Thanks for all your reviews; they truly make my day! I hope you enjoy chapter two. Sorry if it's a bit fluffy (read: mushy).
The next day after work, Olivia visited Joshua again. Alex had gotten the Dillons arraigned and remanded to custody, and although Olivia had gotten everything she needed out of the little boy, she had the inexplicable urge to go visit him and make sure he was all right.
Joshua was curled up on his side, clutching the blankets to his chest. He looked up and smiled weakly when he saw Olivia. "Hi, 'Livia," he whispered.
"Hey, sweetie," said Olivia, perching on the edge of Joshua's bed. "I've got a present for you."
Joshua started to tremble and covered his face with his hands. "No, thank you," he said quietly.
Olivia tried not to feel hurt. She'd gone out and got Joshua a teddy bear and she'd thought he would love it. "Don't you want to know what it is?"
Joshua began to cry. He started to take off his shirt, but Olivia put a hand on his to stop him.
"Josh, Josh. What are you doing?" She didn't understand.
"I have to – I have to show you I deserve it," he sobbed, his shivering increasing exponentially. "Otherwise – otherwise I don't get what you got for me."
"No, sweetie," Olivia assured him, trying not to cry herself. "No, no, no. I got you something because I wanted to get you something, no strings attached. You don't need to do anything in return, Josh. And I would never, never ask you to get undressed or touch you before giving you something. That's not okay."
Joshua wiped a hand across his eyes. "I – I'm sorry," he whimpered, burying his head in a pillow. "I'm sorry, 'Livia."
"No, sweetie, it's okay. It's okay. I would never hurt you, Joshua. You're safe here. It's okay."
Joshua nodded. Olivia hesitated, then started to gently rub the little boy's back until his sobs gradually subsided. Finally, he looked up at the detective. "'Livia, can I – can I have my present?"
"Of course, sweetie," said Olivia. She reached into her purse and pulled out a teddy bear. She handed it to Joshua. "For you."
Joshua's eyes went wide and he stared at the bear for a moment without taking it. Then his eyes darted up to Olivia. "For – for me?" he asked, hardly daring for voice the thought.
"Yeah, Josh. For you."
He took the bear from her hands and hugged it tightly to his chest. "Thank you, 'Livia," he whispered. "Thank you."
"Can I give you a hug?" asked Olivia, knowing instinctively that she should make sure it was okay before hugging Joshua.
He nodded and Olivia wrapped her arms around him. He buried his head in her shoulder and salty tears soaked Olivia's shirt, but she didn't mind. She just held the little boy tightly, because they both needed it.
A/O/A/O
She went straight home after visiting Joshua. Alex greeted her at the door. "I made you dinner," she said with a smile.
"Thanks, baby," said Olivia wearily. "But I'm not hungry." She hung up her coat and started for the bedroom.
Alex followed her. "What's wrong, Liv? Did you have a hard day at work?"
Olivia sighed and lay down on the bed. Alex hesitated, then sat down beside her and started to gently rub the detective's back.
It took a few minutes, but the touch gradually calmed Olivia down and she said, "You remember the little boy I was telling you about, Joshua?"
"Sure. We – well, I – got his parents arraigned today, remember?"
Olivia sighed again, arching into Alex's touch, needing to be close to her girlfriend right now. "I went to see him again today." Alex didn't say anything; she continued to tenderly massage Olivia's back, and the detective hesitated before continuing. "I brought him a teddy bear. He'd never had one before and I thought it would be a good gift. I gave it to him and he started crying and he asked me what he had to do to get it. I said he didn't have to do anything, but he didn't believe me and he started to take off his clothes, and then I understood. Whenever someone's tried to give something to him in the past, they've wanted him to do – that – before he could get it." She couldn't even bring herself to say the words; they were too clinical. She needed to show Alex the sentiment, not the facts. She felt terrible for scaring Joshua like that.
Alex kissed her forehead and wrapped her arms around Olivia. She understood. "It's not your fault, Liv," she said softly; the words Olivia needed to hear. "You didn't know."
Olivia stubbornly shook her head. "I should have."
"Olivia," said Alex firmly. "You've known this little boy one day. How would you have known?"
Olivia sighed again and leaned against her girlfriend, too emotionally drained to argue.
"This one's hit a nerve, huh?" remarked Alex.
"If you saw this kid, you'd feel the same way. He's five years old, Alex! Just five. And he's been in sixteen different homes since he was a baby. Sixteen, Alex! Sixteen."
"We deal with a lot of crap in our line of work," agreed Alex. Then she hesitated, unsure exactly how to phrase this. "But why has this one hit you so hard?"
Olivia thought about it. "I don't know," she answered honestly. She didn't quite understand it herself. "It's just – this kid – he's five years old and he's so resilient."
"You were a resilient five-year-old," commented her girlfriend.
Olivia realized she was right. "I guess that's it," she admitted. "He reminded me of myself. I mean, I haven't been through half of what he has," she said hastily when she saw the look on Alex's face. "But the –" She faltered, unsure how to describe it.
"The strength," supplied Alex, caressing Olivia's cheek. "He's strong, Liv. And so were you. So are you. You see in him what I see in you. That's one of the things that makes you so special."
Olivia smiled ruefully. "Okay, cut that out. I didn't tell you this so we could have some huge pity party."
"I know, but sometimes I think you forget. Sometimes I think you just need to hear – you need me to tell you – how much I love you and how special you are."
Olivia gave her a kiss. "I love you, too, baby."
"How about you take me to meet Joshua tomorrow? I'm going to need to talk to him sooner or later anyway, to prep him for his testimony."
The detective hesitated. "Okay, but go easy on him. He's just a little boy. Don't ask him ten billion questions right away."
Alex looked offended. "Thanks for the ever so helpful advice, but I've been doing this just as long as you have. I know how to deal with child victims."
"No, that's not it," said Olivia quickly. "It's just – he's special, Alex. I don't know how to explain it; I just feel it. He is."
"Okay." Alex scooted closer to her girlfriend so that their bodies were touching. She kissed Olivia's hair and repeated, "I love you, Liv."
"I love you, too," murmured Olivia before drifting off to sleep.
I hope this wasn't too fluffy/mushy for you. Review for chapter three!
