"Moments in Between"

Timeline: one week before "Aisle 13"
Rating: T
Disclaimer: Flashpoint and Gatorade do not belong to me.
A/N: I appreciated the feedback and reviews on the last chapter, please continue to read and review! I present the second one-shot on the theme of "cherished moments of peace." It's not quite as fluffy as the first one, but I think it fills in the background for an important interaction. Also, I used Ben instead of Matt as the name for Sam's best friend, because in my opinion Sam wouldn't lie to Kovacs. What a slip up for the writers to make, changing the name! Thanks to Tinkerpanda for betaing, and enjoy!

Chapter 2: Conservation

Sam Braddock's apartment, 7:18 PM Monday evening.

"Hey Jules, I'm home," Sam called as he opened the door of his apartment. Jules muted the TV in the kitchen as she turned to greet him, a bottle of Gatorade in her hand as she learned against the island counter.

"How was work?" she smiled, watching him take in her post-work out appearance as he set down his bag and bike helmet.

"Good. Nothing too crazy today," he responded. He fanned the front of his shirt, pulling the sticky collar away from his throat as he walked into the kitchen. Taking out a bottle of water from the fridge, he unscrewed the cap as if he were in a hurry. "Ugh, I always get so sweaty when I walk into a heated building after biking."

"It's 8 degrees out; there must be something wrong with you," Jules raised an eyebrow at him as he gulped water in an attempt to cool himself. Wiping his mouth, he smiled at her and leaned over the island to kiss her. She leaned forward to meet him, their lips briefly touching. When Jules drew back, she wrinkled her nose: "Your face is sweaty, too!"

"All of me is sweaty," he responded, swallowing another mouthful of water. Jules chose not to read into that statement. "You just get back from the gym?" he asked, gesturing at her damp hair, pulled back in a ponytail.

"Yeah. I'm back down to a seven-thirty mile! One more doctor's appointment and then I can start scheduling the SRU reentry tests. It's time to end this sick leave."

"That's great, Jules!" he said brightly.

"Which reminds me…" she started slowly, and Sam's blue eyes dropped from hers. "We need to talk about what happens once I rejoin the team."

After a heartbeat of silence, Sam looked up again and responded, "Can we talk about it later? I'm dripping sweat all over the floor here."

That was an exaggeration, but he did have a point. She glanced away resignedly. "Yeah, sure; later." He'd been trying to weasel out of this conversation for a month; she had a feeling "later" wouldn't happen tonight. Normally she wouldn't have a problem being the "bad cop" and forcing the conversation, but for some reason she kept hesitating.

Sam's movement toward the bathroom caught her eye, and she turned her head back around. She found herself staring at his empty water bottle for a second before a thought popped into her head and she called after him, "Don't use all the hot water! I've still got to take a shower too, you know."

"You could join me," he offered, his voice muffled slightly by the wall now between them. "Sharing conserves water!"

She could almost see him waggling his eyebrows at her. She rolled her eyes before yelling back, "You know that wouldn't cool either of us down!"

Some mumbling that sounded distinctly like, "Well, that's kind of the point…" came from his bedroom as she heard his shirt collar pop over his head and then the "zzzip" of a zipper being undone. She turned back toward the TV and turned up the volume, trying not to get too distracted.

Tuesday morning, 2:45 AM.

Jules woke with a start, staring confusedly at the darkness around her and wondering what had roused her from her sleep. A second later she had her answer – Sam's forearm twitched, and the movement reverberated through the mattress, into her hand few inches away. Sam's dreaming.

When he jerked again a few seconds later, more severely, his last three fingers curled around an invisible something. She looked at his face and realized she was wrong: he wasn't dreaming, he was having a nightmare.

Brow cinched together tightly, mouth drawn into a frown, Sam's eyeballs moved rapidly underneath their lids as his hands became more agitated. She wondered what personal battle he was fighting, and whether it was a story he had trusted her with.

He turned his head up and inhaled sharply, whispering something that sounded like, "Ben… Gotta go… Wrong…" She wondered if she should wake him up before the nightmare got too bad. For the moment, though, she found it fascinating to watch him confront his dream demons, entrenched in a world far away from her and his apartment.

His head movements became more frantic as the nightmare apparently became more intense. Instinctively, now, she reached her hand out and placed it lightly on his upper arm in an attempt to soothe him.

Instantly he jerked awake, his sudden stillness a shock to her. His eyes were wide open, reflecting what little light came in through the window, but he was staring out somewhere above her shoulder. She released his arm a few seconds later as she felt his muscles relax. His eyes then came back into focus and moved down to meet hers. All of a sudden she felt shy in front of him, having witnessed the embodiment of his nightmare, but he smiled innocently when his eyes met hers. "Jules…" he whispered. His eyes slowly, slowly slipped shut once again as he fell into a newly peaceful sleep.

Jules lay there watching him after he fell asleep. It was like she was in a trance for a minute; she felt as if she hadn't breathed. She exhaled and reached for his hand, closing her fingers around his limp ones. As his fingers curled slightly around hers, she said softly, "I love you, Sam."

Now she was the one who froze momentarily. The words had slipped from her mouth without a thought, unintentionally. He was sound asleep, though, his even, peaceful breathing undisturbed by her declaration of love.

Once uttered, she couldn't deny to herself it was true. In fact, Jules now wondered how long she'd been keeping it in. Sam had told her he loved her for the first time only two days after she had been shot. He wasn't expecting to hear it back, for which she was grateful. In the intervening months, however, she could tell that he had started to feel self-conscious saying it when she smiled or kept silent in reply, just as she felt embarrassed at not being capable to admit the sentiment in return.

Well, shit, she thought. If we love each other, what happens when I come back to Team One?

'The same thing that would happen if I hadn't realized I love him,' a voice in the back of her mind responded. That voice was right, she realized – they loved each other, but they both loved their SRU family even more fiercely.

In fact, she realized further, now more than ever she had to end it. She had to end it before their love for each other became stronger than that for their team. We're already too involved. We should have ended it sooner… she berated herself. But I couldn't help myself, and neither could Sam, she admitted.

However, she steeled her mind: We need to end it now, before it becomes impossible. She knew that she and Sam would still be able to work together after breaking up, even if it would be a little awkward. But if they continued their relationship now and broke up later because of the rules or something else? No, then they might tear apart the team. It was imperative to end their relationship now to keep that sacred thing, their work family, whole.

That was why they could never have a proper conversation about what was going to happen once she got back on duty: neither of them wanted to admit the team was a higher priority than their relationship.

Whether or not she and Sam had that conversation he was so good at avoiding, she now knew what she had to do. That knowledge wasn't comforting, though.

It was a long while before Jules could fall back asleep.

xx