever do this again, I swear to god I will kill you. Understand?" He was the leader of Russia, how could he threaten to kill his own nation? Then again, it wasn't the first time. There had been times when rulers before this one had actually murdered Ivan, thinking it would make theme somehow stronger. He came back, of course, since his nation was still alive.

"Y—Yes sir," Ivan choked out. The grip was released, and Ivan fell to the floor. The place his ruler liked to see him most.

Oh my god. That asshole. Why did he do that? Can I kill him?

"Good. Now, do as your told and get him." Russia nodded.

What ensued was not clear memories. Just pictures flashing by.

A blonde am yelling as Russia dragged an albino away.

The albino being hit in the face by Russia.

The albino standing on a wall that was crumbling before masses of people. The Berlin wall. . .

Ivan snapped out of it.

"Russia? Are you okay?" Canada's voice was worried.

"Who's the albino? And the blonde? Why do I remember them?" Ivan sat down on the edge of the bed, prepared for the worst.

"That was Prussia. And Germany. You took over East Germany in the Cold War. Prussia served as the Eastern part." Canada sat down and pat Russia's arm. "Whatever happened in your memory, don't worry about it. It was in the past."

"You said we could make new memories, da? But I can't seem to get rid of all of these old ones." To be honest, he almost didn't want the rest of the memories to come back. Every time, it brought some new horror. He didn't like seeing that monster of a man, who beat Lithuania and kidnapped Prussia, in the mirror.

"You don't have to. Just let them go for now. The new ones will replace the old." Canada smiled and placed a kiss on Russia's cheek. Russia leaned into the touch and wrapped an arm around his Canadian. He couldn't remember anything about the boy, and he didn't know what to do with him, but he did know that he loved him.

"I don't deserve you," muttered Ivan.

"I could say the same thing about you." They sat like that, Ivan practically holding Matthew, for a while. Then Canada looked into Russia's violet eyes. "We should probably go. It's a long drive to Minsk."

"We're meeting in Belarus? Please, spare me." Canada giggled.

"Yeah. She's a little scary, eh?" Russia stood and thought a moment on the idea of being inside his sister. It terrified him. Canada led Russia to a garage, filled with cars and motorcycles.

"If it weren't so cold we would ride a bike, da?"

"We could. It'd be cold as Helsinki, but it'd be fun."

"Next time, then." Ivan found a large black Hummer and the two hopped in. Canada insisted on driving, worried that Ivan would crash if he spaced out in a memory. He had a good point.

"So, do you have any crazy family members I should worry about? No one like Belarus, right?" asked Ivan.

"No, no one quite that insane. But I do have America for a brother. He's not too happy about us. He has a grudge against you for the Cold War."

"Same here. We'll find a way to get along. Who else?"

"England and France are actually alright with it. England has a good relationship with you economically. And France is alright with anyone England likes."

"Good. One nut job sister, and a whacko brother. Sounds fun. Our family reunions will be very funny, da?" Canada laughed.

"Yeah. Don't let Belarus near the meat or cake—she'll claim to be cutting it, then she'll throw the knife at my head."

"Meanwhile, I will be starting another World War with your brother, arguing over who has a bigger peninsula and who has better nuclear weapons." Canada grinned. "Which one of us would it be, I wonder. What do you think?"

"Um, you have a lot of good weapons." Matthew's face was getting red, thinking about the other question.

"Well? Kamchatka versus Florida. I win." They both laughed and grinned. Canada knew Russia was right, but it didn't make the question any less weird.

"Oh, yea, a border," muttered Canada.

The two nations calmed down from their giggles and spoke to the border guard, explaining what they were doing in the nation—there for a business meeting, followed by a return back to Russia. There was a little confusion about Matthew being from Canada, but they were able to pass without too much difficulty.

"We're inside Belarus," uttered Ivan. Canada grinned.

"To think—you wanted her to be one with mother Russia at one point."

Russia raised an eyebrow. "Must have been before I knew she needed to be one with the loony bin."

Madness. That was what was wrong with him. He was going insane, slowly. A piece of his sanity drifted away each day. He was slowly becoming a lunatic. If he wasn't already one.

Power. That's what he had. He wanted more. Ivan glared at the three who trembled before him Latvia, the smallest, was sobbing. Lithuania was shaking, trying to fade into the background, and failing. Estonia closed his eyes and tried to block out the situation.

"Come now, you hate me that much? You wouldn't leave me."

"We would. And we will. And we are." Estonia didn't open his eyes as his spoke. He stood, taking a breath. "We're sick of it." He grabbed Latvia by the wrist and tried to get Lithuania. Ivan placed an arm out possessively. If they were leaving, they sure as hell were not taking his favorite Baltic with them. Estonia tried to take his brother again, but Ivan slapped his wrist. Latvia's tears fell more quickly as Estonia took him away. At least Lithuania was still there.

He would have someone to suffer the insanity with him.

"I'm horrible."

"I—Ivan, what did you remember?" Canada was worried again. Crap. He didn't want Canada to worry.

"Estonia and Latvia left. I forced Lithuania to stay. I don't want to know what happened next." Ivan shuddered, knowing very well that Lithuania had been treated like shit after that.

"Russia, like I said, it's in the past. I'm sure they've forgiven you." Russia nodded, trying to agree. It was hard. He hardly thought that anyone would forgive him of the things he did. Ivan noticed Matthew's hand on the console, and took it in his own. Matthew smiled. Just twenty-four hours ago, he'd been a weird gay kid, now things were slowly returning to normal, in their relationship, that is.

Matthew spotted the hotel where the meeting would be taking place, and turned into the parking lot. After parking, he looked at Ivan, who was incredibly tense and nervous.

"It'll be okay," assured Canada.

"Da, I hope so." The two got out of the Hummer and walked up to the very fancy brick building. It was pretty—gothic architecture, and stained glass windows. But still, this was Belarus, and pretty as Belarus was, it was dangerous. They entered and soon found a room with a long table and many people. They sat side by side as Russia silently guessed at who each nation was.

"That one there, that's Germany, da? And Prussia?"

"Oui." Russia didn't even have to ask when he saw three shaky nations enter the room. Why were they shaking? Had he done something that caused them to shake out of fear their whole lives? God, he hoped not.

"Matvey, I'm going to go talk to them a moment, da?"

"Alright." Canada placed a peck on Russia's cheek. "Don't worry." Russia nodded and stood, walking to the three nations, who stood in a corner. No one else was actually sitting besides Canada now, but they were away from the group.

"H—Hello, Mr. R—R—Russia." That was the smallest one, Latvia. He looked like he was about to cry.

"Good afternoon," he replied. Russia realized that he was much taller than the other nations. It made him a bit intimidating. He bent down a little. That seemed to scare them worse, so he stood back up.

"W—What's going on, s—sir?" asked the boy. Russia's eyes looked down. God, he was the reason this boy was so afraid. He hated it.

"I lost most of my memory in a car crash, you know?"

"Y—You did?" asked the brunette, it was Lithuania.

"Da. But a few things came back. I want to apologize."

"For what?" asked Estonia, looking a little bit confused.

Russia sighed. So, he'd been so bad they'd never thought he would apologize for it. That hurt, like a blow to the gut by some iron fist. "For all those horrible things I did to you. I just want to apologize. I was a monster, and I see that now." He shifted his gaze. "I understand if you don't forgive me." Because, seriously, Russia wouldn't forgive him if he were in their shoes.

"Mr. Russia, of course we forgive you," said Estonia. "If you've changed this much, then of course we do." The man smiled. A still slightly shaky Latvia gave him a grin.

"Thank you," Russia said. He hugged them all gently and smiled. "Thank you." He left to be seated with Canada.

"How'd it go?" asked the curious Canadian.

"They forgave me." Russia didn't see how. He was such an asshole. But he was glad.

Happy thoughts ran through Russia. He hit the albino once more. That pale body was splattered in red blood.

"Now, East Germany, why don't you listen and do as told? That way, this wouldn't happen anymore, da?" Russia was grinning.

"Over . . .my . . .d—dead. . . body." The boy was barely conscious.

"Gladly." Ivan swung a pipe and hit the man in the head, knocking him out cold. He grinned. There, Prussia would learn to listen, one way or another. Still, in spite of the albino's defiant nature, Ivan was happy. It mean he got to play with his pipe.

"Damn it," muttered Ivan.

"R—Russia? What's going on? Did you have another flashback?"

"Da. Write down another name on my apology list."

Thank you. . .

Da, this was supposed to be a oneshot, but ya'll liked it, and I got a request for more chapters. So here's some more. It will be longer than this. 5 Chapters.

Thanks for kind reviews and for favs!