AN: I forgot to add a disclaimer. I don't own anything related to Once and Again. Thanks for the reviews so far. Please read and give me some feedback please! :) Thank you:)
*Chapter Two*
I rolled out of bed the following morning feeling as though I hadn't slept a wink. After Robin left, I sat in my room and was consumed with my thoughts. I went from being a carefree teenager to a father. I rifled through my clothes desperately trying to find something decent to wear. I quickly dressed and headed into the house to grab a quick bite.
"Morning E." Jessie said to me from the table.
I quickly glanced at her before I opened the refrigerator.
"Hey."
"What are you doing up so early on a Saturday?" She asked as she dug into her cereal bowl.
"What do you mean?" I asked back trying to be heard over her annoying clanking from the bowl and her spoon.
Jessie stopped and looked at me.
"It's just normally you sleep until after noon and then you just lay around all day." She answered honestly. That was the truth to me. Oh how I loved those days.
I continued to work on spreading cream cheese on my bagel. Just then Lily strolled into the kitchen, coffee mug in hand.
"Well, good morning Eli. You're up early!." She stated with surprise.
"So I'm up a few hours than normal. You guys act like I've never gotten up early in my life." I grumbled as I tossed the cream cheese back into the refrigerator carelessly.
Lily watched me intently with that concerned over dramatic motherly look she used often on Grace and Jessie.
"You still look really tired Eli. Maybe you should get a little more sleep." She said with concern.
"Yeah E, you don't look so good." Jessie piped in.
I chewed my current mouthful and shook my head in disbelief. What was wrong with my family anyway?
"Gee, thanks guys. I love you all too." I said as I tossed the rest of my breakfast in the garbage.
"No problem." Jessie replied with her adorable toothy grin.
I chuckled a bit to myself and than said "I'm headin out. Be back later."
My mind began to wander aimlessly as I began my drive that morning. How on earth was I going to tell my dad? Or Mom? Oh God. Just the thought of what the conversation would contain made me want to curl up in a corner and die. What would the rest of the family say about it?
I looked over in the passenger seat at the scribbled directions to make sure I was heading in the right direction. The bagel I tried to eat was now sitting uneasy in my stomach. I had tried to go about it like it was no big thing. Just a normal errand but it didn't work. I was scared beyond believe for what was going to happen next.
The cool morning air felt good on my sweating forehead. It sure seemed like I was sweating a lot more these days. I took another right and that's when I saw the park where Robin agreed to meet the night before. As I drove closer I saw a women sitting on a bench with a baby stroller. I felt my foot ease on the gas as I mentally contemplated pulling a U turn in the middle of the road. I silently scolded myself and before I knew it the car was in park. I took another deep breath and then got out of the car. It felt like I was walking at the speed of light and soon I found myself standing in front of them.
"Hey" I said to Robin while my gaze fell on the back the stroller. I found myself imagining what was behind the material.
"Morning, I was beginning to think I messed up the time or something." She stated.
I shoved my hands in my jean pockets and replied "Sorry, I got a bit delayed on my way. Have you been waiting long?"
Robin shook her head lightly as she pushed the stroller back and forth.
"Good." I stammered like a total idiot. For the life of me, I couldn't find the right thing to say or do at that moment. Nothing seemed right anymore.
Robin opened her mouth to say something but her ringing cell phone stopped her. She whipped it out of her purse and quickly picked up as she gave me an apologetic look.
"Hello......oh hey... what?.... that can't be.... You've got it wrong!" She yelled into her phone.
I watched her from my place as she quickly engaged in a heated discussion with the caller on the other end.
"No, that can't be...wait, can you hold on a second?" She asked into the phone and then looked at me. "I need to take this. I'll be right back." And with that she stood and walked off to have a more private conversation.
"Wait, Robin... what..." I rebutted but shut up once I realized I alone. Not completely alone though.
All of the sudden I heard a noise from behind the stroller. I cautiously walked around and finally stood in front of the stroller. I peered inside and saw a similar pair of eyes staring up at me. It was then I felt my knees grow weak and I soon sat down. I studied the baby lying in front of me intently trying to dissect everything I saw. Her hair was covered with a hat as well as her body with a thick blanket. She was smaller than I thought she'd be... who the hell am I kidding? I had no idea what a two month old baby was supposed to look like. I vaguely remembered holding Jessie when she was a baby.
I looked over at Robin who was still talking on her cell phone. She saw me looking at her and then turned her back to me. I slowly looked back into the stroller again. Her arm had worked itself free and she began to make a few more noises. I had no idea what was going on but grabbed the handle and rocked her back and forth how Robin had before.
I pulled the stroller closer to me and stopped it in it's place. I peered into it closer and found my hand moving on it's own. I wanted to scream and pull it back but something inside of me wouldn't let me. Jolts of electricity flew into my body as she grabbed my pinky with all her might. Her warmth circled around my finger and shot right up my arm.
"Hey there." I whispered to her out of nowhere. Her eyes looked in the direction of my voice intently. I checked Robin's location again and then looked back in the stroller.
"Hey Skye..... ummm it's uhh nice to meet you... uhhh I'm your father it seems.... kinda messed up I know." I babbled to her in astonishment about how calming it actually was. We sat in silence again as I became suddenly mesmerized by her every feature.
"Sorry about that Eli. Well, I see you two have met." Robin said as she joined me on the bench.
I nodded as I pulled my finger from Skye's grasp. I brought my arms to my chest and crossed them.
"So what do you think?" She asked.
I looked from Skye to Robin before I answered.
"She has my eyes." I stated in a daze. It was so unnerving to look into someone else's eyes only to realize you're looking back at yourself.
"That among other things." Robin added softly.
I felt a gust of wind pass by and shuddered a bit at the sudden cold.
"It's still a little cold out here. Do you want to go and get some breakfast or something?" I proposed.
It took me a while after that to figure out just what I was feeling about everything. My life had changed in so many ways that it was difficult to process it all. I was battling how to handle things with Robin. Communication between the two of was struggled and difficult no matter what we were talking about. I saw her and Skye a couple of times before I finally decided how to tell my parents. I'm still not sure how I managed to survive that afternoon at my mom's place.
"Is dad here yet?" I asked my mom once I came up from the basement otherwise known as my old room.
She looked up from her legal pad which she was scribbling on and shook her head.
"Not yet but you told him to pick you up at 2 so he should be here soon. Are you hungry? I could fix you something to eat if you want." She suggested to me.
I sighed suddenly feeling as if I'd gone back in time to when my mom wanted to take care of everything I did and have an active role in all my decisions. Who was I really kidding? She was still like that when it came to me. At least she loosened up a bit for Jessie's sake.
"No thanks, I'm not really hungry right now." I muttered as I mentally tried to calm the churning in my stomach to a bare minimum. I had to pace myself, after all my dad wasn't even there yet and nothing had been said.
I sat down across from mom at the table and let my eyes fall to the table. I studied the table cloth and all it's delicate stitches wondering why I'd never noticed them before. I hadn't noticed a lot of things before.
"Knock knock" Dad called out as he opened the front door. Even after all the time, I'm sure it was still weird for mom to hear him say that as he walked through the door.
"We're in the kitchen." Mom called back to him.
Dad strolled through the doorway and stopped before us with his keys in hand.
"Hi Karen, Eli you ready?" Dad asked.
"Hi Rick." Was all she said to him.
"Hey, ummm Dad can you sit down for a sec? I've got to talk to you guys about something." I said as loud as I could. It felt as though I was whispering hoping they wouldn't truly hear me.
"E, we've got to pick up Lily's car at the shop before they close." He pointed out as he glanced at his watch.
I felt my forehead wrinkle a bit and then said "I know, it won't take long."
Mom looked at me and held my gaze for a second or two longer than normal.
"Rick, just give him five minutes and then you guys can go." Mom declared as she turned to look him in the eye.
I heard my dad sigh as I closed my eyes trying to maintain my courage under fire. Dad took his old place at the head of the table. A place I remember him sitting for numerous breakfasts, lunches, and dinners. That is whenever he was home. I reached under the table and wiped my sweaty palms off on my jeans before I began my tale.
"So, umm I'm not really sure where to begin here mainly because everything is still a bit confusing to me. I've been trying to figure out the best way to tell you guys this, but it seems there is no best way to deliver this type of information." I started as I shifted my glances between the two of them. I noted their sudden concerned looks when I stated the latter portion of my sentence.
"Well, I only found out about this about a week or so ago. I didn't mean to hide it exactly but I just didn't know how to tell you. I also didn't want to tell you because... because.." I said trailing off. I was loosing my nerve even after I had rehearsed my speech millions of times in my head.
"What is it Eli?" Mom asked me.
"E, you know you can talk to me or your mom about anything." Dad stated trying his best to be encouraging.
I nodded as I took a deep breath and then it began.
"OK, I uhh I found out a week or so ago that I have a baby." I said and then felt the release inside as I let the information go. It was the first time I'd spoken those words out loud since I heard the news from Robin. I didn't realize my eyes had closed until the room went silent. I peered them open and was faced with the look of shock and horror on my parents faces.
Mom's pen fell from her hand as she gripped the table for support. Her mouth opened a jar but she was still speechless. I only hoped my dad would remain speechless but you can't get everything you hope for.
"What?" He asked me in disbelief. I know he thought he'd heard me wrong. But he didn't.
"I've got a kid dad." I stated as I looked him in directly in the eye.
"Are you serious? Eli, I can't believe this. What is going on with you?" He asked but I didn't dare respond. I knew he wasn't anywhere near ready for an explanation from me.
"How could this have happened? We've talked about safe sex how many times but still. When is it due?" He asked as he threw out more questions for me to keep track of.
I opened my mouth to try and respond but it was mom who interrupted me this time.
"Who is she? How did this happened? Rick how could you let this happen?" She demanded in a stern tone.
The buzz of both of them talking was becoming too much and I couldn't take it.
"God, if you two will just shut the hell up for maybe five seconds and let me talk maybe then you'll find out what's going on!!" I shouted at both of them.
"Excuse me Eli, that is no.." Mom started but was cut off by dad again.
"Eli that was completely out of line. How dare you speak to your mom or I for that matter in that tone!" He spat back at me.
I saw his body start to tense up even more with anger and his leg began to bounce. It was one of the many nervous habits we shared as father and son.
"How else am I going to get you guys to just listen to me? Do you have any idea how hard it was for me to talk to you about this?" I asked them.
"It damn well better be hard considering the circumstances." Mom muttered as she brought her head to her hands.
I shook my head in disbelief. I had hoped my parents would respond slightly different but they were just like old times.
"Well, being interrupted isn't exactly helping things here. Will you just let me get it out and then you can unload all your negative comments, screams and disappointments on me when I'm done?" I proposed but didn't wait for them to respond. I then began my long explanation hoping for cooperation.
"She didn't know it was mine until she had a blood test done a few weeks ago. The baby's blood type matches mine." I said as I concluded my story with a few parts skipped over. They were my parents but they didn't need to know exactly everything that took place.
"Are you sure the blood tests are correct? Eli, this is serious here. You need to make sure that the test wasn't fixed of tampered with. If she's going to take you to court or anything like that you need to know for sure what you're dealing with here." Mom said being the first to comment on my story.
"Mom, don't you think I don't know this is serious. We're talking about me having to take care of another life here." I replied.
"That's right Eli," Dad started in a loud tone and I knew I wouldn't like where he was going "This is a major responsibility that you are unable to handle. Eli, you can't even take care of yourself here and now you've got this kid to look after. I can't believe you would be so careless and irresponsible here."
"It was an accident." I exclaimed in my own defense. I hadn't intended to get Robin pregnant. Truth of the matter, I didn't remember all the details of sleeping together.
"An accident you're going to be paying for the rest of your life. This doesn't just affect you here. You've got me, your father, and Jessie roped into this." Mom stated.
"And not to mention Lily, Grace, and Zoe." Dad added.
I had tried my best to control my anger as much as possible but that was it.
"Dad you don't know if I can't handle it yet or not but of course you'll jump at the chance to write me off as the typical failure I am. There is one thing I am sure of. I won't always assume the worst of my kid!!" I yelled as I got up from the table.
"Eli! Come back here!"
"Eli, don't go!!!"
All came from behind me as I stormed out of the house, letting the front door slam behind me. I knew I had no car to hop into and speed away with but I had to get away somehow. I took off running down the street without looking back.
"Rick, what are we going to do about this?"
He looked over at her and shook his head.
"I have no idea."
"I can't believe this is our kid. It's not happening to someone else's son but to our son."
