It is All My Fault
Chapter 2 (EPOV)
Bella closed the door to my room and I rethought the conversation. She was so bitter, the only reason she can't heal is because she won't let anyone in. Just telling her how my parents died made me feel better and I didn't even give her details. I sighed, I would help her any way I could, if I see her again then I would help her get better. No one should have to face this kind of pain alone. Bella was a good person, I don't know how I knew but I did. She was beautiful inside and out. Someone knocked on my door and I silently prayed she came back to let me help her. I opened the door to a small pixie girl she was shaking. The girl was crying as I let her in and sat her down on my bed she had black hair that formed a spiky halo around her head.
"I-I-I'm s-s-sorry I got-t lost-t. Then s-some girl made f-fun of my clothes." The girl squeaked out.
"Don't worry about it. I'm Edward and you are?" I said trying to be nice.
"Alice, I haven't been here that long, just a week. I spent it in my room crying about my parents giving me up but today I decided to get out of my room but now I don't know how to get back." The girl said calming herself down. I felt bad for Alice I spent my time sitting in my room crying but I haven't left.
"I'll help you get back to your room. Why did your parents give you up?" I ask wanting to help her the way Bella helped me.
"I get feelings about certain things, like I sometimes know when something bad will happen and it scared my parents to death. I knew if I came in here someone would help me. That girl leaving here, she is going with bad people. The people who adopt her are going to be mean or something is going to happen when she goes with them, whatever it is isn't going to be good." Alice whispered. Bella was going with mean people and she is going to try and get kicked out of the house. Oh god what if they hurt her or something? She doesn't deserve that she is already going through enough pain as it is. I must have looked mad because when I glanced back at Alice she was shaking and sort of cringing away from me like I was about to explode. "I understand if you don't believe me and think I'm a freak."
"No I believe you. I just don't like to think someone is going to hurt Bella she is a good person and she has already suffered enough." I can't believe Alice thought I was going to make fun of her for her gift. I know it sounds ridiculous but she is telling the truth, I can tell. My mom used to joke that I was a mind reader.
"That was Bella?"
"Yeah."
"People around here say she killed her own parents but no believed her so instead of jail she got sent here."
"Don't believe everything you hear. Bella loves her parents and I know she wouldn't be able to hurt anyone or anything." I almost laughed at the thought of people actually believing in the rumor.
"How did her parents die then?"
"She wouldn't tell me, but I know she isn't capable of murder." I said harshly. Alice was crying hard I hope she didn't think I was I directing my anger toward her. "Alice you know I didn't mean to sound so harsh? That I'm not mad at you?" She nods still crying hard. "Then whats wrong?"
"I just thought about not having any family anymore. I don't know what to do anymore, I feel alone." Alice says sounding deafeted.
"You don't have to be alone. We can be each others family." I say hoping to comfort her.
"What about when someone adopts you then I'll just be alone again."
"No I won't leave you if you don't get adopted with me then I will refuse to go. I couldn't leave my little sister." I smile at her and she grins back.
Alice doesn't leave my room that night. All evening we talked about ourselves getting to know one another. Asking questions, she was smart and energetic. Alice was bubbly and absolutely loves to shop. She told me her parents are very religious and thought she was posesed so they tried to beat the deveil out of her. They didn't hit her often and they havent hit her in a long time. Alice said she only got two really good beatings in her life. I told Alice everything there was to know about me. I wasn't very interesting or cool, I was kind of a nerd. I like the paino and classical music and I love to read. I told her how much I love my parents and how they died. I told her everything, almost.
"What about Bella?" Alice asked after a pause.
"Bella…" I didn't know what to say about Bella. She was beautiful and sad. She thought she would be replacing her parents if she gets adopted. Bella is caring and bitter. I have no idea what to say about Bella. Luckly Alice didn't press the matter, she seemed to understand that I didn't know what to say about her. Eventually Alice fell asleep on my bed and I slept on the floor.
Bella was lying on the floor with her face bruised and bleeding she was screaming but I couldn't hear her, it was like the sound was turned off. She was in this room the walls were white with little splatters of blood all over, The door was black and I couldn't tell if it was wood or metal, the door knob was dripping red. There were no windows and Bella was completely alone screaming for help. All of a sudden a man in a suit burst through the door with a murderous glare on his face. Bella cringed into the floor and started to crawl away from the man. It seemed like he enjoyed that, he stormed over to Bella and grabbed her by the hair and through her into the wall leaving a new splatter of blood, Bella screamed again as the man kicked her in the ribs.
"HELP, EDWARD, HELP ME!!!!" Bella screamed as the sound was turned on. I tried to tell her that I would help her but I couldn't I was frozen. I couldn't move and I couldn't speak but I sure could hear her as the man started to hit her harder her voice rose. I want to kill the man or distract him so Bella can get away. I screamed trying to get his attention. Bella didn't seem to notice me as she whimpered on the floor crumpled in pain, but the man heard me. He looked straight at me and small smile on his face walked up to me until I could feel his breathing on my face.
"Why won't you save her, Edward? She is in a lot of pain but you still won't help her. I'm going to kill her and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it." The man laughed in my face sent another kick in Bella's side before leaving. I stared after him wishing there was some way to help Bella.
"Edward why didn't you help me? It's your fault you didn't warn me, why did you want me to be in pain?" Bella whispered. I looked at her she was lying in a puddle of blood there was some kind internal injury that was making the bleeding speed up. I cried she was right if I would have warned her, she wouldn't be in pain. It is all my fault.
I jolted up right screaming sweet pouring down my face and back. It was a dream but it felt so real. My breathing was heavy and uneven but I could not seem to get under control. It looked so real I could have sworn it was real. I looked up at Alice asleep in my bed even though my screaming she seemed so peaceful. I need to take my mind off the dream and Alice seemed like the perfect distraction.
I know most people wouldn't believe in her ability but somehow I knew it was true just like I knew Bella was a good person. I have always been an excellent judge of character, I just knew if some one was lying or worried or a bad person and never once have I been wrong. I was told to always trust my gut and my gut told me Alice could see the future and she knew Bella was being adopted by bad people but I had no way of helping her. Like Bella even wanted my help she probably would have laughed at me and said that I was crazy. I looked up at the clock it was one thirty I was too late anyway.
I woke Alice up and we went down to breakfast, a lot of people stared like we were freaks. I sat at the table with my bagel as I waited for Alice. A little boy with crazy blonde hair and a pale face, he had a scar over his left eyebrow and on his chin. He sat next me and just looked at the table. It was odd because everyone else is staring at me but I liked him he understood that I didn't want people gawking at me like I was a side show.
"Hi I'm Jasper Hale your Edward Mason, I heard some terrible rumors about you but I really don't think there true I mean I doubt you could cut your parents brake lines in order to make them crash." The blonde boy said still staring at the table. I wanted to scream at him and be angry but I couldn't he was making me calm. I could tell he was shy and it took a lot for him to talk to me. I also could tell he was very nice and caring but is also very sad. Jasper felt like a altogether good person.
"Yeah I'm Edward but I didn't cut my parents brakes they swerved to avoid hitting a deer. I'm glad you didn't believe the rumors, how did you get here?" I asked. I got better every time I told some one how my parents died. Jasper looked up and gave a small smile.
"Same as yours except me and Rosalie were in the back seat. That's how I got the pretty marks on my face. Rose is lucky she didn't get any scars." I nodded and easy conversation started. The day went on great Alice and I found her room. I also met Jasper's sister Rosalie she is a really pretty blonde who like Jasper is pale.
Before I knew it a week passed still no word from Bella I was really worried about her. I went to the lady at the front desk to ask her to send a social worker to check on her but she said she was fine. I was apparently over reacting as everyone aside from Alice said. The nightmare just kept getting worse I had it at least once a week. Last night was the worst Bella never acknowledged by presents before but in this dream she begged for me to help her to get her out of that place and I couldn't and all through the beating she stared at me screaming that it was my fault and if I would have warned her then she wouldn't be in so much pain. I couldn't say it was already to late and I would try to help her. The last part of the dream is always the worst though when she looks up at me and with her dying breath ask me why, why I didn't help her, why I didn't try harder and still I couldn't say anything or even tell her I'm sorry.
I haven't told anyone not even Alice about the dreams. I felt like she would laugh at me and turn her back on me. Even though I know Alice would never do that to me. I've been in the orphanage for four months now I cried myself to sleep and woke screaming but aside from that it was great. Alice really is like a little sister to me and Jasper and Rosalie were my best friends I doubted we would ever get adopted. I wouldn't leave Alice and Alice wouldn't leave Jasper they like each other, and Jasper most defiantly wont leave Rose and vise versa. If all four of us insisted on staying together then we were going to have a hell of a time getting adopted.
Some of what Bella said was true I was a tougher person then I used to be. The pain was always there to but it did fade a bit as the time went on I knew it would never be completely gone but it would lessen. The worst part wasn't seeing others happy it was seeing other people be upset over stupid reasons like the little girl couldn't get the toy she wanted and screamed that she hated her mom and ran away. That pissed me off, the orphanage lady took a special liking to me and she got a piano for the orphanage which no one aside from me played. That's where I sat today sitting on the bench staring at the keys thinking over the melody that just flowed out of my fingers. It was so sad and I knew that Bella inspired it, it was her lullaby. I sighed I thought about her all the time hoping she would come back to me and be perfectly okay.
Suddenly I heard a whooshing sound and turned around just in enough time to catch the foot ball that was flying at my head. A boy who had some big muscles and dark brown curly hair, he must have been around eleven or twelve. He jogged up to me a took the ball back and smiled apologetically.
" Sorry bro I'm Emmet." The big guy said smiling.. I could tell he was a guy who loved to get into things and be goofy but could be trusted with all your problems. Very protective and loyal to his friends and family. He seem like a good guy.
"No problem I'm Edward Mason. Nice throw tons of power!! Then again seeing you now I'm not surprised you are huge dude." I said smiling and tossing the ball into his arms. I could tell he was thinking about something hard like trying to decide on something difficult.
"I like you man. How would you feel about being my new brother? I'm here with my adopted parents and I get to pick out my siblings." Emmet said grinning. I would love to go home with Emmet but I doubt he would want the others too.
"I'd love to Emmet but the thing is if you want to adopt me you have to take Alice, Jasper and Rosalie. They are my family and we promised we wouldn't leave without each other. I totally understand if you don't want us but I'd love to be your brother and I'm sure you'd love the others they are all really cool." I was silently hopping Emmet would take us all but I knew the odds weren't in my favor.
"Four altogether. Great saves me the trouble of having to throw this ball at a bunch of people to strike up a good conversation. Round up the others and meet us by the front the door I'll introduce ya'll to the folks and then you pack tonight and leave tomorrow morning. See you in a few!!!" Emmet said walking off to talk to his parents. Then it hit me I was getting adopted, I got us all adopted. I found us a family. Bella's words ran through my head "Then your going to disgrace your parents by forgetting them. I'm sorry I shouldn't have come in here. You just like them your parents love you and you replace them you're going to be happy. I thought maybe you wouldn't be as heartless as the rest of them. Your just as weak, I will not replace my parents ever." I knew what she said wasn't true but it still hurt. I pushed the unhappy thoughts from my head and ran upstairs to find everyone in my room playing cards. I burst into the room and I must have looked crazy because Alice stood up and ran over.
"Edward, what's wrong? Are you okay?" Alice said upset. She still felt like everyone was just going to up and leave her one day. I scooped her up in a hug spinning her around laughing.
"I got adopted!!" I yelled as I sat her down. She had tears in her eyes and a small smile on her pixie face.
"I'm happy for you Edward. I'll miss you!" Alice burst into tears and I rethought what I said and realized she thought just me was getting adopted.
"No you won't Alice I couldn't leave my little sister. I got us ALL adopted by this really cool guy named Emmet and his parents!! We need to get down there to meet his parents." I smiled as her face lit up. All of us ran down stairs to the front door where Emmet was waiting with a tall man with his blonde hair slicked back he was very handsome. Like a movie star, next to him was a tall thin woman with long mahogany hair in loose curls and a heart shaped face. She was absolutely beautiful and looked very kind. I then tried to read them and noticed that the man was very even tempered and kind very gentle and a little strict. The woman was very loving and kind gentle and giving, they both seemed like great people.
"Mom, Dad this is Edward the cool guy I met and his close friends that he won't leave behind. I'll let him introduce them see as I don't know which one is which." Emmet grinned as I stepped forward.
"This is Alice Brandon, my sister, Jasper Hale, my best friend and Alice's boyfriend, and his sister and one of my best friends Rosalie Hale. And I'm Edward Mason." I said with a crooked grin.
"Pleased to meet you all, I'm Carlisle and this is my wife Esme. I heard you call Alice your sister but you both have different last names?" I smiled at them both as Alice stepped forward, she loved telling this story. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed Rose and Emmet sending each other flirty looks. It looks like I'll be the only single one.
"We aren't actually related but a week after I was here I went out exploring and got lost. People started making fun of me and I saw a beautiful girl coming out of his room and I knocked on his door. Edward answered and let me in and comforted me like the gentleman he is. Well we were talking and all of a sudden I started crying again Edward asked what was wrong and I told him I was sad because I was alone and he told me we would be each others family. As if that's not nice enough I told him I would just be alone again when he got adopted you know what he did? He told me that he wouldn't leave his sister. Edward is the most caring out of all of us." I blushed a little at Alice's praise and looked at Carlisle and Esme, they were glowing like they just won the lottery.
"That is so sweet. I'm very proud of your choices Emmet if you want you can pick out another friend we said you can pick out five." Esme said beaming. I looked down remembering Bella's promise to try to get kicked out sooner but I didn't say anything for all I know she could be perfectly happy with her family.
"Um, Esme Carlisle, I uh know you are giving us a lot already but there is this girl she is really close to Edward and she said she is going to be coming back here soon do you uh by any chance think you could leave the place open for her?" Rosalie said shocking me. I told her how much I missed Bella and how she was going to get herself kicked out of her home to come back but I didn't think she paid attention. I looked up unsurely at my new foster parents to measure their expressions. They looked thought full but that could mean anything.
"Of course I think that's very nice but why is she coming back?" They were looking at me and I swallowed figuring it was okay to tell them.
"She is the one who helped me when my parents died. When I asked her how hers died she wouldn't tell me but she looked like she wanted to so badly. She hugged me as she cried she told me that I would get better and she wouldn't. I don't think she ever told anyone what happened and never got any help. I promised that when she got back I'd help her. Bella is so beautiful but so sad. She said that if she got adopted and accepted another family than she would be replacing her parents. So she is going to try to get kicked out of her home to come back and see me. That was four months ago and I haven't heard from her but I don't think she went with nice people. I'm worried about her and no one will check up on her." I was crying by the end and Esme pulled me into a hug telling me they would adopt her when she got back and that I'd help her be happy again.
After that they sighed our paper work and said they would pick us up in the morning at twelve. I went upstairs to pack my few belongings before sitting on my bed and just staring into space waiting for sleep to find me. I wondered what Bella would say when she got here and I wasn't there. I jumped up as I thought about writing her a letter to tell her that I would come for her and help her. I sat up all night writing her that letter. I finished at nine thirty in the morning so I went down stairs to give the letter to the office lady to give to Bella if she comes back she promised me she would. I ate breakfast quickly before jumping in the shower and packing the rest of my last minute items. I woke everyone up and after running around making sure we all had everything we brought are bags by the front door. Twelve sharp came and Carlisle and Emmet came to pick us up we loaded everything in the trunk of a truck Carlisle borrowed from a friend. I came inside for my last bag and stopped on the doorstep to turn around and take one last at the orphanage that was my home for the past four months. This was it I was never coming back, I was starting a new chapter in my life. I smiled and headed for the truck.
That was six years ago and I've yet to have word from Bella. I still think about her often and have the nightmare at least once a week. We call every year but always to late Bella has been adopted seven times and kicked out every time. I was losing hope I would most likely never see her again. Alice is very optimistic she says that Bella and I will be together in the end. But the future can always change nothing is set in stone.
I think I did an okay job on this chapter, What about you? What did you think? Review!! I know I didn't put a disclaimer on the top of this chapter but I'm put it in my fist one and I don't plan I saying I don't own Twilight every chapter it makes me sad. Tell me if I rock or sucked. I plan on switching POV between EPOV and BPOV every other chapter but not the same event in both views. What do think? I want to know!!! J
