I don't own twilight or any of the characters in twilight; they are all courtesy of Stephanie Meyer. But later on there will be characters introduced that belong to me.
Chapter: 2 Not even blood
EPOV:
10 years that's how long it's been since I left my heart, my life and my very existence with Bella. Leaving her was something that I never thought I was able to do. Just the memory of seeing those warm brown eyes melt when I told her we were leaving was enough to drive me over the edge. I just couldn't believe that Bella would let her faith in me be broken so easily. No more than 10minutes was it had taken to see that she had believed my lie to fullest. It angered me to even think of it. After all the times I told her I loved her and that I couldn't exist without her, didn't she believe me when I pronounced my everlasting love to her?
It may have been true that I was able to leave her behind, but with her I left Edward behind to. After we had left I was nothing compared to the Edward I used to be. I was totally useless. I wasn't able to speak hardly to my own family; I couldn't bare their thoughts of concern or worry over me. I didn't deserve these feelings not when I had destroyed the heart of an angel. I would hunt more than 3 times a week, just to get out of the house and be able to drown in my pain without it destroying Jasper as well. Even when I was hunting, when my mind was suppose to be focused on the prey. I still saw her. Her heart shaped face, and long silky brown hair, and those luscious full lips. But most of all her eyes, the only eyes that had ever captivated me.
Once we had left I had departed on my own. Victoria was still out there and she was still a threat to my Bella. Even if I wasn't able to keep her safe and secure in my arms, I would still track down any threat to her well being. So I followed a lead all the way to South America but soon the scent began to fade and eventually vanished completely. It became obvious to me that she hadn't been here in sometime. Giving up I returned to Texas to try retrace my steps to where her scent had last been the strongest. But each lead I followed always ended in a dead end.
After a few years of unsuccessfully tracking her, I decided to give in to the pleads of my family and move back in with them. Alice promised to keep an eye out for any decisions Victoria would make that would endanger Bella. I began to relax slightly as Alice's visions always confirmed Victoria's movements far
past the equator in a remote region of South America. Obviously I didn't have the slightest of gifts for tracking.
As for us we had lived in many places the first few years but soon settled in small town just north of Vancouver, Canada. Living in a house much like that to the one in Forks, a grand three story Victorian house. This place was much like Forks. Clouds almost always darkened the sky and the rain was more than frequent. Forests seemed to surround the town from all sides. After finishing High School there and attending another one of Rosalie and Emmett's wedding the entire family excluding me had already made up their minds to move back to Forks. Since I hadn't been actively tracking anymore, I just curled up into a ball and let the misery have me. Once I was informed of this I instantly disapproved, letting my temper and pain get the best of me.
I went berserk yelling that we were never to return there and that we'll only put Bella in danger by being there. I even attacked Emmett once after he had mentioned that I should get over myself and just return to Bella. But as quickly as I had reached for him I was pinned to the floor by Alice, Jasper, and Carlisle. Jasper had instantly sent out wave after wave of calming emotions. Soon I just gave in and feel limp under their restraining arms. Once I was in the right mind again Esme began explaining the beneficial reasons of going back.
There was a new hospital that had offered Carlisle a job. Our old house was still waiting there. We could start school again in the fall. But more importantly Esme wanted me to see Bella again. She wanted me to return to the person I had been before we had left. Everyone wanted that, everyone including Rosalie wanted to see Bella again. I wasn't convinced that she would want to see us, or rather me at all.
A month later we had already completely moved back in. It had token 3 weeks of persuasive arguing to get me here again. Alice was bouncing off of the walls in her mind with excitement. She had no patience to wait; she wanted to see Bella now. As soon as I had finished fixing up my old room, Alice was in the doorway staring me down. She I and I both knew what this was about.
"Edward come with me, im going to see Bella." Alice spoke sweetly. I stared into her golden eyes for what seemed like hours, until I finally spoke in my regular monotone voice.
"Bella doesn't want to see me Alice; I had told her I didn't love her anymore." Alice's eyes widened in shock at what I had said. I suppose I had never told anyone what I had said to Bella that afternoon.
Instantly Alice was in front of me staring me down, with fierce eyes. I didn't look away; I deserved much more than just this glare. Alice soon broke away and looked out the huge window in my room.
Blankly she stared "I don't care what you've said to her Edward, you know that Bella loves you. She will always love you and there is nothing you can do to change that." Her voice was causal and dark.
I tried to smile at her for the first time in years, but it turned to a grimace of pain. "Why would Bella want to see me, How could Alice still think that she loved me after what I've done." I asked myself. A deep sigh was the only thing that could come to my lips. Alice wasn't going to give up until she got what she wanted, I could see that. Maybe if we went to see Bella and she rejected me I would feel better knowing that I had gotten the punishment that I deserved. But that still wouldn't change how I felt for her. Even if she rejected me now, I would still love her and only her for eternity. As a resolution came into my eyes Alice squealed with joy and raced out the door to get ready.
We took my Volvo, seeing as how it was the fastest. As I drove down her street again I got this aching pain in my stomach as the misery began to swallow me. I doubted Bella would still be here with Charlie but if she didn't maybe he would shed some light onto where she lived now. As I parked on the street in front of the house I was taken back. Nothing had changed at all. Charlie's cruiser was still in the drive way and the house was still the same as the last time I had saw it. Alice gracefully jumped out of the car prancing over to the porch waiting for me. The rest of my family decided not to come so that if she was still here we didn't over whelm her all at once. As I walked around the car towards Alice's impatient face I smiled for the first time in 10 long years. My family had given me smiles of encouragement before we had left thinking how wonderful it would be to see Bella again. I couldn't agree with them more right now, even if she didn't want at least I would be able to stare into the eyes of an angel once again.
As I took my place beside Alice she gave me one last smile before knocking on the door. Inside I could hear Charlie mumbling complaints about having to get up. Alice was about to explode from excitement as Charlie opened the door. As soon as Charlie saw me his eyes became dark with anger but he lightened a little as he saw little Alice standing there beside me.
"Charlie!" Alice exclaimed happily.
"Alice it's good to see you again." His voice was deeper now, showing his age truthfully.
"Edward" he addressed me formally in a darker tone.
"Sir" I replied nicely.
It was then I took a notice to his aged features he hadn't changed much but wrinkles were beginning to take more prominent shapes. His hair had begun to silver slightly and he had a darkened five o'clock shadow. His eyes had begun to sag and dark shadows had appeared under them. It was obvious that he had problems sleeping at night. His breath carried the scent of alcohol. That explained why he didn't give us a double take and notice that we hadn't changed at all in ten years.
"Is Bella still around?" Alice asked in her innocent voice.
Immediately Charlie's mind answered coldly with a 'NO she hasn't been here for years'. My mood fell instantly at this. But then again I never thought she would stick around here either.
"No Alice I haven't seen or heard from Bella in 10years." Charlie replied gravely.
Alice eyes widened to the size of saucer plates "Why? What happened?" she asked carefully. I couldn't believe that Bella wouldn't talk to her father for 10 years.
Charlie took a deep breath before answering; this was going to be hard for him, I could tell. "I don't know. Five days after your family left Bella disappeared in the night. There was no trace of her at all. Nothing not even blood." He choked on the last word. "She's dead Alice."
Then it hit me this was my fault. Bella had vanished just mere days after we had left. This never would have happened if I had been here to protect her. "I should have been here to protect her." My inside screamed. Alice was breaking down; her mind was spinning with remorse, regret, and pain. Just before Alice feel to her knees I caught her and lifted her up to my arms. I don't know how I was even able to do that without breaking down myself. Alice began to dry-sob into my jacket. I could see she needed to get home.
"Thank you for your time Charlie." I replied monotone once again. He and I both knew there was nothing more to say.
He merely nodded his head and turned, closing the door as I walked away back to the car. Quickly I buckled Alice up and began the long silent drive back home. Alice didn't move from the position she was in. Her eyes were glazed over with pain as she stared out the window. Every now and then she gives a choked up sob and returns to her zombie like state. I was no different; I had begun dry sobbing as soon as I was in the car. The guilt the love the hate the anguish that ran through me was nothing compared to the misery that engulfed my mind as soon as I had found out that my love, my reason, my angel was gone. My thoughts were all on her now. Not that they weren't before. But this time I had to deal with the fact that Bella had gone missing just a MERE FIVE DAYS AFTER I HAD LEFT! This was my fault.
As I pulled up in front of our house I could see that Alice wasn't going to recover anytime soon. So I pulled her out of the car as gently as I could and walked up the drive and into the house. It was only a matter of seconds before the entire family had appeared in front of me. Jasper was the first to speak as he saw Alice.
"Alice!" he ran up to her lifting her from my arms into his own. She didn't speak; she still had her pained blank mask on. Carlisle was beside Jasper instantly as was the rest of the family. Their expressions rained form panic to confusion.
"Alice! Alice speak. Say something. What's wrong?" Jasper's voice came with rushing words as he saw his love paralyzed in pain. Alice blinked once before turning her head into Jaspers chest and dry sobbing again.
"Bella" she choked out in between invisible tears. My family all reared their heads from Alice and bore their gaze onto me now. I had just been staring at the floor, too consumed by pain to even make a move from the place I had stopped inside the door. "I'm going to my room." I whispered it was almost too faint that I wasn't even sure if they heard it. But none the less I flashed up the stairs and into my room closing the door that I hoped would keep me from going to pieces. I was a fool to even think that I could handle this, that I could leave her alone. It was my fault. "Bella I'm so, so sorry." I cried inside. Those were the only words I would speak for the next 4 months until School would start again.
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