Author's Note: Random craziness! Yay! It's fun to kidnap superpowers. Really fun. Especially when beer, wine, and tomatoes are involved.

You have been warned.

Flashback is in italics.


America woke up in a dark room, his head throbbing. He shifted uncomfortably, but was too weak to do much but sit up. "Where...?"

Someone touched his shoulder. "Shh..."

America turned his head toward the noise, but he couldn't see anything.

"Who are you?" he whispered.

"I'm Canada."

"Oh," America said, embarrassed. He knew how often his brother was asked that question. "Sorry. I can't see..."

"It's OK. Your eyes will adjust. Do you remember what happened to you?"

"Um... Well, after you kicked me out..."


America frowned at his brother's door. (Well, actually, he frowned at the Canada-United States border. But whatever, close enough.)

"Mattie!" he whined. "Please come to the party tonight! Pretty please?"

"Just go, Alfred! I'll come, alright? Just leave me in peace for a while!" Canada yelled from inside his house. (Somehow, the sound traveled all the way across the border. Country powers?)

America perked up. "Great! See you at 7!"

He bounced away.

When he returned home, he immediately called up England, Japan, Lithuania, Prussia and Denmark. Prussia said he might be late, but they all agreed to go to the party. Even though England muttered something about "the bloody idiot" and "the Revolutionary War".

America rushed to prepare for everyone's arrival.

Japan got there first, at 5, to help America prepare the food. His eyes bugged out a little when he saw how much America wanted to make.

"Um, America-kun... Is it necessary to make so much food? Didn't you say you only invited 6 people?"

"Yeah, but the whole world will most likely end up coming."

"Uh..." Japan doubted the truth of this statement, but didn't ask. "Whatever you say, America-kun."

But America's statement was soon proven true. A few minutes after Japan's arrival, Turkey and Greece popped up, arguing over who Japan liked more. (Japan merely sighed.) They were followed by Egypt and a bunch of cats. America merely smiled and put out some cat food.

Next to arrive was Lithuania, who brought the Latvia and Estonia along. He was followed by Poland, who was chattering about ponies, and Russia, who was being stalked by Belarus, who was being trailed by a tearful Ukraine. America yelled something about commies infiltrating his party, but was quickly calmed down by Japan and Lithuania.

After the former Soviet Union members settled down, Denmark showed up dragging Norway with him. Finland, and thus, Sweden, were following with Iceland, who brought along Hong Kong, who contacted South Korea, who somehow managed to drag along China, Vietnam, Taiwan, Tibet, and Thailand, who was followed by India as they had been in the middle of an Elephant Lovers Club meeting. Finland and Sweden also brought Sealand, who managed to drag all of the other micronations along as well.

England was the last of the invited ones to arrive (besides Prussia). He was being stalked by France, who brought Spain, who dragged along Romano, who was followed by Italy. Germany was dragged along by Italy, and was followed Austria and Switzerland, who wanted a free meal, and brought along Hungary and Liechtenstein.

Cuba and Netherlands, after hearing that the party was for Canada as well, showed up with Belgium, who brought Seychelles.

Prussia popped up a few minutes after 7, a grin on his face. He went up to America.

"Hey America! Birdie told me he wanted to tell you something."

"Oh, Canada's here? Dude, that's great! Where is he?"

"He's outside. Here, I'll take you there."

Prussia lead America out into the yard, where France and Spain were waiting. America looked around in confusion.

"Where's Matt-"

A tomato smacked him in the face, and the world went black around him.


Canada giggled. America glared at him.

"Mattie! Stop laughing! I swear, that tomato was unnatural! Spain probably spiked it with something! Or France did! You lived with him! You know what he's capable of!"

Canada burst into a fit of laughter. He gasped for air, tears streaming down his face.

"That's... That's worse than what happened to me! Maple... That's too funny..." Canada finally managed to gasp out.

America, annoyed, tugged on his twin's curl. Hard.

"Ow! Alfred! What was that for?" Canada rubbed his head, frowning.

"Stop laughing and tell me what happened to you!"

"Oh. Prussia drugged me with maple beer."

America's eye twitched. "What."

"Prussia gave me maple beer. And I passed out. Remember what happened when France gave me maple wine?"

"Pfft. That's what happened to you?" America rolled his eyes and laughed.

Canada, smiling, stole Texas.

"Hey! Mattie, give Texas back!" America lunged toward Canada, missing his glasses completely. He snatched Quebec instead. [A/N: Yes, I've made Canada's glasses Quebec. Deal with it.]

"Hey! Give that back!"

"Never!" America put the glasses on. "Hey, I can actually see through these! Hey, does this mean Quebec is now part of the US?"

"If it does, then Texas is now part of Canada." Canada put his twin's glasses on and smirked.

"NOOOOO! Not Texas! Anything but Texas! Give it back!" America playfully grabbed at his brother.

"Never! You can keep Quebec!" Canada said, laughing and dodging America's advances.

"Noo! I don't want France-y stuff in me!"

"The correct term is French!"

"Whatever!"

America finally succeeded in catching Canada, and returned the state/province glasses to their correct nations. Then he got serious again. "What's with Prussia? I mean, kidnapping you on your birthday? Not cool! The hero is going to go knock some sense into him!"

He got up and stomped over to the door, gripping the handle.

"Al... The door is locked..."

CRACK!

"Not anymore!" America turned with a grin on his face, the door handle ripped straight out of the door. Canada sweatdropped.

"Oh yeah... Super strength..."

"C'mon! Let's go show them what North America is made of!"


After wandering around for a few hours, they were back where they started. America was very annoyed.

"What the heck? Is this place a maze or something?" He stomped over to the wall and punched a hole in it.

"Ve~! Si!"

"Dammit, fratello! Shut up!"

Both Canada and America had WTF faces.

"Uh... Did I just hear Italy? Both of them?" America asked Canada.

"Ve~ PAAS- MMPH!"

"CHIGI! What part of 'Shut up' don't you understand!"

"Yes, you did," Canada responded.

The North American brothers peered into the hole that America had created in the wall to find the Italy brothers crouched in the hollow space inside of it. Italy was visibly trembling in fear, while Romano's face was as red as the tomatoes he loved so much.

"What are you looking at, you bastards!" he yelled.

America adopted a very Russia-esque grin, while Canada randomly summoned a hockey stick out of nowhere. Together, they ripped the wall open, and the Italians tumbled out.

"You'll tell us what you know now," America said in a singsongy voice.

"Ve! Don't hurt me, I'll tell you everything! It was all Spain's idea! he told us to hide in the wall and spy on you and make sure you couldn't get out until AHH!"

This last was because Romano started shaking him. "Dammit, fratello! Don't tell them that, or else that bastard France will-" he shuddered. "Well, you know!"

"Ve, but that hockey stick is scary!" Italy pulled out his white flag and started waving it and yelling "Please don't kill me!"

Canada and America exchanged a look.

"Relax, dude, Canada's not going to kill you. He's too nice to do that."

"Eh, I wouldn't say that. But I won't harm you too much. After all, we're not at war."

"So tell us. What is going on? And don't worry about France, we can deal with him."

Romano glared at him. "He's in Europe with us, dammit, and you're in North America! Stupid hamburger bastard!"

"HEY! Who're you calling stu-"

"Relax, Romano, he's my former papa. I'll talk to him."

"Fine. But I won't tell you anything other than this: I hope you're in good physical condition, or you will be screwed. Everything will start tomorrow, so I suggest you get some sleep. It's already 9 pm, and you will need a full eight hours, at least."

Romano tugged on Italy's arm, and the two retreated into the wall at Italian retreat speeds. Before America or Canada could do anything more than blink, they fell through a hole that randomly opened up underneath them, Italy screaming in terror and Romano yelling "CHIGIII! SPAGNA, YOU BASTARDO!"

The hole closed, and America started pounding on it. "NOOOOO! Our escape route!"

Canada just sighed. "We might as well take Romano's advice and get some sleep. If he's telling the truth, who know what will happen tomorrow."


Author's Note: Canada, Canada. Forever the sensible one. And yes, he has the power to summon hockey sticks. And yell across his border. What did you expect?

Actually, the yelling across the border thing comes from a strip of Himaruya-san's. It's called Lazy Comic Country, and in it, China yells at Japan (and Greece) from across the ocean that separates their countries. It's also kinda-proof for Giripan. Go look it up. It's... awkward, but interesting...

A note about the Elephant Lover's Club: In one of the W Academy episodes at the beginning of Beautiful World (I forgot exactly which one), when the Axis is interviewing clubs, there is a really short shot (it's, like, one second long) of Thailand and India standing next to elephants, with the label of Elephant Lover's Club (or something close to that). Therefore, INDIA IS NOW CANON! YAY!

A note about Quebec: Yes, I decided that Canada's glasses represent Quebec. My reason? Well, Quebec is a well known province, much like Texas is a well known state, and Quebec has that thing where it wants to be its own country, so Canada has to keep an eye on it. Sorry for the horrible pun. I'm sorry if there's already a province the fandom says it represents, but I haven't come across it yet. And yes, I know there's a Canadian province that's described as Canada's Texas. I forgot which one it is... *hangs head in shame*