I wanted to thank you guys who took their time and gave me their feedback on the first chapter. I guess I have decided to continue with this story, as long as there's a demand for it.
P.s. excuse the little 'spacegoat' from the last chapter. It went back to space now...
The driving force of this fic is Alec risking it all for Magnus and his inner struggles along the way.
Fragility of Happiness
What was going on?
The Ops Center was in a state of chaos – everyone either rushing in to see what all the fuss was about or others, that were lucky enough to be the first ones, were already forming plans, hushing among themselves of how they were going to take down the High Warlock.
It was no secret that Magnus was one of the most powerful warlocks to be still alive. He wouldn't be as easy to take down as a regular demon, and that knowledge put the Shadowhunters in the Institute in a tight spot. They were expected to capture a warlock that most of them didn't have the skills to.
Some, though, used the opportunity to gossip about one of the Lightwoods being involved with the said warlock and how they could not trust or be expected to follow orders from a traitor's lover.
Isabelle could barely keep her temper at bay - disgusted by the shallowness of her fellow Shadowhunters. She only felt glad that Alec wasn't there to see it.
As more people started to gather, Isabelle took it as an opportunity to sneak away into a corner where she took her phone out, ready to demand answers from Alec and others. Surely something had gone wrong while they were being questioned by Aldertree.
She already went as far as Alec, what's going o- on her screen when a sudden thought, stopped her from typing further.
There was one other person that should be contacted first.
Quickly erasing her message, she began typing again.
TO MAGNUS:
Surrounded by the company of not one, but two cats (a Persian and a mixed breed black and white coated cat), Magnus sat comfortably in his rather extravagant seventeenth century armchair. In the times like these – when he was explicitly feeling the sense of longing for his Shadowhunter - those soft feline creatures were his only sanctuary.
The persian one was a rather peculiar being – Magnus came to realize early on that the best way of taming it was to lull it into thinking it was the one dominating the Warlock and not the other way around. Suppose it was true for all the feline creatures out there but there was always an exception – the black and white coated cat more times than not would throw away its pride for an excellent back massage.
Magnus couldn't complain. He had a soft spot for them. "Oh, aren't you a cute one?" he conversed with the cat, a sweet smile on his face as the animal poked its head into Magnus' palm, curving its neck in a silent demand for petting.
Magnus happily obliged their demands before his phone went off on the table by his right, the flashing light indicating a new message received. Before he could reach out for the phone, another beep announced the arrival of the second message, bringing concern to Magnus.
He couldn't get hold of Alexander the whole morning and he wondered if it had anything to do with that.
Opening up his phone, Magnus blinked a few times in wonder to find, without a doubt a message from a Lightwood, just not the one he was expecting. Isabelle's name flashed on the screen.
INBOX: (2)
FROM ISABELLE: MAGNUS, STAY AWAY FROM THE INSTITUTE.
FROM ISABELLE: CLAVE IS AFTER U.
Frowning at his phone, Magnus tried to make sense of the words. He pondered about going straight for the call, abandoning the whole messaging thing but his thoughts were interrupted by the Typing... notice in the conversation screen. He decided to wait it out and let Isabelle do it her way first. Maybe there was a reason she couldn't have called. In their line of work, and considering the news she had just presented for him, that might very well be a real possibility.
Before long, a new message popped in.
FROM ISABELLE: SOMETHING WENT WRONG WITH ALDERTREE.
Magnus stared at the screen, with a crease in his forehead noticeably increasing by each passing second on the clock. Just before he and Alec separated after their initial reunion outside the Institute, following the horrific events that took place just the other day, Alexander had told Magnus of the likely questioning that Aldertree would probably be in charge of.
He just wasn't aware he would be the topic of it.
Though, now that he knew, the fire message that he had received from the Head of the Institute just a short while ago made a whole lot more sense now. He was skeptical about it from the very beginning. Despite the summons demanding his presence immediately Magnus was neither naive nor strategically clueless enough to not understand that Clave was probably up to something more serious than his petty crime to the Shadowhunter named Raj. Adding together the fact of not being able to contact Alexander... speaking of, he quickly typed in a message.
YOU: IS ALEC OK?
Immediately the screen started flashing the notice of someone Typing...
FROM ISABELLE: I DONT KNOW.
FROM ISABELLE: BUT DONT COME.
FROM ISABELLE: WILL TEXT U BACK.
A series of separate messages blinked into existence on Magnus' phone, a sheer warning in them. It would be a lie if he said he wasn't even more worried now and the itch to ignore the warnings and just go blazing into the Institute was planting its seed inside him, but he knew he couldn't disrespect Isabelle like that. She already had enough on her plate as it was - what with the whole fiasco with Raphael and Yin Fen finally coming to a close, she wasn't anywhere near back on her own two feet. So for her to make this effort in order to deliver the message to Magnus, he could only do his best to clench the force of his natural instincts and stay put in wait of further news, trusting Isabelle to keep an eye on Alexander for him.
He decided a simple message would suffice.
YOU: THANK YOU, ISABELLE.
There were no messages after that.
After a few seconds Magnus put the phone back on the small table by his side.
As if only now remembering, he turned around in search of the felines, but those too, were long since gone.
With a sigh, Magnus slumped back into his chair. He could feel it was only a beginning of yet another headache.
Silence.
It was all just so silent.
The trapping runes were one of the most simple, convenient and ruthless ways of dealing with prisoners. Those naive enough, jumped at the opportunity to be kept inside them instead of torture, but every Shadowhunter clever enough knew the cruelty of the false hope that those runes created for people.
It wasn't just that you were unable to get out of there from the inside – with stele or not – it was also the fact that it masked your very presence. Unless purposely searching, nobody would feel you out there, while passing by.
It was also completely isolated from any sounds. Before long, only the noise of your own breathing and pulse inside your ears could somehow reassure you of not having lost the ability to hear.
Time moved differently inside the trapping runes. Or rather, without any resources from the outside world, the natural body senses were dulled to a close minimum, being unable to really tell how much time had passed.
When Alec was still counting time, he managed to reach a whole of twenty minutes before giving up and slumping on the cold ground with his head leaned against the wall.
He didn't know how much time had passed...
Did anyone notice that he was missing?
Did Aldertree finish his questionings?
Did he already have a solid case on Magnus?
The latest thought plagued his mind like no other, digging its claws against his ribcage, scratching him from within.
He nearly had two panic attacks, which he managed to overcome only with the sheer determination to not fail Magnus completely, to not give up until he was sure there could be nothing else done.
Magnus was his only anchor.
He was also the reason of his most devastating thoughts.
A Shadowhunter could never be with a Downworlder, Aldertree's words kept ringing in his ears. And though he loathed to even think about it, he couldn't help wondering what if it was only the beginning? What if this was how it would always be from now on – first his own family, then the Soul Sword and now the Clave together with his family – what if they were bound to be hunted for their relationship for life? Never to be accepted. Never to be left at peace. Magnus never truly safe. And if the Clave really had decided to go after Magnus, would Alec be enough to stop them? After all, he was only a single Shadowhunter against an army of elite Shadowhunter forces. How could he win against that?
What if he wasn't enough?
His love for Magnus was still such a fresh experience for him. He didn't want to awaken it only to have to lose it not even a whole day after.
If there was a way for them... if he could continue to love and be loved, he wanted to do everything in his power to fight for it. To give it a proper chance – to know and feel Magnus even more.
His heart beat wildly in his chest, his throat burning as tears once again started to sting his eyes. He tried to blink them away, furiously, while his hands stayed firmly on the ground, seeping in the cold to keep himself grounded.
He was feeling such an unbearable pain – a pain like that, he only felt once in his life, and that too, he felt today, a few hours ago while he was still desperately searching for Magnus in the aftermath of Valentine's attack.
He couldn't understand... how could Jace not feel this? How could he not understand that something must be awfully wrong for Alec to feel this way? Why was he not looking for Alec? Was it... was it too late already? Did Magnus already come blazing into the Institute, unaware, only to get stabbed in the back with a Seraph blade that Aldertree held in his hand? Or worse, maybe it was not Aldertree himself but someone from Alec's team, someone he had known for years, someone he had trained and went on missions with – someone on his side... someone who now held his lover pierced through with his sword.
He couldn't do this.
He needed to get out of there.
His breathing had picked up pace as he wobbled to stand onto his feet, his hands helping him to keep stability.
"JACEEE!" he yelled out in frustration, bending over with hands on his knees as his heart kept on dancing wildly in his chest, kept on throbbing in pain.
Where was everyone?
Why was nobody coming for him?
He needed to get to Magnus before...
He closed his eyes, swallowing the lump that formed in his throat, choking on air as he exhaled loudly.
He could feel sweat rolling down his temple... his vision was starting to swim, black dots forming-
When suddenly a loud bang echoed somewhere on his left side. Still with cloudy vision and bent over, Alec turned his head to take a look and nearly collapsed from happiness and relief.
It was Jace!
His parabatai had finally noticed that he was missing.
He leaned over, hands against his knees, gulping big amounts of air as he forced his breathing into a somewhat regular speed.
He had Jace.
He wasn't left alone.
He would help Alec.
Faintly and gradually he could hear the wall trembling from the other side – the stele burning a deactivating rune from the outside.
When the wall finally broke, Alec felt his legs give away only to be caught in his parabatai's strong arms, a series of apologies and reassurances whispered in his ear.
He took a moment to clutch onto Jace's shoulders, taking strength from him but didn't linger. Mustering all his strength, he slowly straightened up, with the help of Jace, and just patted him on the shoulder in thanks before going where he had to be since the beginning.
Magnus. He had to contact Magnus.
"Alec, what's going on here? Who did this to you? Was it Aldertree?" Jace started questioning him, or maybe he had been for a while now just Alec didn't hear him before now, as his hearing only now started to come back to life.
He swallowed, before finding his voice, still shaky. "I... I need to find Magnus."
He barely took a single step, Jace's mouth half open, ready to tell him something else when the blazing noise that had been echoing throughout the hallway finally registered into Alec's brain for what it was.
At first he thought it was the ringing of his ears, but now Alec could clearly understand what that sound meant – it was the alarm.
Stopping dead in his tracks, his face losing the barely there as it was colour, he shook his head at the fact. "No..."
"Alec, you need to know something-" Jace started speaking again but was quickly shushed with a protesting hand.
He didn't need Jace to tell him anything.
For he already knew everything.
He was already too late.
Aldertree had administrated the case on Magnus.
He could feel Jace shifting on his feet from the side, until a hand came to rest on his shoulder that finally sprung Alec into action.
He needed to find Magnus NOW.
Before Jace could even protest, his legs had started to move on their own free will, sending him through the hallways, weaving through the loitering people who were rushing about, eager and curious to see what was all the commotion about, while Alec had only one thought in mind – find his phone and call Magnus.
He pushed force into his half-dead feet, willing himself to run faster and more than one time nearly colliding with a wall, leaving bruises in its wake as his hands kept protecting his unbalanced form.
With the last bit of effort, he finally reached the main hallway that contained his room.
Breathing heavily, he reached his hand towards the knob, turning it and pushing himself inside only to stop dead in his tracks at finding someone already inside his room.
Having his emotions so distorted, he felt rage quickly build up inside him as he watched none other than Raj rummaging through his things, his phone in hand.
" . ?" he said through gritted teeth, making the other Shadowhunter jump back in surprise, his one hand shooting towards his heart. "Shit, it's you."
With eyes narrowed impossibly thin, Alec stormed inside his room, stalking towards the other man. "What were you doing inside my room?" he asked again, demanded, really. When the other Shadowhunter failed to answer, Alec used the opportunity to glance at his hand that still held the black object in its grip. "Is that my phone?" he asked rhetorically and before Raj could even properly react, had the other Shadowhunter under his arms, pinned against the nearest wall in a choking grip.
Raj tried to hold his one hand in a mock surrender.
"Woah! Okay. Look, I don't know what kind of kinky stuff you and your Warlock boyfriend get into but this power play is really making me uncomfortable, man. If you two continue to keep assaulting me I'll have to report you back to the Clave-"
He was cut off by a more firm pressure against his windpipe, Alec's eyes shooting daggers at the sight of him. "Shut up and give my phone back to me."
He tried protesting, he really did, and that would probably go into his mission report on why he had failed a beginner's class mission on stealing a phone, but Raj was beginning to think that the forces of those few specific Shadowhunters were not something he wanted to get so much mixed with. It was better for him to just steer away from them altogether.
"For the love of- Here, take it." He pushed the phone into Alec's waiting hand, rubbing at his sore throat when he was finally released. "I really can't deal with you two."
As soon as Alec had his phone back with him, he glanced at the time and his face blanched.
Three hours.
Three hours had passed since Alec left Aldertree's office and the last of the (3) missed calls from Magnus had been over two hours ago.
He could feel his heart starting to pick up speed again but he quickly shook himself out of it, closing his eyes to gather himself and got ready to press on the call button-
"You sure you want to do that?"
Raj's voice worked like a bolting shock through his veins. He quickly spun around, and true enough, the guy still hadn't left. What was he still doing there? The face he had made must have really been one of a kind because at once Raj put his hands up in surrender, but not before commenting, "You do realize he's wanted for treason, right?" he asked Alec rather casually and the blank look that slowly morphed into a pained one on Alec's face was an answer enough. "I guess you didn't," Raj added and then hesitated before giving Alec a quick pat on the back and leaving the room. "Well, hang in there."
The hand that still held Alec's phone, fell down by his side.
Treason...
He knew it wasn't the sentence that scared him off, though, that too was highly concerning, no, it was the fact what it meant for Alec. Alec, who was a Shadowhunter, who's job, his duty was to follow orders, which now were to capture a criminal, who was Alec's lover and whom he could not contact unless he wanted to be deruned...
The very thought of losing his abilities as a Shadowhunter scared him to the deepest bits of his core. Because he knew that without his abilities, without his powers – he'd be useless. He'd be a mundane that could not do a damn thing. He'd be someone who could not protect anyone. Magnus included.
But if he didn't call, didn't warn Magnus, it would be only a matter of time before the Warlock would come blazing into the Institute only to be cuffed and lead to prison while Alec watched from the sidelines, or worse, by Alec's hand itself.
He closed his eyes while his hand gripped onto the phone tightly.
What should he do?
He couldn't not contact Magnus but also could not contact Magnus.
He hated the power that Aldertree had over him, over all of them.
He had been right. He was useless. And he could never be enough for Magnus. First day since they had confessed their mutual feelings for each other and he was already failing him, unable to balance between his work and love.
If only he was stronger...
If only he had thought faster...
If only he had realized it had been a trap...
Breathe... breathe... continue breathing... he needed to continue breathing...
He shook his head as thoughts of Magnus' disappointed face continued to surface into Alec's mind.
He was never going to be enough for Magnus...
He wasn't-
There was a knock on the door so abrupt that Alec nearly jumped out of his skin at the sound. Breathing heavily he watched how the doors slowly opened up until the dark head of his sister peeked out of it. Watching over her shoulder, she sneakily got inside his room, closing the doors behind herself and startled at the look on Alec's face.
"Izzy..." Alec started in a chocked whisper. "I need to call Magnus."
The face of certainty on his sister's face, came as a shock to him. "No, you can't."
"Izzy, I- I have to," he said through a series of deep breaths that he was taking in.
He thought if anyone, it was her that would understand him.
"Iz, it's Magnus-" he started but was quickly shushed by a soft hand on his shoulder, gripping him tight.
"Alec, it's all right. I get it." She spoke with such conviction that Alec was lead to believe her. And he did, when he heard what she said next. "I already texted Magnus."
A wave of intense relief filled his insides, while he had to shake his head a few times to be sure of what he had heard. "You did? When?"
Izzy smiled at him with an understanding only her smile could offer him. "As soon as the order was announced. I figured there was no telling if Aldertree won't ban communication later on."
Alec nodded, the blood slowly receding from his head. "And your phone?" he asked, because contacting Magnus was one thing, but if Izzy got caught, it'd be all for nothing. When she didn't answer at once, his worries only increased and he asked her again, more firmly. "Izzy, what about your phone? If Aldertree sees-"
She shook her head. "Already disposed of. And-"
There was a moment where her hand dove quickly in her cleavage and Alec's eyes nearly bulged out of his head, turning away at the sudden awkwardness that Izzy was proposing, but he had too much trust in his sister to not realize she must have hid something... there.
He didn't know if he wanted to know what.
When he saw what it was, he knew that he did. Very much so.
A prepaid phone was thrust into his waiting hand and Alec didn't know if there was ever a gift more thought out and more meaningful than this. "Here, in case you want to call Magnus," she told him with a teasing grin, while Alec's love for his sister swelled inside his heart.
"How... how did you get this?" he asked, still a little thrown off and breathless. His hand kept turning the device from side to side, searching for ways it could have been already compromised by Aldertree.
He found none.
"Oh, it's one of the last few that's left of my secret communicators with Merlion."
And then he was certain that he should never doubt his sister's abilities of getting the information in stealthy ways. Apparently she knew what she was doing way better than Alec. And that was the only reason he still had some hope in making things right with Magnus before Aldertree could potentially ruin everything.
With two hurried, small steps, he reached his sister in a tight embrace, holding her tightly to his heart and whispering words of gratitude and love. He truly wouldn't know what he would do without her.
When the two separated, Izzy's smiling face shone brighter to him than ever, only the residues of dark shadows under her eyes held as a reminder of things and words that were said between them. "Iz, about all that's happened..."
"I know," she agreed with a small smile. "But, Alec, we can talk about this later. Magnus needs you right now."
He still tried protesting, not wanting to leave his sister yet again to deal with everything that happened to her and he wished with every fiber of his being to be there for her, as her brother, but Izzy continued to urge him to just get a move on and finally call Magnus, reasoning that his case was more important than the residues of her addiction.
The trembling that still tormented Alec's body, worked as yet another argument in her favor and finally Alec had to give in, not being able to dwell much longer on not contacting Magnus.
They decided the safest way was if one of them kept watch outside, and Isabelle quickly situated herself just outside Alec's bedroom while giving him some privacy to talk with Magnus.
It took a few rings for someone to finally pick up on the other side.
He heard breathing and before he could filter his mouth, he blurted out a breathless Magnus in the phone.
There was some shifting on the other end and then a relieved sigh. "Alec? Are you okay?"
Hearing Magnus' voice after the cruelty of thoughts that he had, was like a balm on his sore wounds. It soothed him and made him want to leap from joy.
"Oh thank God," he breathed out, taking a big gulp of air. "Magnus, the Clave...they're uh... after you. We got tricked by Aldertree. The questioning it- it was a trap- Magnus, you have to put your wards up and don't come to the Institute-"
By the time he was done his voice was near non existent, hands shaking so much that his phone nearly slipped from his hand a few times and only the sheer will of staying in contact with Magnus helped him to keep enough of a grip on the device. In the time that Alec had started freaking out, Magnus voice had shifted to one of soothing and reassuring promises, while Alec cursed himself for his inability to keep himself together. Magnus was the one who needed reassurances here. Magnus was the one who was just a breath away from getting caught by the Clave. Instead, he still continued to talk Alec out of his panic, keeping him grounded.
"Okay, okay, Alec, slow down. Breathe. Are you with me?"
He swallowed one time, two, and then replied. "Yeah, I, uh... yeah."
"Good, now tell me everything from the beginning."
After briefing Magnus on the situation, Alec had finally felt himself relax a little. He checked with Isabelle if there was any movement from her side but after getting a negative, he breathed out in relief and settled leaning on the wall with his phone by his ear, Magnus on the other end.
He wasn't sure how long they still had or how long it would take for another chance like this so he was taking everything he could with this one chance.
There had been one thing, though, that he was rather reluctant to discuss with Magnus.
But he knew it had to be done.
"I think... I think my mother is behind this."
There was a moment of silence from the other end and then a soft reply. "Are you sure?"
Alec shrugged, not that Magnus would know. "I don't know. Probably."
"Mm. I take it Maryse didn't enjoy my party all that much then."
"Magnus..."
"I mean, with all the Warlock drama – getting spelled must have been the last straw for her."
The ironic way in which Magnus continued to speak finally forced Alec to stop him. "Magnus, this is serious."
A heavy sigh echoed through the phone. "I know it's serious, Alexander. I'm just trying to steer away my thoughts from the miserable fact that my boyfriend's mother wants me dead."
Something twisted inside Alec, which he later recognized as guilt.
Talk about having a messed up family... his would win awards any day.
"I'm sorry..." he whispered in a small voice, feeling so awfully sorry and responsible for everything that had been going on with Magnus. If he hadn't met Alec, he could be enjoying his life as an immortal right now, and not turning his head over his shoulder on every corner, fearing for his immortal life.
Sometimes Alec really, truly couldn't understand how could he be worth something more than a spare glance from Magnus? How could he be worth continuing to risk his life for?
His heart continued to throb painfully inside his chest.
The resonating sigh that came from the other end, only told Alec that Magnus was already aware of everything that went inside Alec's head in the past few minutes, including him blaming it all on himself and now he was ready to reassure Alec, once again, that he was worth it.
Which Alec highly doubted he was.
But such was the love of Magnus Bane.
"You have nothing to be sorry for, Alec. Your mother is not even the main villain here."
Alec scoffed. Because he - was one thing, but going as far as defending his psycho mother was just taking it too far. "How can you be defending her right now?" he asked incredulously.
"I'm not defending her, but Maryse is not the problem here. She's but a pawn in the Clave's game. The Clave is the main problem."
The Clave... it was more than just a problem.
It now held the key to life.
With a sigh, Alec replied, "Okay, so what're we going to do?"
to be continued... brush me a review, if you can, to let me know what you liked. See you soon, I hope!
