I'm sorry it took so long to finish this one. Needed to germinate or mold or something.

CHAPTER TWO

Alex sat in a corner and sipped her over priced and over complicated coffee concoction. She felt some guilt that she'd allowed Bobby to pay for it, but he'd insisted on buying in exchange for her presence.

"I know," he said as he opened his wallet. "That your time is valuable. And that you'd much rather be with your nephew…or shopping…or sleeping…or doing almost anything else."

"I don't know," Alex answered. "You and Nate are a pretty close."

Bobby glanced at her. "I…I can't imagine that I rate that highly…"

"Hey," Alex said gently but firmly. "We've talked about this. No putting yourself down."

Bobby smiled weakly at her. "Right," he said, but his voice failed to convince her.

"Any sign of trouble," Alex said as she staked out a table. "And I'm stepping in."

Bobby nodded and found his own station at a table closer to the door. Alex pretended to read a newspaper, and Bobby also created the illusion that he was engrossed in his reading material. But he used frequent sips of his coffee to look at the door and occasionally rubbed the back of his neck. To a neutral observer, Bobby might have seemed calm and collected, but Alex recognized the signs of his internal conflict.

"I hope," she thought. "This goes well. I'm not sure he could take it if…" She stiffened as a tall, slender young man slipped in the door and tentatively surveyed the restaurant. His short hair spiked as he pulled off his stocking cap. His eyes found Bobby, who stood slowly and cautiously.

"Please," Bobby prayed. "Help me to do the right thing for him. Remember…This isn't about you…It's about him…Helping him…"

Robbie approached Bobby apprehensively. The boy was tall, almost as tall as Bobby, and his sensitive face was a handsome, sensitive, older version of the boy Bobby knew from five years earlier.

"Detective Goren?" the young man said hesitantly and slowly extended his hand.

"Robbie…" Bobby responded with equal hesitation.

The two men shook hands, and Alex felt a twinge of hope.

"Thank you for seeing me," Robbie said after they sat. "And…would you mind calling me Bob? It's…It's what everyone calls me now."

"Of course," Bobby said. "Here…Let me get you something…"

Robbie glanced in Alex's direction. "Is your partner going to join us?"

"She can…But we can talk first. She's here mostly…mostly…"

"In case I go postal?" Robbie asked dryly.

"Yea," Bobby said after a beat.

They reached the counter, and Robbie quietly but firmly insisted on buying his own coffee. They collected their drinks and sat at a table some distance from Alex.

"I don't mind if she joins us," Robbie said.

Bobby studied the young man. Bobby desperately wanted Alex by his side, but he sensed Robbie would speak more freely without her presence. "It's ok," Bobby said. "She can join us later…"

"I…I…" Robbie clutched the cardboard cup tightly.

"Don't squeeze it too tight," Bobby said. "Or you'll have hot coffee all over your hands. I speak from personal experience."

Robbie smiled. "I had what I wanted to say all planned out…but now…it's not so easy…"

Bobby took a deep breath. "Just say it. Once you get started, it'll be easier."

"Ok." Robbie looked up at Bobby, who noted the boy's eyes still had the disconcertingly intelligent and sad look they contained six years ago. "First…Thank you…Thank you for talking to me…For talking to my aunt and uncle about the doctors and for helping them find them….Just…Thank you for everything."

Bobby was stunned and relieved. He hadn't expected gratitude to be one of things to come out of Robbie's mouth, let alone the first thing. "I…I didn't do that much," Bobby stammered.

Watching from her post, Alex nearly jumped and rushed to Bobby's side when she saw the shocked expression on his face.

"You…You did a lot," Robbie insisted. "And that's just what I know about. What I've figured out, and what my aunt and uncle told me. I bet you did a lot more…and…and it helped me…I mean…To start with…You got me away from him…You were the first one to notice how much trouble I was in…I…I don't know what I would've done…"

Across the room, Alex eased back in her chair.

Across from Robbie, Bobby struggled to find words that might comfort the boy.

"I…I need to know," Robbie said. "What I did…Is it…Is it why he killed her? It is, isn't it? When I lied about her letting me into the school? When I told him that she wouldn't pass me…That's why he killed her."

"Listen," Bobby said. "Think. What do your aunt and uncle tell you about that? What do the counselors and doctors tell you? Your own head…What does it tell you?"

"They…they tell me…He…He's the one who killed her…Who made the decision…But…" Robbie's voice shook. "But if I hadn't lied…" He looked at Bobby, and the boy's eyes pierced Bobby's heart. "I know," Robbie continued. "I know that you'll tell me the truth."

Bobby took a deep breath and leaned over the table. "I can't lie to you," he said softly. "It…It set him off. But…But when he confessed…He said he didn't plan to kill her…He wanted to talk to her to convince her to let you in the school…But he didn't expect her to be with someone."

"Why did he have the gun?" Robbie asked in despair.

"He told us he didn't remember picking it up…That he usually carried it for protection…"

"I don't believe that," Robbie said. "He planned everything. He stalked her…"

"I know," Bobby said. "But…I…I've interrogated a lot of people. Listened to a lot of confessions. I think he took the gun, and remembered it. But I also believe he just wanted to talk to her. And when he saw she was with someone…I think he panicked. Please…" Bobby reached across the table and gently gripped Robbie's arm. "Remember…You were a scared and sad eleven-year-old boy. He was a forty year old adult. He was the responsible one. Or should have been."

"But…but if I hadn't lied…"

"I know…I know…But you're not the person who killed those two people. You are not responsible. You are not guilty."

Robbie dropped his head on his arms. "But…But…What if I'm like him? What if I could kill someone?"

A vice surrounded and pressed Bobby's chest. For several moments, he couldn't think, couldn't breathe.

Across the room, Alex closely observed the conversation between Bobby and Robbie. The boy seemed to offer no threat; Bobby seemed to be comforting him. "Ok," she thought. "This is going well…The kid doesn't mean Bobby any harm…They're talking." She watched as Robbie's head slumped on the table, and Bobby jerked from some unseen blow. Alex jumped up, but before she could rush to Bobby, he recovered, saw her, raised a hand to stop her, and shook his head. Alex reluctantly sat.

Bobby's attention returned to Robbie. "You are not your father," he said softly. "He has something to do with what you are, but you are not him. His sins are not yours. You…You've already become a remarkable person…You've beaten some terrible odds." The words echoed in Bobby's head. His grip tightened on Robbie's arm, and the boy looked up at him.

"My…my…the man…who…well, to say he raised me would be a huge exaggeration," Bobby said. "But the man who was supposed to be my father…and the man who was my biological father…Neither of them…Was very good…One of them was…He was evil. But I'm not them. I'm not them. I'm not like them."

Robbie stared at him.

Bobby returned from inside his head. "And you're not your dad. A lot of other things have made you what you are. Your mom…Your aunt and uncle…Your cousins…Friends…Those things make you you. And from what I know about you….What I've seen…You're a good person…You were a bright boy…You're becoming a bright man…You know who you are." Bobby smiled sadly. "The fact you were brave enough to come here and talk to me…To face a fear…You've got a lot of guts."

Robbie wiped his eyes. "Thanks," he whispered. "I…I guess I knew that. But I needed to hear it from someone. Someone I trusted."

Bobby looked away so that the boy wouldn't see the tears forming in his eyes. He saw Alex studying him. Bobby swallowed and turned back to Robbie.

"Hey," he said, managing to hide the tension in his voice. "Think we can let Detective Eames in now?"

"Just…just one more thing." Robbie stared into his coffee.

"Yea?"

"He…He …I've sent his some cards and photos…My aunt and uncle have really…But I've never gone to see him."

"Does he want to see you?" Bobby asked.

"Yea…But…Part of me…I…I'm scared of him," Robbie confessed. "And part of me…Is really angry at him…I never want to see him again…And there're times when I want to go and show him…To tell him…To look at me…You…You…" Robbie's face grew white with anger. "I want to show him that I didn't need him…That I survived him." Robbie shook his head. "Pretty confused and petty, uh?"

Bobby smiled sadly. "No…I…I can understand all of those feelings."

Robbie looked at him skeptically.

"My Dad…At least the guy I thought…It was different from you…He didn't pay any attention to me…Except…Well, when he did…It wasn't good…And I'm not really sure I loved the man…There wasn't much to love about him…About half the time I hated him…But I still wanted his attention…" Bobby swallowed. He hadn't meant to reveal so much to Robbie.

"It sound like…like you felt about him kinda the way I feel about my dad," Robbie said.

"Yea…I'm sorry," Bobby said. "I didn't mean to…"

"It helps," Robbie said quickly. "To know someone else went through something like what I did…And came out ok."

Bobby smiled sadly. "Ok," he said as much to himself as to Robbie. "Is a relative term."

"Yea…I guess there's a lot I don't know," Robbie said. "But…You're a detective with the New York City Police Department. One of the coolest jobs ever…"

"It has its downside," Bobby said dryly. "But…It is pretty cool."

Bobby remembered the pride he felt when he took his oath as a police officer. He saw the admiration in Robbie's eyes. Bobby leaned forward.

"You decide about seeing your dad. I don't think that you need to see him. I don't think you owe him anything. You're ok. You're going to be ok." Bobby shrugged. "It would be a very generous thing to do. But you don't have to do it."

Robbie spun his empty cup. "Is it wrong…for me to want to see him because I'm curious?"

"No…Wanting to know about him…Nothing wrong with that. And it's ok to want to see him to show him you're ok."

Robbie smiled sadly. "I gotta admit…That's one reason I'd like him to see me." He spun the cup again. "If…If I go see him…After…Could I talk to you again?"

Bobby felt a strange mixture of humility and responsibility. "Of course…You can talk to me any time you want."

"Thank you." Bobby saw tears glisten in Robbie's eyes.

"Hey," Bobby said. "I think we'd better Detective Eames in on our talk, or she's going to explode."

Robbie swallowed and wiped his eyes. "Yea…"

Bobby waved at Alex, who bolted from her seat like a racehorse released from the gate. She'd watched the conversation between Bobby and Robbie with a wave of emotions. At several points, spurred by the grief and anger crossing both men's faces, Alex nearly rushed across the shop. Her heart rose and fell in her throat with Bobby and Robbie's changing moods. As she crossed the floor, Alex tried to gage the atmosphere. She stood uncertainly when she reached their table. To her great relief, Robbie—or Bob, as he gently requested her to call him—was charming and intelligent. Whatever storms had blown between him and Bobby, they were now over. It was only after several minutes that Alex noted a subtle but definite change in Bobby. He was calm and settled in a way Alex could just remember from days before her kidnapping and his mother's illness. Alex thought some of this resulted from the happy encounter with Robbie, but it seemed to go deeper than that.

After several coffees, an exchange of email addresses and phone numbers, and a promise to stay in touch, Robbie left Alex and Bobby with a firm handshake and a warm smile. He stood awkwardly, and Alex and Bobby saw the anguished boy he'd been, the sweet teenager he was, and the good, bright man he'd be.

"Thank you again," Robbie said softly. "Thank you for my life."

He adjusted his backpack on his shoulders and walked out of the coffee shop. Alex and Bobby watched his slender frame disappear into the crowd.

"I think," Bobby said. "He's going to be ok."

"Yea," Alex said. "And you?"

"Yea…I think I'm going to be ok, too." Bobby looked at Alex, who was thrilled that his calm and clear eyes met hers. "Talking to Robbie…Bob…" Bobby smiled. "Telling him he wasn't what his father was…That he's more than what his father made him…That he could be what he wanted to be…I may have convinced myself of that too."

Alex reached out and wrapped her small hands around Bobby's large ones. "I've always known that."

"Well," Bobby said. "There's a saying that you can help yourself by helping others. Maybe I figured that out."

Alex smiled. "Bright man."

END