The cell I was in was completely black. It was impossible to tell how long I had been in here, but it felt like many hours. I was leaning against one of the walls, hugging my knees to my chest. There was nothing to do except try to control my emotions. My heart felt like a boulder in my chest, thudding heavily inside me. My breathing had begun to settle back into a gentle rhythm. I was fighting so hard against the heated tears behind my eyes. They were threatening to come pouring down at any moment. When someone came into this dark room, I was determined not to let them see me cry. The depression and fury I was feeling right now was suffocating, but I wouldn't cry for these men again. I had to stay strong, no matter what they threw at me.
I heard the sound of locks being undone on the other side of the door. I scrambled off the ground as the heavy metal door creaked open. Whoever came through, I would face them standing. A tall man filled the doorframe as he strode in casually. The light poured in behind him, allowing me to see him clearly. He had a stern face with neatly combed dark hair and a trimmed beard that had mostly gone gray. He had on a fancy looking leather jacket with a white t-shirt showing underneath. What was most attention grabbing was the weapon he leisurely rested on his shoulder, a baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire.
"Now what the hell is this?" He boomed suddenly, "This is a kid, not some goddamn prisoner of war. Get her something to rest on; our guest has had a long day." One of the two men behind him scurried away dutifully. "Hi," he said, addressing me directly this time, "I'm Negan. What's your name?" I just stared silently back at him, unsure of what to do. We stood there staring at each other in an awkward quiet for a moment before he let out a deep chuckle. "I heard you weren't a talker but this is just ridiculous. I'm gonna go easy on you here cause you're new to all this, but when I ask you a question," he moved the bat from its resting position and pointed it at me, "you answer. I am not a man who likes to repeat himself."
"My name is Melissa," my voice came out so quiet and mousy it made me feel like a scolded child.
"Now why would you wanna keep a pretty name like that a secret, huh?" He asked. I wasn't sure if he actually wanted a response or not but before I could mumble something out, he kept talking. "Now I'm gonna be steady with you Melissa, I don't want to have to hurt you. But, you have something that I want, and you're not sharing. If you keep this up, you're gonna get hurt. Now I know you have friends out there somewhere. You tell me where they are and everything's golden. So kid, where are you from?"
I looked down at my feet and felt a few tears slip out. They fell from my cheeks and I watched them drop to the floor. Goddamn it. I felt so weak and pathetic but I couldn't help it. The bat was only a few inches from my face, so close I could see dried blood on it. Negan was staring at me, waiting for my response. I was fucking terrified. I balled my trembling hands into fists and shook my head. "I can't tell you," I croaked.
I was expecting him to attack me. I thought he would punch me in the face or throw me to the ground. My biggest fear was that he would use that bat to cave my head in. But he didn't do any of those things. He just sucked his teeth and shook his head in disappointment.
"It's a damn shame the path you're choosing, but I respect it. I can tell you're scared. Hell, you'd be crazy not to be," he reached out to try and wipe one of the tears on my cheek but I flinched away, causing him to chuckle. "Yet, here you are, putting your life on the line for your people. You got balls kid. That shit's admirable, very admirable. I could always use people like you."
I looked back up in him, eyes wide. Was he actually making me an offer? The man who had run off before returned with a blanket and pillow. He dropped it in the corner of the cell and backed out wordlessly.
"You can be a part of this. Channel that anger and that hate you're feeling, and help us create a new world," he said, "or you can stay in here, living in darkness, which is a real goddamn waste." He rested his bat on his shoulder, turned, and started walking out of the room, "think about it kid."
He walked out and one of the men closed the door behind him. I heard the locks being redone and the sound of the men's footsteps disappearing down the corridor. In darkness and silence again, I slid down the wall, collapsing with my face in my hands. These four walls were going to become my hell.
