Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to X-Men: Evolution. Nor do I own any other references I might make in this story. I only own the situation and their witty dialogue.

A Number of Months Ago

Two masculine figures walked along the almost completely bare sidewalk. It was nothing like either of them were used to, where the streets and the sidewalk were overrun with people they almost had to fight to get through. The few people who did walk by seemed to be surprised with their presence. The air that they gave off was so completely different from the punks that usually walked around, acting like they were too good for Bayville. These two walked around and didn't just act like they were too good. They were so completely sure that they were too good for this place that they seemed to be of a completely different matter altogether than the others. They were like a Greek fire, floating on the surface of the water.

It was suburbia. Enough said.

They both wore dark, black sunglasses, one to hide a mutation in their eyes, and the other to look cool. The clothes they wore were eccentric compared to the usual suburban rags. The taller of the two with the mutated eyes wore a crisp, button up shirt, untucked, with sinfully tight pants tucked into riding boots. A hint of a goatee, long, shaggy hair. Three fingered gloves that looked badass, and a ragged brown trenchcoat.

The slightly shorter one had flaming orange hair spiked up to imitate wild fire, torn up faded jeans paired with rain boots, a few stolen leather wrist cuffs, and a baggy old shirt singed and so old that skin was poking out in some places. He didn't look so strange compared to your average scruffy punk, but the two of them together looked incredibly badass. As if they could just as easily beat you up as they could get into your pants. Depending on your gender and their preferences.

"So what is dere to do for fun 'round here?" A bored Gambit asked, who was so incredibly bored he appeared to lean back as he walked. An equally bored Pyro sighed.

"Why you askin' me, mate? I'm just as stumped as you are." Especially since he was forbidden from using fire in public when he wasn't on a mission. Damn Mags and the dirt he had on everybody to bend them to his will.

"Dere's a surprisin' lack o' pretty girls." Remy noted, and a passing woman glared at him, "'Cept you, belle." Remy smiled charmingly and the woman blushed slightly and continued on, incredibly flustered.

"The bunch we fought had a pretty nice selection of sheilas." John shrugged.

"Xavier's followers?" Remy contemplated the fight. It was pretty low for his standards; he was used to using at least half a deck against a gang of organized fighters. Instead, he barely used a suite. It was a sad day for the X-Men in terms of how easy it was to completely own them in every aspect of the word.

That girl, though, with the unbelievably heavy makeup. If the eye contact wasn't in incredibly short range and hadn't lasted for such a long time, she probably would have landed in a good hit or two. He bet he could have used a whole suite on her. It was only luck and his thief-like cunning that let him sneak up on her while she was using her smarts to try and sneak up on them. He hadn't even seen her sneaking up on them until he wandered away from the battle out of boredom.

"I heard at the mansion this one chick is made of fire. Hear that, Remy? Made. Of. Fire."

"I hear y'." Remy sighed.

He wondered if the hot chick he sort of tried to blow up was still alive.

He should look into that.


And so he did look into it. And kidnapped her. And then proceeded to stalk her. With her knowledge, of course. Just not her consent.


The Present

"G'mornin' cherie." A husky voice said from the balcony.

Kitty giggled, brushing her hair by the window.

Rogue didn't even blink and instead just turned the page in her book. The Once and Future King. She usually strayed from stories of Camelot—She was once compared to a female Mordred in her younger days, before she tried to kill her adoptive mother. She failed to see the irony now. Mystique was no King Arthur.

"Logan hates the smell of gumbo. Those three tears in yo' coat shoulda taught you that by now."

"Dis Cajun is a slow learner. 'S gon' take more den a near brush wit' death t' get dat t'rough dis thick skull." He tapped his head with a card and gracefully leapt from the balcony railing onto the floor. Like a cat. A manly cat. Remy was a panther.

"How 'bout Ah call him in for y' so he can give ya another lesson? Maybe it won't just be a near brush this tahme."

Kitty giggled again. "You guys are like, so made for each other. We should film this and like, make a television show out of it."

"First Ah have tah get a boob job and he has to get famous. We already have the crazy factor needed fo' a reality show."

"Quicksilver delivery service!" A loud voice rang out through the hallways before a white blur appeared in their room, the door slamming open and probably causing a hole in the wall from the force in which the doorknob hit it.

"Fuck, Maximoff! What the hell are you doin' here?"

"I told you! Quicksilver delivery service—" The I'm-so-sexy-bow-down-before-me smirk quickly faded into a look of outrage, "What-the-hell-is-he-doing-here!?" Pietro pointed an accusing finger at Remy leaning languidly against the wall.

"'M de one wit' the actual invite."

"Says who?" Rogue asked, turning another page in her book.

"De petit chat over dere in deh corner."

"What?" Kitty threw up her hands defensively, "He's cute and he likes you. As a roommate I give him visiting rights."

"Oh. Right. Kitty, Lance wants me to give you this," He gave her a pink stuffed cat, "And a proposal to accompany him this Sunday evening in an outing about the town."

"I, like, totally accept." Kitty hugged the kitty to her with a smile.

"So," Pietro sped over to where Rogue was lounging on her bed. She glared, "The Once and Future King, huh? A pretty good read. He wasn't kidding when he said those were his own interpretations of the characters. Merlyn (Merlin) kind of reminds me of Benjamin Button."

"Only with a shitload more influence and half of his good looks." Rogue scoffed before looking thoughtfully at Pietro, "Ah'm surprised, Maximoff."

Remy raised an eyebrow.

"At my ability to make such astounding connections?" The I'm-so-sexy-bow-down-before-me smirk was back.

"Nah, Ah didn't know that ya could both read and sit through an entire movie."

"I'm a man of many talents." Pietro adapted a 'cool' pose and grinned down at her.

Rogue snorted and turned another page.

"Is one of dose talents comin' in uninvited 'n makin' an ass o' y'self, homme?" Remy asked coolly. He shuffled his deck of cards, looking very menacing indeed.

"No, that's more like your talent. Why's he even here, Roguey? He works for my father!"

"Mah name ain't Roguey."

"Actually, he kind of quit. A while ago. He's thinking about joining the mansion." Kitty informed him, reminding them that yes, she was still in the room.

"And y' still one of de bad guys." Remy smirked.

"I resent that." Pietro huffed, "So Roguey, what're you doing later?"

Rogue rolled her eyes.

"Why do you want tah know?"

"A date, of course!"

Kitty burst into a coughing fit.

Remy frowned.

Rogue raised her eyebrows.

"Ah dun do dates."

Pietro expected this. Anticipated this, even, so he could implement his genius plan.

Whine.

"Come oooonnnn."

"Mon chere said no, hein?"

"Ah ain't yo anythin', Swamp Rat." Rogue says automatically, not even caring about what he was actually saying. It was more rehearsed than anything.

Pietro pouted. This bet was going horribly. Roguey and this stupid red eyed dude had traditions. He says something, she snaps back a well remembered retort. That means that they've been talking long enough to have well remembered retorts! He's going to lose at this point.

He needed to strategize.

A manner of seconds go by, surprising compared to the speed at which he thought.

"Fine, fine. I'll see you later, Roguey."

"I told ya not ta call meh-"

And he was gone.

"Stupid jerk!"


Okay. Relax, Petey. You can handle this. You've handled worse before and came out relatively unscathed. You've betrayed your best friends and your sister for your twisted power-hungry father so you could finally have that "I'm proud of you, son" moment, which never happened even after you saved his butt from sure death and then gained back their trust. You've gotten out of jail countless times. You have an IQ that could pimpslap Daniels in the face and force him into prostitution. You can solve a rubik's cube in under ten seconds. You made that one child genius cry. You made those contestants on those local game shows you got onto cry. How many people have you made cry with your intellect? Your wit is as sharp and deadly as the claws on Wolverine's hairy, bloodthirsty hands.

Rogue is the rubik's cube.

Solve the rubik's cube.

Wait.

The bet was, technically, to prove that Rogue could love. And that Acolyte is pretty damn well near his goal of love and affection, judging from how Rogue was so comfortable with him. Way less ready to throw a punch in his face compared to how her shoulders tensed up around Pietro. Technically, if Rogue fell for Gambit, Pietro would still win the bet. Right?

Fuck, that would be a blow to his ego. Pietro never lost anything! Ever! He wouldn't bow down to Gambit just because that would be both easier and the more intelligent choice. He would fight against the odds and win, dammit! And he'd be a sneaky bastard about it, too!

But, if that didn't work out, Gambit would be a pleasant loophole to the bet that would assure his victory.

Author's Note: I made her read The Once and Future King as kind of a tribute to the second X-Men movie. And because I think Merlin is spiffy.

I'm basically just writing this all as I go, so I have no clue who I want to actually win Rogue's delicate, Southern heart. So if you want, you can act like it's a poll and tell me who you want her to end up with. Or if she should end up with someone completely seperate and unexpected. Or if she should end up with anybody at all! So I guess the options are Remy, Pietro, nobody, and other. Have fun voting!