At both horrified faces like he'd just verified the truth about Santa Artie had to elabortae
'you have to understand this was a woman who lost a very part of her soul that gave him her happiness and old life when they married,however turbulent their marriage was she idolised him,witnesses say she cried like she was trying to shed her pain through her eyes. Never quite recovered poor thing I think if it weren't for Onassis she would have become a recluse'
'oh god that's awful,they don't give her enough credit in the history books,its so sad'
'not to ask the obvious and break Myka's little sympathy speech there but how exactly do we ge close enough without being affected,no offence but I like my heart being big and pumping!'
'ok so I have these glasses which will allow you both to get close enough to the suit in just enough time to neutralise it because they have a signal cancellation field that will cancel the effect of the suit just long enough for you to liquidate it'
Artie's puns weren't quite as effective as any other gruff person saying it would have been it would be like replacing Yogi bear with a real grizzly.
Of course Pete still laughed because he had to be the teacher's goofy pet.
'so are these high spec glasses…or lens cams..ooh or the ones from the matrix?'
'the what?' Artie's knowledge of modern day media was pactically non-existant and when it came to dealing with Pete it became particularly challenging.
'look never mind these are the glasses,I hope you both take good care-
'uh Artie these are sunglasses as in I'm a tourist where is the nearest Kodak shop glasses and FYI Washington DC isnt that hot this time of year'
'no but you can test that theory another time because you're going to New Mexico'
'what?as in Roswell territory'
'don't be silly they have different warehouses or should I say storage facilities for different objects they collected over the of them were junk believe me I did my research but they just tend to store things they feel are possibly at threst to national security'
Myka understood Artie's little snipe at the government because even though the artifacts in the warehouse were potentially dangerous in the wrong hands,Artie had come to respect their power as an homage to the people who owned the government were treating them as threatening objects seemed insulting to Artie.
'who are our guides anyway,Mulder and Scully?'
'Pete I have come across ancient languages and dead languages I have understood better than you'
'get out of the wrong side of the bed there Mr Grumps'
'well since I have yet to master climbing through walls,one of which is beside my bed-
'ok guys can we save this act for a later more appropriate time please'
Using her hands as warning signals to Artie she looked like a airport traffic contoller but to Pete she appeared as breaking some kick ass rapper moves.
'um yeah… where was I?Right well you're on you're own on this one kids,this place is like the Bermuda triangle only without the scorpions…so you are looking for storage area 110.I have triangulated the coordinates as best I could'
At their drawn faces at the prospect of actually doing some work he continued
'its not easy navigating through what looks like barren desert and there arent any plaques or welcome mats to show where you are going,the most difficult part will be locating the artifact I think'
'wait there's a joke here that I'm missing,two agents walk into a warehouse from another warehouse…
'come on wise guy lets go' Myka pulled Pete from his seat to go pack
'wait Artie you havent perhaps rigged up a leash or collar by any chance have you just for me you know it could be useful controlling him'
This time Pete was dragging her through the door 'you know Id bring it back in one piece'
Artie had to giggle at them,saying that Myka and Pete were the best agents the warehouse has seen in a long time was a bit of an exaggeration but they had proved resourceful in the past and didn't run the first time they encountered mortal danger so they were loyal to the warehouse which was enough for the agents before them Myka and Pete grew on him and together with Claudia they made a big wacky family.
Speaking of Claudia he had to call in with her and see if her brother was taking good care of her.
