Breathe Me
Help me. I've done it again.
There was no particular reason. No worse case, no anniversary, no fight, nothing. I accuse nobody except myself. I didn't want to do it, but I did. I needed it. I didn't manage to hold myself back.
Help me.
Gibbs. Abby. McGee. Anyone.
Please help me.
Take my knife from my hand. Hold me tight. Wrap me. Protect me from the world and myself Help me to develop myself. I appear so great, so brave, so strong, but I am small.
Every case, every death, every loss.
Chris, Kate, Paula, Jeanne, Jenny.
So many names which follow me.
Keep me warm. I'm so cold. I need it. Need you.
Look at me! Breathe for me. Breathe with me.
I can't cope with it any longer. I can't make it anymore without harming myself. I can't breathe.
I've lost myself. See only my mask. Don't know who I am. Which is my real me.
Help me. Anyone.
I don't have much time. I see cracks. Cracks in my mask which hides nothing anymore.
What happens if it breaks completely? I don't know what to do. How should I protect myself? How should I live?
Please.
Ziva. Ducky. Jimmy. Anyone.
No matter who hears me. No matter who sees me. Anyone. Please.
Be my friend. See me. Keep me warm. Protect me. Show me who I am. What I was. What I will be.
Uplift me. Let me forget the names.
Jeffrey, Michelle, Michael.
Let me live again. Breathe for me. Make me breathe and breathe with me.
Be my friend. Show me that I am not alone. That there is more than pain to show me that I'm still alive.
Show me how to live. Please. I just need a friend. Just need a hug. Just need some heat. Just need something to breathe.
End
A/N: This isn't a real fic but more of a shred of Tony's thoughts. I was really depressed as I wrote this... so sorry if it's a little bit ooc.
I wrote this 2010 so this is pre-Baltimore.
Warning: depression, self harm
Rating: PG-13
Category: Drama
Characters/Pairing: Tony
Song: "Breathe Me" by Sia
Word count: 312 words
Breathe Me
Help me. I've done it again.
There was no particular reason. No worse case, no anniversary, no fight, nothing. I accuse nobody except myself. I didn't want to do it, but I did. I needed it. I didn't manage to hold myself back.
Help me.
Gibbs. Abby. McGee. Anyone.
Please help me.
Take my knife from my hand. Hold me tight. Wrap me. Protect me from the world and myself Help me to develop myself. I appear so great, so brave, so strong, but I am small.
Every case, every death, every loss.
Chris, Kate, Paula, Jeanne, Jenny.
So many names which follow me.
Keep me warm. I'm so cold. I need it. Need you.
Look at me! Breathe for me. Breathe with me.
I can't cope with it any longer. I can't make it anymore without harming myself. I can't breathe.
I've lost myself. See only my mask. Don't know who I am. Which is my real me.
Help me. Anyone.
I don't have much time. I see cracks. Cracks in my mask which hides nothing anymore.
What happens if it breaks completely? I don't know what to do. How should I protect myself? How should I live?
Please.
Ziva. Ducky. Jimmy. Anyone.
No matter who hears me. No matter who sees me. Anyone. Please.
Be my friend. See me. Keep me warm. Protect me. Show me who I am. What I was. What I will be.
Uplift me. Let me forget the names.
Jeffrey, Michelle, Michael.
Let me live again. Breathe for me. Make me breathe and breathe with me.
Be my friend. Show me that I am not alone. That there is more than pain to show me that I'm still alive.
Show me how to live. Please. I just need a friend. Just need a hug. Just need some heat. Just need something to breathe.
End
